Tommy returned from Stoke in a foul mood from yet another dud lead. He slammed the front door shut behind him and flung his coat angrily on the hook. He could hear the family in the front room, eating dinner. Ada was giggling at something Arthur was telling her, and then he heard her . He burst through the living room door, certain he had imagined hearing her voice and his knees almost buckled when he saw her sat at the table in between Ada and Finn, a hint of a smile upon her face. She looked up and he saw a flash of unease behind her eyes, but she quickly recovered herself.

"Tommy," Polly stood and smiled. " You hungry? "

Tommy was speechless. He thought about pinching himself just to make sure that this was real, that she was real. Saoirse had not yet moved, she was just watching him and he her.

"I don't know about you lot, but I reckon I could use a drink," Arthur cleared his throat.

"Oh, not tonight," Ada complained. " I'm knackered. Ow, what was that for? "

"I didn't do anything," Arthur said innocently, his eyes widening slightly until Ada finally got the hint.

"Actually, I really fancy a drink," she stood suddenly. " Come on Polly. And you Finn; you can have a shandy. "

The Shelbys cleared out quickly, leaving Saoirse and Tommy alone. Neither moved and neither spoke. They just continued to stare as though they were seeing the other person for the first time in their lives. It was Tommy who opened his mouth to speak first, but Saoirse quickly held up a hand to silence him. She pulled out the chair beside hers and patted it. Hesitantly, Tommy walked over, sitting down only once she had given him an assuring nod. His hands were clenched in his lap and Saoirse reached over gently to take hold of one. Tommy's eyes flickered to hers and she tried to smile.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, a pitiful tear rolling down her cheek.

"What the fuck have you got to be sorry for?" Tommy's voice was thick with pent up emotion.

"I'm sorry for the way I've treated you," she answered. " I just , I know I haven ' t been fair, but the truth is Tommy I haven't cared about anything other than the way I feel."

Tommy didn't say anything. It was obvious she had more to say and he didn't want to interrupt her. He was frightened that if he did, she would seize up again. He didn't realise it, but he was shaking, trembling with trepidation and delight all at once.

"And I was scared that you wouldn't want me anymore," she whispered sadly. " I still am. "

"You know that's not true though, don't you?" Tommy ' s thumb rubbed against the back of her hand. " Nothing will ever change how I feel about you, Saoirse."

"I know," she nodded and took a shaky breath. " But surely you can understand why I would have thought that. I mean, you know what he did to me, Tommy. You know that he rap- "

She stopped and swallowed the bile in her mouth, unable to finish the sentence. She just couldn't do it. It was only a word, just a word but it came with so many memories that she wished she could tear out of her head.

"Saoirse, I know," Tommy squeezed her hand reassuringly. " I know what he did to you, you don't need to say it. But that wasn't your fault. None of this was your fault."

"And what about this?" she pointed to her face. " You can't tell me that this doesn't bother you? Because it sure as hell bothers me. It makes me feel sick. I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror before and wanted to smash it to pieces."

Tommy leaned forwards and gently ran his fingers along the length of the scar on her face, before pressing his lips against it in a butterfly of a kiss. He pulled back and rubbed his nose against hers.

"You are beautiful," he murmured. " You're beautiful when you're soaking wet from walking to work in the rain; you're beautiful when you're shouting at John for knocking the ink pot all over the ledgers and you're beautiful right now. This," he kissed her scar again. " This doesn't define you, at least not in a bad way. This is an outward representation of just how fucking strong and brave you are. That fucking bastard is going to regret the day he did that to you, because when I find him, and I will fucking find him, I will make him wish he'd never been born. But I don't want you to spend your whole life hating yourself for what he's done to you; I don't want you to be ashamed of looking at yourself. In fact, stand up right now."

Taking her by the hand, Tommy tugged her up and she allowed him to drag her towards the mirror that hung over the fireplace.

"You look in that mirror now and I want you to really look at yourself."

"Tommy," she begged him not to make her.

"Look in the mirror, Saoirse," he was firm yet not unkind.

She looked up and her eyes immediately fell upon the hideous line that marred her face. Tears began to spill before she could stop them and she wanted to cry and scream and ask Tommy what he thought to prove in being so cruel. Tommy appeared in the reflection behind her and wound his arms around her to rest his chin on her shoulder. His eyes were full of adoration for. Adoration that she knew she didn't deserve but she wanted it nonetheless.

"You're looking at yourself and loathing what's staring back at you," he murmured. " I can see it in your eyes. But I want you to look in that mirror every morning and remind yourself that you're alive and you're free of that fucking monster forever. You don't need to tell yourself that you're beautiful because I'll do it for you. I'll do it every day with God as my fucking witness."

Suddenly Tommy dropped to one knee and Saoirse felt as though the room was spinning. Everything was muffled as her mind tried to comprehend what was happening before her.

"Saoirse O'Reilly, I want to spend every day for the rest of our lives reminding you how perfect you are to me and how much I love you," Tommy spoke vehemently. "I know I'm not doing this right. I don't even have a ring, but I'll get you one; any one you want, just tell me and it's yours."

"Tommy," Saoirse knelt down in front of him and took his face in her hands. " Don't do this. Please don ' t do this. I don't want you to ask me this out of pity or whatever else this is. "

"It's not pity," Tommy shook his head. " When have you ever known me do anything out of pity, eh? If anyone should be taking pity, it's you. Take pity on me because without you, I'm nothing and I need you."

Saoirse was scared. That was an understatement; she was terrified. The last time she had trusted and believed a man who promised to spend eternity loving her, he had ruined her in every way possible. She didn't know how she was supposed to now place her trust in another man who swore to do the same. But this was Tommy. Her Tommy. This was the man who had seen right through Joe from day one and had tried to sway her away from him. This was the man who had waited patiently for the past few weeks while she shut him out and ignored him. Never once had he raised his voice and demanded to see her. Never once had he made her feel anything less than safe and loved, even if she didn't feel that way about herself. If she turned him down now, there was a chance she was giving up the most precious opportunity she would ever have all because of the damage another had done to her. If she turned Tommy down, there would be no going back and Joe would have won, wouldn't he? Hadn't he already taken enough from her?

"Saoirse, I'm not trying to force you into anything you're not ready for," Tommy could sense her inner turmoil. " I just want you to know that everything I say to you is the truth. If you don't want it then I'll accept it and I'll always be here for you regardless, but you have my heart and I don't think anyone else could ever come close to you."

Saoirse thought her heart was going to burst hearing such words coming from Tommy's mouth and she knew there and then she couldn't let him go. She wouldn't let him go.

"I love you," she smiled through her tears, pressing her forehead to his and squeezing her eyes shut. "Yes, I'll marry you."

Tommy smiled against her mouth and kissed her gently, brushing her hair back from her face. He pulled her into his arms and deepened the kiss, but as his knee brushed against her core she stiffened.

"Saoirse?" he questioned, concerned about the paled complexion she had suddenly taken on.

"Sorry," she stood up and he saw her body was trembling. " I just -"

His arms were around her the second she burst into tears and he kissed her head, murmuring softly against her ear. She was shaking and Tommy felt helpless.

"It's alright," he whispered. " It's alright. "

"I'm sorry," she sobbed. " I just can't , the thought of -"

"Hey, hey," he cupped her face. " I won't have any more apologies, do you hear me? "

"Yeah, but what if I never want-, what if I can't-?"

"Saoirse, love," Tommy smiled, his eyes intense as they sought out her own. " This, us, what we have is more than just being together physically. I don't love you for that; sex and intimacy is just an expression of that but there are other ways to do that."

"Tommy," Saoirse sighed. " You can't go your whole life telling yourself you don't mind not being with me in that way. "

"I can and I fucking will," Tommy was adamant. " Because I want you in my life for the rest of my life and nothing will change that."

"I don't know what I've ever done in my life to deserve you, but I don't think you'll ever understand just how much you mean to me."

"Trust me, if it's even an ounce of what you mean to me then I understand completely."

The entire family was overjoyed when they heard of Tommy and Saoirse's engagement, but none as happy as Arthur who had tears in his eyes upon hearing the news.

"Now you really are gonna be my sister," he smiled, kissing her head and pulling her into a bear hug. "But you were like a sister in my heart anyway."

"Arthur, will you stop saying such sweet things to my wife to be?" Tommy pretended to scowl, slapping Arthur playfully on the back. " You're putting me to shame. "

"Well, I can't help it if I'm better at it than you," Arthur grinned, winking at Saoirse. "But I wouldn't worry because I don't think any amount of sweet words will make her look at me like she looks at you, brother."

"Then I feel sorry for you," Tommy pushed himself in between Arthur and Saoirse, stroking her face as his eyes glowed with devotion.

For once he didn't care that there were people around, and besides these people were his family; the people he was closest to in the world. He kissed Saoirse soundly, grinning against her mouth when Arthur whooped and clapped.

"As sickeningly sweet as you two are," Ada pulled a face as she wedged her way in between them. " I have a wedding to plan with my new sister-in-law. "

"Ada," Tommy scoffed. " We've been engaged less than a few hours; I've not even got her a ring yet and already you're desperate to spend my hard-earned money on a wedding. "

"Is she not worth it?" Ada raised an eyebrow.

"Of course she is," Tommy smirked.

"Well then," Ada grinned. " You just give us the cheque book and we'll do everything else. What do you say, Saoirse? "

"I don't really want a big wedding," Saoirse shrugged, leaving Ada appalled. " I just would prefer something quiet."

"What a disgusting idea," Ada was aghast. " A small wedding? That's a horrific idea. "

"I just don't like a big fuss," Saoirse answered honestly.

"But it's your wedding," Ada exclaimed, wide eyed. " It's the one day of your life where you can bask in the attention from everyone. You can dress like a princess and everyone gets to tell you how beautiful you are."

For some reason, those words struck a nerve with Saoirse and she suddenly didn't feel like celebrating anymore. How was anyone going to tell her she was beautiful without it being a barefaced lie?

"Saoirse, are you alright?" Tommy frowned, touching her elbow.

"Yeah," she nodded hurriedly. Too hurriedly, biting on her lip. " I'm just tired. I think I'm going to go up to bed."

She turned and left before anyone could even try and stop her.

"What the fuck is wrong with you?" Tommy hissed at Ada, his eyes cold.

"What have I done?" Ada frowned, completely ignorant as to why Tommy was so angry.

"What have you done?" Tommy shook his head incredulously. " You just couldn't keep your fucking trap shut, could you? "

"Who the fuck do you think are talking to like that?" Ada snapped.

"I'll talk to you how I fucking want," Tommy saw red and couldn't hold his temper in check any longer.

"Break it up you two," Polly demanded, looking from one of them to the other.

"He started it," Ada said indignantly.

"I don't fucking care who started it, I'm ending it," Polly was firm, talking to them as though they were children again. " It's taken a lot of work to get Saoirse down here and talking to everyone again. You need to be careful how you speak to her, she's sensitive at the moment."

"Wouldn't you be fucking sensitive in her shoes?" Tommy spat. " That bastard raped her and cut her and broke her. She's got every fucking right to be sensitive. "

"No one's saying she hasn't!" Polly raised her voice to match her obstinate nephew's as she pushed her face into his. "But you know as well as I do that Ada didn't mean to upset her, just like I'm not trying to imply that what she's been through isn't an acceptable reason to be emotional. So jump down off your high fucking horse before you give yourself a bloody nosebleed."

Tommy clenched his jaw in annoyance but refrained from saying anything else despite how difficult it was for him. Polly pursed her lips and eyed him warily, waiting for the smart arsed remark to escape him but when one wasn't forthcoming, she nodded in approval.

"Where are you going?" she asked, as Tommy headed towards the door.

"To see my fucking fiancée."

As his heavy footsteps stomped angrily up the staircase, Polly couldn't help but smile at the little twinkle in his eye when he had called Saoirse his fiancée. She just hoped that this was enough to bring the pair of them both some happiness, because God knew they deserved it.

Only time would tell.