Elijah/Kol, hand (playful)
Hey, when you look this good, you don't have to know anything.
Freya Kol, 2014
"Tell me how handsome I look," Kol said, standing in front of a full-size mirror.
Freya turned around on her desk chair. "You are very good looking."
He grinned at her through the mirror. "So, you can see why I figured swung for the other team when we first met."
"By context," Freya said, "I believe you're referring to which gender I'm attracted to, but I don't really understand what that has to do with sports."
Kol laughed. "Bex and I should write you some notes on current slang and important cultural references."
"That would actually be really helpful," Freya said with such earnestness that Kol felt his teeth rotting, "there are spells I can cast to learn any language, but grammar, syntax, are pronunciation just the basic components of any language. Over the past thousand years, I've never really been able to communicate with much of anyone. So much subtext and history were lost on me and I've never had enough time to integrate into any culture."
Kol turned around. His older sister was looking at the mirror instead of him. "It probably didn't help that you grew up so isolated." He tapped his temple with his index finger. "One of the few advantages of transitioning young is how quickly you can pick up on current trends. Bex and I have been daggered at least a dozen times each, but we've always learned how to fit in pretty quickly. I suppose that's what's normal for adolescents, even vampire ones."
"And Elijah?" Freya asked.
"Luckily for him," Kol said, "Nik could never stand to dagger him longer than a few months. Their codependency makes the rest of us look well-adjusted." There was something in Kol's eyes that kept Freya from replying. Kol was uncharacteristically silent for a very long time. She was looking at him now, instead of at the mirror. "Finn had trouble both times he came back," he said, finally. "While our mum was watching Nik and Elijah take down the wolf mobsters, she kept pushing me to take him out."
"What was that like?" Freya asked.
She looked so hungry that Kol forced found himself sharing, "Like pulling teeth with a marshmallow. But if the music was right and the drinks strong enough, he'd relax enough stop bitching about my posture or - "
Freya had been smiling gently as Kol spoke. But she couldn't help but interrupt with, "Your posture is fine."
"Exactly," Kol threw up his arms before strolling over to her and pulling her up, "c'mon, sister. We're both dressed up to the tens. I don't know about you, but I'm in the mood to dance."
Blackmail is such an ugly word. I prefer extortion. The 'x' makes it sound cool.
Klaus Elijah 2015
"Niklaus," Elijah took in the sight before him and frowned very deeply. "I just had the carpet cleaned."
"You have the carpet cleaned every bloody week," Klaus said, stabbing his victim in the shoulder with a rusty knife. He turned around. Elijah still didn't look impressed. "Brother, I'm sorry that our enemies don't keep in mind your cleaning schedule. But you can't expect me to ask a threat to come back next week just because you're so persnickety."
"As I have explained numerous times," Elijah took a few steps into the office, brushing his fingertips across the top of the desk, "that is why we have a dungeon in the basement. Not only are its surfaces specifically designed for the easy cleaning of blood, it's also where we keep most of instruments of torture."
Klaus was rolling his eyes and mocking Elijah by flapping his hand like it was a mouth. He leaned against his victim. "Look at this, mate." Said victim had no choice but to look at 'this'. He was tied up. Quite literally. "No matter what I do, he always finds something to criticize."
"It's almost as if everything I say goes in one ear and comes out the other," Elijah said. He gestured against the victim. "Why are we even hosting this poor creature?"
"He's an assassin," Klaus said, "hired by one of my enemies to kill my daughter."
"What sort of monster," the scent of piss filled the office as Elijah took one slow step after the other, "agrees to hit on a toddler?" He was in front of the assassin and kneeling down so they were eye-to-eye. "More importantly, why hasn't my brother sent you to hell yet?"
"You know how Hayley gets when don't let her get her licks in," Klaus said, resting his hand against the assassin's shoulder and leaning in to a nervous looking killer-for-hire. "And last time I woke her up from a nap, she made me regret it for weeks."
"I suppose," Elijah's smile made Klaus grin like a mad man, "I should be a more gracious host and help my brother entertain you while we wait."
It takes two to lie: one to lie and one to listen.
Elijah/Kol, 2015
"You had a part in this too," Kol pointed out as Elijah pulled him to stand between open legs.
Elijah's stilled his fingers, wrapped delicately around the fly of Kol's slacks. He glanced up at his little brother, who suspiciously calm, "Please, brother. Enlighten me on what part I played in your most recent misadventure?"
"I told you I was going to Rousseau's," Kol said, "and you believed me." He wiggled his eyebrows. "It takes two to tango, brother."
Elijah moved his hand in order to curl it around Kol's hipbone. "I can't decide if I should punish or encourage such hutzpah."
"If you ask me," Kol said and let it be known that Elijah did not ask, "you should encourage it."
"Don't," Elijah said, standing up and sliding his hand up Kol's back in order to cup the back of his neck and pull him into a hug, "expect that to work again."
"I take that to mean I should keep being creative with - " Kol jumped along with a loud crack and pressed his face into Elijah's chest, "that hurt!"
"I suggest you take the hint," Elijah said, "and start learning to quit while your head."
Kol reached back to rub out the mild sting. He was sulking, but made no move to get out of the circle of Elijah's embrace.