A/N: There are several excellent questions to answer this time! Yes, you will find out why the Hr/R thing is going on. But not for a very very very long time. Sorry. And you will get more Ron. Eventually. I actually have never considered writing a L/MWPP Quiddtich fic before. I may have to try it…

Hermione and Harry appeared at the breakfast table in the Great Hall at 6.00, looking bleary-eyed and annoyed.

"I cannot believe the time," said Hermione, sitting down at the Gryffindor table with a thump, and reaching for the porridge.

"You brought this upon yourself, you know," said Harry, rubbing his bloodshot eyes. "You didn't have to do this."

"Oh stop grumping at me," Hermione snapped. "I hate it when you don't get enough sleep."

"Likewise," said Harry shortly. "But I wasn't saying goodbye to Ron for half the night. Honestly. You'd think that you would never see him again, much less see him in a few weeks."

"Six weeks."

"That's like, only a second to Nicolas Flamel," Harry quoted.

"I didn't ask you."

"No, I was merely quoting your wise and clever sayings. Practice what you preach."

"Go get some tea, if you can't be civil, and wake yourself up."

"I hate tea."

"If you don't get something with caffeine in it, I will ram it down your throat."

"Fine!" said Harry, getting up in a huff. "But you get some too."

"I'm not the one who's in a temper today."

"Yes you are."

"Am not!"

"Are too!"

"Am not!"

"Fight nice, children." Lily walked in, looking irritatingly perky.

"Yeah, what was that row?" Sirius came in as well, looking as happy as Harry had ever seen him.

"Nothing," Hermione and Harry mumbled together.

"Oy, what in blazes was that?" James ambled in as well, looking only less slightly perky than Lily.

"Harry are you being obstinate and argumentative?" asked Lily.

"Yes," volunteered Hermione.

"I figured," Lily sighed, "James is always like that when sleep deprived."

"Hey!" Exclaimed James, "I am not!"

"Are too."

"Am not."

"Are too."

"Am not."

"Fight nice, children," said Harry and Hermione at the same time, grinning.

"What the devil is going on," Remus walked into the Great Hall. "Oh, it's Lily and James. I should have known." He sat down and reached for the porridge. "I advise that you two finish up, you have ten minutes left."

"You're not going to make us leave without finishing, are you?" Hermione looked flabbergasted.

"Nine minutes," said Remus.

~**~

"Well," said Remus nine minutes later. "It certainly feels good to be back in school again. Don't you agree?"

Harry decided it would be polite to refrain from commenting, especially after what happened at breakfast.

"Now, Voldemort will probably attempt to unleash upon you all the powers of his unholy hell that he's got. Not only will you both have to combat with deatheaters, but Lethifolds, blood sucking bugbears, gromagnics, teellihores, vampires, hags, veelas, basilisks and various other appealing creatures. You must learn how to deal with them each separately, and learn how to defeat them."

Hermione put up her hand.

"Don't bother with hand raising, since there's only two of you," Remus smiled, "just ask."

"I'm sorry professor, I've heard of vampires, hags, veelas, basilisks, and even lethifolds…but…"

"What's a lethifold?" Somehow, Harry felt he didn't want to know.

"A creature that looks like a cloak, it smothers you to death, and can only be defeated by a Patronus," said Remus. "But what, Hermione?"

"I've never heard of a gromagnic, or a teellihore. They're not in Magical Beasts and Where to Find Them."

"Quite right. Gromagnics and teellihores are not…precisely animals."

"What are they?"

"Well…this won't be very pleasant, I'm warning you. I've never even dealt with one. I very much doubt that I could."

"And?" Harry prompted.

"A teellihore is a human, or used to be. It is a dead human sentenced to purgatory. The dark lord can force it to do his bidding by conjuring one up. They tend to fall apart after a while, because they have to use the bodies they had on earth, and they're normally rotting, but they're expendable, which is why their common name is a hand."

Harry shuddered, thinking of Wormtail, and how expendable Voldemort thought human hands to be.

"The worst of it is, they still have human countenances, human souls. They know what they are doing, and know they shouldn't be doing it, but they can't stop themselves. When a dark lord is feeling particularly malicious, he sends after you a hand that you used to know."

Hermione gasped. "You mean if your grandmother was in purgatory, he could send her after you to murder you?"

"Precisely. That's why you need to be prepared. People tend to show more mercy toward dark creatures when they look like people they used to know."

"What happens to a teellihore after they're defeated?" Harry asked. "Do they go back to purgatory?"

"No one really knows, except the teellihore themselves, and no one has really thought to ask one, I suppose."

"What about the other…the…Gromagnic?" asked Hermione.

"A Gromagnic is a demon. Yes, that's right, straight from Hell. A Dark Lord can conjure one up to do his bidding, but, of course, with the price that the dark lord will join them in Hell once they're finished.  Demons are can destroy with a glance. The only way to get rid of one is to send it back to Hell, where it belongs. Such a doing takes an immensely powerful wizard, if that, normally it takes a mage. That will probably be your job, Harry."

"Wonderful," said Harry in mock cheerfulness. "Why have fun playing with the death eaters when I can fight a demon from Hell?"

~**~

"Transfiguration can be a very long and complicated process of wand waving and incantations," said James. "But I find all that really unnecessary. Hermione, unfortunately for you, you must go through the wand waving and incantations. You see, only a mage can do wandless magic. However, while Hermione is studying, Harry, you will be in bed with an ice pack over your head from a blistering head ache."

"Yeech," said Harry. "Why?"

"It's simply the after-affects of wandless magic.  Blistering head aches often are. Other symptoms include vomiting, and complete insomnia."

"Sounds like loads of fun."

"Oh believe me, it is."

"Tell me again, Dad, why are we doing wandless magic?"

"Oh the symptoms go away after you've done it enough, it's just in the beginning that you get all the appealing side effects. Now, let me show you how this is done." James reached into the air above his head, and pulled, as if pulling down a window-shade. He pulled the air down the length of his body, and, oddly enough, when his hand passed over himself, it changed into the very image of Professor McGonagall. James folded his arms over one another, and pressed his lips together.

"Potter!" He (or she, Harry really couldn't tell which,) said in Professor McGonagall's sternest voice, "What have you done now that you need a detention for?" James rapidly pulled the air again and changed into himself.

"Nothing Professor," he said flashing a trademark grin. He pulled the air again.

"As if you expect me to believe that story Potter. Were you the one who painted the Slytherin common room pink?" He pulled the air yet again, and changed back into himself.

"No Professor," he said, opening his eyes wide in an innocent-as-a-baby look. "How could you think that I of all people could do such a thing?" Back to McGonagall.

"Twenty points from Gryffindor. No buts, Potter." James changed back into himself and grinned as his applauding pupils.

"That was amazing!" said Harry. "You looked just like her!"

"Could you change into anybody?" asked Hermione

"Yes," said James proudly. "As long as I have seen them first. Now, for the real lesson. Hermione, if you could pick an eye colour, what would it be?"

"Blue, I suppose," said Hermione looking startled. "Brown is just so boring."

"I resent that comment," said James, his brown eyes smiling down at her. "Now, I want you and Harry to both think of an eye colour that you want, think about nothing else."

Both stared at him, then obediently closed their eyes and concentrated.

"Now," said James, "Harry, reach up into the air, just above your eyes. Do you feel anything?"

"No," said Harry, "Wait…yes, kind of a hook thing."

"Good. Reach for it, and pull just past your eyes. Don't go any further, or else the rest of you will turn the colour that you're thinking. Now Hermione, take out your wand and say 'oculous transformus.'"

"Oculous transformus." Hermione spoke, and Harry pulled at the same time.

"Ouch!" Harry grabbed his head, "This is not fun."

"No, but it means you did it right," said James. "Here's a mirror. You can both open your eyes now." Harry and Hermione opened their eyes, and looked in the mirror. Hermione's eyes were a deep blue and Harry's were…brown. Plain dark brown. The very colour of James' eyes.

"Pretty useful, huh Dad?" said Harry, "If I get rid of the scar, I could be you!"

"Grow another foot or so, and I'll think about it." James grinned, pulled the air again, and grew short, with green eyes and a scar. "I can't duplicate the scar exactly," said James, "but I can get close enough to make most people think I'm Harry Potter."

"We're going to have fun with this," said Harry who now looked like James, grinning James' evil grin.

~**~

A/N: YAY! EASTER BREAK! I'll try to put out more now that I'm off…so be on the lookout. Oh, and to answer one more question…no I don't have an email list for when the story comes out. I'm not nearly competent enough on the computer for something like that. : D