I was sitting down stairs in the living room flipping randomly through channels, not really intent on watching anything I came upon, but trying to keep myself from facing what happened earlier this afternoon. Jamie became tired quickly after her father abrubtly left, and my mother and I both thought it be best that we skip our lunch date so that Jamie could go rest. I could hear her tossing and turning from our bedroom, and I decided to go up and see her.
I walked into our small bedroom by just turning right at the top of the stairs. I saw Jamie lying on her side facing me with her eyes open, watching the phone with an intent stare. I knew she was waiting for her father to call, and it broke my heart to see Jamie so distressed. I knew it couldn't be good for the baby either. I walked quietly over to the bed, and sat on the edge by her stomach. Gently caressing my hand down her cheek, I asked..
"Did you get any sleep, baby?"
"Some." Jamie replied wearily, with a sigh.
"Baby... I know your father's reaction this afternoon was, well... shocking, but that's just the way father's are. Protective of their little girls, ya know?" I smiled sincerely at her, trying to wear down her worries.
"I imagine if we had invited him to lunch to tell him that we were dating, he would have reacted the same way. But we got through that... and this isn't anything we can't get through Jamie. Your father may be a bit stubborn, but he's forgiving, and eventually he's going to see what a great thing this is."
Jamie sighed again, and looked up at me. I was hoping that what I had said made her feel at least a little better, and maybe more hopeful.
"Landon, I just... It hurts to know that my father is disappointed with me. All the time that I was sick, he had rules that at times may have seemed strict, but it was all for my benefit so that I would stay healthy."
Jamie closed her eyes for a moment, taking in a deep breath, perhaps rekindling the sad realization of what this pregnancy was going to do to her health.
I could barely tell her eyes had opened once again, as she simply stared downwards. It broke my heart more and more by the second.
"I just wish he could be supportive..."
I didn't know what to say to her. Jamie always knew the right words to say to cheer me up when I was down, and I felt slightly dissappointed in myself that I was failing at making her feel better. I gathered Jamie up in my arms, and held her closely as she cried silently, but I could tell she was by her breathing pattern. I could always tell when Jamie was crying, and I didn't even have to be in the same room as her.. I didn't even need to be awake. I had awoken to Jamie crying a few times since we'd been husband and wife, and I simply knew by the strange sinking feeling I would feel that would wake me. I could also tell when Jamie was happy, which was one of my favorite feelings in the world. Her smile was always so bright and it radiated such a wonderful energy that I swear anyone near her could feel it. Jamie touched me, and changed me in so many ways that I could simply never begin to explain. The feeling of loving her, and being loved back was like that of a feeling I'd never felt before. Our souls were one. Our hearts were joined, and right now.. both of our hearts were broken.
I held Jamie and comforted her as she cried, and eventually she got tired and layed back down. We both fell asleep together, with my arms wrapped securely around her, one hand pressed against her stomach... our baby.
It was about 8pm when I was awoken by a knocking at the door. I looked over at Jamie beside me, who was still asleep. Jamie wasn't far through her pregnancy at all, but she already started having the appetite of a pregnant woman, so I figured she might have ordered a pizza or something and just fallen back to sleep. It took me a while to get out of bed trying not to wake Jamie, but I finally got downstairs, and answered the door at mid-knock.
I was shocked and speachless when I opened the door, and saw.. Reverend Sullivan. I kind of stuttered, but eventually I got out "H-h-hello Reverend."
He nodded, and then said "I'd like to see my daughter."
I opened the door wider, and invited him in while I went to get Jamie. I didn't tell him she was sleeping, because I knew he would insist that I not wake her, but I know that Jamie would be really upset if I didn't.
"Jamie... Jaaamie.." I shook her gently
"Hmm" she mumbled sleepily.
I gently kissed her cheek, and smiled slightly, "Your father's here. He's downstairs."
Jamie sat up quickly, and I could tell she was still half asleep but trying to grasp being awake.
"What? My father? He's downstairs?" She squinted her eyes a bit, and asked me.
"Mmhmm." I nodded
I laced her fingers with mine, and took her hand leading her off of the bed.
"Come on, let's go see what he wants."
When we got downstairs the Reverend was sitting on the edge of the couch, but he quickly stood as Jamie and I entered the living room. Jamie smiled nervously, but tried desperately to hide it, and greeted him "Hi daddy. I'm glad you came over."
He smiled for about a split second, and then started to clear his throat
"Um, Landon.. Jamie.. I came over here to apologise for my behaviour this afternoon."
"Daddy..." Jamie started to interrupt.
"No Jamie, please let me get this out... Ever since the doctors told me that I was going to lose my baby girl, I became more protective of you. I know I may have seemed strict, but I just didn't want anything to happen to you... I didn't want you to be exposed to the bad things in life. I now realize that times when I thought you were getting yourself into a bad situation, things turned out okay..." the Reverend smiled at us, and we smiled back. He took his glasses off, and sat down again on the couch, and motioned for us to come over to him.
"You're all I've got left Jamie... I just don't want to lose you."
All was quiet for a few seconds. A few seconds that seemed like minutes though. The mood in the room was sad, and uncomfortable, and the reverend I'm sure had pent these thoughts and feelings up for a long time... but right now, he was egar to move on.
He smiled, and placed a hand on Jamie's stomach.
"But now I'm going to have a grandchild. God's made a plan, and this little guy is going to become a part of it" He lightly tickled Jamie's stomach, as she laughed, and I could feel it. Jamie's smile radiated warmth, happiness and beauty, and everything that had happened today slowly vanished from importance, and it was simply the moment. We were starting a family, and the two people who mattered most in our lives were supportive of it. Nothing was saddening at that moment, as we sat in our living room with Jamie's father, and we just enjoyed the lives of expecting parents like any normal couple would. I couldn't tear the smile off of my face, because for once since I learned of Jamie's pregnancy, I honestly believed everything was going to be alright.
I walked into our small bedroom by just turning right at the top of the stairs. I saw Jamie lying on her side facing me with her eyes open, watching the phone with an intent stare. I knew she was waiting for her father to call, and it broke my heart to see Jamie so distressed. I knew it couldn't be good for the baby either. I walked quietly over to the bed, and sat on the edge by her stomach. Gently caressing my hand down her cheek, I asked..
"Did you get any sleep, baby?"
"Some." Jamie replied wearily, with a sigh.
"Baby... I know your father's reaction this afternoon was, well... shocking, but that's just the way father's are. Protective of their little girls, ya know?" I smiled sincerely at her, trying to wear down her worries.
"I imagine if we had invited him to lunch to tell him that we were dating, he would have reacted the same way. But we got through that... and this isn't anything we can't get through Jamie. Your father may be a bit stubborn, but he's forgiving, and eventually he's going to see what a great thing this is."
Jamie sighed again, and looked up at me. I was hoping that what I had said made her feel at least a little better, and maybe more hopeful.
"Landon, I just... It hurts to know that my father is disappointed with me. All the time that I was sick, he had rules that at times may have seemed strict, but it was all for my benefit so that I would stay healthy."
Jamie closed her eyes for a moment, taking in a deep breath, perhaps rekindling the sad realization of what this pregnancy was going to do to her health.
I could barely tell her eyes had opened once again, as she simply stared downwards. It broke my heart more and more by the second.
"I just wish he could be supportive..."
I didn't know what to say to her. Jamie always knew the right words to say to cheer me up when I was down, and I felt slightly dissappointed in myself that I was failing at making her feel better. I gathered Jamie up in my arms, and held her closely as she cried silently, but I could tell she was by her breathing pattern. I could always tell when Jamie was crying, and I didn't even have to be in the same room as her.. I didn't even need to be awake. I had awoken to Jamie crying a few times since we'd been husband and wife, and I simply knew by the strange sinking feeling I would feel that would wake me. I could also tell when Jamie was happy, which was one of my favorite feelings in the world. Her smile was always so bright and it radiated such a wonderful energy that I swear anyone near her could feel it. Jamie touched me, and changed me in so many ways that I could simply never begin to explain. The feeling of loving her, and being loved back was like that of a feeling I'd never felt before. Our souls were one. Our hearts were joined, and right now.. both of our hearts were broken.
I held Jamie and comforted her as she cried, and eventually she got tired and layed back down. We both fell asleep together, with my arms wrapped securely around her, one hand pressed against her stomach... our baby.
It was about 8pm when I was awoken by a knocking at the door. I looked over at Jamie beside me, who was still asleep. Jamie wasn't far through her pregnancy at all, but she already started having the appetite of a pregnant woman, so I figured she might have ordered a pizza or something and just fallen back to sleep. It took me a while to get out of bed trying not to wake Jamie, but I finally got downstairs, and answered the door at mid-knock.
I was shocked and speachless when I opened the door, and saw.. Reverend Sullivan. I kind of stuttered, but eventually I got out "H-h-hello Reverend."
He nodded, and then said "I'd like to see my daughter."
I opened the door wider, and invited him in while I went to get Jamie. I didn't tell him she was sleeping, because I knew he would insist that I not wake her, but I know that Jamie would be really upset if I didn't.
"Jamie... Jaaamie.." I shook her gently
"Hmm" she mumbled sleepily.
I gently kissed her cheek, and smiled slightly, "Your father's here. He's downstairs."
Jamie sat up quickly, and I could tell she was still half asleep but trying to grasp being awake.
"What? My father? He's downstairs?" She squinted her eyes a bit, and asked me.
"Mmhmm." I nodded
I laced her fingers with mine, and took her hand leading her off of the bed.
"Come on, let's go see what he wants."
When we got downstairs the Reverend was sitting on the edge of the couch, but he quickly stood as Jamie and I entered the living room. Jamie smiled nervously, but tried desperately to hide it, and greeted him "Hi daddy. I'm glad you came over."
He smiled for about a split second, and then started to clear his throat
"Um, Landon.. Jamie.. I came over here to apologise for my behaviour this afternoon."
"Daddy..." Jamie started to interrupt.
"No Jamie, please let me get this out... Ever since the doctors told me that I was going to lose my baby girl, I became more protective of you. I know I may have seemed strict, but I just didn't want anything to happen to you... I didn't want you to be exposed to the bad things in life. I now realize that times when I thought you were getting yourself into a bad situation, things turned out okay..." the Reverend smiled at us, and we smiled back. He took his glasses off, and sat down again on the couch, and motioned for us to come over to him.
"You're all I've got left Jamie... I just don't want to lose you."
All was quiet for a few seconds. A few seconds that seemed like minutes though. The mood in the room was sad, and uncomfortable, and the reverend I'm sure had pent these thoughts and feelings up for a long time... but right now, he was egar to move on.
He smiled, and placed a hand on Jamie's stomach.
"But now I'm going to have a grandchild. God's made a plan, and this little guy is going to become a part of it" He lightly tickled Jamie's stomach, as she laughed, and I could feel it. Jamie's smile radiated warmth, happiness and beauty, and everything that had happened today slowly vanished from importance, and it was simply the moment. We were starting a family, and the two people who mattered most in our lives were supportive of it. Nothing was saddening at that moment, as we sat in our living room with Jamie's father, and we just enjoyed the lives of expecting parents like any normal couple would. I couldn't tear the smile off of my face, because for once since I learned of Jamie's pregnancy, I honestly believed everything was going to be alright.