Chapter 4
Girl you should be MY girlfriend
A/N: You all have been begging me for the next chapter. Sorry it's taken so long, but writers block will do that to you I suppose.....hope it doesn't suck.
Harry sat in the Gryffindor common room, at one of the tables, apparently deep in thought. He was slowly bobbing his head, and occasionally writing something down. On closer inspection, you could see that he was wearing a pair of headphones much like the ones Kat owned. And that was how Ron found him when he walked in.
"Harry, you missed a good show in Charms! It was brilliant! Kat obviously said some incantation wrong, 'cause the next thing you know, Flitwick is up on the ceiling holding on for dear life to the light fixture. And then she tried to get him down, which really didn't work-"
And he had to stop there because he was laughing so hard. When he had regained his composure, he turned to Harry again and said, "So, what's up with you?"
It was then that he noticed Harry had headphones on his head. "Hey, isn't that the same thinga-ma-doodle that Kat had?"
Harry nodded and took them off. He handed them to Ron, who put them on his head.
"Hey, isn't this those 'In Step' guys?" Ron asked, bobbing his head to the music.
"Yeah, it is," answered Harry. "And it's N'SYNC, Ron," he added as an afterthought.
Ron took the headphones off and picked up the parchment on which Harry had been writing. "What're you listening to them for? I never knew you liked muggle music."
"Erm....." Harry said uncomfortably. "No particular reason.."
Ron looked at him and said "Now that right there is a load of bull. What're you up to?"
Harry sighed. Apparently he wasn't going to get out of this. "All right. I'm listening to them because..."
"Because..." prompted Ron.
"Because I"m tying to figure out a way to impress Kat," he finished lamely.
"So, you're listening to muggle music to impress Kat. Great plan, mate," Ron said sarcastically.
"No, there's more to it than that," Harry said. "See, this is her favorite band, right?"
"Right," said Ron.
"And her favorite people in her favorite band are Joey and Lance, correct?"
"Yeah, but where are you going with this?" Ron asked, thoroughly confused.
Harry rolled his eyes. "I'm going to dress up like one of them and sing to her."
Ron looked at him for a sec, then burst out laughing again. When he noticed Harry glaring at him, he stopped abruptly. "Oh, so you were serious?"
"Of course I'm serious!" Harry said indignantly.
Ron shrugged. "Sorry. Problem though, Harry. Can you even sing?"
Harry glared at him again and mumbled incoherently.
"I'll take that as a no."
"Well....." Ron tried again. "Can you dance?"
Harry mildly perked up again. "The dancing I can do."
Ron raised an eyebrow. "Since when? As far as I know from the last couple of Yule Balls you're as bad as me, if not worse."
Harry got out of his seat and did some quick fancy footwork, spun around and posed as he came to a stop.
"Whoa! Where'd you learn that?" Ron said, obviously impressed.
"I was hanging out at the mall a lot this summer. There was an arcade, and this one game that I suppose taught you how to dance. I'm pretty good at it. I guess that's where I picked it up from," Harry explained, shrugging and sitting down.
(A/N: That game would be Dance Dance Revolution, and that game equals ROOLZ!!! erm, getting back to the story...~_~;;;)
"Wicked," Ron grinned.
"But there's still the problem that you can't sing," Ron reminded him.
"Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know," Harry said, shaking his head.
"Lemme see the words," Ron said, indicating the lyric sheet on the table.
Harry handed it to him, and then handed him the headphones. Ron pushed the play button and put the phones on his head.
He listened for a while, then said "Actually, this isn't that hard, Harry."
"It is too if you can't sing," Harry muttered.
"Is not," Ron countered. "See, you just have to listen to their voices for a bit, then you start to pick it up. Like this-"
And he began to sing.
"Why don't you be my girlfriend? I'll treat you good! I know you hear your friends when they say you should. 'Cause if you were my girlfriend, I'd be your shining star! The one to show you where you are, girl you should be my girlfriend."
"HOLD IT!" Harry exclaimed as he shut the CD off.
He looked viciously at Ron and said "You never told me you could sing?!"
A small blush crept onto Ron's face. "Well, it never came up."
"But don't you think it's something you might have wanted to mention?"
Ron thought for a second. "No, not really," he said, shaking his head.
Harry stared at him for a while longer, then a wicked grin spread across his face. Ron noticed it and watched Harry warily.
"Harry...you have that 'I'm-going-to-pull-a-crazy-psychopath- Slytherin' look on your face," Ron said nervously.
"I've realized something, Ron," said Harry, steadily advancing on him. "You can sing. I can dance. Since I can't sing, and you can't dance, I believe there is some way that we can help each other..."
Ron started backing away from him. "Harry......."
Harry laughed evilly and pounced on Ron.
Draco rolled his eyes as he listened to the song. "Yeah, right. Like they really treat their girls like that.....bloody goody-two-shoe Americans...."
He was slumped in a chair in the Slytherin common room, listening to what looked like Kat's cd player. He wore a scowl on his face, and was narrowing his eyes in concentration. Do they honestly expect me to act like them? All honest and good, he thought furiously. He had an image to uphold. Screw 'em, then dump 'em. It was the Slytherin way. The Malfoy way. He frowned. Next thing you know, he'd be joining Hufflepuff house and singing kumbaya around the fireplace.
He rolled his eyes as he remembered his Cousin Mortimer. Poor child had been dropped by his mummy one to many times. It took all Draco had not to beat him with a large stick.
But getting back to the original train of thinking, he thought, Kat was a lot different. She wasn't like those run-of-the-mill Slytherins. Sure, she was a bit on the eccentric side, but nobody was perfect.
He smirked. Correction, nobody but a Malfoy was perfect.
So why was he risking his "I'm-a-sexy-pain-in-the-ass-bastard" reputation on her?
It wasn't just for the thrill of getting something that Potter didn't have, and watching him crumble helplessly as he swept Kat off her feet (though, it was a perk). She was something...special. She treated him like a person, not like the unreachable hot guy that all the other girls seemed to see him as. He saw their looks at him. Heard their furtive whispers to their friends, "Oh my GOD, he is so fine!" And they would be content if he even threw them a glare; they'd dissolve into a puddle of goop. Even those damn goody-good Gryffindors!
They weren't half bad looking, though. He just couldn't imagine, though, all those saints getting down and dirty. Not that he wanted to, that could just be scary. He shuddered inwardly as he imagined Neville getting his freak on.
However, he didn't want a girlfriend that was just solely focused on his looks. As much as nobody would even find this truthful, he wanted someone that saw him for who he was. Someone like Kat.
"Whoa," Draco said, shaking his head. "Getting a bit overly-dramatic there...don't want to be the first Slytherin ever with a heart, now do we?" he said sarcastically.
After all, what would father and the rest of his Death Eater chums think?
"So, in conclusion," Draco said, getting up from his chair, "I'm only going to make a fool out of myself, for a girl,(who, by the way, is nobody my father would approve of), by dressing up as one of those American-white boys and serenading her with music that sounds as if it's a number of choir boys going though puberty, in front of the whole bloody school, in an attempt to make Potter want to throw himself from the astronomy tower, and land at the bottom in a bloody heap, therefore forever ridding me of the 'Golden Boy' and all things affiliated with him thereof."
He nodded, satisfied, and went to raid his closet for the most boy- bandish thing he owned. Which, would be a pair of tight, black leather pants.
(A/N: Hmmm.....Draco in tight black leather pants....::drools over keyboard, sparks and flashiness ensues:: .....damnit..)
"I can't believe you're making me do this," Ron muttered angrily at Harry, who was surveying himself in the mirror. "I look like a right prat."
"No you-well, yeah. Yeah you do," said Harry, trying to make Ron feel better, but failing miserably. "But hey! I look like one, too, so we can be prats together!"
Ron stared blankly at him. "You're a real mental case, you know that Harry?" he stated, after much deliberation.
Harry shrugged sheepishly. "I'm not really helping, am I?"
"In a word, no," Ron said.
In Harry's attempt to look cool and like an American, he had scrounged around for baggy pants and cool t-shirts. He had settled on a pair of khakis and a black turtle-neck. Ron, who wasn't quite into the dressing up, had donned blue jeans and a white turtle-neck. They has opted to fine tune Harry's voice with a simple spell, so he didn't sound like crap anymore.
"Tell me again why we're doing this?" Ron questioned, looking hopelessly at his hair, which Harry had poofed so that he had a mini-afro.
"To impress Kat," Harry answered, frowning at his hair. The one time he wanted it to stick up, it remained flat. Oh, the irony of the situation!
"Right. Why can't you be like every other guy and just buy her flowers?" Ron said.
"Because I'm not every other guy," Harry said, giving up on his hair.
"Oh yes, that's right," said Ron sarcastically. "We're Mister Harry Potter! Mister Women's man! God's Gift to Women! Soon-to-be-Gilderoy Lockharts prodigy! The Boy who Charmed! The GREAT-"
"OK RON! I get the point!" Harry stated aggrivatedly.
"-CUTIE-MAN!" Ron continued.
"Wait, say WHAT?" Harry interrupted.
"Seriously, those are just half of your many nicknames," Ron said shrugging.
"Is it?" Harry asked, surprise written all over his face.
Ron nodded enthusiastically.
Harry was about to answer, when he heard the bell, scheduling that the last class of the day was through, and it was time for dinner.
"Well Ron. It's now or never," he said, glancing at himself one last time, nervously running a hand through his already hopeless hair.
"I'll settle for never if you're not up to it," Ron said, glancing hopefully at Harry.
"Let's do this," said Harry determinedly, and grabbed Ron and the cd player, and proceeded out of the dorm.
"My God, I must have reached an all time low," Draco muttered to himself, glaring at his reflection in the mirror.
He was wearing those tight black leather pants, a white muscle shirt, and a unbuttoned shirt over that.
"Ohhhh, I look like a hoodlum!" he moaned. "A hot one," he added as an afterthought. "BUT A HOODLUM NONE THE LESS!"
Even with all the many hair gel products he owned, none were strong enough to keep his hair in a spiked position. Eventually, he just gave up, and slicked it back as usual.
"I really must thank mother for putting me through that period of hell that was the children's choir," he mused. 5 years in it had given a voice to fool anyone into thinking he had been singing for years.
He looked at his watch. Well Malfoy old boy, he told himself, you still have time to forget this ever even happened. Do something productive like your Arithmancy homework..
"Naa," he said, grabbing his cd player. "Let's do this," he muttered, and raced out of the bathroom.
"Neville, have you seen Harry?"
Hermione, Neville, and Ginny were walking down the halls towards the Great Hall for dinner.
"Um, no Hermione. Not since lunch," Neville answered. "Wonder where he is?" "Come to think of it," Ginny added, "I haven't seen Ron in a while. What do you suppose they're up to?"
Hermione shook her head. "I've no idea. But knowing those two, it's bound to be something that's going to get them expelled."
They laughed heartily as they sat entered the Great Hall. Taking their seats at the table, Hermione looked around for a glimpse of Harry.
Or Ron, she added to herself. He's a friend of yours too you know.
Her thoughts were suddenly interrupted by a rather large shout of "Howdy, Mione!"
She jumped, startled and turned around rather angrily to face her attacker. She sighed inwardly. "Figures.." she muttered.
It was Kat, still decked in Gryffindor regalia.
"Katherine, you DO realize that the Slytherin table is on the OTHER side of the room?" inquired Hermione.
"Ya, but you guys are more fun!" Kat said, plopping down in the seat next to Hermione.
"Uh, Kat-" started Hermione.
"Wassup Nevi?" Kat interrupted, holding out her hand to him.
"Um..nothing much, really," answered Neville, awkwardly shaking her hand.
Kat laughed. "Nevi, you're supposed to give me five, dude, not shake."
Neville blushed sheepishly and said "Oh. I knew that."
They tried again, and got it right, so Kat smiled at him and everything was peachy-daisy.
Hermione was just about to tell Kat that the seat she was sitting in was reserved for Harry, when the doors to the Great Hall swung open.
She, along with the rest of the Great Hall turned to see who was entering.
In strolled Harry and Ron, and they briskly walked through the bewildered faces up to the Head Table. When they reached it, Dumbledore looked at Harry with questioning eyes, though they were twinkling. Harry smiled weakly back at him, and put his cd player down.
"Mr. Potter, what is the meaning of this?" Snape demanded.
"Nothing sir. Just this-" he answered, and turned on his cd.
I don't know why you care.
The girls from some of the tables who recognized this first line went into hysterics.
He doesn't even know you're there.
All the while he was walking to the Gryffindor table, the eyes of the whole Hall on him.
'Cause he don't love your eyes.
And he don't love your smile.
Girl, you know that ain't fair!
He had reached his destination, and stood before Kat, who was grinning like an idiot up at him. Then Ron started with him.
The middle of the night, is he gonna be by your side
Or will he run and hide
You don't know, 'cause things ain't clear!
And baby when you cry, is he gonna stand by your side
Does the man even know you're alive
Here Harry and Ron leaped on the table.
I got an idea...
And they danced.
Why don't you be my girlfriend?
I'll treat you good!
I know you hear your friends when they say you should.
The girls at the Gryffindor table (not to mention the other tables) were absolutely freaking out, Harry could sure dance! And Ron's voice was heavenly. Hermione was staring in disbelief at them both, but mostly at Harry who looked exactly like one of them boy band members.
'Cause if you were my girlfriend, I'd be your shining star!
The one to show you where you are
Harry looked pointedly at Kat, and he sang,
Girl you should be my girlfriend!
And quite unexpectedly, another voice started, startling Harry and Ron.
Does he know what you feel?
All heads turned to the source of the voice.
Are you sure that it's real?
If the girls in the Hall weren't excited yet, they were now. Draco Malfoy walked into the Great Hall, pointing at Harry as he sang.
Does he ease your mind
Or does he break your stride?
Did you know that love could be a shield?
Harry and Ron looked at each other, shrugged, and sang.
The middle of the night, is he gonna be by your side
Or will he run and hide
You don't know, 'cause things ain't clear!
And baby when you cry, is he gonna stand by your side
Does the man even know you're alive
Draco now leaped to the Slytherin table.
I got an idea...
And the three of them danced.
Why don't you be my girlfriend?
I'll treat you good!
I know you hear your friends when they say you should.
With every thrust of the boys hips, the girls were sent into fits of giddiness. Pansy Parkinson over at the Slytherin table fainted as she watched them dance, the girls were all cheering and screaming, and the boys were torn between the emotions of amusement, jealousy, or disbelief; amusement in the case of the Weasley twins, who were doubled up with laughter to the annoyance of the crazed Potter fans at the Gryffindor table, jealously in the case of all the guys in the Hall who's girlfriends hadn't been paying them a bit of attention since the whole damn thing began, and disbelief in the case of Seamus Finnigan, who just the other day bored all of the 6th year boys with a speech that addressed how all boy bands should be dragged into the middle of the courtyard square and be shot.
'Cause if you were my girlfriend
I'd be your shining star!
The one to show you where you are
Both Harry and Draco sang-
Girl you should be my girlfriend!
It was a mystery to Hermione how Harry had pulled this off, and it was even more of one how the hell Draco Malfoy could look so hot in a pair of black leather pants-wait a minute, did she just think that Malfoy looked HOT?
Ever since I saw your face, nothing in my life has been the same,
Draco got down from the Slytherin table and made his way to the Gryffindor one, where he looked Kat in the eye and sang.
I walk around just saying your name
Without you my world would end!
Harry knelt on the table and took Kat's hand, much to the annoyance of Hermione and Draco.
I looked around this whole damn place
and everything says you were meant to be
And Ron, who ultimately had the best voice out of the three sang-
My girllll-friend, oh!
Ron stood on Harry's left, and Draco (to the delight of the Gryffindor girls) stood on Harry's right. Harry stood up. Let the dancing commence.
Why don't you be my girlfriend?
I'll treat you good!
I know you hear your friends when they say you should.
'Cause if you were my girlfriend
I'd be your shining star!
The one to show you where you are
Girl you should be my girlfriend!
Oh, ohhh, ohh
Girl you should be my girlfriend!
Oh, ohhh, ohh
Girl you should be my girlfriend!
Oh, ohhh, ohh
Girl you should be my girlfriend!
Oh, ohhh, ohh
They all struck finishing poses, and Harry and Draco simultaneously said-
Girl you should be MY girlfriend!
The Great Hall erupted in screams as all the girls rushed the Gryffindor table. The teachers at the head table looked dumbstruck, except Hagrid, who was grinning like a Cheshire cat. "That's me boy!" And Dumbledore, who's eyes were dancing merrily, as he smiled toward the Gryffindor table where Harry and crew were being mauled.
"Harry, Ron, Drac, YOU GUYS ROCK!!!!" Kat exclaimed, as she leapt to the table, and engulfed each in a huge hug.
Harry blushed, Ron laughed, and Draco looked smug.
"Harry, you must be Joey," she said, turning to him. "Drac, you HAVE to be Lance," she said, grinning, and she turned to Ron. "And you must be Justin. Only he doesn't have the afro anymore."
"See?" demanded Ron, punching Harry in the arm. "Told you that was years ago!"
Harry laughed weakly, as he was pat on the back by the Weasleys, and asked for autographs by the many girls that swarmed the table. Ginny was blushing her head off, and was staring up at him in amazement, the other girls were pushing and fighting their way to the front, where Draco was selling autographs, and Ron was shaking hands.
"Hmm. I've never really had much of a thing for Justin, but I just might change my mind," Kat said, smiling at Ron, who grinned back, until he was grabbed by a member of the crowd and pulled in, where he was ambushed.
"And you all did this, just for me?" Kat asked, looking at Harry.
"Erm....yes?" Harry said sheepishly, ears turning pink again.
"Like I said, you guys KICK-ASS!!" she said, and gave him a monstrous hug.
Harry grinned like an idiot, blushing a very interesting shade of magenta.
It was then he realized that something was missing from the happy mass of Gryffindor, Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw, and Slytherin students.
Hermione.
So, what did ya think?!?! Like I said, I've been SO low on inspiration, so very sorry this came out so late! It wasn't as funny as I wanted it to be, but you know, what 'choo gonna do, eh? Review please, and I'll try to have the 5th chapter up soon.
Girl you should be MY girlfriend
A/N: You all have been begging me for the next chapter. Sorry it's taken so long, but writers block will do that to you I suppose.....hope it doesn't suck.
Harry sat in the Gryffindor common room, at one of the tables, apparently deep in thought. He was slowly bobbing his head, and occasionally writing something down. On closer inspection, you could see that he was wearing a pair of headphones much like the ones Kat owned. And that was how Ron found him when he walked in.
"Harry, you missed a good show in Charms! It was brilliant! Kat obviously said some incantation wrong, 'cause the next thing you know, Flitwick is up on the ceiling holding on for dear life to the light fixture. And then she tried to get him down, which really didn't work-"
And he had to stop there because he was laughing so hard. When he had regained his composure, he turned to Harry again and said, "So, what's up with you?"
It was then that he noticed Harry had headphones on his head. "Hey, isn't that the same thinga-ma-doodle that Kat had?"
Harry nodded and took them off. He handed them to Ron, who put them on his head.
"Hey, isn't this those 'In Step' guys?" Ron asked, bobbing his head to the music.
"Yeah, it is," answered Harry. "And it's N'SYNC, Ron," he added as an afterthought.
Ron took the headphones off and picked up the parchment on which Harry had been writing. "What're you listening to them for? I never knew you liked muggle music."
"Erm....." Harry said uncomfortably. "No particular reason.."
Ron looked at him and said "Now that right there is a load of bull. What're you up to?"
Harry sighed. Apparently he wasn't going to get out of this. "All right. I'm listening to them because..."
"Because..." prompted Ron.
"Because I"m tying to figure out a way to impress Kat," he finished lamely.
"So, you're listening to muggle music to impress Kat. Great plan, mate," Ron said sarcastically.
"No, there's more to it than that," Harry said. "See, this is her favorite band, right?"
"Right," said Ron.
"And her favorite people in her favorite band are Joey and Lance, correct?"
"Yeah, but where are you going with this?" Ron asked, thoroughly confused.
Harry rolled his eyes. "I'm going to dress up like one of them and sing to her."
Ron looked at him for a sec, then burst out laughing again. When he noticed Harry glaring at him, he stopped abruptly. "Oh, so you were serious?"
"Of course I'm serious!" Harry said indignantly.
Ron shrugged. "Sorry. Problem though, Harry. Can you even sing?"
Harry glared at him again and mumbled incoherently.
"I'll take that as a no."
"Well....." Ron tried again. "Can you dance?"
Harry mildly perked up again. "The dancing I can do."
Ron raised an eyebrow. "Since when? As far as I know from the last couple of Yule Balls you're as bad as me, if not worse."
Harry got out of his seat and did some quick fancy footwork, spun around and posed as he came to a stop.
"Whoa! Where'd you learn that?" Ron said, obviously impressed.
"I was hanging out at the mall a lot this summer. There was an arcade, and this one game that I suppose taught you how to dance. I'm pretty good at it. I guess that's where I picked it up from," Harry explained, shrugging and sitting down.
(A/N: That game would be Dance Dance Revolution, and that game equals ROOLZ!!! erm, getting back to the story...~_~;;;)
"Wicked," Ron grinned.
"But there's still the problem that you can't sing," Ron reminded him.
"Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know," Harry said, shaking his head.
"Lemme see the words," Ron said, indicating the lyric sheet on the table.
Harry handed it to him, and then handed him the headphones. Ron pushed the play button and put the phones on his head.
He listened for a while, then said "Actually, this isn't that hard, Harry."
"It is too if you can't sing," Harry muttered.
"Is not," Ron countered. "See, you just have to listen to their voices for a bit, then you start to pick it up. Like this-"
And he began to sing.
"Why don't you be my girlfriend? I'll treat you good! I know you hear your friends when they say you should. 'Cause if you were my girlfriend, I'd be your shining star! The one to show you where you are, girl you should be my girlfriend."
"HOLD IT!" Harry exclaimed as he shut the CD off.
He looked viciously at Ron and said "You never told me you could sing?!"
A small blush crept onto Ron's face. "Well, it never came up."
"But don't you think it's something you might have wanted to mention?"
Ron thought for a second. "No, not really," he said, shaking his head.
Harry stared at him for a while longer, then a wicked grin spread across his face. Ron noticed it and watched Harry warily.
"Harry...you have that 'I'm-going-to-pull-a-crazy-psychopath- Slytherin' look on your face," Ron said nervously.
"I've realized something, Ron," said Harry, steadily advancing on him. "You can sing. I can dance. Since I can't sing, and you can't dance, I believe there is some way that we can help each other..."
Ron started backing away from him. "Harry......."
Harry laughed evilly and pounced on Ron.
Draco rolled his eyes as he listened to the song. "Yeah, right. Like they really treat their girls like that.....bloody goody-two-shoe Americans...."
He was slumped in a chair in the Slytherin common room, listening to what looked like Kat's cd player. He wore a scowl on his face, and was narrowing his eyes in concentration. Do they honestly expect me to act like them? All honest and good, he thought furiously. He had an image to uphold. Screw 'em, then dump 'em. It was the Slytherin way. The Malfoy way. He frowned. Next thing you know, he'd be joining Hufflepuff house and singing kumbaya around the fireplace.
He rolled his eyes as he remembered his Cousin Mortimer. Poor child had been dropped by his mummy one to many times. It took all Draco had not to beat him with a large stick.
But getting back to the original train of thinking, he thought, Kat was a lot different. She wasn't like those run-of-the-mill Slytherins. Sure, she was a bit on the eccentric side, but nobody was perfect.
He smirked. Correction, nobody but a Malfoy was perfect.
So why was he risking his "I'm-a-sexy-pain-in-the-ass-bastard" reputation on her?
It wasn't just for the thrill of getting something that Potter didn't have, and watching him crumble helplessly as he swept Kat off her feet (though, it was a perk). She was something...special. She treated him like a person, not like the unreachable hot guy that all the other girls seemed to see him as. He saw their looks at him. Heard their furtive whispers to their friends, "Oh my GOD, he is so fine!" And they would be content if he even threw them a glare; they'd dissolve into a puddle of goop. Even those damn goody-good Gryffindors!
They weren't half bad looking, though. He just couldn't imagine, though, all those saints getting down and dirty. Not that he wanted to, that could just be scary. He shuddered inwardly as he imagined Neville getting his freak on.
However, he didn't want a girlfriend that was just solely focused on his looks. As much as nobody would even find this truthful, he wanted someone that saw him for who he was. Someone like Kat.
"Whoa," Draco said, shaking his head. "Getting a bit overly-dramatic there...don't want to be the first Slytherin ever with a heart, now do we?" he said sarcastically.
After all, what would father and the rest of his Death Eater chums think?
"So, in conclusion," Draco said, getting up from his chair, "I'm only going to make a fool out of myself, for a girl,(who, by the way, is nobody my father would approve of), by dressing up as one of those American-white boys and serenading her with music that sounds as if it's a number of choir boys going though puberty, in front of the whole bloody school, in an attempt to make Potter want to throw himself from the astronomy tower, and land at the bottom in a bloody heap, therefore forever ridding me of the 'Golden Boy' and all things affiliated with him thereof."
He nodded, satisfied, and went to raid his closet for the most boy- bandish thing he owned. Which, would be a pair of tight, black leather pants.
(A/N: Hmmm.....Draco in tight black leather pants....::drools over keyboard, sparks and flashiness ensues:: .....damnit..)
"I can't believe you're making me do this," Ron muttered angrily at Harry, who was surveying himself in the mirror. "I look like a right prat."
"No you-well, yeah. Yeah you do," said Harry, trying to make Ron feel better, but failing miserably. "But hey! I look like one, too, so we can be prats together!"
Ron stared blankly at him. "You're a real mental case, you know that Harry?" he stated, after much deliberation.
Harry shrugged sheepishly. "I'm not really helping, am I?"
"In a word, no," Ron said.
In Harry's attempt to look cool and like an American, he had scrounged around for baggy pants and cool t-shirts. He had settled on a pair of khakis and a black turtle-neck. Ron, who wasn't quite into the dressing up, had donned blue jeans and a white turtle-neck. They has opted to fine tune Harry's voice with a simple spell, so he didn't sound like crap anymore.
"Tell me again why we're doing this?" Ron questioned, looking hopelessly at his hair, which Harry had poofed so that he had a mini-afro.
"To impress Kat," Harry answered, frowning at his hair. The one time he wanted it to stick up, it remained flat. Oh, the irony of the situation!
"Right. Why can't you be like every other guy and just buy her flowers?" Ron said.
"Because I'm not every other guy," Harry said, giving up on his hair.
"Oh yes, that's right," said Ron sarcastically. "We're Mister Harry Potter! Mister Women's man! God's Gift to Women! Soon-to-be-Gilderoy Lockharts prodigy! The Boy who Charmed! The GREAT-"
"OK RON! I get the point!" Harry stated aggrivatedly.
"-CUTIE-MAN!" Ron continued.
"Wait, say WHAT?" Harry interrupted.
"Seriously, those are just half of your many nicknames," Ron said shrugging.
"Is it?" Harry asked, surprise written all over his face.
Ron nodded enthusiastically.
Harry was about to answer, when he heard the bell, scheduling that the last class of the day was through, and it was time for dinner.
"Well Ron. It's now or never," he said, glancing at himself one last time, nervously running a hand through his already hopeless hair.
"I'll settle for never if you're not up to it," Ron said, glancing hopefully at Harry.
"Let's do this," said Harry determinedly, and grabbed Ron and the cd player, and proceeded out of the dorm.
"My God, I must have reached an all time low," Draco muttered to himself, glaring at his reflection in the mirror.
He was wearing those tight black leather pants, a white muscle shirt, and a unbuttoned shirt over that.
"Ohhhh, I look like a hoodlum!" he moaned. "A hot one," he added as an afterthought. "BUT A HOODLUM NONE THE LESS!"
Even with all the many hair gel products he owned, none were strong enough to keep his hair in a spiked position. Eventually, he just gave up, and slicked it back as usual.
"I really must thank mother for putting me through that period of hell that was the children's choir," he mused. 5 years in it had given a voice to fool anyone into thinking he had been singing for years.
He looked at his watch. Well Malfoy old boy, he told himself, you still have time to forget this ever even happened. Do something productive like your Arithmancy homework..
"Naa," he said, grabbing his cd player. "Let's do this," he muttered, and raced out of the bathroom.
"Neville, have you seen Harry?"
Hermione, Neville, and Ginny were walking down the halls towards the Great Hall for dinner.
"Um, no Hermione. Not since lunch," Neville answered. "Wonder where he is?" "Come to think of it," Ginny added, "I haven't seen Ron in a while. What do you suppose they're up to?"
Hermione shook her head. "I've no idea. But knowing those two, it's bound to be something that's going to get them expelled."
They laughed heartily as they sat entered the Great Hall. Taking their seats at the table, Hermione looked around for a glimpse of Harry.
Or Ron, she added to herself. He's a friend of yours too you know.
Her thoughts were suddenly interrupted by a rather large shout of "Howdy, Mione!"
She jumped, startled and turned around rather angrily to face her attacker. She sighed inwardly. "Figures.." she muttered.
It was Kat, still decked in Gryffindor regalia.
"Katherine, you DO realize that the Slytherin table is on the OTHER side of the room?" inquired Hermione.
"Ya, but you guys are more fun!" Kat said, plopping down in the seat next to Hermione.
"Uh, Kat-" started Hermione.
"Wassup Nevi?" Kat interrupted, holding out her hand to him.
"Um..nothing much, really," answered Neville, awkwardly shaking her hand.
Kat laughed. "Nevi, you're supposed to give me five, dude, not shake."
Neville blushed sheepishly and said "Oh. I knew that."
They tried again, and got it right, so Kat smiled at him and everything was peachy-daisy.
Hermione was just about to tell Kat that the seat she was sitting in was reserved for Harry, when the doors to the Great Hall swung open.
She, along with the rest of the Great Hall turned to see who was entering.
In strolled Harry and Ron, and they briskly walked through the bewildered faces up to the Head Table. When they reached it, Dumbledore looked at Harry with questioning eyes, though they were twinkling. Harry smiled weakly back at him, and put his cd player down.
"Mr. Potter, what is the meaning of this?" Snape demanded.
"Nothing sir. Just this-" he answered, and turned on his cd.
I don't know why you care.
The girls from some of the tables who recognized this first line went into hysterics.
He doesn't even know you're there.
All the while he was walking to the Gryffindor table, the eyes of the whole Hall on him.
'Cause he don't love your eyes.
And he don't love your smile.
Girl, you know that ain't fair!
He had reached his destination, and stood before Kat, who was grinning like an idiot up at him. Then Ron started with him.
The middle of the night, is he gonna be by your side
Or will he run and hide
You don't know, 'cause things ain't clear!
And baby when you cry, is he gonna stand by your side
Does the man even know you're alive
Here Harry and Ron leaped on the table.
I got an idea...
And they danced.
Why don't you be my girlfriend?
I'll treat you good!
I know you hear your friends when they say you should.
The girls at the Gryffindor table (not to mention the other tables) were absolutely freaking out, Harry could sure dance! And Ron's voice was heavenly. Hermione was staring in disbelief at them both, but mostly at Harry who looked exactly like one of them boy band members.
'Cause if you were my girlfriend, I'd be your shining star!
The one to show you where you are
Harry looked pointedly at Kat, and he sang,
Girl you should be my girlfriend!
And quite unexpectedly, another voice started, startling Harry and Ron.
Does he know what you feel?
All heads turned to the source of the voice.
Are you sure that it's real?
If the girls in the Hall weren't excited yet, they were now. Draco Malfoy walked into the Great Hall, pointing at Harry as he sang.
Does he ease your mind
Or does he break your stride?
Did you know that love could be a shield?
Harry and Ron looked at each other, shrugged, and sang.
The middle of the night, is he gonna be by your side
Or will he run and hide
You don't know, 'cause things ain't clear!
And baby when you cry, is he gonna stand by your side
Does the man even know you're alive
Draco now leaped to the Slytherin table.
I got an idea...
And the three of them danced.
Why don't you be my girlfriend?
I'll treat you good!
I know you hear your friends when they say you should.
With every thrust of the boys hips, the girls were sent into fits of giddiness. Pansy Parkinson over at the Slytherin table fainted as she watched them dance, the girls were all cheering and screaming, and the boys were torn between the emotions of amusement, jealousy, or disbelief; amusement in the case of the Weasley twins, who were doubled up with laughter to the annoyance of the crazed Potter fans at the Gryffindor table, jealously in the case of all the guys in the Hall who's girlfriends hadn't been paying them a bit of attention since the whole damn thing began, and disbelief in the case of Seamus Finnigan, who just the other day bored all of the 6th year boys with a speech that addressed how all boy bands should be dragged into the middle of the courtyard square and be shot.
'Cause if you were my girlfriend
I'd be your shining star!
The one to show you where you are
Both Harry and Draco sang-
Girl you should be my girlfriend!
It was a mystery to Hermione how Harry had pulled this off, and it was even more of one how the hell Draco Malfoy could look so hot in a pair of black leather pants-wait a minute, did she just think that Malfoy looked HOT?
Ever since I saw your face, nothing in my life has been the same,
Draco got down from the Slytherin table and made his way to the Gryffindor one, where he looked Kat in the eye and sang.
I walk around just saying your name
Without you my world would end!
Harry knelt on the table and took Kat's hand, much to the annoyance of Hermione and Draco.
I looked around this whole damn place
and everything says you were meant to be
And Ron, who ultimately had the best voice out of the three sang-
My girllll-friend, oh!
Ron stood on Harry's left, and Draco (to the delight of the Gryffindor girls) stood on Harry's right. Harry stood up. Let the dancing commence.
Why don't you be my girlfriend?
I'll treat you good!
I know you hear your friends when they say you should.
'Cause if you were my girlfriend
I'd be your shining star!
The one to show you where you are
Girl you should be my girlfriend!
Oh, ohhh, ohh
Girl you should be my girlfriend!
Oh, ohhh, ohh
Girl you should be my girlfriend!
Oh, ohhh, ohh
Girl you should be my girlfriend!
Oh, ohhh, ohh
They all struck finishing poses, and Harry and Draco simultaneously said-
Girl you should be MY girlfriend!
The Great Hall erupted in screams as all the girls rushed the Gryffindor table. The teachers at the head table looked dumbstruck, except Hagrid, who was grinning like a Cheshire cat. "That's me boy!" And Dumbledore, who's eyes were dancing merrily, as he smiled toward the Gryffindor table where Harry and crew were being mauled.
"Harry, Ron, Drac, YOU GUYS ROCK!!!!" Kat exclaimed, as she leapt to the table, and engulfed each in a huge hug.
Harry blushed, Ron laughed, and Draco looked smug.
"Harry, you must be Joey," she said, turning to him. "Drac, you HAVE to be Lance," she said, grinning, and she turned to Ron. "And you must be Justin. Only he doesn't have the afro anymore."
"See?" demanded Ron, punching Harry in the arm. "Told you that was years ago!"
Harry laughed weakly, as he was pat on the back by the Weasleys, and asked for autographs by the many girls that swarmed the table. Ginny was blushing her head off, and was staring up at him in amazement, the other girls were pushing and fighting their way to the front, where Draco was selling autographs, and Ron was shaking hands.
"Hmm. I've never really had much of a thing for Justin, but I just might change my mind," Kat said, smiling at Ron, who grinned back, until he was grabbed by a member of the crowd and pulled in, where he was ambushed.
"And you all did this, just for me?" Kat asked, looking at Harry.
"Erm....yes?" Harry said sheepishly, ears turning pink again.
"Like I said, you guys KICK-ASS!!" she said, and gave him a monstrous hug.
Harry grinned like an idiot, blushing a very interesting shade of magenta.
It was then he realized that something was missing from the happy mass of Gryffindor, Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw, and Slytherin students.
Hermione.
So, what did ya think?!?! Like I said, I've been SO low on inspiration, so very sorry this came out so late! It wasn't as funny as I wanted it to be, but you know, what 'choo gonna do, eh? Review please, and I'll try to have the 5th chapter up soon.