"Spencer…" Riley mumbled in her sleep. Her leg twitched to push him awake. "Spencer, I'm freezing… go fix the thermostat."
There was no response, but that wasn't uncommon. He was a heavy sleeper. "Spencer…" she moaned louder. "Wake up, I'm cold."
Her hand reached beside her, feeling the fabric of the sofa. Confused, Riley woke up instantly, looking around. It was close to dawn. Riley woke up in the semi-darkness of the room. This was the moment she hated the most. In the vague world between asleep and awake, Riley could forget everything. She was at peace and had the wonderful life she never knew she'd wanted.
Wrapping herself in her blanket, she got up and headed through the darkness to the thermostat, attempting to adjust it herself. That thing never worked right, for as long as she lived here, anyway. Spencer had been the only one able to get it to work. He really was a magician. Riley decided to spend another minute on it, attempting to get a little heat into this place.
So many things about this building were falling apart. Perhaps in another month, when she was feeling a little better, she'd look for a new place. One that didn't have memories of Spencer on every inch of it.
As she worked at the thermostat, the sound of the front door opened. A moment later, Emily stepped in switching on the light, looking startled and pleased to see Riley up from the couch.
"Hey, look who's up," She said with a smile. "How are you doing?"
She was so tired of that question. "Well, let's see Emily. My apartment's freezing and I can't get the temperature up. I have a weird pain in my left side I'm convinced is an ulcer. Oh, and my boyfriend's dead, and has been for almost three weeks." She gave a patronizing smile. "How was your night?"
Emily felt like a rat. She was with her almost every night, holding her hand when she broke down in tears and knew full well Reid was alive and getting better. She began to debate; maybe she should go against her boss's wishes and just tell her. Riley hadn't left the house since the funeral, she could just stay here until Reid came home and, were Nathan Harris watching her, would be none the wiser. But this was a delicate situation, and things like that had a tendency to backfire. Hopefully, Riley would understand why she had to go through this and would just be happy to have Reid back.
Giving up the fight with the ratty thermostat, Riley heaved a sigh. "I'm going to put on something warm." She said, heading to the bedroom. "So where were you last night?"
Following her into the bedroom. "Sorry… I was unavoidably detained."
"Really?" Riley replied, sounding curious. "With whom?"
She in no way regretted last night, but Emily and Morgan had made the deal. It was over; it was like it never happened. "Morgan… he and I discussed the case. We have a new lead." It was not a lie. They did talk about the case for over an hour in the wee hours of the morning.
"Oh," She hated the mention of the case and showed no interest in it whenever Emily brought it up. "Well, that's good. I'm glad the investigation's going well."
"You know," She said as Riley chose one of the few remaining clean pairs of pajama pants from her drawer. Emily would have to do her laundry if Riley didn't get back on her feet soon. As Riley started to get dressed, she had an idea. "It's not good to be alone in this apartment so much. Maybe tonight, you and I should go out to dinner or something."
"No," Riley didn't even give it a thought. "Emily, I appreciate everything you're doing, but… I can't."
Emily wouldn't push her. "Okay, you're not ready. That's okay."
Her fingers lingered on the drawstring of her pants. Riley knew that Emily had a point. She had to start moving forward; as destroyed as she was, life hadn't actually stopped. Her job wouldn't wait forever for one thing. But the thought of going over the threshold into the real world made her want to collapse. It was hard to believe three weeks had passed her. Every day felt the same, like she were reliving it over and over.
"Is this what he went through?" Riley mumbled.
"Who? Went through what?" Emily was confused.
"Spencer… when I was in Seattle… is this what he went through?" Her sad brown eyes looked up to meet Emily's. "Did I put him through this?"
She looked away from Riley, not wanting to upset her with the truth. It had been a year ago, but Emily remembered vividly, as did the rest of the team, how miserable Reid had been when he lost Riley. "Riley… Reid knows you love him. It's going to be okay."
"Knew." Riley corrected. Emily mentally kicked herself for the slip up, but Riley didn't pick up on it. "And sometimes… I'm not so sure he knew. He treated me like an angel… you never realize the things unsaid until it's too late."
Riley went over to dig through the hamper again. As she searched, Emily's eyes landed on a small red jewelry box under the bed. It seemed an odd place for jewelry and went to fetch it. Opening it slowly, she let out a gasp.
"Wow," she uttered. "This is beautiful. Did he pick it out himself?"
"I don't know," Riley grumbled, pulling one of Reid's dress shirts around her, breathing in the scent once again. "Do you want it?"
Looking up in shock. "I'm sorry?"
"Take it, it's yours." She explained. "I don't want it."
"Riley… you don't mean that." Emily said, closing the box.
"Oh, yes I do." She explained. "Take it, sell it, throw it into the Potomac – I don't care. Just please, get it out of my house."
Even if Reid were dead, she was not about to let her friend dispose of this ring. "Riley, Spencer bought this for you. He bought it because he wants – wanted to spend the rest of his life with you. What would it mean to him if he knew you just… gave it away? Or threw it away? That would break his heart."
"Well, that's just it, isn't it, Emily? It can't break his heart because Spencer isn't here anymore. He's gone and he's never coming back and I can't stand to look at that thing without feeling like I want to be sick!" She snatched it back from Emily and walked to the waste basket in the bathroom. "It's a constant reminder of the life we were supposed to have!"
She chucked it among the tissues and empty toiletry items in the basket. "It's in there if you change your mind." She explained, heading back into the living room.
Emily removed the box. She fit it into the pocket of her coat and returned to the front room. Riley was just pulling the covers over her head as she collapsed onto the couch. "I'll be back tonight, and I'll bring some food."
"Whatever," Riley mumbled, wishing she would just leave.
Silence wasn't good for her. Emily turned on the television, at least something to keep her company. Leaving Riley to her misery, Emily headed to work.
…
"That's good thinking, guys," Hotch said that morning as they discussed their findings in the conference room. "It fits Reid's theory."
"When did you two come to the conclusion?" Gideon asked much too inquisitively. Legs crossed and hands folded over his lap, he looked at Morgan and Emily curiously. It was almost like he could see through them and sense what had happened.
"Emily and I talked for awhile last night. We had pizza." Morgan said casually. Both he and Emily hid their indiscretion well. It seemed Gideon was the only one who cast them with a presuming stare. But, since he had no authority over them, his suspicion did not worry either of them.
"Alright," Hotch thought carefully, "Garcia, you said you have some information for us, correct?"
"Yes, sir," she said, brightly. "Six weeks before Ethan Williams was killed is the last reported murder with a similar MO in Elle's case. I decided to follow on that lead and I discovered the victim of identity theft and it is – drum roll please – Shakira Fallon."
"Why does that name sound familiar?" Elle asked.
Both Morgan and Emily recognized it immediately. Emily dug through the folders piled on the table as she replied, "She was working with Larissa the night she was killed." She removed Larissa's folder and flipped through quickly to find her name. "She claimed she was listening to her iPod when Nathan killed her… but maybe she was lying."
"She did say she knew Nathan. She could have been covering for him." Morgan added.
Hotch nodded. "JJ, call the coroner who performed Sandy Lowell's autopsy and confirm she was pregnant. Garcia, I want a detailed list of everything bought in Shakira's name in the last year, maybe we can track Nathan down with that. Morgan, Emily, you follow up on your lead to talk with Allan Payne. The rest of us need to go over Elle's notes from the crime scene so I can give them to Reid tonight."
Dismissed, the team headed out on their daily assignments.
…
Emily felt a slight chill as they drove closer and closer to the college. Even though Reid was healing, it still haunted her that she stood still and watched her friend while he bled in pain. She reached into her pocket and pulled out the box, fingering it in her hands, not sure if rescuing the ring from being thrown into the trash constituted as repayment for almost letting her friend die.
Morgan hung up his cell phone. "That was JJ. Coroner confirms; Sandy was twelve weeks pregnant." He took a glance at her, noticing what was captivating her attention. "Prentiss, how did you get that?"
Unaware that he knew, "You've seen this?"
"Yeah, it's Reid's engagement ring for Riley. He showed it to Garcia and me before they went to Vegas. He was asking about it yesterday, wondering what happened to it when he got hurt." Morgan smiled. "He was practically panicked."
"Well, he can relax," She said with a smile. "I'll keep it safe until he comes back."
"Great," Morgan said, his smile turned wicked. "Plus, it gives me a chance to mess with him a little."
"Morgan," She moaned, "Don't you think the poor boy's been through enough?"
"He needs to get back to his normal routine," He replied, as if he were doing Reid a favor. "And that includes me screwing with him."
"You really do think of him as your little brother, don't you?" She said with a smile.
Morgan returned her grin, flipping on his signal in order to change lanes. He noticed how Emily rested back on the headrest and closed her eyes. He admired her as long as he could without looking back to the road.
"You seem tired." He mentioned.
"Yeah, I am." Emily said, eyes still closed.
"Really… Something keep you up last night, Princess?" His mouth spread into a satisfied smirk.
She opened her eyes in surprise. "Excuse me, is that never mentioning it again?"
"There's no reason we can talk about it among ourselves." Was his reasoning.
Emily gave a soft chortle. "You know what's weird, though… I don't feel weird. Not about last night… not around you… I feel completely normal."
"I know, I do, too. I've never felt like that the morning after." He said, taking another glance at her. "Normally after sex, I want to avoid the girl as long as possible. But this morning… I couldn't wait to see you, just like every day before."
"I'm so relieved this didn't ruin anything." Emily said. "We got it out of our system and now things can go back to normal."
Morgan agreed, trying to make himself believe that was what he wanted, too.
…
Allan Payne was just about to leave for a class that morning when they arrived. He recognized Emily immediately, looking frightened once again.
"Agent Preston?" He asked.
"Prentiss," she corrected, "And this is SSA Derek Morgan. We have a few more questions for you."
"I told you everything I know." He looked around, nervous. "I don't know how else I can help you."
"We're more interested in speaking to the father of Sandy Lowell's baby." Morgan said, standing tall and intimidating, sun glasses and all.
"Well, sorry, I don't know who he is." Allan went to push past them in order to get to his car.
"You don't sound too surprise about that." Emily noticed. Allan wouldn't look at them. His back hunched as he tried to find the correct key to unlock his car. It further confirmed Emily's thought from last night. "It was you, wasn't it?"
"Shut up!" Allan hissed, whipping around. "We all know what happened the last time you were here. Nathan's probably still watching you, and if he finds out I had sex with his girlfriend… I mean, it was only one time."
"Were you planning on the keeping the baby?" Emily asked.
"I don't know what we were going to do. We didn't even discuss it. All she said was she had to tell Nathan first. That was the last time I saw her. When she disappeared, it was a Friday. I just assumed she went home to her family for the weekend before she told him. He never brought it up and it wasn't my place to tell him."
"Thank you for telling us that," Morgan said, "If we have any other questions, we'll contact you. And you have our unit's number, correct?"
"Yeah," Allan muttered. He thought for a moment. "I'm sorry you're partner got shot… is he okay?"
"He's getting better. He should be back to work soon." Emily replied. "We'll be in touch."
They left Morgan to his car. A short conversation, he wouldn't even be late for his class. Getting in their car, they made their way back to Quantico.
"There's no way Nathan knew he was the father." Morgan said as they merged with the traffic on the interstate. "Allan would be dead by now."
"I was thinking the same thing." Emily concurred just as her phone rang. The number was unfamiliar. She answered it with concern, "Prentiss."
Morgan watched her as she smiled, lighting up as if he'd given her a bar of her favorite Swiss chocolate. "Oh, hi! No, I just didn't recognize the number. I really didn't expect you to call… no, it's just been a really tough couple of weeks, we're in the middle of a hard case… Tonight?... Well, I have plans to meet a friend tonight, but I can be a little late if you wanted to get an early dinner… Yes, I love that place, I'll meet you there at six?... Great, see you then." She hung up the phone, practically giggling.
"Who was that?" Morgan asked, his eyes focused on the car in front of him.
"Malcolm, remember, from the bar?" She said with a smile. "We're going out to dinner tonight."
"Oh, that's nice. So his Mom is extending his curfew then?" He scowled.
Her joy dissipated away. "Do you have a problem with me going on a date, Morgan?"
"No…" He said, still refusing to look at her. "Why, would you care if I did?"
"It wouldn't stop me from going." She stated. "It's none your concern who I date."
"I know it's not." He said. "Have fun with your frat boy."
She fixed him with a curious, indignant stare. "Is this about last night?"
"No!" He cried immediately, "This has nothing to do with that. You do whatever you want, Princess. I really don't care."
The rest of the ride was silent. Morgan felt sick with jealousy thinking of her with another man while Emily was heart broken she couldn't have him. Both fixed their stares on the road, refusing to acknowledge the other presence in the car.
…
Riley was lying on the couch staring at the television, waiting to see if Emily would show up tonight. She and Spencer had never watched much television, even though they had a set in both the living room and bedroom. But they liked to watch movies together at night. And when he was out of town, she sometimes left it on when she fell asleep, just so the apartment wouldn't be too silent. It took some of the anxiety from being alone.
There was a knock on the door. It couldn't be Emily; she still had the spare key. No one else had stopped by since the funeral. Which was fine, they had no responsibility to her now.
She checked the viewfinder. Surprised, she opened the door. "David," Riley exclaimed.
"Hi, Riley," Rossi said brightly. "How are you doing?"
She wouldn't snap at him as she had done to Emily that morning. "I'm… doing better, I think. What are you doing here?"
"I need to speak with you. May I come in?"
The place was a pit, but Riley didn't refuse. She stepped aside and allowed him to enter. She closed the door, immediately embarrassed by the state of the room. "I'm sorry about the mess." She quickly started gathering trash up from the coffee table. "I… haven't found much time to clean."
"Oh, please, don't worry about it." He said, watching her frantically try to make it more presentable. "Trust me, this place looks better than mine after my first marriage broke up."
He took a seat on the sofa. Rossi could tell this was awkward for her. "I never took you for a soap opera fan." He indicated the show on the TV, attempting to lighten the mood. "What is this, General Hospital?"
"Grey's Anatomy, actually," She corrected, grabbing the remote and switching off the screen. "And I'm not… it's just a guilty pleasure. I don't know why, but it's very addicting."
Riley took a seat next to Rossi. For the life of her, she couldn't understand why he was here. She felt a bit exposed, sitting in her pajama pants and Spencer's dress shirt.
"I'm sorry if this is a bit of a surprise for you." He began. "You and I really haven't gotten a chance to get to know each other."
"No," Riley agreed. "I have read all your books, though. I don't think I ever told you, but we did meet once when I was in college. You were doing a book signing in Boston."
"Is that a fact?" Rossi was a little impressed.
"Yeah, I told you about my paper for my abnormal psychology class, on the Archer Addison case you solved… my hair was a lot bigger then, believe it or not."
Rossi nodded, pleased, "Well, I'm sorry I don't remember you, or you're big hair. But then we can't all have an eidetic memory."
The comment didn't go over well with her. It clenched in her like a full body muscle spasm and it hurt just as much. But she nodded, forcing back the tears, waiting for him to continue.
"Well, Riley, I know you're curious, so I'll get to the point. I have a proposition for you." He stated.
He gained her full attention once again; she looked at him in question. What could he possibly want?
"These last few weeks have been difficult for everyone. But I know for a fact they've been the hardest on you. And I don't need Emily to tell me that." He cleared his throat, "I can understand if this will be too hard for you."
"What is it?" Riley asked.
"You know Reid and I often gave lectures. I wasn't aware until recently that… we have one scheduled for the two criminal psychology classes at the academy." He paused, clearing his throat. "If I'm forced to, I'm sure I can handle it myself, but it is easier with a second person. I thought, since this is your area of expertise… you might be interested in taking his place."
With a deep breath, Riley had to look away from him. After a long silence, Rossi continued. "You don't have to answer right now. Think about it tonight and call me in the morning. It's not until this Friday, and I'll make sure to get you all the notes on the lecture. Please, don't feel obligated to accept. I just thought, after Reid… you'd be the best person for the job."
Riley gave a small nod. She didn't say a word, and after another long silence, Rossi stood. "I can let myself out." He said kindly, heading towards the door.
As the door closed, she thought quickly. It really made Spencer feel gone. The others were moving on without him while Riley was desperate to hang on. She couldn't remain like this forever. What about the day she learned Aaron was interviewing for his replacement? Would she still be here, lying on the couch, watching Meredith Grey and Izzie Stevens, telling herself it wouldn't be long before she got back on her feet?
Before he had a chance to get away, Riley rushed to the door. "David," she called just before he reached the corner. "I'll do it."
He gave her a smile. "Thank you. I'll have Emily bring the notes for you and I'll meet you at the BAU on Friday morning."
"Great," She said with a small smile. It was a step forward. At the very least, it got her over the threshold.