Disclaimer: I don't own Digimon.

A New Leaf: Courage

Secret No More

"Ohayo gozaimasu, class! Please find a seat and sit in it, it doesn't matter where as I'm about to assign you all new lab partners anyway. Come along, hurry up!"

There was general distemper at this announcement of Kyako-sensei's, and a great deal of agitated chair-scraping and muttering. Koushiro folded his laptop away with a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach. He hated partner-assignment, especially in computer class. Since he was taking the computing exam a year early, he had been skipped ahead a year in that class and was learning computing with the grade above him. He knew nobody at all save for Taichi and Sora, and they always worked together when they could. Mimi and Yamato didn't take computing. So being assigned a new partner always seemed like dipping one's hand into a bagful of poisonous snakes in search of an earthworm.

"Silence!" Kyako-sensei barked. "Machine one, Nagedashi Arumi and Sheiko Han. Machine two, Funriki Joritsu and Takenouchi Sora. Machine three…" Her voice droned on and on as the students began to rearrange themselves about the room. Koushiro trailed hopelessly over to machine six and plopped into a seat, awaiting the arrival of his partner. He glanced up – and froze.

Taichi seemed similarly uncomfortable. "Ohayo, Koushiro," he muttered, slipping into the chair next to him. There was a brief silence. Then: "Your logon name or mine?"

Koushiro sat back from the console. "Yours, if you like," he said meekly. Taichi entered his name and password, and the two boys sat in silence as the network connected them to the account.

"Look," Taichi said suddenly, just as Koushiro said, "Tai…"

Taichi coughed in embarrassment, and Koushiro looked away. "You first," said the brunette, with uncharacteristic politeness. Koushiro took a deep breath.

"Taichi, I'm sorry I was such a prodigious ass about you and Yamato," he said steadily. Taichi blinked. "I reacted very badly to the situation and it has disrupted our friendship. I'd be enormously grateful if you could… forgive me?"

Taichi noisily blew out a breath he'd been holding, through his cheeks. "Well!" He seemed at a loss for words. "Well!" he said again.

"Is that a 'Well, yes' or a 'Well, no'?" Koushiro prodded the mouse nervously, and it fell off the mouse mat. He tugged it back on by its tail. Taichi threw one of his famed beaming grins at him.

"Sure thing, Kou-man, that'd be cool!"

Koushiro perked his head up. "Really?"

"Yagami and Izumi," their sensei snapped, "perhaps you'd like me to separate you if you can't work together?"

"Iie, Kyako-sensei," Koushiro murmured apologetically.

"Gomen," muttered Taichi, giving her a sour look as soon her back was turned. The two boys exchanged a comradely glance, and got down to work.

* * * * *

"Hey, Koushiro-kun, over here!" The entire canteen turned to stare as Taichi leapt to his feet and waved madly at his redhead friend. Sora ducked her face behind her hand, trying to pretend she didn't know him. Koushiro set his tray down opposite her, a little pink in the face.

"Do you ever do anything quietly?" Sora asked, not unamused. Taichi grinned goofily and forked a heap of rice into his mouth.

"Iie," he said cheerfully with his mouth full. Koushiro smiled to himself and punched his straw into his carton of juice. It dribbled onto the table, in that annoying way that carton juice always does, and Koushiro busily engaged himself in cleaning it up. There was a short period of slightly uncomfortable quiet.

"So…" said Sora eventually. "To what do we owe the honour of seeing you two speaking to each other again?"

Koushiro stared at the table in apparent deep embarrassment, but Taichi shrugged happily. "We got paired in Computing," he explained, "and I guess we're friends now. That's all."

"Oh!" Sora looked vaguely surprised at this simple reconciliation of a two-year-long feud, but was too polite to enquire further. She quickly finished what she was eating and stood, clutching her tray. "I think I'll go to the library and catch up on some homework," she excused herself, and left the two boys alone.

"Thank you for inviting me to eat with you," Koushiro ventured, picking at his lunch.

"Hey, it's no problem! I was looking out for you, but I thought you might be eating with Jou, y'know? But I don't see him anywhere."

"Oh, Jou brings his own lunch now," Koushiro explained. "He usually eats with Yamato." His voice was carefully casual.

There was a slight hesitation in Taichi's movements at the mention of the blond's name, but then he continued shovelling his food into his mouth. "Have you seen him today?" he asked. His voice bore a tone identical to that Koushiro had used.

"Who, Jou? I saw him earlier, in study hall."

"Not Jou," Taichi said irritably. "Yamato. Apparently he wasn't at home last night." He scowled fiercely at his lunch and, unknown to him, Koushiro threw exactly the same expression at his own plate. "It's probably just attention-seeking, knowing him. That's what I told Hikari, anyway," snorted Taichi.

"I haven't seen him," Koushiro said blandly. "But then, I rarely do. Our paths seem not to cross too frequently."

Silence stuck in the air between them. Both were thinking about Taichi and Yamato's deceased relationship, but neither wanted to broach the subject. Taichi cleared his throat. "So what lessons do you have this afternoon?" he asked nonchalantly.

"Chemistry, Geography and double Japanese," Koushiro promptly replied. Taichi winced.

"Tough day."

"Not really. Chemistry and Japanese are mildly interesting, and the Computing class livens up the morning."

"Maybe my Computing grades will go up this semester," Taichi joked. He was talking with his mouth full again. "At least now I'm working with someone who knows what they're doing, even if I'm not sure myself!"

Koushiro looked rueful. "I doubt our partnership will last a substantial amount of time. Kyako-sensei is certain to alter the pairings again within a fortnight."

"Yeah…" Taichi shrugged. "Failing grades, here I come!"

"That's not true, Taichi," his friend objected. "You knew what you were doing well enough this morning. And if you ever require any explanatory advice, you can ask me whether we're class partners or not, you realise."

Taichi grinned and disposed of the last of his rice. "Thanks, Koushiro. Man," and he stared at Koushiro's hardly-touched plate, "you sure do eat slow."

"I've eaten sufficiently," Koushiro replied, standing. He paused. Then, "Do you have any plans for the rest of lunch?" he asked.

"I was gonna go kick some balls about with the guys," Taichi said, leading the way to the tray dump. "Wanna come?"

"Me?" Koushiro looked surprised. "I don't know, Taichi… It's been a while since I played soccer…"

"Aw, come on." Taichi took Koushiro's tray from him and dumped it carelessly onto the pile. "You'll have fun!"

For a moment, Koushiro seemed to waver. Then he sighed and shook his head. "I'd like to, Taichi-kun, really," he said, "but I have to work on a History project. I should go to the computer lab."

"But you were the one who asked if I was free," Taichi pointed out.

Koushiro floundered. "I… erm…"

"Come on," said Taichi firmly, gripping the protesting boy's arm and leading him out of the canteen. "We're playing a game of soccer, and I don't want to hear another word on the subject."

* * * * *

"Well, that prodigiously sucked," Koushiro snapped, pulling his filthy socks from his feet and grimacing at them. "The ball's collided with me twice, tripped me up once, and escaped me completely at least a hundred times. I knew there was a logical reason why I stopped playing this sport. I remember now that I suck at it!"

Taichi clapped him on the back and laughed. "You're just out of practise," he told the furious redhead. "After a few more games –"

"There will be no more games," Koushiro peevishly interrupted him. "I have no desire to make myself appear foolish any more than is absolutely necessary."

"Aw, admit it," Taichi teased. "You had fun."

"I did not."

"Did too!"

Koushiro grinned in spite of himself. "Did not!"

"Did too! Did too did too did too did too did –"

The bell rang, and both boys broke off arguing to gaze at each other in dismay. "We're late!" yelped Taichi, hurriedly stuffing his own socks into his bag and dragging out some clean ones. "Kuso!"

"Tai…" Koushiro looked at him helplessly. "Do you have anymore clean socks in there? I can't go to Chemistry in these, Kujin-sensei is bound to notice."

"Kujin-sensei? Oh, bad luck," Taichi sympathised. "I don't think I…" He broke off to rummage in his bag. "No, sorry."

"Rats," Koushiro muttered. "Well, I'll just have to hope that luck is on my side."

Taichi watched him loosening his laces for a moment. Koushiro looked up at him and blinked. "What's the matter, Tai?" the redhead asked. "You appear to be deep in thought, but surely that can't be right…" He was smiling teasingly. Taichi laughed.

"Here," he said, offering Koushiro the clean socks he had taken from his bag. "You can borrow these, if you want."

"But then you'll get into trouble," Koushiro pointed out reasonably. "I couldn't do that."

"Nah." Taichi grinned. "I've got Literature with Shinjuku-sensei next. Her head's in the clouds, she won't notice. Go on!" he insisted as Koushiro hesitated. "You want to make us even later than we already are?"

That decided it. Koushiro took Taichi's socks with a quick "Arigato!" and began peeling his own wet and muddy socks away from his feet. There was no time to clean his feet before pulling his friend's socks on. "I'll wash them before I return them," he apologised.

"You'd better," returned Taichi. "Now come on, let's go!"

* * * * *

"The answer is no," Koushiro said emphatically, as the two friends picked their way through the crowds leaving the school grounds. "No more soccer. Not tonight and not -" He broke off as he saw Taichi's eyebrows pull down into a deep scowl, and followed the line of his gaze towards the school gates. Yamato's father was reclining against one gatepost, smoking a cigarette. Yamato was nowhere in sight.

"What's he doing here?" Taichi muttered resentfully, slowing his pace a little.

"My theory is," Kouhsiro helpfully supplied, "that, having not seen his son all night, he intends to ensure a meeting by waiting for him outside the school gates."

"Hn." Squaring his shoulders, Taichi strode purposefully at the entrance, deliberately not looking at the man loitering there. Koushiro, unprepared for this action and caught in a sudden throng of older students, was momentarily left behind.

Ishida Masaharu dropped his cigarette stub to the ground and snuffed it out with his heel. "Hey!" he called, starting forward. "Taichi!"

Taichi's scowl deepened so far it almost looked as though his face might swallow itself, but when he turned around, his expression was one of polite, if slightly strained, inquiry. "Konnichiwa, Ishida-san. Can I help you?" He even managed a very brief smile.

"Hai, you can, Taichi. Do you know where I might find Yamato?"

"Iie." Taichi was unable to keep a certain hint of coldness out of his voice, which Masaharu seemed oblivious to. "Perhaps he hasn't told you, Ishida-san, but Yamato and I haven't been friends for a long while now."

"Oh, he's told me." Masaharu nodded seriously. "I know all about you and he. I don't know how your parents feel on the matter, young Taichi, but I can tell you now that you don't need to hide anything from me anymore. All right?"

Taichi froze and went very pale. From the corner of his eye he could see Koushiro standing a little way away, trying to ascertain the gist of the conversation. "Hide… what?" Taichi said, his tone low and dangerous.

"Come on, Taichi, don't make me spell it out." Masaharu seemed faintly amused now. "Your relationship. You and Yamato. In love. It's all right, really," he added, seeing that Taichi had begun to breathe raggedly through his nostrils. "Yamato told me last night. You mean he didn't let you know he'd told me?" The man suddenly looked awkward. "Oh dear. Perhaps I should have let him tell you in his own time. I just assumed -"

Taichi was gone. He pelted across the tarmac and around the corner of the school building, Masaharu staring after him in surprise and Koushiro with deep concern. He almost bumped into a figure his buzzing mind identified as Jou coming past the basketball courts, but he didn't slow his manic sprint. He left the alarmed blue-haired boy in his wake, ignoring his yells, and sped on round the building. He ran blindly and without regard for his fellow students, who took one look at the murderous intent on his face and scrabbled to remove themselves from his path. His mind was set on only one objective - to find Ishida Yamato and kick his sorry homo ass to kingdom come.

And there he was. The self-proclaimed cool one himself, emerging from the deserted music hall complete with prized new guitar. He didn't even see Taichi until the pounding of furious feet prompted him to look up, and even then he had time only to widen his eyes before the brunette was upon him, fists flailing. Yamato staggered and toppled over backwards, dropping his guitar. It made a rather unmusical noise as it hit the concrete. Taichi hoped with great passion that the damned thing was irrepairably smashed to pieces, and fully intended to render Yamato's head to the same state. The blond was yelling bloody murder underneath him and lashing out with his fists, but in his red haze of rage Taichi didn't even feel the punches.

"Kuso yaro!" he screamed, grabbing a handy fistful of collar and ramming the boy repeatedly against the ground by it. Yamato gave up on punching out and raised his arms to protect his face as Taichi embarked upon a barrage of hysterical blows. "Fucking yaro! Wanker! K'so-sucking tell-tat faggot!" He knew most of his punches were being deflected by Yamato's forearms, and this only fuelled his insatiable desire to put the bastard in hospital with every bone in his body broken. He felt one blow connect solidly, and knew that he'd given his rival a black eye. The satisfaction was empty, and he struck out again and again. Yamato was yelling something but Taichi was deaf to all except the voice of his rage. "I'll kill you, I'll kill you!" he was screaming, as Yamato twisted and shouted beneath him. "What gives you the right? Omae o korosu! You're dead!"

He paused. Yamato had ceased struggling and now lay on his side in a foetal position, arms curled over his head protectively. His sides heaved and shuddered with each breath. Taichi climbed slowly to his feet. Yamato didn't move. Taichi laughed scornfully, "You're shaking! You fucking pansy." He spat contemptuously on the blond, then kicked him for good measure and stomped away into the school building.

* * * * *

"Taichi, are you in here?" Koushiro eased open the door to the boys' bathroom another few inches and, seeing that one of the stalls was occupied, slipped inside. "Taichi?"

There was no reply. Frowning, Koushiro crossed to the locked stall and, kneeling awkwardly, peered underneath the door, hoping to catch a glimpse of his friend's sneakers. The stall appeared vacant. Koushiro however had not been skipped forward for one of his classes on account of acute stupidity. He got up, crossed to the main door, pulled it open and then simply stood, waiting for it to spring shut. The sound of it easing closed was followed by a morose sniff from the locked stall. Shuffling footsteps. The lock squeaked, and the door opened. Koushiro stood with his hands on his hips, tapping one sneaker on the tiled floor in an expression of expectancy, but he faltered at the sight of his friend. Taichi's eyes were red and raw, and his mouth was quivering at the corners. He stopped short when he saw Koushiro.

"Aw, fucknuts." And he vanished back inside the stall.

Koushiro was thunderstruck. "Taichi? Kami-sama, are you all right?"

"I'm fine," came the muffled reply. Koushiro raised an eyebrow.

"You look it. Come out, Taichi-kun." A pause. "Please."

The lock scraped back - it was somehow a weary sound - and Taichi re-emerged. He spread his arms in a defenceless gesture. "Come to laugh? Go right ahead."

"Of course I haven't come to laugh!" Koushiro snapped. "I'm your friend, or do you not recall? As a matter of fact, I was concerned!"

Taichi looked suitably chastened. "Gomen," he mumbled. He crossed to the sink and winced at his reflection in the mirror. "I look like shit," he commented. He ran the tap and splashed some cold water on his face. Then he turned, leaning on the basin. Koushiro was watching him patiently. He supposed he'd better get it over with.

"He told his Otousan," Taichi said abruptly. His fists clenched on the sink edge and his arms trembled at the memory of consuming rage. "He fucking tattled!"

"Told him… what?" Koushiro asked hesitantly. "About…?"

"Yes, about," Taichi snarled. "Let's not be dense here, okay? We all know what I mean. Don't make me dirty my mouth by talking about it more than I have to!"

Koushiro recoiled as though he'd been slapped. Taichi immediately became calmer and released the basin, saying, "Gomen, Koushiro, gomen nasai. Here you are trying to be a friend, and I'm being a moron." He snorted. "I guess I'm good at that."

"We can discuss that later," Koushiro said firmly, moving forward with ginger steps that belied his composed tone of voice. "My main concern is, are you all right?"

Taichi opened his mouth to say something, then seemed to change his mind at the last moment. "Iie," he replied honestly. "Iie, not really." He looked frightened suddenly. "What if Ishida-san tells my parents? What then?"

"Well -" Koushiro floundered for a comforting word, found nothing, and so chose to be practical instead. He was better at practical than he was at comforting, at any rate. "Taichi, they will have to know sooner or later. If they love you - and I know they do - they will accept you for who you are. If Ishida-sama doesn't tell them, one day you must."

Taichi stood mute. Then he began to nod, very, very slowly. "Tell them what, exactly?" he asked in carefully measured tones.

"That you're… you know…" It was clear Taichi wasn't about to help him out by making the connection for himself. Koushiro took a deep breath. "Gay."

Taichi erupted. He bounced from the sink as though it were on fire and rounded on Koushiro with an animal ferocity. "I am not gay!" he screamed. "I am not! It was a stupid fucking mistake, that's all. I am not gay, don't you ever call me that!"

Koushiro quaked and nearly wet himself. But as quickly as Taichi's temper had flared up, it subsided again, and he crumpled to his knees, burying his hands in his hair. "Gomen," he apologised brokenly. "Again." He drew a deep breath that wracked his chest. "I think I should just go home before I upset anyone else," he muttered. He made a half-hearted attempt to rise but then gave up, and allowed his head to bow and his shoulders to begin shaking with muted sobs.

"Taichi-kun…" Koushiro was at a complete loss for a course of action. He filled in the time by doing something practical, and gathered some tissue from a stall. He offered it to Taichi, who blew his nose in it rather noisily and continued to cry. Koushiro stood to one side like a dummy, feeling awkward.

"Is there anything I can do?" he asked eventually. Silently he cursed himself. Well that sounded dumb. Taichi shook his head and began to get a grip on himself, and Koushiro fetched him some more tissue.

"You could do something, actually," Taichi said, once he had blown his nose all over again. "Could you please check if Ishida-san is still by the gate?"

Koushiro was grateful for an opportunity to be of some use. "Of course I will. You'll still be here when I get back?" he said cautiously.

Taichi held his hands up. "Promise."

Koushiro nodded and slipped out of the bathroom, trotting down the corridor. He entered Honitsu-sensei's empty biology lab and peered out from behind the blinds. One or two last stragglers were still leaving the school grounds. Ishida-sama was nowhere in sight. Koushiro nodded in satisfaction and made his way back to the boys' bathroom. He happened to glance outside as he walked, and saw Jou and Yamato sat on a low wall together. Jou had his arm around Yamato's shoulders. Koushiro unconsciously set his jaw at the sight of the blond, and paused to glare at his back. Words could not express the immeasurable hate he felt for that boy. He had felt uncomfortable about disliking someone so intensely at first, but as the years passed he had grown used to it, and even developed a certain relish for the twisting black emotion.

"He's gone," Koushiro reported as he re-entered the bathroom. Taichi had gained a grip on himself; although his eyes were still slightly pink he looked much better. Koushiro was relieved. "You want me to walk you home?" he asked.

Taichi shook his head. "I don't want to go home yet. You want to get a shake or something?"

Koushiro appeared mildly surprised at the suggestion, but smiled. "Sounds great," he affirmed.

"Good. Let's get out of here." Taichi grabbed his bag and the two boys left the bathroom and walked down the corridor towards the front door.

The sound of a door squeaking made Koushiro look up. "Um, Tai," he muttered. Taichi glanced up and scowled deeply.

"Keep walking," he said. They both stared straight ahead at the end of the hall as Yamato and Jyou approached, Jou looking a little nervous, Yamato resolute. Taichi and Yamato ignored each other extremely pointedly, although Taichi did note with some satisfaction that blood encrusted Yamato's nostrils.

It's no good. It can't make him un-tell.

Taichi suddenly felt very sick.

"Did you inflict damage on Yamato?" Koushiro asked once they were out of earshot.

"Yep," said Taichi. Koushiro was silent for a moment. "What's the matter? I thought you didn't like him anyway."

"I don't," said Koushiro vehemently. Taichi furrowed his brow.

"Koushiro…"

"Hai?"

"If you didn't know that I wasn't - you know - then why…?" Taichi stopped and looked at him. "How come you started talking to me again?"

Koushiro's features twitched. "I suppose I decided your sexuality wasn't really relevant to our friendship," he said blankly. "At any rate, it's of no consequence now, ne? You said yourself that you aren't homosexual." A very tight smile. Taichi's puzzlement seemed only to grow.

"But if it didn't matter about me, then how come…" He cast an uncomfortable glance back to the school building. "I mean, why do you still hate him?"

A long silence while Koushiro appeared to internally wrestle something. Then,

"How about those milkshakes?"

"Okay," Taichi agreed readily, happy to let any subject involving Yamato drop. The boys walked on.

"'Nii-chan!"

Hikari came tearing up to the pair. "You're late!" she admonished her brother breathlessly. "Okaasan's going mad waiting for you to some home and do the chores. It's your turn, remember?"

Taichi cursed. Hikari shot him a disapproving glance. "Konnichiwa, Koushiro-sempai," she greeted the redhead. "It's nice to see you two on friendly terms again." And she raised an enquiring eyebrow at Taichi, who scowled at her and aimed a friendly swipe in her direction.

"I'd better go," Taichi excused himself. "Sorry about that shake, Koushiro-kun. Some other time?"

"I'd be glad to," Koushiro replied, smiling. "Ja na! Sayonara, Hikari-chan."

"Ja ne, Koushiro-sempai!" Hikari led a uselesly protesting Taichi away, and Koushiro smiled after them both. It was unfortunate about the milkshake, but there would be other opportunities to make up the lost years of friendship. For now, he would go home, do some homework, and wash Taichi's socks.

* * * * *

Ding dong.

"I'll get it," Koushiro offered, rising from the sofa where he was watching a nature documentary with his parents. His homework done and Taichi's socks in the machine, he had no plans for the the rest of the night other than relaxation and pondering over the day's events.

He opened the door and started, then smiled. Jou rarely paid him unplanned calls, although they spent quite a bit of time together outside school. "Jou! What a surprise," he greeted the blue-haired boy warmly. "Come in."

"Arigato." Jou entered, slipped off his shoes and turned to fix Koushiro with a hard look. "You and I need to have a talk about our friend Taichi."

* * * * *

Mweheheh. Ti x