I couldn't really understand how I could be in such a dreamy haze and yet still so clear-headed. Galadriel's words were an enigma to me, but they seemed to make sense at the same time. If I had ever dared imagine a dialogue between an immortal who was tens of thousands of years old and a 36 year old, I would have lost my mind. But it's happening and it's happening to me.

I pulled my pack closer and got out my cleansing supplies, nail file and comb. Galadriel began to sing as I washed. The air was permeated with the light scent of lavender and there was a cool breeze blowing through the garden.

Climbing roses of the softest pink grew over the hedge and the grass was studded with tiny yellow flowers that looked as if they had been sprinkled from a shaker. My dream-like state intensified as the Elves of the city took up Galadriel's song and I became lost in it.

I had a waking dream of flight then. I rose up over the garden and out through the canopy, soaring high above the mountains. From that height, Middle Earth was nothing but beauty. Except for the hazy grey enveloping the southeast, there was no sign of death or disease, only green lawns and white mountaintops, golden fields and silver waterways.

Higher I flew until I could see the star spangled sky above me and the blue ocean surrounding the whole of Middle Earth below. I looked to the west and saw a brilliant white light. I felt a great need to fly toward it. But it was not my time, and the song slowly, gently came to an end. I was pulled back, not harshly, but insistently until I returned to my body. I was leaning my head on the side of the spring; I had my eyes closed and I felt a broad smile on my face.

Galadriel had gotten out of the spring and dressed. I found that while I was dreaming I had washed my hair and body. I was clean, so very, very clean. I got out of the bath and took my gold dress out of my pack and put it on.

Galadriel was smiling at me when I looked up. She didn't have to say a word; somehow I knew what she was thinking. My dress, the one Legolas had made for me, was the color of the leaves of Lothlórien. I felt like I belonged there somehow. Maybe not permanently, but it was where I was supposed to be, where I was meant to be at that time. I remembered Galadriel saying that it was no accident that I came to Lórien.

I combed my hair and put all my things back in my pack and picked it up. Galadriel took my hand again and we walked silently back to the ladder. The three guards stood and bowed again and we climbed. This time, when we got to my flet, Galadriel waited for me to leave my pack and then beckoned for me to follow her up the ladder. I did and for some reason, probably the haze I was in, I was not afraid of the height. We climbed higher and higher until we reached a huge talan.

As we climbed a thought had occurred to me and I decided to ask before we entered the flet. "My Lady, why didn't Haldir blindfold me when we reached the bank of the river? Isn't that your law?"

"Because I told him not to when I sent him to guide you."

"But why would you tell him that? You didn't know me then."

"There are two answers to this question. The first is that I knew of your errand, Elrond and Mithrandir told me of you before you left Rivendell. The second is that you would have found your way to Caras Galadhon with or without a guide, even blindfolded."

I was puzzled and I'm sure it showed on my face, because she continued, "As I have said, there is Eldar in you. No Elf can ever be lost in Laurelindórnan; he has only to think of where he wishes to go and his destination calls to him. It would have been the same for you. The voice of the trees would have been all the more clear had you been without sight."

She led me into the flet, it was wide and the tree grew straight up though it. It wasn't quite round, but narrowed on either end of the great room. It had walls of green and silver and a golden roof, but I could not tell if they were hewn wood or living tree. There were many Elves standing and sitting in the hall, all clad in grey, white, or gold.

We walked straight up to the far end of the oval room to two chairs under a living canopy of golden leaves. Standing in front of one chair was a tall ellon with hair as silver as Galadriel's was gold. He was dressed in a white floor-length robe with silver thread embroidered in intricate patterns along the hem and neckline. I knew it was Celeborn and I curtsied low and bowed my head.

Galadriel went and stood in front of her chair and Celeborn spoke, "Lady Elaura, rise. My Lady has told me much about you; I long to see the light of the trees again. Let me see your eyes."

I stood and looked up at him. He looked into my eyes and a wistful expression came over his face. I didn't feel the touch of his mind, but I could see plainly that he was lost in a memory. I held his gaze until he spoke again, "Though my lady Wife never speaks falsely, I hardly dared hope her words were true. Thank you, please sit."

A chair was brought forward and I waited for the Lord and Lady to take their seats and then I sat. A table was set between us and laden with food that was as wonderful to see as it was to smell. We ate, but talked very little. It seemed like all that ever needed to be said had been already. The silence was not uncomfortable and when we had finished eating the table was taken away again.

Many Elves came to speak with the Lord and Lady and then went on their way again. I didn't listen to their words, but sat in the dreamy haze that always seemed to surround me in Lórien. At length the Lady looked to me and spoke, "You may walk freely in the City, you need not stay here."

I nodded and stood. "Thank you, I'd love to explore for a while."

"We will send for you should the need arise," Celeborn said.

I bowed to Celeborn and to Galadriel and left the flet.

I found that there were narrow walkways between the trees on many levels. They were mostly wide branches, but they were flattened somewhat and easy to walk on in bare feet. I wasn't ever uneasy about the height and I never lost my balance. There were even living stairs between levels and although I went this way and that for hours I never felt as if I could lose my way.

Eventually, I got tired and made my way back to my own flet. When I entered I found my weapons laid neatly against the wall and a table and chair set up near the middle of the room. My travel clothes had been cleaned and folded and left on the bed; the tears in the sleeves of my shirt had been neatly mended. My glove was on the top of the pile, but I didn't put it on, instead I picked up the clothes and set them on the chair, changed into my pajamas and went to sleep.

I slept peacefully and at dawn I woke. I couldn't remember my dreams, but I had a warm fuzzy feeling that told me whatever they were, they were nice. There was a tray of food on the table by the bed and I had a lovely breakfast of small boiled eggs, fruit, and bread.

I put my gold dress on again and spent the day wandering around the city, trying to keep my mind occupied instead of wondering when the Fellowship would arrive. I climbed up to the tops of the trees and then down again to the ground level and went all the way around the wall on the inside. Near dusk I returned to the ladder and began to climb up to my room.

When I stopped at my flet, a group of three Elves clad in grey cloaks climbed quickly down past me. I decided to go up to the great hall to find out what was going on. I got to the large talan and the Lord and Lady were in conversation with an Elf with a long bow on his back. Shortly, the three Elves who had zipped past my bedchamber came into the room.

They spoke hurriedly to Celeborn and then the four Elves left and several of the Elves who had been sitting in the room stood and left as well. They did not head down the ladder as I'd thought they would, they went up. Of course they're going up. They don't need to walk on the ground; it's safer to travel in the treetops and easier to track and attack.

When the last of the Elves had disappeared, Galadriel turned to me, "Those you met in Rivendell have passed within the borders of Lothlórien. Indeed Haldir will meet them soon after nightfall. They will sleep by the falls of Nimrodel and be here at dusk two days from now."

I stood and thought for a moment and then responded, "My lady, I very much desire to see Legolas again, but I'm afraid that I can't bear the grief of the company without telling them what I know."

"Legolas will understand and will not press you, but I fear you are correct about the others. They must not know you are here, at least not until their grief has eased. You are free to go where you wish, but by the time they arrive, you must go to your talan. Legolas will come to you after they have all taken a healing rest."

"My Lord, my lady, I know that there are orcs tracking them. I wish to go with the hunting party. I don't believe I can just sit and wait for the Fellowship to arrive. It will be better if even Legolas has a few days of rest before I see him."

"No, I cannot allow it," Celeborn answered. "It would be too dangerous for you."

By reflex, I balled my hands into fists, angry that I'd been shot down so quickly.

"Perhaps," began Galadriel, "but I believe Elaura is correct. I have seen that she will find her way into this war, who better to gain experience with in battle than our own Galadhrim?"

Celeborn looked at Galadriel questioningly and after a few moments, turned back to me. "You may go. Gird yourself for battle and meet my warriors at the top of this tree."

I bowed quickly and turned and went back to my flet, adrenaline surged through my veins. I changed into my bra, shirt, trousers, tunic, and boots, leaving the jacket. I took off my ring and put on my glove; I noticed that the tip of the little finger sleeve had been cut off and the edges were finished, leaving the end of my lengthened pinkie bare. I replaced the ring and then put on my hook and weapons. I tightened my belt and finally strapped my knife onto my right calf. Although I was used to wearing it on my left, I felt that if I were using my sword I might need to block with the knife in my right hand.

The last thing I did before going up the ladder was pull my hair back into a bun with two of the ponytail holders the tailor had made for me and shove my healer's pouch into my tunic. I didn't bother to grab my water skin, which had been placed next to my pack. I found three Elves at the top of the ladder and I fell in between the second and third. Although I could hear my own movements, I couldn't hear the Elves and I made a concerted effort to match their soundless motion.

We traveled North West. I managed to quiet my movements considerably and also keep up. We went quickly through the trees, sometimes running, sometimes hopping from branch to branch. I was sure the Elves were choosing a route they felt I could go, but I never had the feeling I was slowing them down.

Soon I was aware of a large company of Elves going in the same direction we were. I couldn't hear them, but I knew they were there. Something has changed . . . I've changed. I hope whatever has happened to me stays with me when I leave Lórien.

I began to hear songs in my head, dark songs, death metal. It was dark, but I could see the glow of the Elves' skin. Even the trees had a faint illumination, not much, but enough for me to navigate by. We'd been running through the treetops for several hours when I began to smell that smell. I knew that smell. Worse than death. Orcs.

I followed my companions to a low talan; many others waited on higher platforms and in the branches, but none dropped to the floor of the wood. We stayed downwind and we waited for the dawn.

I remembered from the books that this troop of orcs was at least a hundred strong and that none of them would ever leave the wood. We were near enough to the edge of the forest that I could hear the howling of wargs. I remembered the line, "He breathes so loud we could shoot him in the dark" and I slowed my breathing. I felt myself calming; I felt the matrix-like slowing of time as I had before in the glade with Gimli.

The sun was rising. One of my companions touched my shoulder and I turned to look at him. He looked at my hook and I nodded. I took the leather sleeve off of it. He whispered, "Wait until the first volley is fired, then follow me."

I nodded again and pulled my axe out of the harness, the blade glinted. I soon heard the sound of clinking metal. Orc armor. I saw the movement of bows being drawn. Not directly, but out of the corners of my eyes. I could see in the dim light there was a path beneath us. That's where they'll come, from the west. Then I saw them.

There were no Urukai with this band, but there were easily a hundred of them. I was more frightened then than I could ever remember being, but I was exhilarated also. When half the troop was underneath us, the first volley was fired. I took a deep breath and waited. The air was heavy with the stench of the orcs and then it was filled with their screams of pain and rage.

Suddenly "Down with the Sickness" by Disturbed found its way into my head and I leaned forward, ready to pounce. "Gurth an glamhoth! [S. Death to the din-horde! (orcs)]," yelled my companion and he jumped. I was two seconds behind him and then the trees were raining Elves. I screamed and swung at the nearest orc.

Its head flew off and I spun with the blow aiming at the back of the legs of the next one. I hamstrung it and it fell to its knees. I was in a fury. I spotted an orc with a bow drawn on an Elf in a tree; I pulled the axe directly over my head and brought it down on its skull. It crumpled before me, but my axe was stuck. I screamed again and gave a mighty yank but my axe would not come free. "FUCK!" I yelled and pulled out my sword.

I held my sword in my left hand and was soon locked in combat with an even more disgusting character than I had yet seen. Its head looked as if it was held together with staples. It reminded me of Leatherface from the Texas Chainsaw Massacre movies.

Drowning Pool's "Bodies" came to me and I began to sing: "One - Nothing wrong with me," and the orc lost its right leg and I moved to the next. "Two - Nothing wrong with me," I slashed another's throat with the tip of my sword. "Three - Nothing wrong with me," I drew my knife and blocked a near blow from an orc that had come up on my side. "Four - Nothing wrong with me," I ran the fucker through. "One - Something's got to give," I yanked my sword out of it and spun on the orc behind me. "Two - Something's got to give," that one didn't even have time to react before its head became a bowling ball. "Three - Something's got to give, NOW!" I jumped on the back of the orc in front of me and ripped out its throat with my hook.

By this time, there were very few orcs left alive. Those that were still mobile were running like mad in all directions; the Elves that were still in the trees picked them off as they ran. I felt a tap on my shoulder and I spun around with my sword . . . if the Elf hadn't grabbed my wrist, I would've had his head. I may have been fast, but he was faster.

It was my companion from the platform. I looked into his eyes and he was as startled as I was. "For fuck's sake! Don't EVER do that again!" I yelled at him and he grinned. I busted out laughing. I couldn't help it; I was too high from the battle. An orc near my feet moved and I drove my sword through its chest without blinking.

"Mae carnen! [S. Well done!]," he said and clapped me on the back. We made our way over to the orc with my axe in his head and the Elf deftly pulled it out with one hand and gave it back to me. I slid it into my harness.

Another orc moved and I reached down and pulled out its throat with my hook. When I stood, my new friend took my right wrist in his hand and held it up to look at it. He grinned broadly and shook the gore out of the hook. He nodded in approval. "Good weapon. Who made it?"

"Gimli, son of Glóin, a Dwarf."

"A Dwarf? Ah, I see your ring now. You are friends with a Dwarf and you are betrothed to an Elf of Mirkwood? . . ."

A black arrow whizzed past us and stuck in the trunk of a tree that stood between us to my right. I turned in the direction from which it came and launched a hatchet. The hatchet planted between the orc's surprised eyes. I turned back to my companion and his mouth was open. "Not just any Elf of Mirkwood, my friend. Prince Legolas Thranduilion." I'm not usually a name-dropper, but I was high as a kite.

I stepped over the bodies and retrieved my hatchet; I wiped it off on the dead orc's ratty tunic and replaced it in its holster. The smell of dead orcs was even worse than the smell of live ones. Soon it dawned on me that this mess was going to have to be cleaned up, and there were no magic ninjas that would come and do it for us.

Many of the other Elves had chased and tracked the orcs that had run away; they were returning. They were poking the dead and turning them to make sure they were really dead. I looked around the battleground and saw not a single Elf dead or wounded.

I looked at my companion, "Time to dispose of this mess?"

"Are you volunteering?" he replied and grinned.

"Somebody has to do it, right?"

"Are you not weary?"

"Exhausted, actually." I was beginning to come down.

"Perhaps you should leave this to us. There is a talan in that tree," he motioned to a nearby mallorn. "Climb up to it and rest."

"If there are any wounded, send them up to me; I was taught to be a healer in Rivendell," I said and he raised his eyebrows.

"A warrior who heals, betrothed to an Elf and friends with a Dwarf. You and I must have a drink and discuss this when we return to the city."

"As you wish," I said and climbed up to the flet.

I took out my knife and held it in my left hand tightly. I went over the battle and marveled at how I was able to use just the very basic movements that Glorfindel and Gimli had taught me successfully. Then again, these orcs are slow and stupid, I wouldn't have done so well against a well-trained warrior or an Uruk. I sat with my back against the tree trunk and fell asleep.

I felt my boot jarred and I jumped awake. I brandished my knife in the direction of the sensation. It was an Elf, one I hadn't seen before, peeking up over the side of the platform; he looked very young. "You guys have got to stop sneaking up on me!" I barked at him as I wiped my face with my filthy hand.

The Elf waited patiently for me to wake up completely. "Man? [S. What?]" I asked him.

He turned slowly and I saw a streak of red staining his golden hair from his crown down his back. Then he climbed all the way onto the flet; there was a look of disgust on his face. He was wearing a water skin and I reached for it; he allowed me to take it and I washed the black orc-blood off my hands.

He sat in front of me. I carefully separated the hair and found the gash. This is too clean. Everything about the orcs is filthy and disgusting. Where's the dirt? I voiced my thoughts to him in Sindarin.

He grumbled his answer, also in Sindarin, "It was not an orc. A rock was hurled at me from above. I had tracked a strange creature and somehow it got above me."

Gollum. "Did you lose consciousness?"

"No, but I was unable to see for several moments. The creature got away; the coward attacked from behind."

I took out my pouch and sorted out the things I would need: needle and thread, ointment, a strip of the aspirin-bark for his headache. "Pardon me for pointing out the irony, but didn't we just ambush a troop of orcs?"

He leaned around to face me, stunned that I would say such a thing. "You imply that we have done something cowardly? We defend our own lands."

"No, not at all. What I'm saying is that there are no rules in war for either side. I split an orc's skull from behind today; does that make me a coward? You'd be better off not judging anyone at all than to judge inconsistently." I grabbed his head and turned it back around so that I could see what I was doing.

"This was not like my training," he said softly.

Suddenly I realized this Elf's youthful appearance was not just an illusion. "This was your first battle?" I asked.

"It was the first that I fought on the ground. I have killed uncounted orcs with my bow. This was the first time I had to use my sword."

"Well it was my first battle of any kind," I replied.

"Really?" he sounded astonished, "How many did you kill?"

"Four, maybe five. I wasn't actually counting. Listen, my point is that if you try to fight a real battle the way you sparred in training, you'll get yourself killed. The bad guys are trying to hurt you; they'll do anything they can to do it. You have to be able to do what it takes to kill them, even if it seems shady at the time."

He winced as I washed and stitched the wound, "You are saying behave like THEM? They kill women and children, they torture and rape . . ."

I cut him off, "NO! That's not what I'm saying. I'm saying fight like them. There's no rules; kick, gouge, scratch, throw rocks and hit them from behind if you have to." I leaned forward and showed him my hook; it was still crusted with black gore. "Have you ever ripped out a throat?"

He shook his head.

"I thought when I lost my fingers it would be a handicap. I took two orcs with this today. I think differently now. I'll bet you have a headache." I took a piece of bark and handed it to him. "Here, chew on this; it's bitter, but it will ease the throbbing."

He accepted it. "Le hannon," you have given me much to think about."

"Don't think too much mellon nín, nothing good can come of it in war."

He nodded and hopped down from the flet to the ground. I watched him speak to another Elf. There was nothing left of the battle below except trampled, stained grass. The smell of burning garbage was thick in the air.

We split up into small groups of threes and fours and patrolled the northwestern borders of Lórien for a few more days. The Elves had food and water stashed on talans all over the place. We encountered a few small bands of orcs, but neither my axe nor my healing skills were needed again. Eventually my group headed back towards the city.

I washed fully-clothed in the falls of the cold Nimrodel and felt the filth of battle washed from my body and my soul. We made our way back to the city through the trees. I considered going directly back to my flet and changing, but when we arrived, we went to the great hall. Legolas, Aragorn, and Gimli were there, sitting with Celeborn and Galadriel. They all stood as we approached.

"Lassie!" Gimli exclaimed in surprise.

"Elaura, what are you doing here?" asked Legolas and he took a step toward me.

I smiled and nodded my head to them in a half-bow as my companions and I walked directly up to the Lord and Lady and our captain reported the events of the past few days. I stood silently, not looking around.

"The band of orcs that was tracking our visitors has been disposed of, my lord," our leader said and bowed to Celeborn.

"Have all who set out returned?" Celeborn asked.

"Yes, my lord."

"And how did the lady fare?"

"She fought well. I counted twelve kills to her credit."

My mouth dropped open. TWELVE?! I don't remember that many.

Galadriel noted my surprise and smiled at me. "I am not surprised, Elaura," she said. "It was a good test; remember what you learned, it will serve you well."

"And what of the creature?" Celeborn asked. "Haldir reported something very small that was not an orc or an animal, yet moved unlike a Halfling."

"My Lord," I began, "I treated a young Elf who had been hit in the back of the head by a rock. He had been tracking the creature, but was blinded by the concussion and the creature escaped."

"I see. I do not like the idea of an unknown creature wandering in the Golden Wood." Then to his Captain, "Send out a party to capture it, kill it if need be."

"My Lord," I spoke again. "Mithrandir believed this creature has a purpose though it had not yet been revealed to him. It will not cross the Nimrodel; please leave it be. There are more dangerous foes to concern your warriors with."

"Were Mithrandir here I would seek his counsel on the matter. Alas, he is not. My command will stand. I will not abide a stranger walking freely in the Wood."

I bowed low in acceptance. The others of my company took their leave and as I turned to follow, Galadriel spoke, "Your time patrolling our border has ended. Stay with us and be reunited with your friends."

I turned to face her and bowed, then I turned to face Aragorn, Legolas, and Gimli.

"Twelve! Splendid, Lassie!" Gimli said and stepped up to me, clasping my left forearm.

I grinned. "Three with my axe, one with a hatchet and two with my hook, Gimli! Ripped their black throats right out. The Elves were very impressed with this little thing," I said and held up my right hand.

Aragorn smiled and inclined his head, but did not speak.

"Send me away to Mirkwood, will you? I guess the Valar had other plans," I said to him and Legolas.

"Apparently," Aragorn replied.

Legolas reached forward and took my right hand. He turned it and stared at my pinkie.

"A gift from the Lady, hún nín." I explained and took off my hook and glove. I turned my hand palm-side up and Legolas traced the faded scar with his finger. He looked to Galadriel and smiled and bowed his head.

"Looks as good as new, Lass!" Gimli said, smiling.

"Better than new, Gimli. I could never have torn an orc-throat with my bare fingers."

A chair was brought up for me and we all sat. There was a table nearby with food on it and I munched while we talked.

"How did you get here, Lass? I thought you would be safe in the palace at Mirkwood by now."

"Long story, Gimli. There was an avalanche on the mountain." I saw Legolas' eyes widen and a look of concern washed over him. "Your people are fine, Legolas, Willow too, though I had to leave her behind."

I told them of my adventures and Gimli asked many questions. Legolas sat quietly with his hands on his knees and Aragorn shook his head several times.

When my tale was finished, Legolas looked at me, confused. "You have not asked of Mithrandir, Elaura. Has battle changed you so much that you do not care?"

"I know what happened on Caradhras and in Moria, Legolas," I answered slowly.

"There is no grief in your voice; you have changed," he said sadly.

I put my hand on his. "Legolas, I grieve for your loss, and for yours Gimli, but not for those who have passed. They are with the Valar and they will be taken care of. I have changed, but not from battle. I've changed from being here, from talking to the Lady and," I added hesitantly, "from looking into her mirror."

Aragorn looked at me intently, "Do not speak of what you have seen. It is for you alone."

"I realize that, my lord. You understand better than anyone, don't you?"

"Aye," he replied and said no more.

"Perhaps you have been here too long, Lass. You are beginning to sound like an Elf," said Gimli.

Galadriel spoke then, "Go now, rest and change. Lay aside your weapons for a time. You will need them again soon enough."

We all stood. I turned and bowed to the Lord and Lady and led the way back to the ladder. On the way down, I stopped at my flet and Legolas waited for me. Aragorn and Gimli continued down to the ground.

I put down my pack and tucked the healer's pouch inside it. I put my hook and glove on the table and removed my weapons. I also took off my tunic and folded it and laid it on the chair. Then I took off my boots and set them by my weapons. Finally, I took down my hair and left the ponytail holders on the table. My gold dress was clean and lying on the bed. I picked it up and donned my pack again.

Legolas had watched in silence. I went to the ladder and climbed down; he followed me. A tent had been erected in the glade by the fountain. I listened as we walked past it, but heard no one inside. I took Legolas' hand and led him down the slope to the spring. At the gate I turned to him, "Wait here, hún nín I'll be out in a minute."

He nodded and stood just outside the gate, singing softly as I bathed. When I had combed my hair and dressed I found him in exactly the same spot I'd left him.

"Is this better, Legolas? Can you see now that I'm still me?"

He smiled. "Yes, meleth nín. I must admit it was disconcerting to see you walk into the hall looking as if you had just come from a great battle and smelling of orc blood."

"And I thought LIVE orcs smelled bad. Rotting orc flesh is the most disgusting thing conceivable. I almost hate to take these dirty clothes back up to my room. I want to take you somewhere though Legolas. Have you been to the top of the ladder, yet?"

"No," he laughed then. "You are no longer afraid of climbing?"

"Not here," I answered earnestly. We went back up the hill and up the ladder; I dropped off my pack and clothes on the way up. Up and up, past the great hall to a talan at the very top of the tree. We climbed onto it and stood. Legolas was speechless.

Spread out before us in the afternoon sun was a broad expanse of golden carpet. To the west were the mountains, to the east was the Anduin; the wood between them was crystal clear and glowed with the same pure white intensity of the Lady Galadriel. Everything past the borders of Lothlórien looked veiled in a grey mist by comparison. "It's like catching a glimpse of the world before evil touched it, isn't it?"

I could almost see the grief lifted from Legolas' heart as he bent to kiss me.

End of Chapter 33.