Chapter 10-New Moon
Sadie stayed in bed for some hours, feeling sorry for herself and hating everyone.
/If Voldemort hadn't killed my parents none of this would have ever happened...If Emma hadn't run away I wouldn't be all by myself...If Winsbree hadn't brought me to Voldemort, I would be in class right now, chatting with Emma...If Remus hadn't--/Sadie faltered and searched her mind for something Remus had done. But there wasn't anything. He'd always been a role-model to her, easy to talk to, happy to give advice, understood where she was coming from...Sadie frowned. More so than ever now, now that she was a werewolf too. Sadie furrowed her brow. And yet, she had never seen him bitter, or even unhappy. Unhealthy, yes, frequently, every full moon at that. But he never complained or showed that he thought life had given him an unfair hand. Sadie looked resolutely at the closed door. If he could do that, so could she.
Sadie got up and laid a hand on the door. Be strong, she told herself. You may be a werewolf, but you're still Sadie. She pushed the door open. Remus was there, along with Winsbree and Dumbledore. They looked up when she stepped into the room.
Sadie took a breath. "Hi."
Dumbledore smiled at her sadly. "Good morning, Sadie."
Remus smiled encouragingly and beckoned her over. "Professor Winsbree has already told us everything. You look okay, how do you feel?"
"As good as I'll ever be from now on," said Sadie, smiling wryly. Sadie looked earnestly at Dumbledore. "But what about Emma?"
"A search has already begun."
Sadie looked at him wildly. "Why didn't you call me? I need to go to, now!"
"Ms. Riddle, why ever would you want that? I would think you would be happy to return, safe from harm--"
Sadie shook her head. "Professor Dumbledore, I don't think you understand. Emma went out to look for me when I was neck deep in trouble. And now she's in trouble. Would it be right for me not to go to her?"
"Understandable, Ms. Riddle, but I think there is something that I do not think /you/ understand. Lord Voldemort is looking for you. It would be dangerous for you to even take a single step out the door."
Sadie looked weightily at Dumbledore. "My uncle is probably looking for me, but what if he finds /Emma?/"
Dumbledore looked into Sadie's eyes carefully. "Very well. I must stay here, but you may go with Professor Lupin as he was about to join the search party anyway."
Sadie nodded. "Thank you, Professor." She held out her hand. "In case I don't come back..."
Dumbledore took her hand in his and gave is a firm shake. "You will, Ms. Riddle, you will. But be careful nonetheless."
Sadie smiled and walked out of the room to prepare. Remus followed and caught up with her.
"Sadie, do you realize what you're doing? You're walking straight back into Voldemort's hands and I really don't think--"
Sadie spoke bitterly. "You sound like my father...or at least what my father would have sounded like, had he got the chance. I know what I'm doing Remus, even if /you/ don't know what I'm doing. Professor Dumbledore understands that I need to go, so at least pretend you do."
Remus took her by the shoulders and looked down on her, his eyes sad and serious. "Sadie, you can't change being a werewolf."
Sadie pushed his hands away. "So that's what you think this is about?" She closed her eyes and shook her head. She looked back up at him fighting tears. "She's my best friend. Without her, I don't have anything."
Remus smiled gently. "And without you, I don't have the daughter I didn't know I wanted."
Sadie looked at him blankly. "But werewolves can't have families...."
Remus held up a finger. "Ah, ah, ah...Not of non-lycanthropes. So what do you say?"
Sadie studied him with a new eye. "We'll talk after we find Emma," she walked off.
Remus smiled. "So there's no stopping you?" he called after her.
"Is there ever?" Sadie called over her shoulder as she turned the corner.
/He wants to be my father? But.would that be betraying my real father? I don't know him, sure, but if I could have, would he want me to give that title to someone else? Someone like Remus would make a good dad, no doubt, but./ Sadie's mind was spinning with such thoughts as she walked to the Common Room. She pulled on her trusty pair of sneakers. Sadie scoffed, remembering that Voldemort had mentioned them. She grabbed her cloak and braided her hair, and ran all the way down to the school entrance. As she expected, Remus was waiting there.
"Let's go," Sadie said to him resolutely putting on her cloak. He opened the door for her and followed her out. She headed directly towards the Forest. "I think we should head straight for the Forbidden Forest. Ten to one that's where she went, and knowing Emma she went in as straight of a line as possible and--"
Remus put an arm out to stop her. "Whoa, whoa, whoa, slow down. Let's not jump to conclusions here, it won't help anything."
Sadie took a heavy breath. "I just want to find her, Remus. Before anything happens to her, I want to find her."
"I know, but trampling through the Forest won't get us anywhere unless we have a plan."
"Professor Winsbree did it. Her only plan was to find me and get back to school."
Remus looked down on Sadie reprovingly. "And she almost got bit."
Sadie jumped up and down. "Oh, come /on/, Remus. We're scarier than a lot of the stuff in here," she whined.
Remus laughed. "You could be right. Ok, you convinced me. Let's go." Remus, his feet well trained, padded softly into the dark undergrowth. Sadie followed close behind.
It was several hours later that they stopped their steady march. Sadie had a dire stitch in her side, but had said nothing, only clutched it and grimaced. Remus had plucked a few grasses and such on the way and put them in his pocket. Now that they had stopped, he pulled them out again and handed some of them to Sadie.
"Chew on these. They'll keep you going for a while, but they're better as a potion."
Sadie took them warily. They had no flavor, but Sadie felt the pain in her side fade and the weariness in her feet subside. Remus had taken a seat on a fallen log and was looking thoughtfully into the gloom.
Sadie sat down beside him. "So, tell me.how--well, what made you decide that you wanted to adopt me? It's a big decision."
Remus smiled. "You remember going shopping and--"
Sadie laughed disbelievingly. "The pet lady???"
Remus nodded. "Yeah.and then you've always been such a good kid, very mature. You deserved a family. Then, there's the whole werewolf thing."
Sadie nodded, thinking.
Remus looked up through the foliage at the sky. "Well, I guess we ought to head off again. It's two-ish."
Sadie stood and looked up also. "How can you tell?"
Remus pointed at his wrist. "It's called a watch."
Sadie laughed embarrassedly and trudged into the woods, Remus at her side. Birds chattered nervously around them, leaves rustled uneasily. Sadie moved closer to Remus only half conscious that she did it. Remus laid a hand paternally on her shoulder. Sadie smiled up at him, and they lumbered ever onward into the oppressive dark surrounding them. It was several more hours before the trees thinned and ended completely. They emerged from the stifling wood at the foot of a gray hill and into the failing light. Remus and Sadie continued straight up it.
"At least--we'll--be able--to see more--when we get--to the top," huffed Sadie. When she reached the top, Sadie saw miles of rocky hills and broken ground. Near the horizon lay the vast, ominous castle.
"Well," Remus said, "there's no sign of the castle."
Sadie looked grim. "I see it."
Remus squinted at the distance. "Well.we can't do anything right now."
"Why?"
Remus didn't look at her. "Because the moon will be up in a few minutes." Sadie's blood chilled. "And I'll--".
/ "We'll. /"
Sadie paled and sat down. "Does--does it hurt?"
Remus smiled and crouched beside her. "What do you think the potion was for? No, it'll be just like being an Animagus. So don't worry, it's just hard to get used to at first."
Sadie nodded and slowed her breathing. Remus glanced up at the sky. "The moon's rising. It's better if you don't tense up."
. Sadie saw the sun dip under the sky and closed her eyes tight. She felt the soft moonlight find her. Her skin prickled as a deathly chill crept over it. Sadie put her arms over her head defensively and closed her eyes tight. Sadie felt like an old rubber band pulled nearly to breaking as her muscles swelled and her nose and mouth morphed into a doggish snout. Her jaw expanded and her teeth grew to canine ferocity. Her head tingled; whiskers sprouted and ears adjusted. Sadie's entire body tensed and changed. Then, suddenly, Sadie's mind went blank, like a page with nothing written on it. A hand lay on her shoulder.
"It's over."
Sadie looked up and saw a tan werewolf with familiar eyes. Remus gave her a hairy hand and helped her up. Sadie wiggled her clawed toes and felt her muzzle. Her hands shook a little as she touched her ears and found her tail. Remus stepped back. "Ready?"
"Yeah." She had barely said it when Remus tore off running. Sadie started to jog after him, but felt ridiculous and ran after him all the way to the next rocky outcropping. Remus panted, his tongue nearly lolling out. He looked up at the moon and howled, long and mournful.
"Beat /that,/" he dared proudly.
"I don't know how." Not that she really /wanted /to know. She was feeling wolfish quite enough already.
"Just fill your lungs and.well, yell with your mouth half closed."
Sadie looked skeptically at him but inhaled nonetheless. "Arrrooooooooarrrrraah."
Remus looked impressed. "Good.for a beginner." He looked up meditatively at the moon overhead. "Isn't the moon a funny thing? It's always changing.and, of course, it's what changes us. Even so, the moon really doesn't change; it's our view of it that does. It's always there, not a bright as the sun.but because of that, the fact that it's not as bright, we're more familiar with it, and we understand it more." Remus looked at her and smiled. "Sometimes we love it more, even if we're thankful for the life the sun gives us, and will always continue to give, and for what the moon doesn't give us." Sadie looked at him thoughtfully, relating what he had said to the good, kind man standing next to her. "Now, back to business. You go that way, and I'll go this way. If you find her, come tell me before you tackle her. Also, we don't know /who else is around,/ so don't talk. Remember, you're a werewolf."
"How could I forget?" Sadie skirted down the rocks.
***
/That's right, just wander aimlessly.go anywhere but the Forest./ Emma obeyed mindlessly. She still felt like she was floating and was unconscious of her surroundings and herself. Only the voice and its commands existed. She saw her surroundings with her body, but her mind, fully under Voldemort's control, did not register anything unless it was his order.
/Now turn east,/ the voice said presently. /It is time you went a little nearer to the searching party./ Obediently, Emma turned a bit to the left, and noticed the Forbidden Forest looming up in front of her. Momentary panic filled her, soothed only by the sound of the voice again--/don't worry. Nothing in the Forest will harm you while you are under my protection./ The voice seemed to chuckle pleasantly as it spoke, calming Emma like a thick down comforter on a December evening.
/You know,/said the voice after she had been walking for a few moments, /I pity you. There is great potential within you./ It paused, and then continued. /To have been taught all your life to disregard such potential./Emma could almost see the owner of the voice shaking his head sadly. /Now that is a pity indeed./
What do you mean? Emma asked, finding herself capable of responsive thought. The voice sighed. /How long,/ it asked, /have you attended Hogwarts School?/
Emma, forcing herself to think independently of the voice, was quiet for a moment. Then, Five years, she answered.
The voice sighed again. /I pity you,/ it repeated. /To have lived for so long being taught myths and untruths.for this do I pity you. For you know,/ it continued gently, /not everything they teach at Hogwarts is one hundred percent truthful./
It's not? Emma asked, trustingly.
/Of course not, said the voice with a sad little laugh. It never was.there used to be more truth in its teachings but this, alas, has now gone entirely./ It hesitated, then continued. /What have they told you concerning the Lord Voldemort, who they would label Dark Lord?/
He's--he's evil, replied Emma, groping for the right word. He's a Dark Lord. He was once a student at the school-
The voice sighed, cutting off her thought-reply. /I am very sorry,/ it said gently. /What I am about to say will seem very harsh to you. But I am afraid.it sighed again. I am afraid you have greatly been deceived. The Headmaster, Albus Dumbledore, is the one most to be feared. He is the real Dark Lord./
What--thought Emma, but the voice continued before she could make further protest.
/Long ago, Dumbledore was once a very good man. He taught at Hogwarts School--but he craved power. He was not satisfied with his position. He wanted more./
/Through the course of many years he studied dark arts, arts that would allow him to gain power beyond even his wildest dreams. He concealed his studies from his colleagues and his students--indeed, from the entirety of the wizarding world. At last, he found what he sought. He began to wreak all manner of terrible destruction upon the School--he let loose a hideous demon upon the students, a Basilisk. Realizing that he would soon be caught, he bewitched a student, and this student went to the current Headmaster and turned in another. It was a vile act, but it was not the fault of the student./
Who was the student, Emma asked.
/His name,/ replied the voice, /was Tom Riddle. He was brilliant--perhaps the most brilliant student ever to come to Hogwarts. And he was misled by Dumbledore, thinking him a good man. Dumbledore hated him for his brilliance, and after Tom Riddle had graduated from Hogwarts and other abhorrent occurrences began, Dumbledore laid the blame upon the Lord Voldemort, who he said was Tom Riddle come back in another form. It was all quite ridiculous--but it was believed./
Oh, how horrible, though Emma.
/Yes,/ replied the voice; then it was silent, and Emma was left to her own thoughts.
What the voice had told her had contradicted everything she'd ever learned. Could it be lying to her? No, she thought immediately; it would not lie. Then could it itself be deceived? No. The only plausible answer was that it was speaking the truth-
A long, mournful howl interrupted her train of thought, and she stopped, paralyzed with fear. Gooseflesh prickled along her arms. Her mouth opened in a scream, but the scream would not come-
Before her, at the head of an uncomfortably near hill, was a werewolf.
She stopped, forgetting everything: the voice, her troubled thoughts, the puzzling story the voice had told her. She backed up quickly, consequently hitting her spine hard against the gnarled bark of a large pine tree, her mouth still open in a silent scream.
After a moment, when the werewolf had not advanced further, she overcame some of her panic and began to study the beast. It looked smaller than a fully-grown werewolf; a child, then, but no less menacing. It had silver fur and a brooding, watchful expression, which did not comfort Emma any more than the howl had.
Suddenly it gave a short bark, and before Emma could react another werewolf came quickly into the clearing. This one was larger--an adult werewolf-- with tan-colored fur. It stopped, looked at Emma intently, and then, accompanied by the other, began to advance.
Sadie attempted to get her point across by nodding her head in the direction they would go, but Emma only stared, terrified and confused. Sighing inwardly, Sadie nudged her again--harder this time--and turned and began to walk in the direction of Hogwarts. Emma did not move, a puzzled expression on her face.
"Get behind her," Sadie called to Remus as she continued to trot towards the castle. "Maybe she'll come if you're behind her."
Remus fell in behind Emma. Emma slowly began to follow Sadie, the expression of confused fear not leaving her face--but at least she was following.
They walked along in this fashion for what must have been several hours before the trees around them began to thin. Sadie, relieved, ran forward to the edge of the wood and then stopped, waiting for Emma and Remus to catch up.
The castle, glowing faintly blue in the almost-dawn, was before them. A few spots of yellow light showed where sleepless teachers sat in their offices, waiting for the return of the people who had been sent out to search for Emma. Sadie, caught up in her own excitement, turned to make an excited comment to Remus, and stopped.
Emma stood, transfixed by the vision of the castle. As Sadie watched her, the surprised expression faded, replaced by a complacent, obedient one--and then this too left, and the expression on her face was one of intense inner pain.
The voice chuckled. /I could not have done it better myself,/ it said. /You did not even need the help of the searching party. Well-timed indeed, I might say./
Yes, thought Emma, her fear of the werewolves that had been present since her first sight of them fading. She sank again into the blissfully happy, semi-conscious state, living only for what the voice told her.
A light in the castle twinkled merrily. Emma watched it for a moment, and as she did so, the semi-consciousness began to fade. If the voice was telling the truth then this place, which had been a second home for five years, was a place of corruption and evil. As the light winked at her, innocent in its pureness, the thought in her mind surfaced-
It can't be evil.
It can't be.
/But it is./ said the voice, a note of sad yet firm assurance in it. /It is./
It's not, she thought defiantly. It's good.
/Stop it!/ said the voice, suddenly angry. A spasm of pain--not pain, exactly, but something quite as intense and unpleasant--shot through her as it spoke. /Listen to me!/
No, thought Emma, but she was weakening. Then, It's a place of light. Good. Not evil. And--and Professor Dumbledore isn't evil either.
/Listen!/ screeched the voice. /You cannot defy me! You are under my command--listen--listen-/
No, thought Emma stolidly. It's good. Hogwarts is good. The teachings are good. Professor Dumbledore is good.
The voice was suddenly silent, and Emma relaxed.
/You are still in my power,/ it said suddenly.
But I don't want to be, Emma protested, much as a small child would protest going to bed.
The voice gave a small chuckle. /I am afraid,/ it said, /that you do not have much choice./
***
/Ask her about her uncle,/ Tom--Voldemort--prompted. Emma turned to Sadie, willing herself to stop even as she did so. What, she thought suddenly, if she were to speak as if under a lot of pressure? Maybe she could get the message to Sadie not to listen to her, not to trust her any more...
/Act natural,/ came the next command with lightning swiftness. Emma sighed inwardly.
"So, Sadie, what do you think about your uncle?" Emma asked, hoping Sadie would wonder how Emma knew about Riddle.
"Wha--oh, him," Sadie answered, trying to remember if she'd told Emma about her experience with Tom and Professor Winsbree or not. She guessed she had; otherwise how would Emma have known? "I don't know," she replied carelessly. "It's pretty obvious what I think of him, isn't it?"
Emma screamed inside herself, and heard only a satisfied laugh from her invisible captor. "Oh," she said.
/Ask her why she left,/ Riddle persisted.
"So...uh...how come you left?"
Sadie stared this time, and Emma hoped she realized the absurdity of the questions she was asking before it was too late.
"Earth to Emma," Sadie said after a moment, lightening up as if Emma were only joking. But I'm not joking, Emma thought desperately. Like this is a joke. "You really have to ask why? He's the most evil wizard of our time," Sadie continued, "And he killed--" she hesitated. "Lots of people's parents," she finished lamely.
"Oh," said Emma again. "Sadie--" she broke in urgently, before the voice inside of her could issue any more commands, "There's something you should know--"
/STOP!/ Tom screeched. /You idiot, what do you think you were doing?/
I don't know, Emma thought miserably. Trying to save myself and everyone else here.
Riddle laughed. /Good try,/ he said complacently. /Tell her that you missed her while she was gone./ He laughed again.
"What?" Sadie asked, giving Emma a strange look.
"I, uh, missed you," said Emma quietly.
"Oh," said Sadie, a bit confused. Then she added, hesitantly, "Emma--are you all right?"
Of course I am not all right! Emma screamed inside. A cold laugh greeted her silent scream. /Reply that you are feeling a bit tired,/ Tom instructed.
"I'm fine," Emma said miserably. "Just a bit tired...I guess."
"So...am I bothering you?" Sadie asked suddenly.
Emma shook her head wordlessly. No, you're not bothering me, she thought. It's me that will be doing the bothering...the voice inside her laughed.
You still haven't told me why you've--you know, Emma told the voice. Pretty stupid idea, if you ask me--whatever it is.
The voice chuckled. /I should think that it would be obvious even to you./
Well, it's not, Emma replied rebelliously. She was staring away from Sadie, into the crackling fire that was always burning in the common room. Suddenly an image began to materialize within it--a perfect, flaming replica of Hogwarts Castle. A large, winged shape flew over it and then melted back into the flames--two miniscule fiery students walked across the orange grounds.
"Sadie, the fire!" she gasped after a moment. Sadie, somewhat alarmed turned toward the fireplace--and then back to Emma, nonplussed.
"What about it?" she said. "Emma, are you sure you're all right?"
No! Emma wanted to shout at her. No! I'm not all right! I'm the prisoner of a man living probably twenty or so miles away, I can't communicate with my best friend, and on top of all that, /I'm hallucinating./ No, I am not alright!!!
Tom laughed again. /It wasn't a hallucination,/ he said mildly. /It was an explanation./
An explanation of what, Emma asked crossly.
/Tell Sadie that you feel fine,/ Tom instructed, ignoring her query.
"I'm fine," said Emma, a little of her resentment carrying into her voice. Sadie raised her eyebrows, but didn't comment.
/About the fire,/ said the voice after a moment. /It was a minor illusion. Basic enchantment. I am sure that you, Miss Walker, could easily do the same./
Yes, but I didn't do it, said Emma. And there's no one else in the common room. And don't tell me that Sadie did it, because she couldn't even /see/ it.
/I did it,/ replied Tom complacently.
What--? thought Emma. You can't--I've studied this stuff-- enchantments, especially basic ones, have limits--you can't perform them in another /room,/ even, much less another building in a completely different place.
She could almost hear the amused smile in Riddle's voice as he spoke again. /I did it through you,/ he said simply. /You study well, Miss Walker--it is true that spells have definite boundaries. But there is also another truth, which I doubt you have learned yet. While they will not work outside of boundaries independently, spells of any degree can work through a second person. You./
Oh, said Emma, unsure of what else to say.
/Thus,/ continued Voldemort, /do I plan to enter Hogwarts. Through you--by far the most faithful helper I have come across yet, and not even "on my side"./ He gave a short, cold laugh. /Through you I can breach the spells of protection guarding Hogwarts. Then I will be free to enter easily. Sadly, you will no longer be of use to me. It is unfortunate when things work out in such a way./
Goosebumps broke out on Emma's arms, and she could no longer feel the heat of the fire. Inside her, the voice gave a quiet laugh, but did not speak further.
"Sadie," she said abruptly, "I'm going upstairs to--to get my Transfiguration textbook."
"It's right in front of you," said Sadie, pointing.
"Oh, yeah," Emma said, hoping her voice would hold, "I meant my--my Charms textbook."
"Okay, I'll come with," said Sadie brightly, jumping up. "There's so much still I want to talk to you about--you haven't told me about /anything/ that happened to you--"
/The alibi./ Riddle's voice cut through Emma's thoughts. /Don't forget it./
I won't, said Emma. How /could/ she, as Tom'd been drilling her in the false story ever since she'd arrived back at Hogwarts.
"Yeah, I know," said Emma, forcing brightness into her tone. She started towards the staircase that led to the girls' dormitories.
Sadie scrambled after, passed her friend, and confronted her.
"Emma, really, something's wrong. Why won't you talk to me?"
Emma ducked around Sadie. Can't you see I /want/ to talk to you? She cried voicelessly. Riddle gave a cold laugh. /Tell her to leave you alone,/ he said, cruelly amused.
"Just leave me alone," Emma snapped, the combination of her own inner struggle and the words she had to say making it harsher than it should have been.
Sadie continued to follow Emma, and laid a hand on her shoulder. "Really--if there's anything I've done--"
"Its not--" Emma began, but Riddle's irritated voice broke through her own. /Tell her it _is_ her fault,/ he commanded. /We cannot have her suspicions roused./
"Just back off, okay?" Emma said irritatedly. She was irritated, not with Sadie, but with Tom--and /more/ than irritated. She could safely say that she /hated/ the voice within her. "I--I don't feel like talking right now."
"If you're sure," said Sadie dubiously, hurt evident in her voice and eyes.
Emma turned around and watched Sadie go slowly back down the stairs, wanting to call out to her, to make her come back, to tell her everything-
/That is impossible,/ spat the voice, /and you know it./
Just /you/ leave me alone, Emma thought viciously. The voice chuckled, but subsided.
Emma continued to walk up the stairs slowly, pausing on each step, until she reached the door to the fifth-year girls' dormitory. Slowly, she pushed open the door and slowly, she went in, glad it was empty. She stood in the doorway for a moment and then walked over to her bed, sat down, pulled the curtains, and cried.
*** Emma coughed wretchedly, again.
"Emma, are you ok?"
/Tell her it's just a bad cough./
"It's just a bad cough," Emma replied despairingly.
"Oh." Sadie studied her for a moment, thinking. Then, "You haven't done your therapy recently, have you?"
"No," she said quickly, before the voice could think a nonchalant response.
Sadie looked at her like she was speaking Vietnamese. "/Why?/"
/Tell her you've been forgetting./ "I keep forgetting," Emma said robotically.
"But you've done it since forever." Sadie said, even more confused.
/Snap at her! Say it's none of her business, and to leave you alone and stop asking questions!/
"It's none of your business! Stop asking questions and leave me alone!" Emma barked. But her eyes betrayed her voice. A tear rolled down her cheek and for a brief moment, Sadie saw how tortured she was, even though she hadn't a clue why.
The voice spoke again venomously. /Now back away from her. Find somewhere where you won't be disturbed./ Emma could feel him scowling down at her. /You have some explaining to do./
Emma stepped back and shook her head slowly, hopelessly, Sadie thought, and ran out of the Common Room. Sadie sat down numbly. Something was definitely wrong.
First thing in the morning, Sadie went to Madam Pomfrey to ask her to make sure Emma went to therapy. But when she got there, Emma was already there, mouthpiece in use. She took it out and called to her over the din, "I just didn't want to care about my CF this past week, that's all. But Madam Pomfrey says it's not healthy." Emma stuck it back in gloomily and turned her back to the door. Sadie stepped out and walked slowly back down the hall.
"That's not what she wanted to say." she muttered to herself. She bolted down the hall, a resolute look on her face. She didn't stop running until she reached Dumbledore, in the Great Hall.
"Professor Dumbledore," she gasped, clutching a stitch, "you've got to talk to Emma."
Dumbledore looked surprised, but concerned. "Ms. Riddle, calm down. Professor McGonagall, will you please keep order here while I speak to Ms. Riddle?"
"Yes, Headmaster."
Dumbledore led Sadie out of the Hall and into a nearby room. "Now, Ms. Riddle, why are you so distressed?"
"It's Emma, Professor. Something's not right. She hasn't been the same since we brought her back. She's not done /any/ of her therapy, I'm not sure she's even taken her enzymes. You know how well she always takes care of herself. And plus she just hasn't been herself /at all./ I can't explain but.something-Sir, something's killing her. I can see it in her eyes."
Dumbledore looked deeply uneasy. "Would you please accompany me to the hospital wing, Ms. Riddle?"
They strode to the hospital wing and found Emma just leaving. "Ms. Walker, please come with me to my office. Hope shone in her eyes for a moment until she replied animatedly, "I've got to go eat breakfast, if it takes too long I'll miss class, I've got to go to the bathroom, I don't trust you anymore, I'll hurt myself if you make me-"
Dumbledore laid a hand on her shoulder. "That's quite enough," he said quietly, "Now /hush/."
Emma looked frightened-no, /Emma/ did not look frightened, but something about her conveyed fear. Dumbledore, keeping his hand firmly on her shoulder, and with Sadie trailing behind, took them to his office. Not breaking contact with Emma, he took a strange device out of his desk: a stone tablet with thirteen glass balls-12 smaller ones encircling a larger one-with some swirling yellow gas inside. He touched his free hand on the largest one.
"Friends, we need a quorum." The air whispered twelve confirmatory replies. In minutes Professors Snape, McGonagall, Flitwick, Winsbree, Sprout, Sinistra, Binns, Vector, and Brodeur, and Madams Pomfrey, Pince, and Hooch were all gathered in the office with grave, curious expressions.
Dumbledore addressed them. "I have reason to believe that Emma Walker has been placed under the Imperious Curse by Lord Voldemort." Emma went to run, but Dumbledore strengthened his grip. "To counter it, I must also perform the Imperious Curse. As you well know, it is strictly illegal for me to do so, and so I have called a quorum of lawfully upstanding individuals for exemption. Say 'Aye' if you feel the case must be handled as such." Each, more sober than the last, concurred. "Very well. Minerva, please lock the door." She did so and Dumbledore let go of Emma. She drew her wand.
"I will use this, Albus," Emma spat vituperatively in a voice not her own.
Dumbledore inhaled sharply and Sadie saw him as she had never seen him before-not a kindly, worn old man, but an imposing, learned sorcerer, exuding power and wisdom. He boomed "IMPERIO!" and Emma put her hands to her head and shrieked; an immense struggle for her mind was tearing her head in two. Then, like a lightning flash, Emma dropped her arms and looked around with a frightened, blank expresion. She collapsed to the floor.
Dumbledore's shoulders sagged and he looked deathly weary. "Madam Pomfrey, will you please take her to the hospital wing until she recovers? You may stay with her Miss Riddle. Thank you for coming so quickly, my associates, but now I must ask you to take leave. I have not strength.to entertain company." Dumbledore's voice faded. He stepped laboriously to his adjoining quarters. "He has grown stronger," he murmured, and shut the door behind him.
"Come Sadie," Madam Pomfrey called from the door. Emma was just outside on a floating stretcher. Sadie glanced at the door Dumbledore had left through again and left with Pomfrey, guiding Emma's stretcher and thanking a Higher Being for His support that day.
***
Emma woke the next morning to find herself in a bed in the hospital wing. Sadie was sitting in a chair nearby, A Guide to Advanced Divination across her lap. A look of intense concentration was on her face; Emma didn't feel like calling out to her yet.
Her head hurt a little, a dull, throbbing pain. Her hands stung too-- scratches from running headlong through the Forbidden Forest stood out in slim red welts on them. Her midnight run through the Forest seemed like such a long time ago--and everything that had ensued. Riddle, the Imperius Curse, the werewolves, Dumbledore--they all seemed like distant memories, memories from some other lifetime that had happened long years ago.
With a sigh she lay back on the pillow. Sadie, startled, looked up; with a broad smile she noticed that Emma was awake and scooted her chair nearer the bed, letting Advanced Divination fall unheeded to the floor.
"Emma! You're awake!" she said, obviously pleased. "I've been waiting for ages--I came here as soon as I woke up this morning--Professor Dumbledore said it was all right if I skipped Magical Linguistics and Herbology--,"
Emma stifled a yawn. "What time is it?" she asked. "Did I sleep that long?"
"Nearly ten-thirty," Sadie replied. "Hang on, Emma--I promised I'd tell Madam Pomfrey when you woke up--," she stood and began to walk away from Emma's bed, but returned almost immediately.
"No need," said Madam Pomfrey, coming into view. She carried a nebulizer in one hand and balanced a breakfast tray in the other; both she set down on the table beside Emma's bed.
"Nebulizer first, then breakfast," she instructed. Emma promptly snatched the mouthpiece off the table and held it up, looking intently at the bottom. Before Sadie could ask what she was doing, she had grabbed hold of a thin clear-plastic tube and was pulling it slowly from the nebulizer. She continued pulling until a tube about three and a half feet in length dangled from underneath the nebulizer; she handed the opposite end of the tube to Madam Pomfrey. The nurse pushed a small, six-by-four inch panel in the wall, which slid aside to reveal a small hole which was gustily blowing out air. Madam Pomfrey pushed the tube onto this, and immediately a fine mist began to come out of the mouthpiece in Emma's hand.
"Call me when you're done," said Madam Pomfrey, eyeing Emma sternly. "This morning's therapy will have to be extra-good to make up for a week of neglect."
Emma stifled a laugh and nodded. When Madam Pomfrey had gone, she raised an eyebrow at Sadie. "Neglect?" she asked, talking thickly through the mouthpiece. "I wouldn't quite call it that."
"I dunno," said Sadie. "She has a point, you know."
"Sadie, I'm really, really sorry," said Emma, abruptly changing the subject. She gave a short, hard sigh, sending a smoke-ring of albuterol mist out the other end of the nebulizer. "I acted horribly. To you. To everyone. But mostly you."
"It wasn't your fault," said Sadie awkwardly. "I mean, I hardly think anyone's going to blame you for it--,"
"That's not what I care about," said Emma. "I didn't mean to, but--," she gave a tiny smile. "I'm just sorry."
"Really, its okay," Sadie assured her. "I know that you didn't mean it--I mean, come on, you were hurting at least as much as I was, weren't you?"
Emma gave a small nod and looked down at the white sheet.
Regardless of the nebulizer, Sadie reached forward and put her arms around her friend. "Really, its okay," she said. "I'm glad you're back."
"Me too," Emma smiled tearfully. "Me too.
Sadie stayed in bed for some hours, feeling sorry for herself and hating everyone.
/If Voldemort hadn't killed my parents none of this would have ever happened...If Emma hadn't run away I wouldn't be all by myself...If Winsbree hadn't brought me to Voldemort, I would be in class right now, chatting with Emma...If Remus hadn't--/Sadie faltered and searched her mind for something Remus had done. But there wasn't anything. He'd always been a role-model to her, easy to talk to, happy to give advice, understood where she was coming from...Sadie frowned. More so than ever now, now that she was a werewolf too. Sadie furrowed her brow. And yet, she had never seen him bitter, or even unhappy. Unhealthy, yes, frequently, every full moon at that. But he never complained or showed that he thought life had given him an unfair hand. Sadie looked resolutely at the closed door. If he could do that, so could she.
Sadie got up and laid a hand on the door. Be strong, she told herself. You may be a werewolf, but you're still Sadie. She pushed the door open. Remus was there, along with Winsbree and Dumbledore. They looked up when she stepped into the room.
Sadie took a breath. "Hi."
Dumbledore smiled at her sadly. "Good morning, Sadie."
Remus smiled encouragingly and beckoned her over. "Professor Winsbree has already told us everything. You look okay, how do you feel?"
"As good as I'll ever be from now on," said Sadie, smiling wryly. Sadie looked earnestly at Dumbledore. "But what about Emma?"
"A search has already begun."
Sadie looked at him wildly. "Why didn't you call me? I need to go to, now!"
"Ms. Riddle, why ever would you want that? I would think you would be happy to return, safe from harm--"
Sadie shook her head. "Professor Dumbledore, I don't think you understand. Emma went out to look for me when I was neck deep in trouble. And now she's in trouble. Would it be right for me not to go to her?"
"Understandable, Ms. Riddle, but I think there is something that I do not think /you/ understand. Lord Voldemort is looking for you. It would be dangerous for you to even take a single step out the door."
Sadie looked weightily at Dumbledore. "My uncle is probably looking for me, but what if he finds /Emma?/"
Dumbledore looked into Sadie's eyes carefully. "Very well. I must stay here, but you may go with Professor Lupin as he was about to join the search party anyway."
Sadie nodded. "Thank you, Professor." She held out her hand. "In case I don't come back..."
Dumbledore took her hand in his and gave is a firm shake. "You will, Ms. Riddle, you will. But be careful nonetheless."
Sadie smiled and walked out of the room to prepare. Remus followed and caught up with her.
"Sadie, do you realize what you're doing? You're walking straight back into Voldemort's hands and I really don't think--"
Sadie spoke bitterly. "You sound like my father...or at least what my father would have sounded like, had he got the chance. I know what I'm doing Remus, even if /you/ don't know what I'm doing. Professor Dumbledore understands that I need to go, so at least pretend you do."
Remus took her by the shoulders and looked down on her, his eyes sad and serious. "Sadie, you can't change being a werewolf."
Sadie pushed his hands away. "So that's what you think this is about?" She closed her eyes and shook her head. She looked back up at him fighting tears. "She's my best friend. Without her, I don't have anything."
Remus smiled gently. "And without you, I don't have the daughter I didn't know I wanted."
Sadie looked at him blankly. "But werewolves can't have families...."
Remus held up a finger. "Ah, ah, ah...Not of non-lycanthropes. So what do you say?"
Sadie studied him with a new eye. "We'll talk after we find Emma," she walked off.
Remus smiled. "So there's no stopping you?" he called after her.
"Is there ever?" Sadie called over her shoulder as she turned the corner.
/He wants to be my father? But.would that be betraying my real father? I don't know him, sure, but if I could have, would he want me to give that title to someone else? Someone like Remus would make a good dad, no doubt, but./ Sadie's mind was spinning with such thoughts as she walked to the Common Room. She pulled on her trusty pair of sneakers. Sadie scoffed, remembering that Voldemort had mentioned them. She grabbed her cloak and braided her hair, and ran all the way down to the school entrance. As she expected, Remus was waiting there.
"Let's go," Sadie said to him resolutely putting on her cloak. He opened the door for her and followed her out. She headed directly towards the Forest. "I think we should head straight for the Forbidden Forest. Ten to one that's where she went, and knowing Emma she went in as straight of a line as possible and--"
Remus put an arm out to stop her. "Whoa, whoa, whoa, slow down. Let's not jump to conclusions here, it won't help anything."
Sadie took a heavy breath. "I just want to find her, Remus. Before anything happens to her, I want to find her."
"I know, but trampling through the Forest won't get us anywhere unless we have a plan."
"Professor Winsbree did it. Her only plan was to find me and get back to school."
Remus looked down on Sadie reprovingly. "And she almost got bit."
Sadie jumped up and down. "Oh, come /on/, Remus. We're scarier than a lot of the stuff in here," she whined.
Remus laughed. "You could be right. Ok, you convinced me. Let's go." Remus, his feet well trained, padded softly into the dark undergrowth. Sadie followed close behind.
It was several hours later that they stopped their steady march. Sadie had a dire stitch in her side, but had said nothing, only clutched it and grimaced. Remus had plucked a few grasses and such on the way and put them in his pocket. Now that they had stopped, he pulled them out again and handed some of them to Sadie.
"Chew on these. They'll keep you going for a while, but they're better as a potion."
Sadie took them warily. They had no flavor, but Sadie felt the pain in her side fade and the weariness in her feet subside. Remus had taken a seat on a fallen log and was looking thoughtfully into the gloom.
Sadie sat down beside him. "So, tell me.how--well, what made you decide that you wanted to adopt me? It's a big decision."
Remus smiled. "You remember going shopping and--"
Sadie laughed disbelievingly. "The pet lady???"
Remus nodded. "Yeah.and then you've always been such a good kid, very mature. You deserved a family. Then, there's the whole werewolf thing."
Sadie nodded, thinking.
Remus looked up through the foliage at the sky. "Well, I guess we ought to head off again. It's two-ish."
Sadie stood and looked up also. "How can you tell?"
Remus pointed at his wrist. "It's called a watch."
Sadie laughed embarrassedly and trudged into the woods, Remus at her side. Birds chattered nervously around them, leaves rustled uneasily. Sadie moved closer to Remus only half conscious that she did it. Remus laid a hand paternally on her shoulder. Sadie smiled up at him, and they lumbered ever onward into the oppressive dark surrounding them. It was several more hours before the trees thinned and ended completely. They emerged from the stifling wood at the foot of a gray hill and into the failing light. Remus and Sadie continued straight up it.
"At least--we'll--be able--to see more--when we get--to the top," huffed Sadie. When she reached the top, Sadie saw miles of rocky hills and broken ground. Near the horizon lay the vast, ominous castle.
"Well," Remus said, "there's no sign of the castle."
Sadie looked grim. "I see it."
Remus squinted at the distance. "Well.we can't do anything right now."
"Why?"
Remus didn't look at her. "Because the moon will be up in a few minutes." Sadie's blood chilled. "And I'll--".
/ "We'll. /"
Sadie paled and sat down. "Does--does it hurt?"
Remus smiled and crouched beside her. "What do you think the potion was for? No, it'll be just like being an Animagus. So don't worry, it's just hard to get used to at first."
Sadie nodded and slowed her breathing. Remus glanced up at the sky. "The moon's rising. It's better if you don't tense up."
. Sadie saw the sun dip under the sky and closed her eyes tight. She felt the soft moonlight find her. Her skin prickled as a deathly chill crept over it. Sadie put her arms over her head defensively and closed her eyes tight. Sadie felt like an old rubber band pulled nearly to breaking as her muscles swelled and her nose and mouth morphed into a doggish snout. Her jaw expanded and her teeth grew to canine ferocity. Her head tingled; whiskers sprouted and ears adjusted. Sadie's entire body tensed and changed. Then, suddenly, Sadie's mind went blank, like a page with nothing written on it. A hand lay on her shoulder.
"It's over."
Sadie looked up and saw a tan werewolf with familiar eyes. Remus gave her a hairy hand and helped her up. Sadie wiggled her clawed toes and felt her muzzle. Her hands shook a little as she touched her ears and found her tail. Remus stepped back. "Ready?"
"Yeah." She had barely said it when Remus tore off running. Sadie started to jog after him, but felt ridiculous and ran after him all the way to the next rocky outcropping. Remus panted, his tongue nearly lolling out. He looked up at the moon and howled, long and mournful.
"Beat /that,/" he dared proudly.
"I don't know how." Not that she really /wanted /to know. She was feeling wolfish quite enough already.
"Just fill your lungs and.well, yell with your mouth half closed."
Sadie looked skeptically at him but inhaled nonetheless. "Arrrooooooooarrrrraah."
Remus looked impressed. "Good.for a beginner." He looked up meditatively at the moon overhead. "Isn't the moon a funny thing? It's always changing.and, of course, it's what changes us. Even so, the moon really doesn't change; it's our view of it that does. It's always there, not a bright as the sun.but because of that, the fact that it's not as bright, we're more familiar with it, and we understand it more." Remus looked at her and smiled. "Sometimes we love it more, even if we're thankful for the life the sun gives us, and will always continue to give, and for what the moon doesn't give us." Sadie looked at him thoughtfully, relating what he had said to the good, kind man standing next to her. "Now, back to business. You go that way, and I'll go this way. If you find her, come tell me before you tackle her. Also, we don't know /who else is around,/ so don't talk. Remember, you're a werewolf."
"How could I forget?" Sadie skirted down the rocks.
***
/That's right, just wander aimlessly.go anywhere but the Forest./ Emma obeyed mindlessly. She still felt like she was floating and was unconscious of her surroundings and herself. Only the voice and its commands existed. She saw her surroundings with her body, but her mind, fully under Voldemort's control, did not register anything unless it was his order.
/Now turn east,/ the voice said presently. /It is time you went a little nearer to the searching party./ Obediently, Emma turned a bit to the left, and noticed the Forbidden Forest looming up in front of her. Momentary panic filled her, soothed only by the sound of the voice again--/don't worry. Nothing in the Forest will harm you while you are under my protection./ The voice seemed to chuckle pleasantly as it spoke, calming Emma like a thick down comforter on a December evening.
/You know,/said the voice after she had been walking for a few moments, /I pity you. There is great potential within you./ It paused, and then continued. /To have been taught all your life to disregard such potential./Emma could almost see the owner of the voice shaking his head sadly. /Now that is a pity indeed./
What do you mean? Emma asked, finding herself capable of responsive thought. The voice sighed. /How long,/ it asked, /have you attended Hogwarts School?/
Emma, forcing herself to think independently of the voice, was quiet for a moment. Then, Five years, she answered.
The voice sighed again. /I pity you,/ it repeated. /To have lived for so long being taught myths and untruths.for this do I pity you. For you know,/ it continued gently, /not everything they teach at Hogwarts is one hundred percent truthful./
It's not? Emma asked, trustingly.
/Of course not, said the voice with a sad little laugh. It never was.there used to be more truth in its teachings but this, alas, has now gone entirely./ It hesitated, then continued. /What have they told you concerning the Lord Voldemort, who they would label Dark Lord?/
He's--he's evil, replied Emma, groping for the right word. He's a Dark Lord. He was once a student at the school-
The voice sighed, cutting off her thought-reply. /I am very sorry,/ it said gently. /What I am about to say will seem very harsh to you. But I am afraid.it sighed again. I am afraid you have greatly been deceived. The Headmaster, Albus Dumbledore, is the one most to be feared. He is the real Dark Lord./
What--thought Emma, but the voice continued before she could make further protest.
/Long ago, Dumbledore was once a very good man. He taught at Hogwarts School--but he craved power. He was not satisfied with his position. He wanted more./
/Through the course of many years he studied dark arts, arts that would allow him to gain power beyond even his wildest dreams. He concealed his studies from his colleagues and his students--indeed, from the entirety of the wizarding world. At last, he found what he sought. He began to wreak all manner of terrible destruction upon the School--he let loose a hideous demon upon the students, a Basilisk. Realizing that he would soon be caught, he bewitched a student, and this student went to the current Headmaster and turned in another. It was a vile act, but it was not the fault of the student./
Who was the student, Emma asked.
/His name,/ replied the voice, /was Tom Riddle. He was brilliant--perhaps the most brilliant student ever to come to Hogwarts. And he was misled by Dumbledore, thinking him a good man. Dumbledore hated him for his brilliance, and after Tom Riddle had graduated from Hogwarts and other abhorrent occurrences began, Dumbledore laid the blame upon the Lord Voldemort, who he said was Tom Riddle come back in another form. It was all quite ridiculous--but it was believed./
Oh, how horrible, though Emma.
/Yes,/ replied the voice; then it was silent, and Emma was left to her own thoughts.
What the voice had told her had contradicted everything she'd ever learned. Could it be lying to her? No, she thought immediately; it would not lie. Then could it itself be deceived? No. The only plausible answer was that it was speaking the truth-
A long, mournful howl interrupted her train of thought, and she stopped, paralyzed with fear. Gooseflesh prickled along her arms. Her mouth opened in a scream, but the scream would not come-
Before her, at the head of an uncomfortably near hill, was a werewolf.
She stopped, forgetting everything: the voice, her troubled thoughts, the puzzling story the voice had told her. She backed up quickly, consequently hitting her spine hard against the gnarled bark of a large pine tree, her mouth still open in a silent scream.
After a moment, when the werewolf had not advanced further, she overcame some of her panic and began to study the beast. It looked smaller than a fully-grown werewolf; a child, then, but no less menacing. It had silver fur and a brooding, watchful expression, which did not comfort Emma any more than the howl had.
Suddenly it gave a short bark, and before Emma could react another werewolf came quickly into the clearing. This one was larger--an adult werewolf-- with tan-colored fur. It stopped, looked at Emma intently, and then, accompanied by the other, began to advance.
Sadie attempted to get her point across by nodding her head in the direction they would go, but Emma only stared, terrified and confused. Sighing inwardly, Sadie nudged her again--harder this time--and turned and began to walk in the direction of Hogwarts. Emma did not move, a puzzled expression on her face.
"Get behind her," Sadie called to Remus as she continued to trot towards the castle. "Maybe she'll come if you're behind her."
Remus fell in behind Emma. Emma slowly began to follow Sadie, the expression of confused fear not leaving her face--but at least she was following.
They walked along in this fashion for what must have been several hours before the trees around them began to thin. Sadie, relieved, ran forward to the edge of the wood and then stopped, waiting for Emma and Remus to catch up.
The castle, glowing faintly blue in the almost-dawn, was before them. A few spots of yellow light showed where sleepless teachers sat in their offices, waiting for the return of the people who had been sent out to search for Emma. Sadie, caught up in her own excitement, turned to make an excited comment to Remus, and stopped.
Emma stood, transfixed by the vision of the castle. As Sadie watched her, the surprised expression faded, replaced by a complacent, obedient one--and then this too left, and the expression on her face was one of intense inner pain.
The voice chuckled. /I could not have done it better myself,/ it said. /You did not even need the help of the searching party. Well-timed indeed, I might say./
Yes, thought Emma, her fear of the werewolves that had been present since her first sight of them fading. She sank again into the blissfully happy, semi-conscious state, living only for what the voice told her.
A light in the castle twinkled merrily. Emma watched it for a moment, and as she did so, the semi-consciousness began to fade. If the voice was telling the truth then this place, which had been a second home for five years, was a place of corruption and evil. As the light winked at her, innocent in its pureness, the thought in her mind surfaced-
It can't be evil.
It can't be.
/But it is./ said the voice, a note of sad yet firm assurance in it. /It is./
It's not, she thought defiantly. It's good.
/Stop it!/ said the voice, suddenly angry. A spasm of pain--not pain, exactly, but something quite as intense and unpleasant--shot through her as it spoke. /Listen to me!/
No, thought Emma, but she was weakening. Then, It's a place of light. Good. Not evil. And--and Professor Dumbledore isn't evil either.
/Listen!/ screeched the voice. /You cannot defy me! You are under my command--listen--listen-/
No, thought Emma stolidly. It's good. Hogwarts is good. The teachings are good. Professor Dumbledore is good.
The voice was suddenly silent, and Emma relaxed.
/You are still in my power,/ it said suddenly.
But I don't want to be, Emma protested, much as a small child would protest going to bed.
The voice gave a small chuckle. /I am afraid,/ it said, /that you do not have much choice./
***
/Ask her about her uncle,/ Tom--Voldemort--prompted. Emma turned to Sadie, willing herself to stop even as she did so. What, she thought suddenly, if she were to speak as if under a lot of pressure? Maybe she could get the message to Sadie not to listen to her, not to trust her any more...
/Act natural,/ came the next command with lightning swiftness. Emma sighed inwardly.
"So, Sadie, what do you think about your uncle?" Emma asked, hoping Sadie would wonder how Emma knew about Riddle.
"Wha--oh, him," Sadie answered, trying to remember if she'd told Emma about her experience with Tom and Professor Winsbree or not. She guessed she had; otherwise how would Emma have known? "I don't know," she replied carelessly. "It's pretty obvious what I think of him, isn't it?"
Emma screamed inside herself, and heard only a satisfied laugh from her invisible captor. "Oh," she said.
/Ask her why she left,/ Riddle persisted.
"So...uh...how come you left?"
Sadie stared this time, and Emma hoped she realized the absurdity of the questions she was asking before it was too late.
"Earth to Emma," Sadie said after a moment, lightening up as if Emma were only joking. But I'm not joking, Emma thought desperately. Like this is a joke. "You really have to ask why? He's the most evil wizard of our time," Sadie continued, "And he killed--" she hesitated. "Lots of people's parents," she finished lamely.
"Oh," said Emma again. "Sadie--" she broke in urgently, before the voice inside of her could issue any more commands, "There's something you should know--"
/STOP!/ Tom screeched. /You idiot, what do you think you were doing?/
I don't know, Emma thought miserably. Trying to save myself and everyone else here.
Riddle laughed. /Good try,/ he said complacently. /Tell her that you missed her while she was gone./ He laughed again.
"What?" Sadie asked, giving Emma a strange look.
"I, uh, missed you," said Emma quietly.
"Oh," said Sadie, a bit confused. Then she added, hesitantly, "Emma--are you all right?"
Of course I am not all right! Emma screamed inside. A cold laugh greeted her silent scream. /Reply that you are feeling a bit tired,/ Tom instructed.
"I'm fine," Emma said miserably. "Just a bit tired...I guess."
"So...am I bothering you?" Sadie asked suddenly.
Emma shook her head wordlessly. No, you're not bothering me, she thought. It's me that will be doing the bothering...the voice inside her laughed.
You still haven't told me why you've--you know, Emma told the voice. Pretty stupid idea, if you ask me--whatever it is.
The voice chuckled. /I should think that it would be obvious even to you./
Well, it's not, Emma replied rebelliously. She was staring away from Sadie, into the crackling fire that was always burning in the common room. Suddenly an image began to materialize within it--a perfect, flaming replica of Hogwarts Castle. A large, winged shape flew over it and then melted back into the flames--two miniscule fiery students walked across the orange grounds.
"Sadie, the fire!" she gasped after a moment. Sadie, somewhat alarmed turned toward the fireplace--and then back to Emma, nonplussed.
"What about it?" she said. "Emma, are you sure you're all right?"
No! Emma wanted to shout at her. No! I'm not all right! I'm the prisoner of a man living probably twenty or so miles away, I can't communicate with my best friend, and on top of all that, /I'm hallucinating./ No, I am not alright!!!
Tom laughed again. /It wasn't a hallucination,/ he said mildly. /It was an explanation./
An explanation of what, Emma asked crossly.
/Tell Sadie that you feel fine,/ Tom instructed, ignoring her query.
"I'm fine," said Emma, a little of her resentment carrying into her voice. Sadie raised her eyebrows, but didn't comment.
/About the fire,/ said the voice after a moment. /It was a minor illusion. Basic enchantment. I am sure that you, Miss Walker, could easily do the same./
Yes, but I didn't do it, said Emma. And there's no one else in the common room. And don't tell me that Sadie did it, because she couldn't even /see/ it.
/I did it,/ replied Tom complacently.
What--? thought Emma. You can't--I've studied this stuff-- enchantments, especially basic ones, have limits--you can't perform them in another /room,/ even, much less another building in a completely different place.
She could almost hear the amused smile in Riddle's voice as he spoke again. /I did it through you,/ he said simply. /You study well, Miss Walker--it is true that spells have definite boundaries. But there is also another truth, which I doubt you have learned yet. While they will not work outside of boundaries independently, spells of any degree can work through a second person. You./
Oh, said Emma, unsure of what else to say.
/Thus,/ continued Voldemort, /do I plan to enter Hogwarts. Through you--by far the most faithful helper I have come across yet, and not even "on my side"./ He gave a short, cold laugh. /Through you I can breach the spells of protection guarding Hogwarts. Then I will be free to enter easily. Sadly, you will no longer be of use to me. It is unfortunate when things work out in such a way./
Goosebumps broke out on Emma's arms, and she could no longer feel the heat of the fire. Inside her, the voice gave a quiet laugh, but did not speak further.
"Sadie," she said abruptly, "I'm going upstairs to--to get my Transfiguration textbook."
"It's right in front of you," said Sadie, pointing.
"Oh, yeah," Emma said, hoping her voice would hold, "I meant my--my Charms textbook."
"Okay, I'll come with," said Sadie brightly, jumping up. "There's so much still I want to talk to you about--you haven't told me about /anything/ that happened to you--"
/The alibi./ Riddle's voice cut through Emma's thoughts. /Don't forget it./
I won't, said Emma. How /could/ she, as Tom'd been drilling her in the false story ever since she'd arrived back at Hogwarts.
"Yeah, I know," said Emma, forcing brightness into her tone. She started towards the staircase that led to the girls' dormitories.
Sadie scrambled after, passed her friend, and confronted her.
"Emma, really, something's wrong. Why won't you talk to me?"
Emma ducked around Sadie. Can't you see I /want/ to talk to you? She cried voicelessly. Riddle gave a cold laugh. /Tell her to leave you alone,/ he said, cruelly amused.
"Just leave me alone," Emma snapped, the combination of her own inner struggle and the words she had to say making it harsher than it should have been.
Sadie continued to follow Emma, and laid a hand on her shoulder. "Really--if there's anything I've done--"
"Its not--" Emma began, but Riddle's irritated voice broke through her own. /Tell her it _is_ her fault,/ he commanded. /We cannot have her suspicions roused./
"Just back off, okay?" Emma said irritatedly. She was irritated, not with Sadie, but with Tom--and /more/ than irritated. She could safely say that she /hated/ the voice within her. "I--I don't feel like talking right now."
"If you're sure," said Sadie dubiously, hurt evident in her voice and eyes.
Emma turned around and watched Sadie go slowly back down the stairs, wanting to call out to her, to make her come back, to tell her everything-
/That is impossible,/ spat the voice, /and you know it./
Just /you/ leave me alone, Emma thought viciously. The voice chuckled, but subsided.
Emma continued to walk up the stairs slowly, pausing on each step, until she reached the door to the fifth-year girls' dormitory. Slowly, she pushed open the door and slowly, she went in, glad it was empty. She stood in the doorway for a moment and then walked over to her bed, sat down, pulled the curtains, and cried.
*** Emma coughed wretchedly, again.
"Emma, are you ok?"
/Tell her it's just a bad cough./
"It's just a bad cough," Emma replied despairingly.
"Oh." Sadie studied her for a moment, thinking. Then, "You haven't done your therapy recently, have you?"
"No," she said quickly, before the voice could think a nonchalant response.
Sadie looked at her like she was speaking Vietnamese. "/Why?/"
/Tell her you've been forgetting./ "I keep forgetting," Emma said robotically.
"But you've done it since forever." Sadie said, even more confused.
/Snap at her! Say it's none of her business, and to leave you alone and stop asking questions!/
"It's none of your business! Stop asking questions and leave me alone!" Emma barked. But her eyes betrayed her voice. A tear rolled down her cheek and for a brief moment, Sadie saw how tortured she was, even though she hadn't a clue why.
The voice spoke again venomously. /Now back away from her. Find somewhere where you won't be disturbed./ Emma could feel him scowling down at her. /You have some explaining to do./
Emma stepped back and shook her head slowly, hopelessly, Sadie thought, and ran out of the Common Room. Sadie sat down numbly. Something was definitely wrong.
First thing in the morning, Sadie went to Madam Pomfrey to ask her to make sure Emma went to therapy. But when she got there, Emma was already there, mouthpiece in use. She took it out and called to her over the din, "I just didn't want to care about my CF this past week, that's all. But Madam Pomfrey says it's not healthy." Emma stuck it back in gloomily and turned her back to the door. Sadie stepped out and walked slowly back down the hall.
"That's not what she wanted to say." she muttered to herself. She bolted down the hall, a resolute look on her face. She didn't stop running until she reached Dumbledore, in the Great Hall.
"Professor Dumbledore," she gasped, clutching a stitch, "you've got to talk to Emma."
Dumbledore looked surprised, but concerned. "Ms. Riddle, calm down. Professor McGonagall, will you please keep order here while I speak to Ms. Riddle?"
"Yes, Headmaster."
Dumbledore led Sadie out of the Hall and into a nearby room. "Now, Ms. Riddle, why are you so distressed?"
"It's Emma, Professor. Something's not right. She hasn't been the same since we brought her back. She's not done /any/ of her therapy, I'm not sure she's even taken her enzymes. You know how well she always takes care of herself. And plus she just hasn't been herself /at all./ I can't explain but.something-Sir, something's killing her. I can see it in her eyes."
Dumbledore looked deeply uneasy. "Would you please accompany me to the hospital wing, Ms. Riddle?"
They strode to the hospital wing and found Emma just leaving. "Ms. Walker, please come with me to my office. Hope shone in her eyes for a moment until she replied animatedly, "I've got to go eat breakfast, if it takes too long I'll miss class, I've got to go to the bathroom, I don't trust you anymore, I'll hurt myself if you make me-"
Dumbledore laid a hand on her shoulder. "That's quite enough," he said quietly, "Now /hush/."
Emma looked frightened-no, /Emma/ did not look frightened, but something about her conveyed fear. Dumbledore, keeping his hand firmly on her shoulder, and with Sadie trailing behind, took them to his office. Not breaking contact with Emma, he took a strange device out of his desk: a stone tablet with thirteen glass balls-12 smaller ones encircling a larger one-with some swirling yellow gas inside. He touched his free hand on the largest one.
"Friends, we need a quorum." The air whispered twelve confirmatory replies. In minutes Professors Snape, McGonagall, Flitwick, Winsbree, Sprout, Sinistra, Binns, Vector, and Brodeur, and Madams Pomfrey, Pince, and Hooch were all gathered in the office with grave, curious expressions.
Dumbledore addressed them. "I have reason to believe that Emma Walker has been placed under the Imperious Curse by Lord Voldemort." Emma went to run, but Dumbledore strengthened his grip. "To counter it, I must also perform the Imperious Curse. As you well know, it is strictly illegal for me to do so, and so I have called a quorum of lawfully upstanding individuals for exemption. Say 'Aye' if you feel the case must be handled as such." Each, more sober than the last, concurred. "Very well. Minerva, please lock the door." She did so and Dumbledore let go of Emma. She drew her wand.
"I will use this, Albus," Emma spat vituperatively in a voice not her own.
Dumbledore inhaled sharply and Sadie saw him as she had never seen him before-not a kindly, worn old man, but an imposing, learned sorcerer, exuding power and wisdom. He boomed "IMPERIO!" and Emma put her hands to her head and shrieked; an immense struggle for her mind was tearing her head in two. Then, like a lightning flash, Emma dropped her arms and looked around with a frightened, blank expresion. She collapsed to the floor.
Dumbledore's shoulders sagged and he looked deathly weary. "Madam Pomfrey, will you please take her to the hospital wing until she recovers? You may stay with her Miss Riddle. Thank you for coming so quickly, my associates, but now I must ask you to take leave. I have not strength.to entertain company." Dumbledore's voice faded. He stepped laboriously to his adjoining quarters. "He has grown stronger," he murmured, and shut the door behind him.
"Come Sadie," Madam Pomfrey called from the door. Emma was just outside on a floating stretcher. Sadie glanced at the door Dumbledore had left through again and left with Pomfrey, guiding Emma's stretcher and thanking a Higher Being for His support that day.
***
Emma woke the next morning to find herself in a bed in the hospital wing. Sadie was sitting in a chair nearby, A Guide to Advanced Divination across her lap. A look of intense concentration was on her face; Emma didn't feel like calling out to her yet.
Her head hurt a little, a dull, throbbing pain. Her hands stung too-- scratches from running headlong through the Forbidden Forest stood out in slim red welts on them. Her midnight run through the Forest seemed like such a long time ago--and everything that had ensued. Riddle, the Imperius Curse, the werewolves, Dumbledore--they all seemed like distant memories, memories from some other lifetime that had happened long years ago.
With a sigh she lay back on the pillow. Sadie, startled, looked up; with a broad smile she noticed that Emma was awake and scooted her chair nearer the bed, letting Advanced Divination fall unheeded to the floor.
"Emma! You're awake!" she said, obviously pleased. "I've been waiting for ages--I came here as soon as I woke up this morning--Professor Dumbledore said it was all right if I skipped Magical Linguistics and Herbology--,"
Emma stifled a yawn. "What time is it?" she asked. "Did I sleep that long?"
"Nearly ten-thirty," Sadie replied. "Hang on, Emma--I promised I'd tell Madam Pomfrey when you woke up--," she stood and began to walk away from Emma's bed, but returned almost immediately.
"No need," said Madam Pomfrey, coming into view. She carried a nebulizer in one hand and balanced a breakfast tray in the other; both she set down on the table beside Emma's bed.
"Nebulizer first, then breakfast," she instructed. Emma promptly snatched the mouthpiece off the table and held it up, looking intently at the bottom. Before Sadie could ask what she was doing, she had grabbed hold of a thin clear-plastic tube and was pulling it slowly from the nebulizer. She continued pulling until a tube about three and a half feet in length dangled from underneath the nebulizer; she handed the opposite end of the tube to Madam Pomfrey. The nurse pushed a small, six-by-four inch panel in the wall, which slid aside to reveal a small hole which was gustily blowing out air. Madam Pomfrey pushed the tube onto this, and immediately a fine mist began to come out of the mouthpiece in Emma's hand.
"Call me when you're done," said Madam Pomfrey, eyeing Emma sternly. "This morning's therapy will have to be extra-good to make up for a week of neglect."
Emma stifled a laugh and nodded. When Madam Pomfrey had gone, she raised an eyebrow at Sadie. "Neglect?" she asked, talking thickly through the mouthpiece. "I wouldn't quite call it that."
"I dunno," said Sadie. "She has a point, you know."
"Sadie, I'm really, really sorry," said Emma, abruptly changing the subject. She gave a short, hard sigh, sending a smoke-ring of albuterol mist out the other end of the nebulizer. "I acted horribly. To you. To everyone. But mostly you."
"It wasn't your fault," said Sadie awkwardly. "I mean, I hardly think anyone's going to blame you for it--,"
"That's not what I care about," said Emma. "I didn't mean to, but--," she gave a tiny smile. "I'm just sorry."
"Really, its okay," Sadie assured her. "I know that you didn't mean it--I mean, come on, you were hurting at least as much as I was, weren't you?"
Emma gave a small nod and looked down at the white sheet.
Regardless of the nebulizer, Sadie reached forward and put her arms around her friend. "Really, its okay," she said. "I'm glad you're back."
"Me too," Emma smiled tearfully. "Me too.