Slightly revised at the bottom part where Konzen says, "I don't care" ^_^;;; You want elaboration, you get it! ^__^v See, requests are answered!

Chapter 26: Jibun Jishin no Ikiteru

Miramei rose the knife to her throat, smiling briefly as tears flowed freely.

Gojou looked in horror. "Miramei, d-don't joke around! This isn't funny! Now, just put that knife down...." He inched closer towards her, his hand outstretched.

"Stay away from me!" Miramei cried.

Gojou froze, then turned around and grabbed Konzen's shirt.

"Hoi! You-You do something! Don't you see she's serious? Do you want to lose her?!"

Konzen looked away. "If she chooses to die, I can't stop her."

"What are you talking at a time like this, you half baked monk??!"

Miramei jolted a little at Konzen's words, then smiled.

"I knew you'd say that, Konzen. Do you want to know what he was talking about?"

Konzen sniffed.

Miramei turned to look down at the bed, grasping the knife handle tightly, as if remembering something painful. No one noticed Hakkai, who was far away at one side of the room, looking stunned as if remembering his own past.

"While I was in that room, Akuma came... and I found out some of his shattered past. When I first arrived in Hell to 'train', I met him, the son of Enma. There, he was considered as a weakling and often shunned and overshadowed by his more charismatic brother, Ashi. He must have been admiring me from afar, for I found out in the days after that, that he was following me everywhere I went, like a little puppy."

Gojou lifted an eyebrow.

"So, I stopped one day and confronted him. We were happy in the days after that, for somehow with him, I felt that Hell wasn't as bleak as I thought. Though, I always thought of him as a little brother. His brother, Ashi, summoned me to his room one day and told me the truth. That Akuma was indeed in love with me. Ashi wanted me himself. Somehow, Akuma burst in when we weren't in a... nice position."

"What's that not-nice position, I wonder?" Gojou whispered to Goku.

"I don't know, maybe they were eating too much?" Goku whispered back.

Gojou: -_-+++++

" He thought that me and Ashi had done.. that already, and he went into hiding. I didn't see him in my last days in Hell, and I had no idea why he attacked his family. But he told me: that he was jealous of them, and something awakened inside him after he caught me and Ashi. He... all these years, he's been building up his power for one reason: Revenge. Revenge to the one that made him hurt the most. Me."

Miramei squeezed her eyes tightly. It was just too hard to bear. She, Destiny, was the reason for awakening the evil power. She choked a little.

"I... in that room, he.... he......"

Miramei broke down, sobbing. I can't tell them. It's too painful.

Suddenly she felt a hand on her shoulder. Looking up, she saw Kanzeon's face smiling gently.

"Shikkari shite. You don't have to tell us if you don't want to."

"But it's important." Miramei whispered. "I... am bearing... his child."

Kanzeon stumbled back, horrified. Konzen felt as if the words sliced through him. Gojou rushed again towards her.

"What are you saying? Of course that's not true! He probably told you that after you were knocked out for don't know how many hours! That's it---"

"Stay away!" Miramei held out the knife again. "I was... awake the whole time."

Gojou gasped, not making any movement this time. Instead he turned to see how Konzen was taking it.

The monk wasn't showing any expression, not that he could see any, with all the blonde hair covering his face, and the black shadow over his expression.

Miramei saw Konzen's reaction as well. With a smile, she lifted the knife to her throat and closed her eyes. "Goodbye, I loved you all."

The knife made a quick slashing motion. Blood spattered.

Am I dead? Are gods alive even when they are dead?

Miramei slowly opened her eyes. There was blood on her alright, but she... she could still see herself. Her head wasn't severed off. What happened?

She looked where the knife was lodged in, expecting to see it at her throat. Instead she saw it thrown deep into the white arm of someone. Someone?

She gasped, letting go of the knife. It stayed where it was, like a cruel tombstone. Miramei glanced up.

Pained green eyes stared back at her as his other able hand reached over and pulled out the knife.

The knife clattered to the ground as Hakkai lifted his hands and grasped her shoulders.

"I can't let you die. I can't let another person die." He stared into her eyes seriously.

Miramei stood frozen.

Hakkai smiled. "Jibun jishin no tame ni ikiteru, desho? Dakara, shinu dame onegai. Watashi-tachi wa, mada mada anata no tasukeru nda yo. (We live for ourselves, isn't that so? Then, please don't die. We still really need your help, you know.)

He winced in pain as blood gushed out from his stabbed arm.

"It's not anyone's right to choose to end their own fates. We survive because we have to. Right? There are so many forks in the road you are on. Please don't choose that one--"

Hakkai dropped to the ground as Miramei still froze. Cursing, Gojou ran and caught Hakkai in time just before he reached the ground.

"You are such a gambler, Hakkai! Damn all your advice, you aren't taking it yourself! Why did you do that?"

"She reminded me so much of Kana." With that, Hakkai fainted in Gojou's arms.

Kana, he said. I remember. That girl, who killed herself because she was impregnated by the 100-Eye devil.

She dropped to her knees. Miramei lifted her blood-stained hands and looked at them. She chose that way, and made a hole in someone's heart and past forever. How many holes will I create if I die?

A hand dropped down heavily on her head. She looked up in a mixture of surprise and guilt

"Don't pride yourself so much and take the blame for everything. Evil was already infesting itself in Akuma, you didn't do anything to him. And-" Konzen looked down at her.

"You shouldn't be thinking of ways to die. We'll find a way of dealing with what is inside you later. Don't let Hakkai's efforts be done in vain."

Konzen lifted his hand and slinked away, amazed at what he had just said.

Miramei grabbed his robe and held on. She stood up and stared into his eyes.

"You don't mind what he did to me? You don't mind even if my body's already tainted, already--"

Konzen covered her mouth with his hand.

"I don't care. All that doesn't matter anymore. Because......" You're all that matters to me now. Why can't I say that out?

babyg: Kakkoi na, Konzen !*heart**heart* I couldn't bring myself to make Konzen more OOC than he already is -_-;;; so, no kissing.... *sigh* I'm getting bored of Konzen, Konzen. Should I call him Sanzo next chap? ^__^ (fickle) Did you expect Hakkai to save her instead of Gojou or Konzen? I didn't seriously... he just leaped out... -_-;;;;