Trigger warning: mention of miscarriage

Prompt #97: Rollisi have a date at the pumpkin patch

Date Night To Forever

~oOo~

Sonny paced nervously outside of Amanda's apartment door, he shouldn't be nervous but he had planned to take her on this date prior to her getting injured, prior to her being shot and he just wasn't sure if she'd be up to it or even want to go as she hadn't wanted much from him since then.

He had sat by her bedside, willed and prayed for her recovery and now things were so vastly different. He couldn't bring himself to see her as she did now, questioning everything and everyone. No matter how hard she continually tried to push him away he was there to be with her forever.

He knocked lightly on the door knowing the sitter was already there as he had arranged it. He initially smiled hearing the sitter open the door and then sighed seeing the look on her face.

He made his way in, hearing Amanda's sobs from the bedroom and both girls so confused in the living room. He immediately went to them and gave them hugs and reassurance that their mama would be okay and asked the sitter to take them out to get dinner and dessert before handing her money and his keys.

He went to the bedroom door and carefully opened it and put his hands up immediately as a boot whizzed past him at the wall.

"Manda? Hey… hey it's okay."

Amanda's eyes filled more with anguish seeing him standing there and she slunk to the floor into a puddle of tears sobbing louder. Within a second Sonny went over and got on the floor with her pulling her into his arms as she tried to push him away.

"Hey… hey stop… come on Rollins. It's me… Breathe... Come here."

Amanda finally succumbed to his embrace and slowly calmed herself as the sobs stopped. She sat emotionless in his arms and finally untucked her chin enough to look at him and wiped her eyes vigorously. "I'm… I'm sorry… for all of it… I…" Her voice began to crack and Sonny shook his head.

"It wasn't your fault. Don't be sorry Manda... I love you and I'm sorry you're feeling like this—just let me try to help you."

Amanda's eyes went wide at his statement. "You can't help me… I lost OUR BABY. You CAN'T fix that… I won't ever feel better, I don't deserve to be here, I never deserved you."

She began to shake as she said the words out loud she had been thinking for weeks, the entire time she had been shutting him out since that day in the hospital and the days that came after as she slowly pushed him away. She couldn't understand why he just wouldn't leave and how he could even look at her after she allowed herself to lose their child.

Sonny pulled her fully into his embrace and kissed her hair, not allowing her to leave him. "You didn't do this…Amanda you couldn't help what happened, we didn't know it would happen or you'd never put yourself in that position. I don't and won't ever blame you for that or any of it. Just let me be with you—like we were, happy, together, a family." His voice faltered as he spoke trying to hold it together. "All I want is you and our girls… Jessie and Billie… You're my family." He kissed her hair again as she moved to look into his eyes seeing how sincere he was and that he wasn't lying.

She wrapped her arms around his neck and rested her head against his heart. She spoke barely above a whisper. "I love you, Sonny… I didn't think you'd want any of us any longer." She exhaled and relaxed against him, coming off the emotions and hormones that ran through her since she lost their baby.

Sonny stroked her back and hair and leaned down to kiss her cheek lightly and tilted her face up to him. "I will always want you, Amanda Rollins. No matter what. We can cancel tonight if you're not up to going, but I'd really like the opportunity to take you out on a date."

Amanda reluctantly nodded and allowed him the opportunity to help her up and kiss her before she walked to the closet and grabbed a pair of jeans and a yellow top. "I won't disappoint you by making you cancel. Give me 15 minutes and I'll be ready to go. I'm sorry if we're already running late." She wiped her eyes again and headed into the bathroom to quickly brush her hair out and get changed. She dabbed on a small amount of makeup and then came back out ready to go.

Sonny grinned. "You look so beautiful Amanda." She couldn't help but blush at the perceived compliment.

"You don't look bad at all yourself." Amanda followed him out to the street where he hailed a cab and gave the address, she looked at him confused as to where his car was, and then smiled realizing he gave it to the sitter for the girls. They rode fairly quietly to the destination, holding hands and her head leaned against his shoulder. Once the car stopped at the pumpkin patch Amanda looked at him inquisitively as he helped her out.

"We are here. Are you ready for a perfect fall date?"

Amanda nodded and smiled. "Any place with you is always perfect Dominick."

Sonny grinned and lead her around the pumpkin patch and then took her on the hayride with a cup of hot cider and wrapped his arm around her making sure to keep her warm.

"So… I know it's been a pretty good night, we can bring the girls back another day to get pumpkins."

Amanda nodded happily tucking her head under his chin and melting into his embrace. "I'm sure they would really like that. I know the last few months have been hard on them. They went from a happy family to me spinning out and you barely being there. I'm really sorry for how I've acted and I hope you can forgive me." She sniffed lightly.

Sonny rubbed her arm and shoulder and kissed her hair. "There's no reason to apologize. I understand it's been hard for everyone honestly. But I'm not going anywhere."

Once the ride stopped, Sonny climbed down and carefully lifted her down to ensure she didn't hurt her stomach. He kissed her forehead and guided her over toward the gift shop and photo area and grabbed her hand massaging her fingers gently and slipped a ring onto her ring finger and grinned as he turned to face her.

Amanda's eyes teared up feeling the ring slipped onto her finger and she bit her lip as it trembled thinking this was the moment she had waited for and longed for, for so long.

Sonny grinned and held her hand up for her to see the ring and smile. "Amanda Rollins….Will you do me the honor of taking my last name and being my wife? Completing our family once and for all."

Amanda nodded quickly as she wrapped her arms around his neck and buried her face as she cried the happiest of tears she ever could have had.

Sonny kissed her cheek and held her tightly and couldn't imagine their date ending any other way. He had been carrying the ring around for months just waiting for the right moment and this moment felt like it was perfect to him. They piled back into a cab and headed home holding each other the entire way back to Amanda's apartment and then exited the car. Sonny squeezed her hand as they walked up to the apartment door.

"Let's go in to our girls, to our home—I love you, Amanda."

Note: The author of this SVU: Fall in Love story will be revealed in November