Chapter 11 Return of the Cat Fist
Somewhere in Tokyo 3 a blue Syntec 3 sports car raced around a corner and gunned it on the straightaway. Unlike what you may expect this was not a car chase, nor was it a drag race among some pumped up teenagers. It was just how Misato drove normally. In the drivers seat sat Misato totally transfixed on what was on the radio. She was driving on autopilot. (Author's note: Speed kills. So if you're going to speed, speed slowly.) Shinji had shotgun. Azuka, Rei and Pen Pen were in the back seat. This arrangement was specifically designed by Misato. If Shinji were in the back seat with either Azuka or Rei, really bad things would happen. Rei would try to 'assimilate' Shinji and Azuka would just beat the stuffing out of him. "Now when we get to Ritsuko's I want all of you to be on your BEST behavior do you understand?" "Yes Misato." They all chimed in unison since this was the fourth time she'd said this in the past four, make that five blocks. The blue sports car whipped around another corner then quickly did a 50 km/h parallel park. "Alright everybody out we're here!" Misato beamed cheerfully. Everyone slowly crawled out. Everyone except Pen Pen who had not been wearing his seatbelt. He had gotten thrown to the side of the car during the spin. He looked like one of those stupid Garfield car window stick on things. It was really pathetic. Walking up the stairs to the apartment Shinji had seriously wished that Misato had let him take his bike. Her reason for driving was that they couldn't all fit on Shinji's bike and it would be stupid to take two vehicles. Well stupid from her viewpoint. / Oh man I'm glad I'm not in charge of the body. You must be sick. / ^ Mr. Observant. What did you think? ^ / I think you'd better stay away from Azuka tonight. I don't think she'll make an over effort to stay away from you. / ^ I guessed as much. Damn you and your morality. I couldn't hit her back there on the ship and she creamed me. ^ / Hey don't blame me. The thing I can't understand is how she got a hold of that interdimensional hammer. You need at least a class 3 operators license to use one of those. / ^ I would rather not tangle with one of those again. It seemed like no matter where I moved or dodged it always seemed to hit me. ^ / I don't know how it works, I never could dodge the stupid thing myself. /
Azuka was looking at Shinji. She still couldn't get used to the fact that there were two people in one body and that they talked to each other. It was just too weird for her. Azuka walked into Ritsuko's apartment and threw her jacket onto the post that was in the wall. Rei was next. She too walked in, but she did not have a jacket so she continued into the sitting area. Shinji was the last person to enter the apartment. He was busy talking to Ranma so he really wasn't watching what he was doing. He mindlessly wandered into Ritsuko's living room. Ritsuko's living room where she kept all of her cat figurines, pictures, and various other things relating to cats. Needless to say Ranma flipped. Since he couldn't run he screamed. When he screamed Shinji screamed. Misato who was getting a nice cold beer from the fridge, she heard the scream and took off running. but only after pounding back the beer she was carrying. The rest of the guests at Ritsuko's also came running. When they arrived in the living room they saw Shinji squirming on the ground seemingly in extreme pain. "Get him outside now!" ordered Misato. Once outside Shinji calmed down somewhat although he still twitched sometime. Misato squatted down beside him and put her left arm around his shoulder. "Shinji. Are you ok?" "I. I don't know. I don't know what happened." Shinji said in a confused scared voice. "Well start from the beginning." She said reassuringly. "I walked into the living room then Ranma went crazy. He's blocking me. He won't talk back, Misato I don't know. I just don't know, he's never acted this way before, I'm scared." "Well if you find out what's bothering Ranma then you'll know what's wrong." She smiled. "I'll try." Replied Shinji hesitantly. He closed his eyes and began to concentrate. He dug deeply into Ranma's conscious and then into his subconscious. It was there that he found the wall. He concentrated even harder. Ranma was resisting trying to stop Shinji but since he wasn't in control he couldn't resist very hard. Then it happened. Shinji was standing at the top of a pit. Below him there were hundreds of cats. This was all fine and good except that the cats all looked ravenously hungry and he was tied up with fish cake. Behind him an unseen man in a white gi pushed him into the pit. 'Yes my son. I will make you a great martial artist even if it kills you.' The man said as Shinji hit bottom. Then the cats. This scene was repeated over and over except different fish products were used to tie him up each of the different times. On the final time Shinji let out a primal scream and was jarred out of his trance by a massive slap, courtesy Azuka. "Wake up stupid!" shouted Azuka. Shinji started shaking. "Well did you find out what was bothering Ranma?" Shinji nodded hesitantly. "Well speak up you moron!" Azuka said. She was getting impatient. "C c c cats. Ranma's a a afraid of c c c cats." "Cat's that's stupid! Why would he be afraid of cats?!" "T t t training." Shinji managed to stutter. As if by an act of god Ritsuko's pet cat 'fluffy' walked by and started to rub it's head against Shinji's leg. Shinji jumped and hung upside down from the ceiling. He was noticeably shaking. + This is just great. + Misato sighed + We're doomed. + Rei grabbed fluffy and took her back into the apartment. The rest of the people started filing back in until it was just Misato , Shinji and Azuka in the hallway. Shinji had calmed down a bit. He let go of the ceiling and gracefully flipped to his feet. "I'm going home." Commented Shinji. "Are you sure you're ok?" asked Misato. "Yeah, but if I go back in there I'll just freak out again. Enjoy the party." He said as he turned and jumped off the balcony of the hallway to the street below then jumped to a nearby rooftop and started off for home. "He's got to tell me how he does that." Said Misato with an awed voice. Azuka was amazed too but she'd seen Shinji do amazing things back on the ship so she contained her amazement. She was too busy thinking anyway. + So the amazing Shinji has a chink in his armor after all. + She smiled an evil smile and returned to the party formulating a plan to get her revenge for his behavior on the ship.
At the heart of Central Dogma Gendo was considering Misato's request to separate Shinji and Rei. She had not given a specific reason, but said that it was not working out. He understood. On the outside Rei seemed to be repressed and withdrawn. But meeting Shinji had awakened her senses. She was becoming human. Worst of all she seemed to be attracted to Shinji. This just would not do. It was set then. Rei would have to go. Gendo leaned back in his chair. He did not tip over though. + Those training wheels I installed work wonders. + He thought to himself.
Back at the party Rei was bored. Azuka was no fun and she was the only other person here her age. She had found Ritsuko's goldfish and was having a staring contest with it. Azuka who was as bored as Rei decided to go see what Wondergirl was doing. She looked at Rei then looked at the fish then back at Rei. She scowled. "Stupid, fish don't have eyelids!" "So?" "So?! So fish don't blink!" Rei turned away from the fish to look at Azuka. The fish blinked then turned belly up. Azuka was giving Rei the evil eye. Both Rei and Azuka turned to look at the fish. Their eyes went wide. They looked around to see if anybody had seen them. Seeing nobody they both backed away, turned and ran back to where the adults were getting blasted out of their minds. By the time Shinji made it home Ranma was talking to him again. ^ Why didn't you just tell me! ^ / What was I supposed to say? Ah yes Shinji don't go near cat's or I'll freak out? Yeah right / ^ I guess you're right but you still should have warned me before I went digging around. Now I'm scared of cats. ^ / Sorry about that. Yeah I should have warned you. I guess I should tell you now. If you're exposed to cats for too long you blank out and think you're a cat. / ^ So not only do I turn into a girl, now I turn into a cat! ^ / No not turn into a cat. You just think you're a cat. / ^ And what do I do when I think I'm a cat. ^ / Uhh more or less you shred things, people, small buildings. / ^ Chase mice, birds things like that? ^ / I don't know but yeah probably. I remember waking up with a dead mouse in my mouth once so yeah you probably chase mice. / ^ I hate you, you know that? ^ / Sorry about this. /
Misato didn't come home till early the next morning, she was cooked. Azuka had to drive home. When they walked in the door Rei noticed a message on the answering machine. She pressed the button. 'Misato this is Gendo. Your request has been approved. Rei is to move to apartment 452 and Azuka will move in with you. This is all.' The last sound before he hung up was a loud crash as his training wheels broke. As it turned out apartment 452 was right next door to Misato's. Rei was moving out but she wasn't going far. Gendo couldn't let anything happen to her. It was approaching the time when replacement would become impossible. The next day Misato woke up, her mouth tasted like carpet. Then she realized that her tongue was on the carpet. She rose slowly feeling every crack and crinkle in her 'old' bones. She let out a small grunt when she finally got to her feet. She felt cold for some reason. Reason: She was naked. Logic dictates she should have remembered getting naked but she didn't remember anything past the firemen and the emu incident last night. That was something she wished she could forget. Looking around her apartment she didn't see anybody. She got over to the fridge with a little help from the chair and table. Upon opening the fridge she noticed that most of her beer was gone. There was only one can left. Through the fog that was her brain she remembered that Ritsuko told her that she'd have to bring her own alcohol since Ritsuko couldn't afford to get her drunk. It took most of her supply. Upon downing the last of her beer the fog of last night's drinking battle slowly lifted as the alcohol lubricated her neurons. She slowly wandered about her apartment wondering where everybody was. She slipped into Rei's room and was shocked. What had once been a spartan room was suddenly bulging over with stuff. Even more curious was the fact that some of the stuff had German labels on it. + Since when does Rei know how to read German? + Hearing a commotion in the hallway Misato slipped out of the room. She had some questions that needed answers and they needed answers now. The commotion was Shinji. He, as the only man, had been volunteered to carry the heavy stuff. As Azuka had put it 'What else are men good for?'. Shinji didn't mind. This gave him a chance to work out and show off his now slightly built body. The 'heavy stuff' he was required to carry now was Azuka's 'small' stereo system. ^ She calls 150 pounds per speaker small! ^ / Well it could be worse you could have been asked to carry her underwear and be hit every few minutes for being a 'pervert' believe me I know. / ^ Why do women have to do this to us. Tell us to do one thing then criticize us for doing it wrong? ^ / They're women, I think it's genetic. / ^ Speaking of such. ^ / I see Misato's up. / ^ She looks pissed at something. Options? ^ / Run or stand and find out what she wants then run. / ^ Best find out what she wants. ^ "Shinji." she said sweetly. "WHAT THE HELL IS ALL THIS!!!" "It's Azuka's stuff." "And since when does Azuka live HERE?!" "Well as of last night, dad's orders." "I never got these orders." "Well you were too pissed to remember. You pressed the answering machine message then passed out. Basically it says that Rei is to move next door and Azuka is to move in with us." That seemed sort of logical. She calmed down. "Well can I help with anything?" "Well if you want to but I suggest you put some clothes on it's still pretty chilly out there." Misato's calm disappeared. Her face twisted into a scowl. "Oh yes that. Now who's brilliant idea was that one?" "Well it was Ranma's idea." A bright spotlight suddenly illuminated Shinji. He had a microphone in his hand. "Last night Ranma called out, 'Misato make me your love slave!!' then both of you made wild passionate love for hours." / HEY! I did no such thing. / ^ Now we're even for the cat thing. ^ / Not even close. / ^ Hey! ^ Misato although intrigued by the possibility of Ranma making love to her, could not figure out exactly how he had done so. "Well Ranma maybe next time you can wait till I'm sober to have your way with me." She shot back. / Oh you're really going down for this one. It was your idea to strip her. / Misato trudged off to her room to get her uniform. / Although maybe that wasn't so bad. Thanks Shinji. / ^ But you're a girl! Now I don't know if you're father ever told you about the birds and the bees but some things just don't work! ^ / It'd be fun to try though. Or I could just use your body when you're asleep. / ^ No way you've seen what I look like naked, besides she's old enough to be my mother!^ / I'm old enough to be your father so? What's your point? / ^ I still hate you. You do know that don't you? ^ Breakfast came late that day. Partially because Shinji didn't feel like cooking and partially because Misato couldn't find her curry. (They had of course hid it on purpose.) While everybody was attempting to eat the 'food' she had made, Misato reached under the table and pulled out a bookbag and a girls school uniform. "What's that for?" asked Shinji. ^ Oh man I hope that's not for you, I would just hate it if we transformed back while we were wearing that dress. ^ / Oh come on. / chided Ranma / I think you'd look good in a dress I know I would. / ^ I really hate you, you know that. ^ "No Shinji this is for Azuka." "What?! Why?" Azuka screamed loud enough to make Pen Pen jump. "Well you have to go to school." Misato replied as calmly as she could. "Why should I have to go to school! I've already graduated!" She retorted. Now it was time for Shinji to choke. "GRADUATED? What the hell? You're only 14!" Azuka looked back at him with a smug look on her face. "Of course I've graduated." She tossed her hair. "I am a genius after all." Shinji smiled but said nothing. From Ranma's experiences if he'd said anything he would have been pounded into the ground for being an insensitive jerk. For once having a split personality was a good thing. Well that and all the times Ranma's skills had saved his ass in fights with the Angels. Misato looked at her watch. "Oh shit! We're going to be late. Hurry up!" Bodies were tangled, foots were stepped on in a mad rush to get out of the apartment in time to get to school. Shinji and Azuka rushed out the door only to run into Rei who was standing waiting for them outside her apartment door. The three of them walked down the street when Azuka saw something out of the corner of her eye. Her revenge was now at hand. She rushed over to the object of her desire and picked it up off the ground. "What is it?" asked Shinji. Azuka smiled evilly then quickly spun around shoving the cat into Shinji's face. He screamed and jumped back. When he landed his knees buckled and he landed on his back. Azuka was ready for this. She rushed up to him and shoved the cat into his face and held it there. Shinji squirmed and screamed. Then to everybody's surprise he stopped squirming. Azuka removed the cat and let the poor animal go. She looked down at Shinji. She was smiling ear to ear. Shinji looked up at her. "Well now we're even you baka." Shinji's eyes suddenly narrowed, and he let out a terrifying "Meroooowwwww!" Azuka's smile vanished. This was not part of her plan. He leapt at her and knocked her to the ground. He wound up to strike when Rei tackled him. She wrestled him to the ground but he managed to yank one of his arms free. The next instant Rei was on the ground clutching her face. Shinji had blood on his hand and she blood on her face. He began advancing on her on all fours. He yowled like a wildcat, then crouched to spring. Rei's distraction had bought Azuka enough time. She'd managed to find a lead pipe that had been dislodged from one of the buildings during the numerous battles with the Angels. She ran up and hit Shinji on the back of the head knocking him unconscious. Rei was cowering and showing something akin to fear. "You ok wondergirl?" Rei did not reply she was too busy trying to conceal the wet spot on her dress. She never thought it possible but she felt fear. Fear for her life. She was just a clone, she shouldn't care whether she died or not, but when the moment actually came she found that she didn't want to die. It was quite interesting, if undesirable. "Hey! Wonder what the hell's wrong with you?" "I don't know." She looked at Shinji. "What about him?" "What the hell happened to him?" "He's scared of cats." "Scared of cats! But not ACT like a cat!" Rei gave Azuka a sideways glance. "And just who's fault was that?" Azuka began twiddling her fingers. "Well maybe I did go too far with the cat thing." She looked down at Shinji. "But if you tell him about this you're dead." Rei flinched at the 'dead' part. "Maybe we should get him to a hospital or something?" Rei asked. "Well I guess we should. Just wait a second." Azuka bent down and reached into Shinji's pants. After a few seconds she pulled her hand out. Rei's eyes had an almost Takahashist bulge to them. "What did you do that for?!" Azuka smiled evilly. "Just curious I guess. Now are you going to help me get him to a doctor. We wouldn't want the super psycho man here to get brain damage now would we? He doesn't have much brain to waste." Azuka had Shinji's feet while Rei took his arms. Neither one of them was strong enough to lift him all the way off the ground so sometimes his butt would bounce off the ground. It was a strange site indeed. Two girls dragging an unconscious boy in various directions. Eventually they managed to make it to a clinic. "Dr. Tofu? I've heard that name before somewhere." Azuka commented. Together they hauled Shinji's carcass into the lobby. A lady approximately 50 to 60 years old greeted them. "Hello there." She said sweetly. "How may we help you?" Azuka noticed that the woman was once beautiful but age and second impact had taken it's toll on her. Her hair still had a few brown streaks in it but most of it was white now. Her face had a few wrinkles in it. A scar crossed from the top of her eyebrow and proceeded halfway down her cheek. Her eyes had a glow to them, but there was something else. It was like she'd seen her fair share of death in her life. This was not unusual for survivors, five billion people died almost instantly. "Well our friend here got knocked on the head and he scratched my face." Rei said as she removed her hand from her face to show the scratch Shinji had given her. Kasumi quickly rushed over to Rei and checked her face. Then she checked the still unconscious Shinji. "Well your scratch isn't too bad. It shouldn't leave a scar but we still should put some peroxide on it so it doesn't get infected. As for your friend here he took a nasty blow to the head. We'll have to check him out." She led the trio into the examination room. Sitting on a chair at his desk sat an older man with snow white hair. His eyes fixated on a computer screen. "Dr. Tofu." Chirped the elderly lady. "We have some patients here." The elderly doctor turned around and smiled. The girls were set into an unusual sense of calm. He looked at Rei. "Well it doesn't seem that bad. It shouldn't leave a scar." He gently applied the peroxide to the cuts on her face. The peroxide bubbled and popped but Rei didn't flinch. "So. would you mind telling me exactly what happened here." Dr. Tofu said, directed at no one in particular. Azuka who, with the help of Kasumi, had dumped Shinji face first onto the examination table. Rei started "Our friend Shinji is afraid of cats. It happened a few days ago. Today she," indicating Azuka with a nasty stare. Well as nasty as a non emotional stare can be. "forced a cat into his face and he kinda freaked out." "Freaked out? How?" It was Azuka's turn now. "He went crazy, he started acting like a cat." "He acted like a cat?" This peaked his interest. "Can you show me?" Azuka was confused by this, but she tried to comply to the best she could. She got down on all fours and arched her back like she'd seen Shinji do just before he sprang. She raised her right arm and curled it back into the catfist. "I think this is how it went." She said. Dr. Tofu was bug eyed. Kasumi did a Takahashi fall. "What? What's wrong?" she asked getting up off the floor. "My god I didn't think anybody was that stupid to teach it anymore." Dr. Tofu left Rei and rushed over to where Shinji was laying on the examination table. "What? What are you talking about?" Azuka demanded. "No I can't be wrong." Dr. Tofu was talking to himself as he checked Shinji over. "What is he talking about?" Azuka turned and asked Kasumi. "Well what you just described is the symptoms of cat fist training. A dangerous technique that is extremely powerful but has the drawback of causing the subject to exhibit a great fear of cats and anything catlike. If the subject is exposed to cats for too long they loose control and start acting like a cat." "Who would do such a thing?" chimed in Dr. Tofu. I haven't seen a case of this in over twenty years." "Well he's not exactly normal." Rei said as she got up and went to the sink. "Not exactly normal?" Asked Kasumi. Rei threw the glass of cold water on Shinji's head. Instantly the transformation took place. Kasumi jumped back while Dr. Tofu got closer. "Jusenkyo!" he gasped. "How'd you know about that!" Screamed Azuka. "It's supposed to be top secret!" "Well it just so happens that there was a mad rush of Jusenkyo cursings in the late 1980's early 1990's." "You know." said Kasumi "He kinda looks like Ranma when he was a girl." "You know Ranma?" asked Azuka. "Yeah we knew him but he died almost twenty years ago." Said Kasumi. It was this time that Ranma decided to wake up. "What the hell happened?" Ranma asked clutching his head. "Ranma you jerk. Look what you did to Rei!" Screamed Azuka. "Ranma?" chorused both Dr. Tofu and Kasumi at the same time. Ranma looked around and recognized both Dr. Tofu and Kasumi. "Dr. Tofu. K.Kasumi what are you doing here?" "R.Ranma but how?" "That is a long story." Ranma said as he looked down at the floor. An hour later the entire tale had been told about how Ranma had died then how his spirit had gotten trapped in Shinji's body. Dr. Tofu sat there enthralled, in all of his books that he'd collected about Jusenkyo none of them mentioned the soul of the victim ever getting trapped in the pool. It was extremely fascinating. Then it was their turn. They described how Dr. Tofu had finally proposed to Kasumi, the marriage, and most of the honeymoon. They conveniently left out the part with the police officer, whipping cream, a car battery, jumper cables, and the 1998 Denver Broncos. They also left out the second impact. It was a time they didn't want to talk about since both of them had been working so hard to keep people alive but failed almost every time. Kasumi walked over to where Ranma was sitting. She raised her hand, and. Slapped him as hard as she could. "What the hell?" Ranma said holding his cheek. During all of his time at the Tendo's Kasumi had never reacted violently to anything. "How could you just go off and do something like that?" she scolded him. "Do something like what Kasumi. Die. Hell I really didn't have much choice in the matter. I had a four foot sword sticking out of my chest." He retorted. She calmed down a bit. "Does Akane know?" "Yeah she knows. I think she's fine with it. I think she got over me a long time ago." Ranma said looking her straight in the eyes. "God you are still stupid as always. Yes she married Ryoga but there's always been a corner of her heart reserved for you." "Well she's done just fine with pig boy, and besides she's too old for me now." Interdimensional hammer to the head. "Jeeze Kasumi when the hell did you get your class 3?" "Well just after second impact it was quite violent around here so I went out and got my class 3 interdimensional hammer operator's license." She remarked proudly, then hit him on the head again. "And that was for Ryoga." "What?" "You heard me. What was the deal with keeping Ryoga's secret?" "I gave my word. And." suddenly there was a big explosion far away. Azuka's cell phone rang. ^ I can just guess. ^ / Angel attack. / ^ Why else? ^ Azuka finished talking to the person on the phone. "Well we have to go." "Sorry about this Kasumi." Ranma said. "I need some hot water." "Why?" She said as she walked over to the kettle and poured the rest of the contents into a mug that was lying close by. "Well you see that was probably an Angel." "One of those monsters?" Dr. Tofu said. "Yeah and you see all of us here are pilots of those giant robots." "But you're all only 14, well except for you Ranma, you're an old fart." "Hey I think I look pretty good for forty, but anyway I can't pilot one of those things." She poured the water on his head. Instantly Shinji took over. "But I can." Shinji said. "Who?. Oh wait you're Shinji aren't you?" "Yes. Umm I hate to ask but do you have a car or something, we kinda need to get to Nerv asap." "Sorry but we don't have a car." Dr. Tofu said. "Well then we must be going." Shinji said as he and the girls rushed out. Kasumi turned to her Doctor. "Poor kid, do you think we should tell him." "Now Kasumi you know we can't tell him. She's top secret. I knew what I was doing when I got involved with Nerv." "I know, I still think you did the right thing." "I hope so dear. I really hope so." Shinji and the others were running at top speed towards the access tunnel that would allow them to get to Nerv and ultimately their Evangellions so they could save the world. But that was half a city away, and there was nobody around to give them a lift. ^ We're not going to make it. ^ / You can. / ^ I can't just leave Azuka or Rei. Hey wait a minute. Why did I wake up in a doctor's office, and why does my head hurt? ^ / Cat. / ^ I'm going to kill Azuka. ^ / Hey what happened to Rei's face? / ^ Do you think I did that? ^ / Possibly. But now we have to get to your Eva. / ^ I think I've got a better idea. ^ / What. Oh no. / Shinji ran up to Azuka and grabbed her and hoisted her under one arm. He did the same to Rei. The problem was the way he grabbed both girls would be considered rude and improper in modern society. But with the fate of the world resting on his shoulders a cheap feel couldn't hurt. Right? Right? / Azuka's going to castrate you, you know this don't you? / ^ Oh man. Oh well might as well get some pleasure before the pain. ^ He gave Azuka's right breast a light squeeze, then tweaked her nipple. Her battle aura flared stronger than anything Akane could ever produce. "Now hold on tight." Shinji said to the girls. "This is going to be one hell of a ride." "What are you doing you bakaaaaahh!" Azuka yelled as Shinji launched skyward. His feet landed softly on a rooftop. They immediately broke into a full sprint with him and the girls in tow. He glanced around but could not see any trace of the Angel. ^ It must still be quite a ways away. ^ A giant leap took him and the girls skyward once again and onto another rooftop, then another, and another. Finally they landed on solid ground. He let the girls down. Azuka kissed the ground. She was visibly shaking. Fighting giant space monsters would barely phase her but a little roof hopping made her almost piss her pants. It is a strange life. "That was fun!" Rei said in an almost excited voice. "Can we do it again?" Shinji laughed. "Maybe some other time." He said as both of them ran down the access shaft leaving Azuka kneeling on the ground. She'd catch up later. Their Eva's were prepped and ready to go. A quick change later and Shinji was sitting in the pilot's seat of Unit 01. "Alright let's dance." | Heyyy Macarena! | "Nooooooo" Shinji screamed as he pulled the disk out of his player. "Alright who the hell was fooling around with my Eva?" Ritsuko flinched but said nothing. It was her sick perversion and she didn't want anybody to know about it. She loved the Macarena. "Nevermind." Shinji grumbled as he stuck one of his favorite disks into the player. | War! Huh! Yeah! What is it good for? Absolutely nothing! | "Launch Eva's!" Misato yelled from the control room. Both Eva's shot to the surface. The metal housing around Eva 01 slid away. Shinji looked up at the Angel he was to fight. ^ Oh no. ^
Somewhere in Tokyo 3 a blue Syntec 3 sports car raced around a corner and gunned it on the straightaway. Unlike what you may expect this was not a car chase, nor was it a drag race among some pumped up teenagers. It was just how Misato drove normally. In the drivers seat sat Misato totally transfixed on what was on the radio. She was driving on autopilot. (Author's note: Speed kills. So if you're going to speed, speed slowly.) Shinji had shotgun. Azuka, Rei and Pen Pen were in the back seat. This arrangement was specifically designed by Misato. If Shinji were in the back seat with either Azuka or Rei, really bad things would happen. Rei would try to 'assimilate' Shinji and Azuka would just beat the stuffing out of him. "Now when we get to Ritsuko's I want all of you to be on your BEST behavior do you understand?" "Yes Misato." They all chimed in unison since this was the fourth time she'd said this in the past four, make that five blocks. The blue sports car whipped around another corner then quickly did a 50 km/h parallel park. "Alright everybody out we're here!" Misato beamed cheerfully. Everyone slowly crawled out. Everyone except Pen Pen who had not been wearing his seatbelt. He had gotten thrown to the side of the car during the spin. He looked like one of those stupid Garfield car window stick on things. It was really pathetic. Walking up the stairs to the apartment Shinji had seriously wished that Misato had let him take his bike. Her reason for driving was that they couldn't all fit on Shinji's bike and it would be stupid to take two vehicles. Well stupid from her viewpoint. / Oh man I'm glad I'm not in charge of the body. You must be sick. / ^ Mr. Observant. What did you think? ^ / I think you'd better stay away from Azuka tonight. I don't think she'll make an over effort to stay away from you. / ^ I guessed as much. Damn you and your morality. I couldn't hit her back there on the ship and she creamed me. ^ / Hey don't blame me. The thing I can't understand is how she got a hold of that interdimensional hammer. You need at least a class 3 operators license to use one of those. / ^ I would rather not tangle with one of those again. It seemed like no matter where I moved or dodged it always seemed to hit me. ^ / I don't know how it works, I never could dodge the stupid thing myself. /
Azuka was looking at Shinji. She still couldn't get used to the fact that there were two people in one body and that they talked to each other. It was just too weird for her. Azuka walked into Ritsuko's apartment and threw her jacket onto the post that was in the wall. Rei was next. She too walked in, but she did not have a jacket so she continued into the sitting area. Shinji was the last person to enter the apartment. He was busy talking to Ranma so he really wasn't watching what he was doing. He mindlessly wandered into Ritsuko's living room. Ritsuko's living room where she kept all of her cat figurines, pictures, and various other things relating to cats. Needless to say Ranma flipped. Since he couldn't run he screamed. When he screamed Shinji screamed. Misato who was getting a nice cold beer from the fridge, she heard the scream and took off running. but only after pounding back the beer she was carrying. The rest of the guests at Ritsuko's also came running. When they arrived in the living room they saw Shinji squirming on the ground seemingly in extreme pain. "Get him outside now!" ordered Misato. Once outside Shinji calmed down somewhat although he still twitched sometime. Misato squatted down beside him and put her left arm around his shoulder. "Shinji. Are you ok?" "I. I don't know. I don't know what happened." Shinji said in a confused scared voice. "Well start from the beginning." She said reassuringly. "I walked into the living room then Ranma went crazy. He's blocking me. He won't talk back, Misato I don't know. I just don't know, he's never acted this way before, I'm scared." "Well if you find out what's bothering Ranma then you'll know what's wrong." She smiled. "I'll try." Replied Shinji hesitantly. He closed his eyes and began to concentrate. He dug deeply into Ranma's conscious and then into his subconscious. It was there that he found the wall. He concentrated even harder. Ranma was resisting trying to stop Shinji but since he wasn't in control he couldn't resist very hard. Then it happened. Shinji was standing at the top of a pit. Below him there were hundreds of cats. This was all fine and good except that the cats all looked ravenously hungry and he was tied up with fish cake. Behind him an unseen man in a white gi pushed him into the pit. 'Yes my son. I will make you a great martial artist even if it kills you.' The man said as Shinji hit bottom. Then the cats. This scene was repeated over and over except different fish products were used to tie him up each of the different times. On the final time Shinji let out a primal scream and was jarred out of his trance by a massive slap, courtesy Azuka. "Wake up stupid!" shouted Azuka. Shinji started shaking. "Well did you find out what was bothering Ranma?" Shinji nodded hesitantly. "Well speak up you moron!" Azuka said. She was getting impatient. "C c c cats. Ranma's a a afraid of c c c cats." "Cat's that's stupid! Why would he be afraid of cats?!" "T t t training." Shinji managed to stutter. As if by an act of god Ritsuko's pet cat 'fluffy' walked by and started to rub it's head against Shinji's leg. Shinji jumped and hung upside down from the ceiling. He was noticeably shaking. + This is just great. + Misato sighed + We're doomed. + Rei grabbed fluffy and took her back into the apartment. The rest of the people started filing back in until it was just Misato , Shinji and Azuka in the hallway. Shinji had calmed down a bit. He let go of the ceiling and gracefully flipped to his feet. "I'm going home." Commented Shinji. "Are you sure you're ok?" asked Misato. "Yeah, but if I go back in there I'll just freak out again. Enjoy the party." He said as he turned and jumped off the balcony of the hallway to the street below then jumped to a nearby rooftop and started off for home. "He's got to tell me how he does that." Said Misato with an awed voice. Azuka was amazed too but she'd seen Shinji do amazing things back on the ship so she contained her amazement. She was too busy thinking anyway. + So the amazing Shinji has a chink in his armor after all. + She smiled an evil smile and returned to the party formulating a plan to get her revenge for his behavior on the ship.
At the heart of Central Dogma Gendo was considering Misato's request to separate Shinji and Rei. She had not given a specific reason, but said that it was not working out. He understood. On the outside Rei seemed to be repressed and withdrawn. But meeting Shinji had awakened her senses. She was becoming human. Worst of all she seemed to be attracted to Shinji. This just would not do. It was set then. Rei would have to go. Gendo leaned back in his chair. He did not tip over though. + Those training wheels I installed work wonders. + He thought to himself.
Back at the party Rei was bored. Azuka was no fun and she was the only other person here her age. She had found Ritsuko's goldfish and was having a staring contest with it. Azuka who was as bored as Rei decided to go see what Wondergirl was doing. She looked at Rei then looked at the fish then back at Rei. She scowled. "Stupid, fish don't have eyelids!" "So?" "So?! So fish don't blink!" Rei turned away from the fish to look at Azuka. The fish blinked then turned belly up. Azuka was giving Rei the evil eye. Both Rei and Azuka turned to look at the fish. Their eyes went wide. They looked around to see if anybody had seen them. Seeing nobody they both backed away, turned and ran back to where the adults were getting blasted out of their minds. By the time Shinji made it home Ranma was talking to him again. ^ Why didn't you just tell me! ^ / What was I supposed to say? Ah yes Shinji don't go near cat's or I'll freak out? Yeah right / ^ I guess you're right but you still should have warned me before I went digging around. Now I'm scared of cats. ^ / Sorry about that. Yeah I should have warned you. I guess I should tell you now. If you're exposed to cats for too long you blank out and think you're a cat. / ^ So not only do I turn into a girl, now I turn into a cat! ^ / No not turn into a cat. You just think you're a cat. / ^ And what do I do when I think I'm a cat. ^ / Uhh more or less you shred things, people, small buildings. / ^ Chase mice, birds things like that? ^ / I don't know but yeah probably. I remember waking up with a dead mouse in my mouth once so yeah you probably chase mice. / ^ I hate you, you know that? ^ / Sorry about this. /
Misato didn't come home till early the next morning, she was cooked. Azuka had to drive home. When they walked in the door Rei noticed a message on the answering machine. She pressed the button. 'Misato this is Gendo. Your request has been approved. Rei is to move to apartment 452 and Azuka will move in with you. This is all.' The last sound before he hung up was a loud crash as his training wheels broke. As it turned out apartment 452 was right next door to Misato's. Rei was moving out but she wasn't going far. Gendo couldn't let anything happen to her. It was approaching the time when replacement would become impossible. The next day Misato woke up, her mouth tasted like carpet. Then she realized that her tongue was on the carpet. She rose slowly feeling every crack and crinkle in her 'old' bones. She let out a small grunt when she finally got to her feet. She felt cold for some reason. Reason: She was naked. Logic dictates she should have remembered getting naked but she didn't remember anything past the firemen and the emu incident last night. That was something she wished she could forget. Looking around her apartment she didn't see anybody. She got over to the fridge with a little help from the chair and table. Upon opening the fridge she noticed that most of her beer was gone. There was only one can left. Through the fog that was her brain she remembered that Ritsuko told her that she'd have to bring her own alcohol since Ritsuko couldn't afford to get her drunk. It took most of her supply. Upon downing the last of her beer the fog of last night's drinking battle slowly lifted as the alcohol lubricated her neurons. She slowly wandered about her apartment wondering where everybody was. She slipped into Rei's room and was shocked. What had once been a spartan room was suddenly bulging over with stuff. Even more curious was the fact that some of the stuff had German labels on it. + Since when does Rei know how to read German? + Hearing a commotion in the hallway Misato slipped out of the room. She had some questions that needed answers and they needed answers now. The commotion was Shinji. He, as the only man, had been volunteered to carry the heavy stuff. As Azuka had put it 'What else are men good for?'. Shinji didn't mind. This gave him a chance to work out and show off his now slightly built body. The 'heavy stuff' he was required to carry now was Azuka's 'small' stereo system. ^ She calls 150 pounds per speaker small! ^ / Well it could be worse you could have been asked to carry her underwear and be hit every few minutes for being a 'pervert' believe me I know. / ^ Why do women have to do this to us. Tell us to do one thing then criticize us for doing it wrong? ^ / They're women, I think it's genetic. / ^ Speaking of such. ^ / I see Misato's up. / ^ She looks pissed at something. Options? ^ / Run or stand and find out what she wants then run. / ^ Best find out what she wants. ^ "Shinji." she said sweetly. "WHAT THE HELL IS ALL THIS!!!" "It's Azuka's stuff." "And since when does Azuka live HERE?!" "Well as of last night, dad's orders." "I never got these orders." "Well you were too pissed to remember. You pressed the answering machine message then passed out. Basically it says that Rei is to move next door and Azuka is to move in with us." That seemed sort of logical. She calmed down. "Well can I help with anything?" "Well if you want to but I suggest you put some clothes on it's still pretty chilly out there." Misato's calm disappeared. Her face twisted into a scowl. "Oh yes that. Now who's brilliant idea was that one?" "Well it was Ranma's idea." A bright spotlight suddenly illuminated Shinji. He had a microphone in his hand. "Last night Ranma called out, 'Misato make me your love slave!!' then both of you made wild passionate love for hours." / HEY! I did no such thing. / ^ Now we're even for the cat thing. ^ / Not even close. / ^ Hey! ^ Misato although intrigued by the possibility of Ranma making love to her, could not figure out exactly how he had done so. "Well Ranma maybe next time you can wait till I'm sober to have your way with me." She shot back. / Oh you're really going down for this one. It was your idea to strip her. / Misato trudged off to her room to get her uniform. / Although maybe that wasn't so bad. Thanks Shinji. / ^ But you're a girl! Now I don't know if you're father ever told you about the birds and the bees but some things just don't work! ^ / It'd be fun to try though. Or I could just use your body when you're asleep. / ^ No way you've seen what I look like naked, besides she's old enough to be my mother!^ / I'm old enough to be your father so? What's your point? / ^ I still hate you. You do know that don't you? ^ Breakfast came late that day. Partially because Shinji didn't feel like cooking and partially because Misato couldn't find her curry. (They had of course hid it on purpose.) While everybody was attempting to eat the 'food' she had made, Misato reached under the table and pulled out a bookbag and a girls school uniform. "What's that for?" asked Shinji. ^ Oh man I hope that's not for you, I would just hate it if we transformed back while we were wearing that dress. ^ / Oh come on. / chided Ranma / I think you'd look good in a dress I know I would. / ^ I really hate you, you know that. ^ "No Shinji this is for Azuka." "What?! Why?" Azuka screamed loud enough to make Pen Pen jump. "Well you have to go to school." Misato replied as calmly as she could. "Why should I have to go to school! I've already graduated!" She retorted. Now it was time for Shinji to choke. "GRADUATED? What the hell? You're only 14!" Azuka looked back at him with a smug look on her face. "Of course I've graduated." She tossed her hair. "I am a genius after all." Shinji smiled but said nothing. From Ranma's experiences if he'd said anything he would have been pounded into the ground for being an insensitive jerk. For once having a split personality was a good thing. Well that and all the times Ranma's skills had saved his ass in fights with the Angels. Misato looked at her watch. "Oh shit! We're going to be late. Hurry up!" Bodies were tangled, foots were stepped on in a mad rush to get out of the apartment in time to get to school. Shinji and Azuka rushed out the door only to run into Rei who was standing waiting for them outside her apartment door. The three of them walked down the street when Azuka saw something out of the corner of her eye. Her revenge was now at hand. She rushed over to the object of her desire and picked it up off the ground. "What is it?" asked Shinji. Azuka smiled evilly then quickly spun around shoving the cat into Shinji's face. He screamed and jumped back. When he landed his knees buckled and he landed on his back. Azuka was ready for this. She rushed up to him and shoved the cat into his face and held it there. Shinji squirmed and screamed. Then to everybody's surprise he stopped squirming. Azuka removed the cat and let the poor animal go. She looked down at Shinji. She was smiling ear to ear. Shinji looked up at her. "Well now we're even you baka." Shinji's eyes suddenly narrowed, and he let out a terrifying "Meroooowwwww!" Azuka's smile vanished. This was not part of her plan. He leapt at her and knocked her to the ground. He wound up to strike when Rei tackled him. She wrestled him to the ground but he managed to yank one of his arms free. The next instant Rei was on the ground clutching her face. Shinji had blood on his hand and she blood on her face. He began advancing on her on all fours. He yowled like a wildcat, then crouched to spring. Rei's distraction had bought Azuka enough time. She'd managed to find a lead pipe that had been dislodged from one of the buildings during the numerous battles with the Angels. She ran up and hit Shinji on the back of the head knocking him unconscious. Rei was cowering and showing something akin to fear. "You ok wondergirl?" Rei did not reply she was too busy trying to conceal the wet spot on her dress. She never thought it possible but she felt fear. Fear for her life. She was just a clone, she shouldn't care whether she died or not, but when the moment actually came she found that she didn't want to die. It was quite interesting, if undesirable. "Hey! Wonder what the hell's wrong with you?" "I don't know." She looked at Shinji. "What about him?" "What the hell happened to him?" "He's scared of cats." "Scared of cats! But not ACT like a cat!" Rei gave Azuka a sideways glance. "And just who's fault was that?" Azuka began twiddling her fingers. "Well maybe I did go too far with the cat thing." She looked down at Shinji. "But if you tell him about this you're dead." Rei flinched at the 'dead' part. "Maybe we should get him to a hospital or something?" Rei asked. "Well I guess we should. Just wait a second." Azuka bent down and reached into Shinji's pants. After a few seconds she pulled her hand out. Rei's eyes had an almost Takahashist bulge to them. "What did you do that for?!" Azuka smiled evilly. "Just curious I guess. Now are you going to help me get him to a doctor. We wouldn't want the super psycho man here to get brain damage now would we? He doesn't have much brain to waste." Azuka had Shinji's feet while Rei took his arms. Neither one of them was strong enough to lift him all the way off the ground so sometimes his butt would bounce off the ground. It was a strange site indeed. Two girls dragging an unconscious boy in various directions. Eventually they managed to make it to a clinic. "Dr. Tofu? I've heard that name before somewhere." Azuka commented. Together they hauled Shinji's carcass into the lobby. A lady approximately 50 to 60 years old greeted them. "Hello there." She said sweetly. "How may we help you?" Azuka noticed that the woman was once beautiful but age and second impact had taken it's toll on her. Her hair still had a few brown streaks in it but most of it was white now. Her face had a few wrinkles in it. A scar crossed from the top of her eyebrow and proceeded halfway down her cheek. Her eyes had a glow to them, but there was something else. It was like she'd seen her fair share of death in her life. This was not unusual for survivors, five billion people died almost instantly. "Well our friend here got knocked on the head and he scratched my face." Rei said as she removed her hand from her face to show the scratch Shinji had given her. Kasumi quickly rushed over to Rei and checked her face. Then she checked the still unconscious Shinji. "Well your scratch isn't too bad. It shouldn't leave a scar but we still should put some peroxide on it so it doesn't get infected. As for your friend here he took a nasty blow to the head. We'll have to check him out." She led the trio into the examination room. Sitting on a chair at his desk sat an older man with snow white hair. His eyes fixated on a computer screen. "Dr. Tofu." Chirped the elderly lady. "We have some patients here." The elderly doctor turned around and smiled. The girls were set into an unusual sense of calm. He looked at Rei. "Well it doesn't seem that bad. It shouldn't leave a scar." He gently applied the peroxide to the cuts on her face. The peroxide bubbled and popped but Rei didn't flinch. "So. would you mind telling me exactly what happened here." Dr. Tofu said, directed at no one in particular. Azuka who, with the help of Kasumi, had dumped Shinji face first onto the examination table. Rei started "Our friend Shinji is afraid of cats. It happened a few days ago. Today she," indicating Azuka with a nasty stare. Well as nasty as a non emotional stare can be. "forced a cat into his face and he kinda freaked out." "Freaked out? How?" It was Azuka's turn now. "He went crazy, he started acting like a cat." "He acted like a cat?" This peaked his interest. "Can you show me?" Azuka was confused by this, but she tried to comply to the best she could. She got down on all fours and arched her back like she'd seen Shinji do just before he sprang. She raised her right arm and curled it back into the catfist. "I think this is how it went." She said. Dr. Tofu was bug eyed. Kasumi did a Takahashi fall. "What? What's wrong?" she asked getting up off the floor. "My god I didn't think anybody was that stupid to teach it anymore." Dr. Tofu left Rei and rushed over to where Shinji was laying on the examination table. "What? What are you talking about?" Azuka demanded. "No I can't be wrong." Dr. Tofu was talking to himself as he checked Shinji over. "What is he talking about?" Azuka turned and asked Kasumi. "Well what you just described is the symptoms of cat fist training. A dangerous technique that is extremely powerful but has the drawback of causing the subject to exhibit a great fear of cats and anything catlike. If the subject is exposed to cats for too long they loose control and start acting like a cat." "Who would do such a thing?" chimed in Dr. Tofu. I haven't seen a case of this in over twenty years." "Well he's not exactly normal." Rei said as she got up and went to the sink. "Not exactly normal?" Asked Kasumi. Rei threw the glass of cold water on Shinji's head. Instantly the transformation took place. Kasumi jumped back while Dr. Tofu got closer. "Jusenkyo!" he gasped. "How'd you know about that!" Screamed Azuka. "It's supposed to be top secret!" "Well it just so happens that there was a mad rush of Jusenkyo cursings in the late 1980's early 1990's." "You know." said Kasumi "He kinda looks like Ranma when he was a girl." "You know Ranma?" asked Azuka. "Yeah we knew him but he died almost twenty years ago." Said Kasumi. It was this time that Ranma decided to wake up. "What the hell happened?" Ranma asked clutching his head. "Ranma you jerk. Look what you did to Rei!" Screamed Azuka. "Ranma?" chorused both Dr. Tofu and Kasumi at the same time. Ranma looked around and recognized both Dr. Tofu and Kasumi. "Dr. Tofu. K.Kasumi what are you doing here?" "R.Ranma but how?" "That is a long story." Ranma said as he looked down at the floor. An hour later the entire tale had been told about how Ranma had died then how his spirit had gotten trapped in Shinji's body. Dr. Tofu sat there enthralled, in all of his books that he'd collected about Jusenkyo none of them mentioned the soul of the victim ever getting trapped in the pool. It was extremely fascinating. Then it was their turn. They described how Dr. Tofu had finally proposed to Kasumi, the marriage, and most of the honeymoon. They conveniently left out the part with the police officer, whipping cream, a car battery, jumper cables, and the 1998 Denver Broncos. They also left out the second impact. It was a time they didn't want to talk about since both of them had been working so hard to keep people alive but failed almost every time. Kasumi walked over to where Ranma was sitting. She raised her hand, and. Slapped him as hard as she could. "What the hell?" Ranma said holding his cheek. During all of his time at the Tendo's Kasumi had never reacted violently to anything. "How could you just go off and do something like that?" she scolded him. "Do something like what Kasumi. Die. Hell I really didn't have much choice in the matter. I had a four foot sword sticking out of my chest." He retorted. She calmed down a bit. "Does Akane know?" "Yeah she knows. I think she's fine with it. I think she got over me a long time ago." Ranma said looking her straight in the eyes. "God you are still stupid as always. Yes she married Ryoga but there's always been a corner of her heart reserved for you." "Well she's done just fine with pig boy, and besides she's too old for me now." Interdimensional hammer to the head. "Jeeze Kasumi when the hell did you get your class 3?" "Well just after second impact it was quite violent around here so I went out and got my class 3 interdimensional hammer operator's license." She remarked proudly, then hit him on the head again. "And that was for Ryoga." "What?" "You heard me. What was the deal with keeping Ryoga's secret?" "I gave my word. And." suddenly there was a big explosion far away. Azuka's cell phone rang. ^ I can just guess. ^ / Angel attack. / ^ Why else? ^ Azuka finished talking to the person on the phone. "Well we have to go." "Sorry about this Kasumi." Ranma said. "I need some hot water." "Why?" She said as she walked over to the kettle and poured the rest of the contents into a mug that was lying close by. "Well you see that was probably an Angel." "One of those monsters?" Dr. Tofu said. "Yeah and you see all of us here are pilots of those giant robots." "But you're all only 14, well except for you Ranma, you're an old fart." "Hey I think I look pretty good for forty, but anyway I can't pilot one of those things." She poured the water on his head. Instantly Shinji took over. "But I can." Shinji said. "Who?. Oh wait you're Shinji aren't you?" "Yes. Umm I hate to ask but do you have a car or something, we kinda need to get to Nerv asap." "Sorry but we don't have a car." Dr. Tofu said. "Well then we must be going." Shinji said as he and the girls rushed out. Kasumi turned to her Doctor. "Poor kid, do you think we should tell him." "Now Kasumi you know we can't tell him. She's top secret. I knew what I was doing when I got involved with Nerv." "I know, I still think you did the right thing." "I hope so dear. I really hope so." Shinji and the others were running at top speed towards the access tunnel that would allow them to get to Nerv and ultimately their Evangellions so they could save the world. But that was half a city away, and there was nobody around to give them a lift. ^ We're not going to make it. ^ / You can. / ^ I can't just leave Azuka or Rei. Hey wait a minute. Why did I wake up in a doctor's office, and why does my head hurt? ^ / Cat. / ^ I'm going to kill Azuka. ^ / Hey what happened to Rei's face? / ^ Do you think I did that? ^ / Possibly. But now we have to get to your Eva. / ^ I think I've got a better idea. ^ / What. Oh no. / Shinji ran up to Azuka and grabbed her and hoisted her under one arm. He did the same to Rei. The problem was the way he grabbed both girls would be considered rude and improper in modern society. But with the fate of the world resting on his shoulders a cheap feel couldn't hurt. Right? Right? / Azuka's going to castrate you, you know this don't you? / ^ Oh man. Oh well might as well get some pleasure before the pain. ^ He gave Azuka's right breast a light squeeze, then tweaked her nipple. Her battle aura flared stronger than anything Akane could ever produce. "Now hold on tight." Shinji said to the girls. "This is going to be one hell of a ride." "What are you doing you bakaaaaahh!" Azuka yelled as Shinji launched skyward. His feet landed softly on a rooftop. They immediately broke into a full sprint with him and the girls in tow. He glanced around but could not see any trace of the Angel. ^ It must still be quite a ways away. ^ A giant leap took him and the girls skyward once again and onto another rooftop, then another, and another. Finally they landed on solid ground. He let the girls down. Azuka kissed the ground. She was visibly shaking. Fighting giant space monsters would barely phase her but a little roof hopping made her almost piss her pants. It is a strange life. "That was fun!" Rei said in an almost excited voice. "Can we do it again?" Shinji laughed. "Maybe some other time." He said as both of them ran down the access shaft leaving Azuka kneeling on the ground. She'd catch up later. Their Eva's were prepped and ready to go. A quick change later and Shinji was sitting in the pilot's seat of Unit 01. "Alright let's dance." | Heyyy Macarena! | "Nooooooo" Shinji screamed as he pulled the disk out of his player. "Alright who the hell was fooling around with my Eva?" Ritsuko flinched but said nothing. It was her sick perversion and she didn't want anybody to know about it. She loved the Macarena. "Nevermind." Shinji grumbled as he stuck one of his favorite disks into the player. | War! Huh! Yeah! What is it good for? Absolutely nothing! | "Launch Eva's!" Misato yelled from the control room. Both Eva's shot to the surface. The metal housing around Eva 01 slid away. Shinji looked up at the Angel he was to fight. ^ Oh no. ^