Part three: Open Doors
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[Kurochi]
"I thought I turned off that alarm."
I rub my eyes with the palm of my hand and pick up my phone, which sits next to me on the nightstand and turn off the alarm.
I look at my lock screen closely, it's Friday, it's 8:30 in the morning and I have a bunch of missed call notifications and text messages, mostly from Natsuki.
Maybe I should answer, after all, I've been missing all week without a sign of life.
[Kurochi]
"..."
I'd better not, I want to be alone.
My stomach growls, I'd better get out of bed even if it's just to eat something.
I put my phone aside on the nightstand and get out of bed, heading for the bathroom.
I stand in front of the mirror and take a good look at myself.
[Kurochi]
"Ugh... I look terrible."
My hair is dirty and messy, plus the dark circles under my eyes have gotten darker.
I should take a bath, though I should see what to eat first.
I go down to the kitchen and check the cupboard, nothing, check the fridge, nothing... Shit, I haven't gone grocery shopping either.
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My search is interrupted by the sound of the door, who the fuck comes to disturb me at this hour?
I look through the peephole of the door, how strange, I don't see anyone.
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The door rings again.
I gently lean my head against the door and feign a deep voice.
[Kurochi]
"Who is it?"
[?]
"Is Kurochi there?"
[Kurochi]
"Who's looking for him?"
[?]
"A friend from school."
Wait, I know that voice.
[Natsuki]
"Is he home?"
I go back to my normal voice.
[Kurochi]
"It's me, what do you want."
[Natsuki]
"Kurochi, it's me, Natsuki..."
[Natsuki]
"Is everything okay? Can I come in?"
[Kurochi]
"Shouldn't you be at school?"
[Natsuki]
"That doesn't matter right now, Kurochi."
[Natsuki]
"Please answer me."
[Kurochi]
"..."
Shit.
I open the door, on the other side is Natsuki, dressed in a pink short-sleeved shirt, black jeans, and black sneakers and holding a large cloth bag.
She looks nice, unlike me who's wearing a black Radiohead t-shirt and pajama pants.
[Kurochi]
"Hello, Natsuki."
[Natsuki]
"FUCK KUROCHI!"
She enters the house while yelling at me.
[Natsuki]
"YOU HAD ME WORRIED SICK! YOU BIG IDIOT!"
She stares angrily into my eyes.
[Kurochi]
"I'm sorry."
[Natsuki]
"You disappear all week and that's all you have to say!?"
I don't know what to say to her.
[Kurochi]
"Do you want to sit down? I'll make you some tea."
[Natsuki]
"I don't want tea, I want you to explain to me why you haven't gone to the club and haven't answered my messages or calls."
[Kurochi]
"..."
I don't know if I should tell her.
[Natsuki]
"Kurochi, is everything okay?"
[Kurochi]
"..."
Shit, I feel like I'm going to cry.
[Natsuki]
"Kurochi?"
I feel my legs shaking.
[Kurochi]
"I-I..."
[Natsuki]
"Kurochi, please, what's wrong?"
I fall to my knees in front of Natsuki and burst into tears.
[Natsuki]
"K-Kurochi!"
Natsuki quickly approaches me and crouches down to stand face-to-face.
[Kurochi]
"!IT'S MY FAULT! IT'S ALL MY FAULT!"
[Natsuki]
"C-Calm down, can you tell me what happened?"
[Kurochi]
"I-I got to the festival and-and there was only Monika..."
I say between sobs and tears.
[Kurochi]
"She showed me everyone's poems and Sayori's... Sayori's was very strange."
My voice cracks the moment I mention her name.
[Natsuki]
"Calm down, breathe."
She says as she rubs my shoulder.
[Kurochi]
"So I went to look for her and she..."
[Kurochi]
"She..."
My whole body trembles, I don't want to say it.
[Natsuki]
"She...?"
I can't say it anymore.
[Kurochi]
"SHE HAD HUNG HERSELF!"
I see Natsuki's face turn white as she looks at me dumbfounded.
[Natsuki]
"S-Sayori...?"
[Kurochi]
"She had hung up, but right there was when I heard her say my name..."
[Kurochi]
"Then I did everything to get her down from there and try to perform CPR on her."
[Natsuki]
"..."
[Kurochi]
"She's in the hospital, the doctors said she was saved by a miracle."
[Natsuki]
"Oh... I'm so sorry Kurochi, I am."
Natsuki hugs me tightly and I feel her start to sob as she whispers to me.
[Natsuki]
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry."
[Natsuki]
"I shouldn't have gotten so mad at you without knowing what was going on."
[Natsuki]
"I'm here for you if you need it, but please don't disappear like that again."
[Kurochi]
"Sorry, Natsuki."
[Natsuki]
"Take it easy."
[Kurochi]
"This is my fault."
[Kurochi]
"I should have realized, I should have done something earlier."
[Natsuki]
"Calm down, Kurochi, you had no way of knowing."
[Kurochi]
"She told me what was wrong with her, but I still didn't go with her on the day of the festival."
[Kurochi]
"What would have happened if I was a few seconds late?"
[Kurochi]
"What if Monika hadn't shown me the poems?"
[Kurochi]
"It's my fault Sayori is now in the hospital."
My breathing quickens.
[Natsuki]
"Kurochi, breathe, please."
[Kurochi]
"Natsuki, this is my fault, this is all my fault."
[Natsuki]
"Stop saying it's your fault, please, you had no way of knowing I would do that."
[Natsuki]
"Take a deep breath."
[Natsuki]
"It'll be okay."
He lets go of me, and my arms fall.
[Kurochi]
"..."
I stare at the ground.
[Kurochi]
"Sorry, Natsuki, I didn't mean to worry you."
[Kurochi]
"I just wanted to be alone and I didn't know if I should tell you about Sayori."
I feel her hand on my face, it's cold, she lifts my head slightly and we are face to face.
[Natsuki]
"That doesn't matter now, now go and wash your face."
[Natsuki]
"I brought you some cupcakes since you didn't get to try them on the day of the festival."
Natsuki smiles at me, she's so cute when she smiles.
She caresses my cheek and stands up, immediately I stand up from the ground.
[Kurochi]
"You didn't have to-"
Natsuki shushes me by putting her hand on my face.
[Natsuki]
"Just go wash your face."
I go upstairs to the bathroom quietly and come face to face with the mirror once again.
[Kurochi]
"..."
I wet my face with cold water and look at myself in the mirror, droplets fall from my face slowly into the sink.
[Kurochi]
"I should go see Sayori."