As the days continued to pass, Tommy was becoming more and more irate with everyone, snapping at the slightest thing they said and losing his temper at anything and everything. The tension was getting to the entire family and Polly didn't know just how much longer they could go on. The only person Saoirse would see was John and Esme's baby and although it was a step in the right direction, it wasn't enough for Tommy. Polly tried exasperatedly to explain to him that tiny steps were better than no steps and that Rome wasn't built in a day, but Tommy would have none of it. He wanted to see Saoirse, to hold her and it was eating him up alive that he couldn't.

That morning he had left at the crack of dawn after somebody claimed to have seen a man fitting Joe's description in Stoke, and Tommy apparently didn't trust anyone else to check it out so he had gone himself. John was off collecting money from some people who had been using Tommy's distracted mood to get away with not paying what they owed. Ada wasn't, well, who fucking knew where Ada was. She had claimed to be going out with a friend but knowing her she could have gone to Timbuktu and still be back in time for dinner.

"I really need to get out to the shops," Polly muttered, more to herself than to Arthur who was spooning sugar cube after sugar cube into his tea. It was a rather unknown fact that Arthur Shelby had a very sweet tooth, and always had since childhood.

"What's stopping you?" Arthur asked, stirring the tea, the metal of the spoon clanking against Polly's fine china; the one luxury she loved to indulge in.

"I don't want to leave Saoirse," Polly sighed.

"Well, it's not like she's gonna come out of the bedroom anyway," Arthur commented, slurping his tea loudly.

"She might."

"And I might wake up tomorrow and be the King of England," Arthur answered smartly. " If it makes you feel better, I ' ll sit right here until you get back. "

"Haven't you got things to be doing?" Polly narrowed her eyes at him.

"Not really," Arthur shrugged. " They can wait."

Indecision played in Polly's eyes but eventually she stood up, retrieving her coat and bag. "I'll be as quick as I can," she promised.

"Pol," Arthur called out to her before she could leave. " Sometimes I think I don ' t tell you enough how much you mean to us all, and how much we appreciate everything you do for this family. "

"Are you getting soppy in your old age, Arthur Shelby?" Polly teased.

"Fuck off," he scowled, bringing a chuckle from Polly who reached across the table and squeezed his hand briefly before leaving.

Polly had been gone for perhaps ten minutes when Arthur heard a bang from Saoirse's bedroom and he looked up with a frown. Setting down the newspaper he was reading, hesitantly he climbed up the stairs wondering if there was even any point in going up there. He had long past given up trying to see her, just like everyone else, but he couldn't very well leave her alone now without checking she wasn't hurt.

"Saoirse," he stopped outside the door. " I know you don't wanna talk and I understand, but I heard a bang. Sounded a little bit like a herd of elephants, and I wanted to check you were alright? I'm guessing the bloody noise was you because if not, it must have been a fucking ghost."

He heard shuffling footsteps that stopped on the other side of the door.

"Just let me know you're alright so I don't have to go and call for the priest to come and exorcise the house, eh?"

"I'm ok," her quiet voice sounded through the wood.

"Well, that's good," Arthur smiled even though she couldn't see him. "I, uh, I know you told Polly you don't wanna see anyone, and I'm not gonna force you, but if you'll let me, can I sit here and talk to you for a bit? You don't have to say anything back. In fact, maybe I could tell you a story?"

She didn't say anything, so he decided to go ahead and do it anyway. Sitting down, he leaned his back against the door and stretched out his long legs.

"Right," he cleared his throat. " I'm going to tell you a story about a girl I know. She's the sweetest thing you've ever seen in your life. She's got hair the colour of fire and a temper to match. She's funny, too; always got a witty remark or a funny joke for any occasion. She's got the biggest heart of anyone I've ever known. Never looks down on anyone or thinks badly of them, even when they deserve it. She's got this way about her that it's like she just knows how to make you feel better. It's not even the fact that she knows all the right words to say; it's just her. She's warm and safe. But the sad thing is that this girl I know, and who I happen to love like she was a sister, has been through something so awful that I can't even begin to imagine it. And as cowardly as that might make me, I don't want to. She's hurting, this girl, and quite fucking rightly too. But in her pain she's cutting off the people that love her, because it's not just me that loves her; there's a whole fucking lot of us. And there's one person more than all of us put together, even more than me if you can believe that, who would give his last breath for her. That man's as fucking broken as she is, you see. And you know what's so terrible about it? The two of them need each other. She needs him and he needs her; it's that fucking simple."

"He doesn't need her," he heard her murmur softly. " He probably doesn't even want her. Why would he? "

"Of course he wants her," Arthur let out a breath. She was actually talking to him and he wanted to fucking cry. " Saoirse, he fucking loves you."

"No, Arthur," she sniffed. " How can he love me now? "

"What do you mean?" Arthur turned to face the door.

"How can he love me after what Joe did to me?"

"That wasn't your fault, sweetheart," Arthur ' s voice implored her to understand. "None of that was your fault. You don't honestly believe Tommy would think differently about you because of that?"

"I feel differently about me now," she admitted with a sob. " I feel dirty all the time. Doesn't matter how many times I wash myself, I can't wash it all away. I can feel him on me when I'm awake and when I'm asleep. And my face, he's ruined me, Arthur. He's ruined me from the inside out and I don't think anyone can fix me. And I don't know if I want them to."

"What do you mean?" Arthur asked even though he had a feeling he already knew.

"I want it to go away, Arthur," she sobbed. " I keep thinking about how easy it would be to just end it all. Then I wouldn't have to hurt anymore, would I? And soon enough Tommy would forget about me and meet someone who isn't tainted and disfigured."

"You stop that right now," Arthur's voice cracked. " You fucking stop that, do you hear me? Tommy needs you. He fucking needs you, Saoirse. I need you, too. You think if you kill yourself it's going to make it all better, but it isn't. Because what if wherever you end up, you still feel the fucking same and only then you won't have people to help you?"

"What about my mum and dad?" she whispered. " Wherever I go, they'll be waiting for me, won't they? At least that's what everyone told me when they died. "

"That's true enough," Arthur's voice was thick with emotion. " But they wouldn't want that for you, would they? They want to see you grow old and have kids and grandkids. If you can't do it for yourself or me or even fucking Tommy, then do it for them, eh?"

Silence.

Arthur swallowed and held his face in his hands. Silence unnerved him; it was oftentimes a dangerous thing. There was a noise of something being dragged away from the door and then the click of the lock turning. Arthur held his breath as the door handle turned slowly. When the door creaked open, Arthur kept as still as a statue so that he wouldn't startle her into retreating back.

Saoirse stood in the doorway, hesitant and wary. She played with her fingers nervously and chewed her lip. Arthur stepped closer with a warm smile upon his face and held out his arms, silently beckoning her. Bursting into tears, Saoirse threw herself at Arthur, clutching at his shirt as his arm wrapped themselves around her.

"I've got you, love," he kissed the top of her head. " It's alright."

The raw and gut-wrenching wails coming from Saoirse pierced Arthur's soul, and he blinked back tears. It physically hurt him to feel her shaking with the force of her emotions. Closing his eyes and resting his chin upon her head, Arthur tried to block out the sight of the cut that ran down the entire length of her cheek. Arthur himself was a fucking animal, but even he found it incomprehensible that a man could do something like that to a woman. His hands clenched subconsciously around her as he imagined inflicting the same amount of damage on the fucker that had done this. He hoped Tommy found him soon because the longer they had to stew on this, the worse it was going to be for Joe. Then again, perhaps that wasn't a bad thing.

Saoirse buried her head against Arthur's chest, relishing in the safety of him. She had not realised just how much she needed to feel another human until now. She had not realised just how much she needed to feel Tommy until now. She was desperate for him, but at the same time she was terrified.

"When's Tommy home?" she lifted her tear-stained face to Arthur.

"Later tonight," Arthur murmured, trying his hardest not to let his eyes fall upon her scar. " He's got business. "

Saoirse nodded, letting out a sigh. "Does he hate me?" she asked.

"Of course not," Arthur wiped her face, mindful of her cheek. She flinched nonetheless and he quickly dropped his hand.

"Sorry," she apologised.

"Don't be. You've got nothing to be sorry for."

"I've been awful, haven't I?"

"Sweetheart, you could have been ten times worse and none of us would care. You're one of us and we would do anything for you."

Saoirse nodded, wiping the rest of her tears away. She sniffed and took a deep breath, tucking her hair behind her ear.

"Arthur?"

"Yes, love?"

"I'm tired," she said.

"Alright," Arthur answered. " Get yourself back into bed then, eh? "

"Will you stay?" she asked. " Will you stay with me until Tommy gets back? "

Smiling, Arthur followed her into the bedroom, flinging his suit jacket over the back of the armchair as Saoirse climbed back into bed.

"You sleep and I'll be right here, ok?"

"Arthur?" Saoirse whispered, pulling the covers up to her neck. " Will you hold my hand? Just until I'm asleep? "

When Polly returned half an hour later, and found Arthur missing, she followed the sounds of thunderous snoring up the stairs and into Saoirse's bedroom. Pausing at the door, a smile played at her lips at the sight of Arthur fast asleep in the armchair and Saoirse fast asleep in the bed. Her gaze fell to the sight of their arms both slightly outstretched and their hands holding onto one another in slumber.

Who knew what sort of fucking miracle had taken place in the short time she had been gone, but Polly thanked God there and then that things might finally be improving.