This was not what Sammy had expected when he first came to Gravity Falls. On the outside, it looked like such a calm and peaceful town. But flying through the air in a golf cart with two kids while fleeing from a creature of unimaginable terror? That was not calm or peaceful in any way! The golf cart crashed through a large sign before roughly landing on the ground. It was a wonder that they hadn't crashed yet. Behind them, the giant footsteps grew louder. The girl with the purple sweater, pink hairband, and braces on her teeth looked over her shoulder at the thing that was chasing after them. "It's getting closer!," she cried. "I'm driving as fast as I can!," cried Sammy, his hands gripping the steering wheel so tightly that it hurt. Suddenly, they heard what sounded like something large being ripped out of the ground. Then, a large shadow fell over them, but it wasn't the monster. It was a large tree that the monster threw at them, flying right over the speeding golf cart before landing right in their path. "Look out!," yelled the girl as she pointed straight ahead. Unfortunately, there was no time to serve out of the way. Instead, Sammy, the girl, and the boy with the cap and vest could only scream in terror as they were about to crash into the tree…but how did it come to this? How did this even happen?
Well, it all started at the beginning of summer, which wasn't that long ago - only a few days ago, in fact. That day, Dipper and Mabel moved in with their great uncle Stan, a notorious conman who runs a tourist trap called the Mystery Shack, in Gravity Falls, Oregon. However, Stan was also very busy on that day, "fleecing the rubes" as he called it, so other than greeting them at the nearby bus stop, he had no time to show the twins around the shack or show them to their new rooms. Instead, that task was given to Sammy, Stan's newest employee.
Sammy was hired by Stan only a few days before summer started, and first arrived at the sleepy town of Gravity Falls a few days before that. His job was to keep watch over Stan's inventory and make sure that nothing went missing or stolen. Sammy is a little bit on the tall side, standing at exactly six feet tall, and usually wore a white T-shirt with gray pants and black sneakers. He was also a little pale, but not to the point where it was noticeable. He has a couple of brown freckles on his cheeks, and slightly long brown hair that was usually tied into a bun or a ponytail. He also wore large glasses that were a bit too big for him. Sammy had no idea what to expect when Stan first introduced him to the twins, before pretty much dumping them on his shoulders. Mabel seemed to like him immediately, and Sammy liked her back. He thought she was the friendliest and most energetic person he had ever met in his life. Dipper, on the other hand, was much more reserved and seemed to be on his guard around him. After some quick introductions with each other, Sammy finally showed them to their new room - the attic. It was actually the same room that HE was sleeping in, since he had only recently arrived at Gravity Falls and didn't have anywhere to stay yet. Stan initially hated the idea of Sammy living in the Mystery Shack with him - at least Soos stays with his abuelita when he isn't working - but after much convincing, the frugal conman finally allowed him to stay in the attic, but only if he earned his keep. Sammy promised to work hard, and so far, Stan wasn't disappointed.
"So this is where you two will be staying," said Sammy, leading the twins to the attic. There was already a fully made bed near the opposite wall, directly underneath the large glass window of the triangle with the single eye. The one-eyed triangle in the window had always freaked Sammy out ever since he first saw it, but he had no idea why. Near the adjacent walls were two more beds, each of them being empty. "I hope you two don't mind sharing a room with me," Sammy said nervously. "Also, the attic can get a little hot and stuffy during the summer, so just let me know and I'll bring an electric fan in here or something. Just don't ask Stan to turn on the air conditioning, though. He can be pretty tight fisted when it comes to paying bills." "Yeah, we figured that out for ourselves, thanks," said Dipper, rolling his eyes. He immediately went to the bed on the left side, while Mabel went straight to the bed on the right side. "Do you two need any help unpacking?," asked Sammy. "Um… thanks, but we're good," said Dipper.
"This attic is amazing. Check out all my splinters!," said Mabel, holding up both of her hands, which were covered in splinters. She still had a huge smile on her face. "Oh, goodness!," cried Sammy, running towards Mabel and frantically checking her hands. "Doesn't that hurt your hands, Mabel?" "Yep, I'm in excruciating pain right now!," said Mabel. The large smile was still plastered on her face. "Just ignore her, Sammy," said Dipper, rolling his eyes again. "Mabel's like that all the time. Trying to understand her would just hurt your head." Mabel stuck out her tongue at him while his back was turned. "Still, this is very serious," said Sammy, taking out a pair of tweezers. "Here, hold still while I take these out for you." Despite having the energy of a million hamsters, Mabel managed to stay completely still while Sammy slowly removed the little splinters from her hands, one by one, before wrapping her hands in some bandages.
Somehow, a goat was able to sneak its way into the attic and stand on top of Dipper's new bed, bleating loudly. "And there's a goat on my bed," said Dipper. "Hey, friend," said Mabel, immediately going to greet the animal. The goat leaned over and began chewing on the sleeve of her sweater, which Mabel didn't seem to mind at all. "Oh! Yes, you can keep chewing on my sweater." Sammy couldn't help but let out a little laugh at the adorable sight, before shooing the goat away. "After you finish unpacking, why don't you two go outside and play around for a while? It's no good for a kid to be cooped up inside all summer," said Sammy. "Unless your name's Dipper. Hey-o!," cheered Mabel, before laughing at her own joke. Dipper only rolled his eyes again before pulling Mabel's sweater over her head with a mischievous smile. "No! I've been betrayed by my own brother! Why?!," Mabel cried dramatically, trying to pull her head back out while Dipper laughed. Sammy just chuckled and shook his head in amusement.
After Dipper and Mabel finished unpacking and setting up their beds, they went outside and played around under the sun, just as Sammy said. Well, Mabel did most of the playing. Dipper just sat in the shade of a large oak tree, writing something in a notebook. "Yay! Grass!," cheered Mabel, rolling down a hill. Sammy stood nearby and kept watch, making sure that the kids didn't accidentally hurt themselves. As Dipper was writing in his notebook, he didn't notice someone creeping up behind him until it was too late. "Boo!," yelled a man in a monster mask, popping out from behind the tree that Dipper was sitting against. "Ah!," cried Dipper, jumping a foot in the air. Sammy, who saw the whole thing coming, couldn't help but laugh at Stan's prank. He remembered when Stan tried doing the same thing to him two days ago. Sammy got so scared that he ended up punching Stan in the face, mistaking him for an actual monster. After that, the conman made sure to stay well away from Sammy's fists. It turned out that Sammy had a mean right hook, despite looking like he just came out of a classroom. Who knew?
"Ahahahaha!," Stan bellowed with laughter, slapping his knee, all while Dipper looked completely unamused by the prank. "Hahaha!" Then, Stan began coughing and thumping on his chest. "It was worth it." Then, he saw Sammy standing nearby. "Alright, thanks for watching the kids for me, but I'll take it from here," he said. "Dillan, Mavis–" "That wasn't even remotely close to our real names," said Dipper, crossing his arms. "-it's time for you two to learn how to earn your keep," Stan continued while completely ignoring Dipper. "Just because it's summer doesn't mean I'll just let you both slouch around like a couple of lazy mooks. If you wanna stay here, then you gotta work." "Aw, what?," whined Mabel, walking up to Stan with grass in her hair. "But Grunkle Stan, it's summer vacation! How am I gonna find my one true love if all I'm doing this summer is working?" "Yeah, and why let Sammy stay in the shack if he doesn't work?," asked Dipper. "Sammy does work," Stan corrected him. "What, did ya think I'd let someone stay in the shack for free? Nah, he keeps watch over my inventory. He earns his keep, and pretty soon, you'll both earn yours." "Grunkle Stan, no offense, but I don't exactly consider running a tourist trap as actual work," said Dipper. "I mean, all you're doing is tricking people into throwing money at you." "...kid, you literally just described the best job that a man could ever have," said Stan. "Now enough horsing around! Get your butts back inside and I'll teach you how to use a broom. And Sammy, check if my order on snow globes and bobbleheads went through."
After that, Dipper and Mabel were given various jobs in the Mystery Shack, like cleaning the attractions, sweeping the floor, some heavy lifting, etc. Of course, Sammy and the twins weren't the only employees to work at the shack. There was also Soos, the handyman, and Wendy, the cashier. Soos was a large, chubby man who wore a green shirt with a question mark on it, and brown cargo shorts, as well as a little cap on top of his head. Sammy couldn't help but think that he looks like a giant mole. Wendy was a teenage girl with red hair, freckles, a plaid shirt, jeans, muddy boots, and a lumberjack hat. She was always very calm and easygoing, which Sammy couldn't help but be slightly envious of. He wished he could also go through life like that, not having a care in the world, only doing what he wants to do…
Stan's job, of course, was to lead the clueless masses through the shack and wow them with his so-called "attractions." Most of them were only different animal parts that had been glued or stitched together and given weirdly creative names. However, most of the tourists seemed to love his attractions anyway, and paid good money just to get a peek at them. Like Dipper once said in bewilderment, "The real mystery was why anyone came."
As Stan led the newest group of tourists through the shack with a big grin on his face, wearing his signature suit, fez, and eyepatch, he stopped in front of one of his more famous attractions. "Ladies and gentlemen, behold! The Sascrotch!," Stan announced, gesturing to the statue in front of him. The Sascrotch was only some kind of realistic ape statue wearing dirty underwear, and yet, the tourists oohed and aahed while snapping photos of it.
Dipper, who was sweeping the floor, could only stare at the tourists in shock, wondering how they could be so enamored by an ape wearing underwear. Mabel looked around and saw a giant, fake eyeball sitting on one of the tables. "Ooh!," she said, reaching for it. However, Stan saw what she was about to do and smacked her hand away with his cane. "No touching the merchandise!," he chastised, before running back to the tourists. Mabel groaned loudly and dramatically collapsed on the floor. "I'm so booooored!," she whined. "Mabel, I can't clean the floor with you laying on it," sighed Dipper, nudging her with his broom. Suddenly, Mabel seemed to get a bright idea. She quickly got up and took out a pen and paper from…somewhere before writing on it frantically with an excited grin on her face. While Soos and Wendy continued on with their work - well, Soos was working, Wendy was only reading a magazine - Dipper and Sammy watched Mabel curiously, wondering what she was up to. Giggling, Mabel folded the paper into an airplane, then hid behind the counter and waited. A few moments later, a boy who was about the same age as Mabel walked through the door, looking around. Mabel threw the paper airplane at him, hitting him in the back of the head. "Ow!," said the boy, before looking down and seeing the paper that Mabel wrote on. He picked it up and unfolded it.
"He's looking at it! He's looking at it!," whispered Mabel. The boy looked at the paper and read from it out loud. "Uh… Do you like me? Yes? Definitely? Absolutely!" He looked around nervously, wondering if he had some kind of stalker. "I rigged it!," said Mabel. "Mabel, I know you're going through your whole 'Boy Crazy' phase, but I think you're kind of overdoing it with the 'crazy' part," sighed Dipper. "What?," cried Mabel, blowing a raspberry. "Come on, Dipper! This is our first summer away from home! It's my big chance to have an epic summer romance!" "Yeah, but do you need to flirt with every guy you meet?," asked Dipper. "You mean this isn't her first time?," asked Sammy. "Nope, not by a long shot," said Dipper, as he began counting on his fingers. "There was the guy she pushed into a card display, the guy with the turtle, that teen with the weird voice who worked at some kind of mattress store…" "Mock all you want, brother, but I got a good feeling about this summer," Mabel said confidently. "I wouldn't be surprised if the man of my dreams walked through that door right now." But as luck would have it, the "man of her dreams" who walked through the door was none other than Stan, carrying a bunch of signs under his arm while holding a can of cola. He burped loudly, but it got caught in his throat. "Oh! Oh, not good. Ow." "Aww! Why!," cried Mabel. Dipper and Sammy couldn't help but laugh. "All right, all right, look alive, people," said Stan. "I need someone to go hammer up these signs in the spooky part of the forest." "Not it!," the twins cried out in unison, raising their hands. "Uh, also not it," said Soos, doing the same thing while balancing himself on a ladder.
"Nobody asked you, Soos," said Stan. "I know, and I'm comfortable with that," said Soos, before he proceeded to take a big bite out of a chocolate bar. "Wendy, I need you to put up this sign!," said Stan. "I would, but I, ugh, can't, ugh, reach it, ugh…," groaned Wendy, though it was obvious that she wasn't even trying. "I'd fire all of you if I could," sighed Stan. "All right, let's make it… eenie, meenie, miney… you." He finally pointed at Dipper, who was less than happy about being picked. "Aw, what? Grunkle Stan, whenever I'm in those woods, I feel like I'm being watched." "Ugh, this again," groaned Stan, pinching the bridge of his nose in irritation. Unlike Mabel, who took everything in stride, Dipper had to question everything, and while Stan usually admired that trait, there was a difference between being inquisitive, and being obsessive. "I'm telling you, something weird is going on in this town," said Dipper. "Just today, my mosquito bites spelled out BEWARE." He rolled up his sleeve and showed his arm to Stan, who looked at the bite marks closely. "That says BEWARB." Dipper took another look at his arm, and sure enough, the word was misspelled. He scratched his arm a little before rolling his sleeve back down in embarrassment. Stan sighed. "Look, kid. The whole 'monsters in the forest' thing is just local legend, drummed up by guys like me to sell merch to guys like that." He pointed at a fat, sweaty man who was playing with one of the Stan bobbleheads while laughing.
"So quit being so paranoid!," said Stan, shoving the signs into Dipper's arms. Dipper sighed, clearly not so enthusiastic about going to the spooky part of the forest. Feeling a little bit of sympathy for him, Sammy decided to intervene. "Um, Mister Pines?," he spoke up. "I could go put up those signs instead of Dipper." Dipper looked at him with a grateful smile, but Stan was quick to put a stop to that. "No, you're staying here, kid," he said. "I want Dipper to put up the signs. It'll help him build some character, or…whatever." Seeing the crestfallen look return on Dipper's face, Sammy quickly thought of another solution. "Uh, then how about Dipper and I put up the signs together?," he suggested. "That would get the job done much faster, don't you think?" Stan thought about it for a moment. "Hmm, I do like where you're going with this, kid… Alright, you can go with Dipper. But if both of you are putting up these signs, then I expect the job to get done twice as fast. Got it?" "Got it!," said Dipper, looking relieved. "Come on, Sammy." The two of them walked out of the shack, with Mabel cheering them on for some reason. "Yeah! Go Dipper! Go Sammy! Put up those signs!" Once the two of them got far enough away from the shack that Mabel's voice could no longer be heard, Dipper looked up at Sammy.
"Thanks for volunteering to go with me," he said. "But you didn't really have to do that. I could put up these signs by myself." "I know," said Sammy. "But you looked scared when Stan mentioned the forest, so I wanted to come with you. You know, to keep you company." Dipper shot him a grateful look. "Thanks," he said again. "Welp, you ready to put up these signs?" "Let's do this," said Sammy, holding up a hammer and a box of nails that Stan gave him.
As they began putting up the signs, Dipper was no longer so scared about being alone in the forest, since he now had Sammy to keep him company. However, that didn't stop him from being upset about Stan not believing him about being watched. "Ugh, Grunkle Stan. Nobody ever believes anything I say," he muttered under his breath. "I believe you," said Sammy. Even though Dipper didn't intend for him to hear that, he still felt his hope rise up. "Wait, really?," he asked, looking up at Sammy. "You believe me even though Stan doesn't?" "Well, don't tell Stan I said this, but I doubt he'd even notice an earthquake happening around him while counting his money," Sammy said in a joking manner. "Heh, good one," Dipper chuckled. "Thanks," said Sammy. "But I get what you're saying. This town may seem pretty normal on the surface, but you also have this feeling that…there's more to Gravity Falls than it seems, am I right?" "Yeah, exactly!," cried Dipper, ecstatic that someone was finally getting him. "I mean, I don't even know how to describe it. I just had this weird feeling the whole time I was here, like I was being… watched or something. Did you ever get that same feeling while you were here?"
"Oh, yes, all the time," said Sammy. "Right! So you know how I feel!," Dipper said with excitement. "I do," said Sammy, nodding his head. "But I also know there's no use in thinking about it too much." "What?," asked Dipper, surprised by what he heard. "But… but…" "Dipper, as weird as this feeling is, that's all it is in the end. A feeling," said Sammy. "We have no solid evidence, no proof that something weird is going on. So for now… why worry about it?"
Even though Dipper could see his reasoning, he was still a little disappointed. "I guess you're right," he sighed, about to put up the last sign. "Still, there's no way that we're both having the same feeling for nothing. There's gotta be a reason for–" Suddenly, a loud clang came from the tree that Dipper tried to hammer the nail into. "Whoa!," he cried, jumping back in alarm. "Did you hear…?" "Do that again!," said Sammy, his eyes wide with shock. Hesitantly, Dipper tapped on the trunk with his hammer, and sure enough, it made a metallic sound, which was definitely not the sound that trees were supposed to make. Dipper wiped away the dust on the "tree", only to reveal what looked like a control panel. He tried one of the switches, but it didn't do anything. Then, he tried the other switch, and a hole opened up in the ground behind them, scaring away the goat that chewed on Mabel's sweater. "What the?," cried Dipper, shocked by what he was seeing. He slowly walked towards the hole, but was suddenly pulled back by Sammy.
"Wait," he said nervously. "We don't even know what's in there. Stay behind me." He slowly walked towards the hole and looked inside, not sure what he was expecting to see in there. What he did not expect to see, however, was a book. And by the looks of it, this wasn't just any book. It was dusty and covered in mud and cobwebs, which indicated that it was in that hole for a very long time, possibly for decades. The golden image of a six fingered hand was imprinted on the front cover, and in the center of that hand was the number three.
Sammy slowly reached in and picked up the book, holding it at arm's length. "Whoa! Is that… a journal?," asked Dipper. Sammy cautiously began flipping through the pages, and his eyes went wide at what he saw. "Huh? …What the heck am I even looking at?," he murmured to himself. Unable to contain himself any longer, Dipper jumped up and snatched the book out of Sammy's hands, then began flipping through it himself. He finally stopped at a random page and began reading it out loud. "It's hard to believe it's been six years since I began studying the strange and wondrous secrets of Gravity Falls, Oregon… What is all this?," he asked, staring at the pages. "I have no idea, Dipper," Sammy replied truthfully. Dipper continued reading the journal. "Unfortunately, my suspicions have been confirmed. I'm being watched. I must hide this book before he finds it. Remember: in Gravity Falls there is no one you can trust." The two of them were silent as they let that slowly sink in for a moment. "No one you can trust…," Dipper murmured. "What do you think that could mean?," asked Sammy, feeling a little anxious. "I don't know, man," said Dipper. "But it doesn't sound good at all. I think we'd better–"
"HALLO!," yelled Mabel, suddenly popping up out of nowhere. "AH!," cried Dipper and Sammy, jumping a foot in the air. "What'cha readin', some nerd thing?," asked Mabel, instantly noticing the journal that Dipper was holding. "Uh, uh, it's nothing!," Dipper stuttered, quickly hiding it behind his back. "Uh, uh, it's nothing!," Mabel mimicked him poorly. "What? Are you actually not gonna show me?" Then, she turned to face Sammy. "Come on, Sammy! I wanna be in on whatever you guys are doing! The Mystery Shack can be sooo boring sometimes!" Seeing that Mabel wasn't about to let this go anytime soon, Sammy sighed. "Dipper, I think we're gonna have to tell her," he said. Suddenly, the goat from earlier came back and began chewing on the corner of the journal that Dipper was still holding. Dipper glanced at the goat, then back at Mabel, who was still smiling obliviously. "Uhhh… Let's go somewhere private."
After that, the three of them went back to the shack and into the living room, making sure that they were all alone first. Then, Dipper began explaining everything to Mabel while pacing in circles, excited by this newest discovery. "It's amazing! Grunkle Stan said I was being paranoid, but according to this book, Gravity Falls has this secret dark side." Mabel gasped dramatically. "Whoa! Shut. Up!," she said, pushing Dipper. "And get this!," Dipper continued. "After a certain point, the pages just… stop, like the guy who was writing it… mysteriously disappeared." "I don't know, you two," Sammy said nervously. "Doesn't that bother you? The author just vanished one day with no explanation as to why? And how do we know that this book is even authentic? For all we know, it could all be written by some prankster with a crazy imagination. I mean, look at this." He took the journal from Dipper and showed them some random pages. "Leprechorn? Stomach faced duck? The squash with human face and emotions? You can't tell me that you actually believe any of this." "Come on, Sammy, of course it's authentic!," said Dipper, snatching the book back. "Do you really think someone would put this much effort into a prank? And look at how worn out the pages are! This thing has to have been written years ago. Maybe even decades! Guys, this is the find of a lifetime! Imagine what we could find with this journal by our side! All the secrets about Gravity Falls we could unlock!" Suddenly, the doorbell rang, which was a bit odd, since any tourist who wanted to see the shack only had to walk in.
"Who's that?," asked Dipper. "Well, time to spill the beans," said Mabel, before tipping over a can of beans that happened to be on the table. "Boop. Beans. This girl's got a date! Woot woot!" Giggling, Mabel flopped down on the couch and looked up at the ceiling. "Let me get this straight," said Dipper. "In the half hour I was gone, you already found a boyfriend?" "What can I say? I guess I'm just IRRESISTIBLLLLE!," said Mabel, flapping her long sleeves around. Then, the doorbell rang again. "Oh. Coming!" She ran to get the door, leaving Dipper and Sammy on their own. "I guess I should've expected that Mabel wouldn't take any of this seriously," sighed Dipper. "But hey, isn't this great? It's like we're in a mystery novel now. I've always wanted to be in one of those." Sammy sighed. "Dipper, it's cool that you find this so exciting, but… don't you think you're taking this a little too far?" "What do you mean?," asked Dipper. "Well… it seems to me that you're all too ready to believe everything inside of that book," said Sammy. "I'm just worried that you might be biting off more than you can chew." Dipper groaned in frustration. "Why are you so convinced that this journal is fake?," he asked in exasperation. "I thought you'd be on board with this. I thought we had a connection back in the forest. But… well, I guess I was wrong." Dipper sat on the couch with a huff and began reading from the journal again, not even noticing the wounded expression on Sammy's face. Suddenly, Stan walked into the room while drinking cola. "What'cha reading there, slick?," he asked, noticing the journal.
Panicking, Dipper quickly hid the journal under the cushions and picked up a random magazine from the table. "Oh! I was just catching up on, uh…" Realizing that he had no idea which magazine he picked, Dipper flipped to the front cover and recoiled at what he saw. "Gold Chains For Old Men Magazine?" "That's a good issue," said Stan, nodding his head. Of course, the conman knew that Dipper was hiding something. Just because he was old didn't mean that he was also blind. But Stan also knew that young boys like Dipper needed their privacy, and who was he to take that away? Suddenly, Mabel ran back into the living room, dragging another person along with her. "Hey, family! Say hello to my new boyfriend!" Mabel turned the person around, allowing everyone else to see his face. He was tall and lanky, with a black hoodie, ripped jeans, and an extremely pale face that almost looked uncanny. "'Sup?," he said casually. "Hey…," said Dipper, immediately on his guard. "Hello!," Sammy said in a friendly manner. "How's it hanging?," greeted Stan. "We met at the cemetery," said Mabel. "He's really deep." Then, for some reason, she decided to pinch the teen's arm and was flustered by what she felt. "Oh. Little muscle there. That's… what a surprise…" "So, what's your name?," asked Dipper. The teen panicked a little, his eyes darting left and right. "Uh. Normal… MAN!," he replied in a loud voice. "He means Norman," said Mabel. "Are you bleeding, Norman?," asked Dipper, noticing the red stain on his face. Norman stared at Dipper with blank eyes. "It's jam," he said slowly. "Are you sure?," Sammy asked with concern. "You can tell us if you're hurt. I have a first aid kit somewhere upstairs." This only made Norman even more nervous. "No!," he said loudly. "Not hurt! Uh… it's really jam. Not blood. Just jam. Don't need… first aid kit…"
"And I love jam! Look. At. This!," cried Mabel. "So, you wanna go hold hands or… whatever?," Norman asked Mabel. "Oh, oh, my goodness," said Mabel, feeling a little flustered. "Don't wait up!" She then ran out of the living room. Norman stayed behind a bit to point at them, then followed after Mabel, but strangely enough, he crashed into the doorframe several times before making it out. Even more oddly, he seemed completely unfazed, even though he banged his head against the wall. "Wow, kids these days just get weirder and weirder," sighed Stan, shaking his head. Suddenly, Sammy felt Dipper tugging his arm. "Uh, hey, Sammy? I need to have a word with you. Just the two of us. Alone." "Um… okay?," said Sammy, not sure why Dipper wanted to be alone with him so badly. Dipper quickly pulled the journal out from under the cushions, grabbed Sammy's hand, and ran out of the room while pulling him along, leaving a confused Stan. "Huh, that was weird," he muttered. "I wonder if I should check on them and see if they're alright… Ha! Good thing I don't really care." He plopped himself down onto the couch and proceeded to finish the newest issue of Gold Chains for Old Men Magazine.
Meanwhile, Dipper dragged Sammy into the attic and closed the door behind them. "I'm not the only one who thinks that there's something wrong with Norman, right?," he immediately asked. "Oh… that's what you wanted to talk about?," asked Sammy. "This is serious, Sammy!," Dipper groaned. "I mean, you were there. You saw how weird Norman was acting. He doesn't even seem like he's human!" "Now Dipper, I think you're being a little too harsh on that guy," said Sammy. "Just because he looks and acts a little weird doesn't mean that there's something wrong with him." "No, no, no, there's definitely something about that guy that sets me on edge," Dipper argued, frantically pacing around in circles. "Everything about him is just… wrong. He's super pale, constantly bumps into things, and he has blood on his face. Blood!"
"He said it was jam, though," Sammy argued weakly. "And do you actually believe him?," asked Dipper, raising an eyebrow. The silence that came from Sammy was the only answer that Dipper needed to continue. "There's gotta be some way to find out who or what he is," he said, before his eyes slowly landed on the journal that he was holding. "Dipper, you can't honestly think that there's something in this book that'll help you," Sammy protested. "First of all, it's a journal, not a book," Dipper corrected him. "And second, I think I've seen something in this that might actually help us." He sat down on his bed and quickly flipped through the pages until he found the one that he was looking for. Then, he began to read it out loud. "Known for their pale skin and bad attitudes these creatures are often mistaken for… teenagers?! Beware Gravity Falls's nefarious…" Dipper gasped, seeing the drawing of an undead creature staring back at him. Even more frightening, the drawing seemed to resemble Norman himself.
"ZOMBIE!," screamed Dipper. "Ow! Goodness!," Sammy hissed, rubbing his ears painfully. "Dipper, we're inside. Use your inside voice, please!" Dipper, however, couldn't care less about nearly blowing out Sammy's eardrums with his high pitched scream. Instead, he shoved the open journal at Sammy's face. "Look, look!," he cried frantically. "See that drawing? That's totally Norman! Norman's a zombie! My sister's dating a zombie!" "Dipper, calm down!," huffed Sammy, pushing the book away. "What are you talking about? Norman's not a zombie." "Yes, he is!," Dipper insisted. "Just read it!" Sammy sighed in frustration, but decided to humor Dipper for now and quickly skimmed over what Dipper just read. "This is only describing what we already know about zombies from horror movies and video games," he said. "Anyone could have written this." "Ugh, Sammy, come on!," groaned Dipper, snatching the journal back. "What happened to all that stuff we talked about in the forest, about Gravity Falls being more than what it seems? How are zombies any different from that?" "Dipper," sighed Sammy, rubbing his head tiredly. "Speculating about being watched is one thing, but judging someone based on what you read in an old journal is something else entirely. I'm sorry, Dipper, but that's where I draw the line." Dipper opened his mouth to argue, but then, he finally realized what Sammy was trying to tell him. "...oh," he said quietly. "So this whole time… I've been judging Norman without even trying to get to know him… geez, now I feel like a huge jerk." "Now, I wouldn't go that far," said Sammy, patting Dipper on the shoulder. "You just got carried away for a moment. It happens to everyone." "Yeah, you're right," sighed Dipper. "Maybe I should give Norman a chance. I mean, just because he spooked me out a little doesn't mean that he's a zom–" Before he could finish his sentence, Dipper happened to glance out the window, and he saw Mabel and Norman right outside of the shack. Mabel was sitting on a bench and smiling obliviously while Norman was slowly lumbereing towards her with his arms outstretched, reaching for her neck.
"Oh, no! Mabel!," cried Dipper, banging on the window. "Dipper?!," asked Sammy, alarmed by what was going on. "Dipper, what is it? What's going on outside?" "It's Mabel!," yelled Dipper. "She's outside with Norman, and Norman's about to strangle her!" "Wait, what?!," cried Sammy, quickly joining Dipper at the window. When he saw what Dipper was seeing, he also began banging on the window. "Mabel, get out of here! Get back into the shack!" However, Mabel couldn't hear them both screaming and banging at the window, so she made no move to escape, even as Norman got closer and closer to her. "No, no, Mabel, watch out!," cried Dipper, terrified for his sister's safety. Finally, Norman wrapped his cold fingers around Mabel's throat, causing Dipper and Sammy to scream in horror. But it turned out that there was nothing to fear, because when Norman took a step back, it was revealed that he only put a flower necklace around her neck. Dipper and Sammy sighed in relief. "I won't lie, that really scared me," said Sammy, slumping down on his bed. "Why?," asked Dipper. "I thought you didn't believe in zombies." "No, but I still thought Norman was going to hurt Mabel," said Sammy.
Dipper sighed and looked out the window again, seeing Mabel and Norman talking and laughing together. "Is my sister really dating a zombie, or am I just going nuts?," he asked. "It's a dilemma, to be sure," said a third voice in the room, causing Sammy and Dipper to scream and jump in alarm. Fortunately, it was only Soos, who was trying to screw in a lightbulb. "I couldn't help but overhear you talkin' aloud to yourselves in this empty room." "Uh, Soos… how did you even get in here? We didn't even see you come in," asked Sammy. "Oh, I have my ways," said Soos. He didn't elaborate any further on that. "Soos, you've seen Mabel's boyfriend too," said Dipper. "He's gotta be a zombie, right?" "Hmm. How many brains didja see the guy eat?," asked Soos. "Zero," sighed Dipper, looking down in disappointment. "Look, dude, I believe you," said Soos. "I'm always noticing weird stuff in this town. Like the mailman? Pretty sure that dude's a werewolf." "Or he could just be a very hairy man," Sammy countered. Soos thought about it for a moment. "Huh, maybe… or maybe he only wants you to think that. But the point is, ya gotta have evidence. Otherwise, people are gonna think you're a major league cuckoo clock." "As always, Soos, you're right," said Dipper. "My wisdom is both a blessing and a curse," said Soos, nodding his head like a wise sage. "Soos! The portable toilets are clogged again!," Stan hollered from downstairs. "I am needed elsewhere," said Soos, before slowly backing out of the attic. "All right, I don't know about you, but I am 100% convinced that Norman is a zombie," said Dipper. "But like Soos said, I also need evidence. That's why…" He reached into his vest and took out a camera that he had been keeping in there for some time. "...I'm going to follow them and record Norman's every move. We're bound to get something on this camera that would back up my claims!" Sammy sighed. "Dipper, I'm not so sure if that's a good idea," he said.
"What? Why not?," asked Dipper. "We need evidence to prove that Norman's a zombie and warn Mabel about–" "Dipper!," groaned Sammy. "Zombies. Aren't. Real." He took a deep breath to calm himself down before continuing. "Dipper, I'm genuinely worried that this journal is filling up your head with crazy notions and ideas. I think the best thing for you to do right now is to put it back where you found it and forget that it ever existed." "What? No way!," said Dipper, hugging the journal to his chest protectively. "Look, you may not believe what's written in this journal, but I do. And if Mabel's really dating a zombie, then as her brother, it's my job to look out for her and make sure that her brains don't get eaten. Now I'm gonna follow them into town and record everything, and I can do that with or without you. So what's it gonna be?"
"Dipper… I just don't want to see you and Mabel get hurt," sighed Sammy. "I promised Stan that I would look after both of you whenever he can't, and I want to keep that promise. But I can't help you… if you won't let me." Dipper felt a wave of guilt wash over him, but he tried his best to ignore it. Now was not the time to be feeling guilty. Now was the time for action.
"Sorry, Sammy," said Dipper, placing the camera back inside his vest. "I have to go with my gut on this one. But… thanks, anyway." Then, Dipper walked out of the room and slammed the door shut behind him. Sammy looked out of the window and saw Norman and Mabel going into town while holding each other's hands. A few moments later, he saw Dipper sneaking after them, holding his camera out. Sighing heavily, Sammy laid down on his bed and looked up at the ceiling gloomily. "Well… so much for connecting with the twins," he murmured.
After taking an hour long nap, Sammy was woken up when Mabel entered the room with a bright smile on her face, slamming the door open. "Whoohoo!," she cheered, jumping onto her bed while laughing and giggling. "Hey, Mabel," Sammy replied sleepily, rubbing his eyes. "How'd your date with Norman go?" "It was awesome!," cried Mabel. "We threw a frisbee together, ate at a diner, and visited a graveyard! Norman even smashed a window for me! Doesn't that just sound romantic?" "He… smashed a window for you?," asked Sammy, raising an eyebrow. "Yeah!," said Mabel. "How else was he gonna reach the doorknob on the other side?"
After rubbing the sleep from his eyes, Sammy suddenly noticed a red mark on Mabel's face. Fearing the worst, he gasped and ran to her, checking her face. "What happened to you?! Did Norman do this to you?! Did he hit you?!" "What? No!," said Mabel, alarmed by Sammy's reaction. "Norman's a sweetheart! He'd never hit me!" "But… but what's that red mark on your face, then?," asked Sammy. Mabel looked confused for a moment, then smiled sheepishly. "Oh, that," she said. "That was just from kissing practice. I put a photo of Norman up to a leaf blower and tried to smooch it… but my face got stuck in the tube…" "...oh," said Sammy, feeling much more relieved. "Um, Sammy… why would you think that Norman would ever hurt me?," asked Mabel, frowning a little. Sammy thought back to when he and Dipper saw Norman giving Mabel that flower necklace, but to them, it looked more like he was about to strangle her. Just the way he lunged at her, the way his fingers almost wrapped themselves around her throat…
"N-nothing. Never mind. It's-it's nothing," Sammy sighed. Mabel, however, was not at all convinced. She could tell that Sammy was upset about something, but she didn't want to make it worse by pushing the issue. So instead, she tried to find some other way to cheer him up. "Hey, Sammy?," she asked. "Do you mind if I brush your hair?" "Why would you want to brush my hair?," asked Sammy. "Well, I remember that brushing my own hair as a little kid always made me feel better when I was feeling down," Mabel explained. "It might make you feel better too." Sammy couldn't help but smile gratefully. "I've never had anyone brush my hair before, but it could be relaxing. Sure, go for it." Squealing with excitement, Mabel immediately took out a hairbrush and began slowly brushing Sammy's hair. For someone with so much energy, she was surprisingly gentle. But then, a few moments later, Dipper suddenly barged into the room, which frightened Mabel into tugging at Sammy's hair. "Ow!," cried Sammy. "Sorry, sorry!," Mabel apologized frantically, carefully untangling the brush from his hair. "What the heck, bro bro? You scared me!" "Yeah, sorry about that," said Dipper, not really sounding that sorry. "But Mabel, we've gotta talk about Norman." "Isn't he the best? Check out this giant smooch mark he gave me!," said Mabel, showing him the red mark on her cheek. "Ah!," cried Dipper, who was just as shocked as Sammy was. "Ha, ha! Gullible. It was just an accident with a leaf blower!," said Mabel. "That was fun." "No, Mabel, listen!," groaned Dipper, taking out the journal. "I'm trying to tell you that Norman is not what he seems!" Of course, Mabel took that in a completely different way. "You think he might be a vampire?," she gasped. "That would be so awesome!"
"Guess again, sister. SHA-BAM!," yelled Dipper, showing her a page from the journal. "Agh!," cried Mabel, recoiling. "Uh, Dipper," said Sammy. "You're on the wrong page." Dipper looked at where he had flipped and realized that he accidentally showed Mabel a page about gnomes instead. "Oh, wait. I'm-I'm sorry… Sha-bam!," he said, quickly flipping to the page about zombies. "A zombie?," groaned Mabel. "That is not funny, Dipper." "I'm not joking!," cried Dipper, pacing in circles. "It all adds up: the bleeding, the limp. He never blinks! Have you noticed that?" "Maybe he's blinking when you're blinking," Mabel suggested. "Mabel, remember what the book said about Gravity Falls?," asked Dipper. "Trust no one!" "Well, what about me and Sammy, huh?," asked Mabel. "Why can't you trust us?" Then, she put on star shaped earrings to ease the tension. "Beep bop!" Finally, Dipper could no longer contain his frustration. "Mabel, he's gonna eat your brain!," he yelled, shaking Mabel by the shoulders. "Whoa, Dipper!," Sammy exclaimed, running over and separating them. "Calm down!" "Dipper, listen to me," said Mabel, her face turning serious. "Norman and I are going on a date at five o' clock, and I'm gonna be ADORABLE, and he's gonna be DREAMY–" "Bu-bu-but–," Dipper tried to protest as Mabel angrily pushed him out of the room. "And I'm not gonna let you ruin it with one of your crazy CONSPIRACIES!," yelled Mabel, slamming the door in Dipper's face. Then, she stomped to her bed and face planted into the mattress. "Are you alright, Mabel?," asked Sammy. Mabel sighed and sat back up. "I just don't get it," she said sadly. "Why is Dipper like this? Why does he have to ruin everything?" "Mabel, I'm sure that Dipper's not trying to ruin your relationship with Norman," Sammy reassured her. "He's just worried about his sister, that's all."
"I know. I just wish he could stop it with the conspiracies, you know?," said Mabel. "He was pretty obsessed with them before, but I think it's gotten worse ever since he found that dumb journal." Sammy couldn't help but nod in agreement. He and Dipper had gotten along with each other quite well before, but after Dipper found that journal, it was as if he had found a new calling, and one that didn't involve the other people in his life. Sammy began to wonder if maybe he should take the journal away from him, and by force if necessary. After all, there was no way that burying your nose in an old book about zombies and gnomes all summer could possibly be healthy for a young mind like Dipper's. Suddenly, the doorbell rang downstairs. In a flash, Mabel was back on her feet with a big smile on her face. "It's him! Norman's back!," she cried.
"Already?," asked Sammy, raising an eyebrow. "But you just came back." "I know, but me and Norman had so much fun on our last date that we decided to go on a second date right after!," said Mabel. She immediately began rifling through her pile of clothes before picking out and putting on one of her sweaters. "Okay, Sammy, be honest. How do I look?," she asked. Her new sweater was purple and covered in sparkles, and it even had a picture of a cat's face on it. "You look adorable," he answered truthfully. "Great! That's just what I was going for!," exclaimed Mabel. "Welp, wish me luck!" Before she could run out the door, however, Sammy stopped her by yelling out, "Wait!" Mabel stopped in her tracks and looked over her shoulder. "Yeah? What is it, Sammy?," she asked curiously. "Before you go, I just want to say that… if Norman gets too forceful, or… wants you to do something that you're not comfortable with… just tell him 'no.' And be very firm about it," said Sammy. "Um…okay?," said Mabel, a bit confused. "Is there anything else you wanna tell me?" But Sammy shook his head, although he still looked a little worried. "No, that's about it. Have fun on your date with Norman… your second date, anyway."
The doorbell rang again. "Coming!," Mabel hollered, running out of the attic and down the stairs. She didn't notice Dipper sitting on a couch nearby, watching the footage that he got on his camera. Mabel opened the door to reveal Norman standing outside. "Hey, Norman. How do I look?," she asked, showing off her new cat sweater. "Shiny…," said Norman, staring at it in awe. "You always know what to say!," said Mabel, giggling. The two of them left the shack, but this time, they went off into the woods instead of the town. Dipper watched them leave, sighed, and looked back at his camera. He had been watching his recording for a while, but did not see anything that could prove that Norman was a zombie. He was honestly starting to wonder if he really was overreacting. "Hey, Dipper," said Sammy, sitting next to him. "Did you get anything on that camera?" Dipper sighed. "Other than the two of them having fun like any normal people would? Nothing," he said gloomily. "I'm sorry you couldn't find anything," said Sammy.
"You don't have to apologize. You and Soos were right," sighed Dipper, still watching the recordings on his camera. "I don't have any real evidence. I guess I can be kind of paranoid sometimes and–" "Wait, hold on!," cried Sammy, seeing something on the camera that made his blood freeze. "Did you see that?" "Huh? See what?," asked Dipper. "Rewind the footage!," said Sammy. "Come on, do it!" Dipper began to rewind the recording before stopping at the part where Norman had his arm wrapped around Mabel. To their shock, they saw Norman's hand fall off, and even more shocking, they saw Norman pick up his hand and reattach it to his wrist. They were both so shocked by what they saw that they tipped the chair backwards. Neither of them got hurt, fortunately. "I was right! Oh my god! Oh my god!," cried Dipper, hyperventilating. "Dipper, calm down!," said Sammy. He was also shocked by what he just saw, but he knew that freaking out about it was not going to accomplish anything. "Okay, first thing's first. We need to tell Mister Pines what's going on." "Yeah, good idea! He'll know what to do!," said Dipper. The two of them ran outside and saw Stan standing in front of a large crowd of tourists.
"Grunkle Stan! Grunkle Stan! Grunkle Stan!," yelled Dipper, trying to get his great uncle's attention. However, Stan was too busy dealing with the tourists to even notice him. "And here we have Rock that looks like a face rock: the rock that looks like a face," the conman boasted, gesturing to a rock that was carved into the shape of a human face, sitting on a pedestal. "Does it look like a rock?," asked a hillbilly. "No, it looks like a face," Stan corrected him. "Is it a face?," asked a rather fat tourist. "It's a rock that looks like a face!," groaned Stan, beginning to lose his patience with the dimwitted crowd. "Over here! Grunkle Stan!," yelled Dipper. "Mister Pines, we need you!," yelled Sammy. "For the fifth time! It's-it's not an actual face!," yelled Stan, still not noticing either of them. "Errrgh!," groaned Dipper. "Stan! Stan!" Then, he saw Wendy driving up in a golf cart. "Of course! Come on, Sammy!," said Dipper, running towards Wendy while pulling Sammy along. When Wendy saw the two of them approach her, she just stood there with her arms crossed, waiting for an explanation. "Wendy! Wendy! Wendy! We need to borrow the golf cart so we can save my sister from a zombie!," cried Dipper. Wendy still didn't say anything, but the calm smile on her face indicated that she wasn't really taking him too seriously.
"Look, I know it's hard to believe, but we really need that golf cart," begged Sammy. "His sister could be in grave danger and we need to–" "Okay," Wendy said casually. Sammy paused. "Wait, what?," he asked. Wendy just smirked and handed Sammy the keys to the golf cart. "Try not to hit any pedestrians," she said jokingly, before walking away. Sammy and Dipper wasted no time after that. The two of them quickly got into the golf cart and began to drive away, but were suddenly stopped by Soos. "Dude, it's me: Soos. This is for the zombies," he said, giving them a shovel. "Thanks," said Dipper, taking the shovel. "And this is in case you see a pinata," said Soos, giving them a baseball bat. "Uh… Thanks?," asked Dipper, taking the bat as well. "Better safe than sorry!," Soos hollered as Sammy drove away into the woods.
"Don't worry, Mabel! We'll save you from that zombie!," yelled Dipper. "Now, now, let's be a little more optimistic," said Sammy, even though he was just as terrified as Dipper. "We could be wrong. Maybe Norman's just a normal guy. Maybe–" Sammy couldn't finish his sentence though, because what he and Dipper saw next shocked them into silence. Reaching a clearing in the middle of the woods, they saw Mabel being surrounded and held down by a bunch of little men. "The more you struggle, the more awkward this is gonna be for everybody!," said what appeared to be the leader of the group. "Just, ha, ha, okay. Get her arm there, Steve!" "Let go of me!," cried Mabel, trying and failing to shake them off. "...or maybe Norman could be a bunch of little men with pointy hats," said Sammy, staring at the sight in front of them with shock. "Yeah, that could also be a possibility…" "What the heck is going on here?!," cried Dipper.
"Dipper! Sammy!," cried Mabel. "Norman turned out to be a bunch of gnomes! And they're total jerks!" Suddenly, one of the gnomes began pulling on her hair. "Hair! Hair! Hair!" "Gnomes?," asked Dipper. "Huh, we were way off." He took out the journal again and began reading the section about gnomes. "Gnomes: little men of the Gravity Falls Forest. Weaknesses: unknown." The two of them looked up to see Mabel now tied down with a bunch of ropes. "Aw, come on!," she groaned. Suddenly overtaken with fury, Dipper jumped out of the golf cart with the shovel and stomped towards the gnomes. "Dipper, wait!," said Sammy, reaching out to him worriedly. "Hey, HEY! Let go of my sister!," yelled Dipper, glaring down at the leader. "Oh! Ha ha, hey, there!," said the leader, looking up at him nervously. "Um, you know, this is all really just a big misunderstanding. You see, your sister's not in danger. She's just marrying all one thousand of us and becoming our gnome queen for all eternity! Isn't that right, honey?" "You guys are butt-faces!," yelled Mabel, before being muffled by one of the gnomes. "Mmmm-MMMMM!" "Give her back right now, or else!," growled Dipper, brandishing his shovel. "You think you can stop us, boy?," growled the gnome. "You have no idea what we're capable of. The gnomes are a powerful race! Do not trifle with the–" Unimpressed from being threatened by a little man who barely even reached his knee, Dipper tossed the gnome away with his shovel. Then, he cut Mabel loose. The gnomes tried to pin her back down, but Mabel managed to push them off of her. Then, the twins got into the golf cart with Sammy, who started driving away.
"They're getting away with our queen! No, no, no!," yelled the leader. As they drove away, Mabel looked back to see if they were being followed. "Hurry, before they come after us!," she said urgently. "I don't want to go over the speed limit, though," said Sammy. "What speed limit?! We're in a forest!," cried Mabel. "Eh, I wouldn't really worry about it if I were you," Dipper chuckled. "See their little legs? Those suckers are tiny!" Suddenly, they heard loud, stomping noises coming from behind them, and felt the ground tremble. Even the trees started shaking, causing the birds to fly away. Then, a giant gnome-like creature stumbled out from behind the trees, though it was actually all of the gnomes clumped together to form a much bigger one, with the leader of the gnomes sitting at the top of its head. "Dang," gasped Mabel.
"All right, teamwork, guys. Like we practiced," said the gnome leader. The amalgamation of gnomes roared and lifted up its large hand, about to crush the golf cart. "Move, MOVE!," cried Mabel. Sammy quickly drove away just as the creature slammed its hand down. The hand broke back into smaller gnomes, but the gnomes quickly reassembled themselves. "Come back with our queen!," yelled the leader, running after them. "It's getting closer!," cried Mabel. "I'm driving as fast as I can!," said Sammy. Then, the giant gnome creature threw several of the smaller gnomes at the golf cart. The gnomes grabbed onto the cart and began tearing it apart with their hands and teeth. One of them hung from the side of the cart to get at Mabel, but Mabel quickly punched the gnome off. Another gnome with a messy beard tried to attack Dipper from behind, but Dipper grabbed him by the beard and repeatedly punched him in the face. "Shmebulock…," the gnome groaned, before Dipper tossed the gnome off. Yet another gnome popped up in front of Sammy and tried to take control of the steering wheel, but Sammy poked the gnome's eyes with his fingers, bashed his head against the side of the golf cart, and threw him off with one arm. "Sorry!," he called after the falling gnome, feeling a little bad for hurting him.
Suddenly, just when it seemed like there were no more gnomes left, a gnome jumped onto Dipper's face and began scratching him with his nails. "I'll save you, Dipper!," yelled Mabel, before punching the gnome off his face. The gnome fell on the floor of the golf cart and hissed at them, ready to attack again, but Sammy quickly grabbed him by the ear and threw him off as well. "Sorry!," he said to that gnome as well. "Thanks, guys…," said Dipper, dazed while sporting a few scratches and a black eye, but otherwise, he was fine. "Don't mention it," said Sammy. Suddenly, the giant gnome creature ripped a tree out from the ground and threw it at them with inhuman strength. The tree flew right over their heads and landed in front of them, blocking their path. "Look out!," cried Mabel, pointing ahead. Sammy tried to steer away from the tree, but the golf cart ended up tipping over and rolled down the side of a hill. "AAAAAAHHHHHH!," they all screamed in unison as they clung on for dear life. Eventually, the cart landed right in front of the Mystery Shack. Miraculously, none of them were hurt too badly by the crash. Coughing, the three of them crawled out of the totaled golf cart. "Are you two okay?," Sammy asked worriedly, quickly checking the twins for wounds. "Are either of you hurt?" "We're fine," said Dipper. "It's those guys we need to worry about." Right on cue, the giant gnome creature caught up to them, towering over them menacingly. "Stay back, man!," yelled Dipper, throwing his shovel at them. However, the gnome giant easily punched the shovel to the ground in mid-air.
"Aaahhh!," the group cried out, grabbing each other. "Uh, where's Grunkle Stan?!," asked Dipper. "I-I don't know!," cried Sammy. "It's the end of the line, kids!," the gnome leader yelled from atop the gnome creature. "Mabel, marry us before we do something crazy!" "There's gotta be a way out of this!," said Dipper, taking out the journal and frantically flipping through it. Suddenly, the gnome giant reached over and plucked the journal from Dipper's hands with two fingers. "Dipper, your journal!," cried Mabel. "Hey, that's mine!," Dipper yelled angrily. "Give it back!" The gnomes paid him no attention. Instead, the giant held the journal up for the leader to see. "What is this?," asked the leader, reading its pages. Then, he started laughing. "Ha ha ha! Hold on, hold on! Are you telling me… *snrk* Are you telling me that you thought you could find a way to beat us from this stupid book? Ha ha ha ha ha!" The other gnomes laughed along with him, causing Dipper's face to turn red with anger and embarrassment. "Give the journal back right now, man! I'm warning you!," he yelled. "I don't think you're in a position to negotiate, kid," the leader said mockingly. Then, the gnome giant proceeded to do the unthinkable. It took the journal between its large fingers… and tore it into shreds with its bare hands.
Dipper could only stand there and watch as the shreds of paper fell down like snow, feeling a dark emptiness grow inside of him. "What is wrong with you?!," yelled Mabel. "Dipper loved that journal!" But it was clear that none of the gnomes cared a fig about Dipper's feelings. Sammy stared at Dipper, who looked like he was about to cry, then at the gnomes, who weren't showing any remorse for what they just did. He clenched his hands into fists as he felt a deep and dark anger well up inside of him. At that moment, he wanted nothing more than to tear those stupid gnomes apart limb from limb. But he quickly calmed himself down by taking a few deep breaths. No, he had to remain calm. He had to think about this rationally.
"It's time to make up your mind, Mabel!," said the leader. "Marry us now, or we're gonna–" "Wait!," said Sammy, interrupting him. "Ugh, what is it?," the leader groaned, glaring down at Sammy. "Listen, uh… Norman?," said Sammy. "It's Jeff," the gnome leader corrected him. "Right, Jeff. Look, we don't need to resort to violence here," said Sammy. "Can't we just sit down and talk about this?" "Oh, sure!," said Jeff, suddenly sporting a wide grin. "We can talk about it. Heck, we'll even go back to the forest and bring back some strawberry jam for all of us to share." "Really?," Sammy asked hopefully. "NO!," the gnome giant roared, stomping on the ground so hard that it made Sammy lose his balance. Then, the gnome creature reached down and picked Sammy up, its giant fingers wrapped around Sammy's arms and torso.
"Sammy!," Dipper and Mabel cried out in unison, looking up at him with fear. "It's-it's okay!," Sammy tried to reassure them. "Everything will be fine!" "Oh, I wouldn't really say that," Jeff said menacingly. "Listen up, Mabel! I tried to be patient with you, but if you don't make your decision in the next five minutes, we're gonna squeeze your little friend into a pulp!" The twins gasped in horror at what they heard. "Oh, goodness," Sammy whimpered, not finding the idea of being squeezed into a pulp too appealing. A look of pure terror could be seen on Mabel's face, but that was instantly replaced with a look of determination. "I gotta do it," she said.
"What?! Mabel, don't do this! Are you crazy?," cried Dipper. "Trust me," said Mabel. "What?," Dipper asked. "Dipper, just this once. Trust me!," said Mabel. Dipper looked like he wanted to argue, but then, he looked up at Sammy, who was still trapped in the gnome giant's enclosed fist. Sammy was obviously trying to hide his fear, but deep down, he was terrified. It's my fault, Dipper realized. Sammy didn't even want to be involved in this, but I dragged him into it anyway. He looked at Mabel, who was slowly nodding her head. Realizing that there was no other choice, Dipper sighed and took a step back. "All right, Jeff. I'll marry you," said Mabel. "Hot dog!," Jeff cheered, as the gnome giant stomped its foot down in celebration. Then, Jeff began climbing down the giant's body. "Help me down there, Jason! Thanks, Andy! All right, left foot, there we go, watch those fingers, Mike." Once Jeff was on the ground, he ran up to Mabel and held out a diamond ring. "Eh? Eh?," he said, pointing at it while wagging his eyebrows. Mabel pretended to be flustered as she let Jeff put the ring on her finger. "Bada-bing, bada-bam! Now let's get you back into the forest, honey!," said Jeff, about to walk away with his new prize. "You may now kiss the bride!," said Mabel, stopping the gnome in his tracks. Jeff didn't expect things to go like this so quickly, but… well, who was he to complain? "Well, don't mind if I do," said the gnome, leaning in for a kiss. Mabel leaned in as well, but at the last moment, she suddenly took out a leaf blower and aimed it at Jeff's face. "Ah! Hey, hey, wait a minute!," cried Jeff, trying to escape the leaf blower's suction. "Whoa, whoa! Wh-what's goin' on?!" But the suction was too powerful and Jeff got sucked into the leaf blower with only his head being exposed.
"That's for lying to me!," yelled Mabel, before turning up the leaf blower's suction with a turn of the dial. "THAT'S for breaking my heart!" "Ow! My face!," cried Jeff, being sucked into the leaf blower even further. "And THIS is for messing with my brother, AND my new best friend!," yelled Mabel, aiming the leaf blower at the gnome creature. "Wanna do the honors?," she asked Dipper. Dipper smiled and held the leaf blower with Mabel. "On three!," he said loudly. "One, two, three!," the twins yelled together, shooting Jeff out of the leaf blower and right at the gnome creature. Upon impact, the creature immediately collapsed back into a group of smaller gnomes while Jeff continued flying off into the distance. "I'll get you back for this!...," hollered Jeff, before disappearing into the horizon. Sammy was immediately released from the giant's grip and fell to the ground, but fortunately, the landing wasn't too rough. Without their leader, all of the gnomes left behind were in a state of panic and chaos. "Who's giving orders? I need orders!," yelled one of the gnomes. "My arms are tired," groaned another gnome. None of them had time to recover before the twins started threatening them with the leaf blower again. "Anyone else want some?," asked Dipper. The gnomes screeched and scattered away on all fours. One unlucky gnome got his arms and legs caught in a plastic six-pack holder before being picked up and carried away by the goat. After they were all gone, the twins quickly ran to Sammy, who was slowly getting back up while stretching his back painfully. "Sammy!," they cried, hugging his legs.
"Hey, guys," said Sammy, hugging them back. "You two did great! Those gnomes had no idea who they were messing with." "I know, it was so awesome!," cried Mabel. "Jeff was all like, 'I'll get you back for this' and Dipper was all like, 'Anyone else want some' and all those gnomes were going, 'Help, help, we're all gonna die' and-and-and–" "Okay, Mabel, I think Sammy gets the point," Dipper chuckled, but looked up at Sammy in worry. "You're not hurt though, are you?" "I'm fine," said Sammy. That wasn't completely true, though. His back was aching quite a bit from the fall, but the twins didn't need to know that. "Hey, Dipper?," asked Mabel. "I, um… I'm sorry for ignoring your advice. You really were just looking out for me." "Oh, don't be like that. You saved our butts back there," said Dipper. "I guess I'm just sad that my first boyfriend turned out to be a bunch of gnomes," sighed Mabel, looking down at her feet. "Look on the bright side," said Dipper. "Maybe the next one will be a vampire!" "Oh, you're just saying that!," said Mabel, already feeling better. "Awkward sibling hug?," asked Dipper, opening his arms up. "Awkward sibling hug," said Mabel, doing the same thing. The two of them embraced each other, then gave each other pats on the back robotically while saying, "Pat, pat." It was honestly the most adorable thing Sammy had ever seen. But the good feelings went away when Dipper noticed the pile of shredded paper and leather nearby, which was all that remained of the journal after the gnomes ripped it up. He let go of Mabel and slowly walked towards the pile, staring down at it sadly. Mabel and Sammy walked up next to him. "You okay, bro-bro?," asked Mabel.
Dipper only shook his head and kept staring at the pile of shredded parchment. Sammy knelt down and wrapped his arm around Dipper's shoulder in a comforting manner. "I'm sorry about what happened to your journal, Dipper," he said softly. Dipper took a deep breath, then looked up at Sammy and Mabel with a sad smile on his face. "You know what, guys?," he said. "In the end… it was only a journal." The three of them embraced each other again, and a quiet, somber silence fell over them. "Come on, you two," said Sammy. "Let's go back inside."
After that touching moment, the three of them went back into the Mystery Shack, where Stan was counting his money at the front desk. When he saw them with sticks in their hair and scratches on their bodies, he couldn't help but crack a joke. "Yeesh. You three get hit by a bus or something? Ahah!" But none of them paid any attention to his joke. Instead, they walked right past him. As Stan watched them leave, he couldn't help but feel guilty and stopped them. "Uh, hey! W-wouldn't you know it? Um, I accidentally overstocked some inventory, so, uh… how's about each of you take one item from the gift shop? On the house, y'know?" "Really?," gasped Mabel. "But Mister Pines, you never give out anything for free," said Sammy. "Yeah, what's the catch?," asked Dipper, crossing his arms skeptically. "The catch is do it before I change my mind, now take something," Stan said impatiently, closing the register with a huff.
As Dipper looked around the gift shop, he noticed a blue and white cap on a shelf, with a picture of a pine tree on it. He put it on and looked at himself in the mirror. "Hmm. That oughta do the trick!" As Sammy looked around, he also spotted something. It was a bracelet made out of colorful yarn. There was nothing special about that bracelet, and yet, Sammy found himself being mesmerized by its colors. "You gonna take that, or are you just gonna keep looking at it?," asked Stan. Flushing with embarrassment, Sammy quickly took the bracelet and put it on his wrist. "And I will have a… GRAPPLING HOOK! Yes!," cheered Mabel, holding out her new prize. "Wouldn't she rather have, like, a doll, or something?," Stan asked Dipper and Sammy. Mabel pointed the grappling gun up at the ceiling and fired, then pulled herself up to the rafters with a crazed smile on her face. "GRAPPLING HOOK!" "Fair enough!," Stan said with a wide smile, obviously seeing no harm in letting a child keep a potentially dangerous weapon.
That night, the twins retired to the attic, though neither of them were ready to sleep yet. Mabel was jumping on her bed excitedly, too pumped up by today's events to fall asleep, while Dipper laid on his bed and stared out the window thoughtfully. "Hey, Mabel?," he asked. "Have you seen Sammy? I haven't seen him at all since we battled those gnomes." Mabel stopped jumping and thought for a moment. "Now that you mention it… I haven't seen him either," she said. "What do you think he's doing right now?" "Maybe Stan's having him stay up late to check the gift shop's inventory or something," said Dipper. Mabel noticed the melancholy tone in his voice and walked up to his bed. "C'mon, bro-bro," she said, rubbing his shoulder. "It's just a journal. Don't get too upset over it." "It's not the journal that I'm upset about," sighed Dipper, sitting up. "Well… okay, I'm still kind of upset about it. But it's also because… I said some things to Sammy earlier today that I wish I could take back… but I'm afraid that I might've pushed him away or something. Maybe that's why we haven't seen him all night. Maybe he's been avoiding me…" "Come on, Dipper, you know that's not true!," said Mabel. "If Sammy didn't like you, he wouldn't have tried to help us with beating the gnomes." Dipper definitely saw the reasoning in that, but he still felt guilty. "It's getting late. We should get some sleep. Could you get the light?," he asked. "I'm on it!," said Mabel, aiming her grappling hook at the lantern. She knocked the lantern through the window. "It works!" After that, Mabel got into her bed and fell asleep first. Dipper stayed awake for a little while longer, but eventually, he also started to feel his eyelids growing heavy. The last thing he saw before falling asleep was Sammy's empty bed.
"...psst! Dipper. Hey, Dipper. Wake up." Dipper's eyes slowly opened as he tried to hold back the yawn that threatened to escape his lips. The first thing he noticed was that it was still dark outside. The second thing he noticed was Sammy standing next to his bed, holding what appeared to be a rectangular box in his hands. Some loud snoring noises on the other side of the room indicated that Mabel was still asleep. "Sammy?," asked Dipper, slowly sitting up and rubbing his eyes. "Where were you last night? And what time is it right now?" "It's three in the morning," Sammy replied. "And… well, I was working on a special project last night."
After Dipper's eyes were finally acclimated to the darkness, he could see Sammy clearly now, and realized that there were dark rings under his eyes. It was clear that he had stayed up for a very long time. "Here," said Sammy, handing Dipper the box. It was covered in wrapping paper and had a small bow on top of it. "A present?," asked Dipper, raising an eyebrow. "But for what?" "Go ahead. Open it," said Sammy, smiling tiredly. Confused, Dipper slowly ripped open the wrapping paper so as to not wake up Mabel. Once he was finished, Dipper couldn't help but let out a sharp gasp. It was not a box at all. It was actually a book. And not just any book. It was a journal. The journal. The six fingered hand on the front cover gleamed in the moonlight, and the number three stared right back at him. "No way… Sammy, is that…?" Sammy nodded. "It's the journal," he said. "You can flip through it to see if it's the real deal." Dipper did exactly that and saw that it was indeed the real journal, with the same drawings, notes, and everything. "But-but… how?," he asked. "It was ripped up. I saw it happen right in front of me!"
"I went back and gathered up all the pieces that I could find," Sammy explained. "Then I spent all of last night putting them back together." Dipper looked closer and saw that the entire journal was being held together with glue and transparent tape. Somehow, Sammy was able to put all of the individual pieces, every single one of them, in the correct order and placement, and he did all of that in the span of eight whole hours without any breaks or rest. Forget gnomes and zombies. This was the most amazing thing that Dipper had ever seen in his entire life.
Dipper was so overwhelmed with joy from having his journal back that tears began to well up in his eyes. "Dipper?," Sammy asked worriedly. "What's wrong? Oh no, you don't like it, do you? Ugh, I knew I should've–" Dipper suddenly hugged Sammy tightly and began quietly crying into his shoulder. "I love it," he whispered. "Thank you." Sammy smiled and hugged him back. "You're welcome," he said. "And… I'm sorry for not believing you about Norman. Or the journal. I hope you can forgive me, but if you don't, I understand…" "W-what?," gasped Dipper, staring at Sammy in shock. "No! I'm the one who should be sorry! I was so caught up in proving that Norman was a zombie that I totally disregarded your feelings. I said mean things to you just because you didn't believe me about one thing, and even after all of that, you still put up with me and do something like this for me, and-and–" "Shhhh," whispered Sammy, putting his finger to Dipper's lips to silence him. "Listen, I'm super tired right now and I just want to go to sleep, so how about we admit that we both made mistakes and leave it at that?" Even though Dipper still wanted to argue, he could tell that Sammy was exhausted right now. "Okay, I'm fine with that," he said. "Good," said Sammy. Then, he stood up, stumbled over to his bed, and collapsed on the mattress with his clothes still on, falling asleep instantly. Dipper stared at him for a moment, then took out a pen and began writing in the journal. This journal told me there was no one in Gravity Falls I could trust. But when you battle a hundred gnomes side-by-side with someone, you realize that they've probably always got your back. Satisfied with what he wrote, he put the journal away and fell asleep, dreaming about what other mysteries would be unlocked.