Disclaimer: Obviously, I don't own any of the characters, no matter how much I WISH I did. They belong to the wonderful owners of Passions and NBC
I~ Thanks to all of you whom replied, telling me that you like it! It's encouraged me to write this chapter faster then I would have, and make it really long! So I hope you'll enjoy this, and please, REPLY! Again if you did before, and for the first time if you didn't before.
And, I couldn't take it, I'm sorry, but I just can't write a fan fic without Sam and Ivy, I tried, I really did, but . . . there going to be in . . . Sam's already pinning for her. **SOB** I'm so weak!
This chapter is rated . . . oh I don't know, I'm never a good judge of these types of things! ~/I
bBarely Breathing/b
IBy Jules/i
IbChapter 3/I/b
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"Oh, I am so sorry Ivy!" Sam exclaimed, helping her up immediately once he saw who it was he'd slammed into.
"It was my fault." Ivy insisted, brushing herself off.
"No, it was mine." Sam argued.
At the same time they both say, "I wasn't paying attention to where I was going."
Ivy gave in, smiling, "If it will make you feel better, alright, it's all your fault."
Sam laughed, "Thank you. So, what are you doing here on the beach on such a cold day?"
"This is where I've always come to think. It's something I started years ago, with this boyfriend I had ages ago. We used to come here together, and I've been coming here to think things out ever sense." Ivy explained, alluding to their past relationship.
Sam smiled at the memory, "Ahhh yes, I had a girlfriend who I used to come here with too. Which is why I bought a house on the beach to live in, after I tell my wife I'm leaving her that is."
Ivy's eyes widened in surprise and her heart was in her throat, "Is that so? Hmm, I should have thought of that. Right now, I'm stuck living in a hotel."
"What was so special about this boyfriend that it makes you come here to think?"
Ivy smiled, her heart revealing itself, "He was the love of my life. The only man I ever loved, and the only person who ever cared about me, before my children. I wanted to marry him some day . . . . He was so handsome too. Athletic build, great hair, and when he smiled at me, my heart just skipped a beat." She grinned coyly, then turned it onto Sam, "What about you, what was so special about that girlfriend of yours?"
"Oh she was the most beautiful girl I'd ever seen. Her blond hair was so long and soft. And she had this way of looking at me, so adoringly, loving me completely. I loved her with every fiber of my being."
The sexual tension in the air is at a maximum high, Sam looked down at Ivy, who unconsciously took a step closer to him, looking up at him, and she licked her lips.
That was the breaking point for Sam, he pulled her close to him and kissed her with everything he had in him. Ivy responded passionately. Both had been holding this back for years, and they couldn't take it anymore.
Sam swept her off her feet, literally, and then rushed her up to his new house. He some how opened the door and kicked it closed behind him. He carried up the stairs, into the master bedroom.
They kissed and tore at each other's clothes wildly. Ivy legs wrapped around Sam's waist, bringing him closer to her as they kissed. Shirts were thrown in unknown corners, pants pulled off . . .
Kissing each other all over their bodies, not able to get enough of each other.
Wild, animal lust, and love ruled their bodies and they made passionate love long into the night.
It was late at night when, both lay there panting, Ivy lying on Sam's chest, muttering to herself.
Sam kissed the top of her head, "Is something wrong?"
"I don't know how to tell you . . . it's just that . . . I've wanted to tell you this for so many years"
"What Ivy?" Sam questioned.
Ivy continued, not even hearing him, "But my father said he'd kill you both if I did."
"WHAT?!"
Ivy rambled on, "Even after he died, I couldn't tell you. It was so complicated by then, and as the years went on, it just got harder and harder to say . . . even though he threatened you I mean. I thought you wouldn't understand. That you couldn't understand." Ivy prattled.
"What did you want to tell me that your father would kill me and whomever for?" Sam asked scared, somehow sensing what her answer most likely would be.
"That I was pregnant all those years ago when you left me." Ivy finally got out, and then said more softly, "That Ethan really is your son."
~*~
b** Luis and IKay's/I apartment **/b
Hank moved the last of Ihis/I boxes into his Jeep, and Kay's were sitting in the living room. He said his good-byes, then drove off, to Sheridan's.
Now Luis and Kay stood in the middle of the empty bedroom, opening cans of golden yellow paint. The windows open to make all the paint fumes leave the apartment.
They turned on the radio and got to work. They were on the third wall, when a song came on, that obviously effected Kay.
~*~*~*~*~*~
I I'm only pretty sure that I can't take anymore
Before you take a swing
I wonder
What are we fighting for?
When I say outsold
I want to get out of this
I wonder as there anything
I'm going to miss /I
~*~*~*~*~*~
Kay pretended that she didn't hear the song, and kept painting the wall
She used to play the song all the time, and it had been one of her favorites. But now it just seemed to tell all what was wrong between her and Miguel, except that she Idid/I care.
~*~*~*~*~*~
II wonder how it's going to be
When you don't know me
How's it going to be
When you're sure I'm not there
How's it going to be
When there's no one there to talk to
Between you and me
Cause I don't care
How's it going to be
How's it going to be /I
~*~*~*~*~*~
Luis noticed the guarded look on Kay's face, and silently watched her as he painted, keeping a close eye on his new roommate. He really didn't understand how people could believe she was so strong, when it was so obvious she needed people so much if anyone actually took the time to look.
~*~*~*~*~*~
IWhere we used to laugh
There's a shouting match
Sharp as a thumbnail scratch
A silence I can't ignore
Like the hammock by the
Doorway we spent time in swings empty
Don't see lightning like last fall
When it was always about to hit me /I
~*~*~*~*~*~
He was truly seeing Kay for what she really was for the first time in his life, a deeply hurting, confused, frail girl, who needed to be loved, more then anybody had ever noticed.
Luis had never wanted to kick his brother's ass more then he did right at that moment.
~*~*~*~*~*~
I I wonder how's it going to be
When it goes down
How's it going to be
When you're not around
How's it going to be
When you found out there was nothing
Between you and me /I
~*~*~*~*~*~
Kay kept pretending the song wasn't getting to her, she had to stay strong. People had to believe that she was as tough as the outward appearance she gave off.
She couldn't allow herself to be weak, that's what people prey on. Your weaknesses, and if they couldn't see them, they couldn't hurt her anymore.
~*~*~*~*~*~
ICause I don't care
How's it going to be
And how's it going to be
When you don't know me anymore
And how's it going to be /I
~*~*~*~*~*~
But Kay finally crumbled, she couldn't hold it in anymore. Her knees gave out, and she sunk to the floor, tears running down her face as she mourned.
Luis rushed to her held her, and let her cry on someone's shoulder for once.
~*~*~*~*~*~
IWant to get myself back in again
The soft dive of oblivion
I want to taste the salt of your skin
The soft dive of oblivion oblivion
How's it going to be
When you don't know me anymore
How's it going to be
How's it going to be
How's it going to be /I
~*~*~*~*~*~
She cried for the things that she'd lost, her home, her family. She cried for the ache in her heart that Miguel had caused. Kay cried for the loneliness, and the pain it caused in her soul when she saw Miguel with Charity, or all those times she'd heard him tell Charity 'I love you'. She cried for the girl that she used to be, who had slowly and agonizingly, died in the past year. She cried for many things.
Luis could practically feel the pain radiating off her. He held her close in his strong arms, hoping she would take hold of some of his strength or at least know that he was here for her, rocking her back and forth.
Slowly, her sobs abated, but they both still sat there; Kay taking solace in Luis caring, and Luis still desperately wanting to help her, but guiltily enjoying the feeling of her in his arms
Luis prayed the crying had helped wash the pain from her heart, and wasn't a sign that she was even more unhappy. He listened to her breathing grow deep and even as he still rocked, and felt her body relax.
He knew she'd fallen asleep, so he carried her back into his room, laid her on to his bed, then covered her. He watched her sleep for awhile, then went and finished painting the room. He set up a few fans, one focussed on each wall, the closed the windows until they were only opened a crack and put on the window safety, so they'd be open, but no one could climb the fire escape and enter the second floor apartment.
At long last, he settled himself for another long night on the couch.
~*~
b** Still in bed at Sam's new house on the beach **/b
"But you said that . . ."
"I know what I said Sam," Ivy burst out, then sighed resignedly, "I was scared. Scared of Julian, scared of Alistair. Scared of losing the only things I had left after losing everything that was important to me. But I'm finally out of their clutches. And since then I've been trying to figure out a way to tell you, that not only do we have a son. But that you're going to be a Grandfather too."
"Could you repeat that?" Sam requested dumfounded.
Ivy smiled, "Theresa's three months pregnant. Apparently, they had a lot of fun on that honeymoon, and they left so quickly, they forgot Theresa's birth-control . . . . Are you angry with me?" she questioned fearfully.
"Are you kidding?! Hell no! I just found out the woman I love and I had a son together! And he's going to become a father!" He hugged her tightly, reassuring her.
Ivy sighed the biggest sigh of relief in her life, "I was frightened you would hate me."
"I wasted too many years being mad at you, and hating you. I will never, ever, make that mistake again." He vowed.
Sam kissed her to seal his promise and made love to her again.
b** A bit later **/b
"How did you get Julian to divorce you?" Sam questioned Ivy suddenly, as they lay there.
"It was simple actually, blackmail. I just used a picture of him in bed with some whore, and had the girl, changed into a guy, by brilliant son John, who is a photographer and knows his way around a computer. I knew Julian would never tell anyone, because the Crane's don't need anymore scandal after Ethan left Gwen at the alter and ran off with, as Rebecca Hotchkiss would say, the housekeeper's trollop daughter." Ivy told him honestly, laughing.
"What will they do when they find out about Ethan?"
"Nothing, just try to keep it quiet. They can't because Ethan's wife is a pregnant fashion designer who just hit it big, his real father is a police chief. And no matter what 'pull' they have with the mayor, as an ex-governor's daughter, I have more." Ivy told him smugly.
"Does anyone else know that Ethan's my son?"
"Only Pilar, and she has all the proof in an attaché case at her house. I couldn't leave it where Julian might find it. It has documents that prove you are the father." Ivy told him, yawning.
Eventually, Ivy feel asleep, exhausted from the emotional, and physical events of the previous day. While Sam stayed up a bit longer, thinking of what Ivy had told him, absentmindedly playing with her hair.
b** Around midnight **/b
Sam reluctantly slipped his arm out from Ivy and got dressed. He had to get home, no matter how much he wanted to stay. He quickly dressed, and wrote a note to Ivy, apologizing for leaving while she was asleep. And telling that, he loved her.
He left the note on the nightstand, then closed and locked the door behind him, and reluctantly drove home to his 'loving' wife.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Please, I want replies, I know it sounds pathetic, but I live for feedback, good or bad! I need to know what you think so I know where to go with this.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
I~ Thanks to all of you whom replied, telling me that you like it! It's encouraged me to write this chapter faster then I would have, and make it really long! So I hope you'll enjoy this, and please, REPLY! Again if you did before, and for the first time if you didn't before.
And, I couldn't take it, I'm sorry, but I just can't write a fan fic without Sam and Ivy, I tried, I really did, but . . . there going to be in . . . Sam's already pinning for her. **SOB** I'm so weak!
This chapter is rated . . . oh I don't know, I'm never a good judge of these types of things! ~/I
bBarely Breathing/b
IBy Jules/i
IbChapter 3/I/b
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"Oh, I am so sorry Ivy!" Sam exclaimed, helping her up immediately once he saw who it was he'd slammed into.
"It was my fault." Ivy insisted, brushing herself off.
"No, it was mine." Sam argued.
At the same time they both say, "I wasn't paying attention to where I was going."
Ivy gave in, smiling, "If it will make you feel better, alright, it's all your fault."
Sam laughed, "Thank you. So, what are you doing here on the beach on such a cold day?"
"This is where I've always come to think. It's something I started years ago, with this boyfriend I had ages ago. We used to come here together, and I've been coming here to think things out ever sense." Ivy explained, alluding to their past relationship.
Sam smiled at the memory, "Ahhh yes, I had a girlfriend who I used to come here with too. Which is why I bought a house on the beach to live in, after I tell my wife I'm leaving her that is."
Ivy's eyes widened in surprise and her heart was in her throat, "Is that so? Hmm, I should have thought of that. Right now, I'm stuck living in a hotel."
"What was so special about this boyfriend that it makes you come here to think?"
Ivy smiled, her heart revealing itself, "He was the love of my life. The only man I ever loved, and the only person who ever cared about me, before my children. I wanted to marry him some day . . . . He was so handsome too. Athletic build, great hair, and when he smiled at me, my heart just skipped a beat." She grinned coyly, then turned it onto Sam, "What about you, what was so special about that girlfriend of yours?"
"Oh she was the most beautiful girl I'd ever seen. Her blond hair was so long and soft. And she had this way of looking at me, so adoringly, loving me completely. I loved her with every fiber of my being."
The sexual tension in the air is at a maximum high, Sam looked down at Ivy, who unconsciously took a step closer to him, looking up at him, and she licked her lips.
That was the breaking point for Sam, he pulled her close to him and kissed her with everything he had in him. Ivy responded passionately. Both had been holding this back for years, and they couldn't take it anymore.
Sam swept her off her feet, literally, and then rushed her up to his new house. He some how opened the door and kicked it closed behind him. He carried up the stairs, into the master bedroom.
They kissed and tore at each other's clothes wildly. Ivy legs wrapped around Sam's waist, bringing him closer to her as they kissed. Shirts were thrown in unknown corners, pants pulled off . . .
Kissing each other all over their bodies, not able to get enough of each other.
Wild, animal lust, and love ruled their bodies and they made passionate love long into the night.
It was late at night when, both lay there panting, Ivy lying on Sam's chest, muttering to herself.
Sam kissed the top of her head, "Is something wrong?"
"I don't know how to tell you . . . it's just that . . . I've wanted to tell you this for so many years"
"What Ivy?" Sam questioned.
Ivy continued, not even hearing him, "But my father said he'd kill you both if I did."
"WHAT?!"
Ivy rambled on, "Even after he died, I couldn't tell you. It was so complicated by then, and as the years went on, it just got harder and harder to say . . . even though he threatened you I mean. I thought you wouldn't understand. That you couldn't understand." Ivy prattled.
"What did you want to tell me that your father would kill me and whomever for?" Sam asked scared, somehow sensing what her answer most likely would be.
"That I was pregnant all those years ago when you left me." Ivy finally got out, and then said more softly, "That Ethan really is your son."
~*~
b** Luis and IKay's/I apartment **/b
Hank moved the last of Ihis/I boxes into his Jeep, and Kay's were sitting in the living room. He said his good-byes, then drove off, to Sheridan's.
Now Luis and Kay stood in the middle of the empty bedroom, opening cans of golden yellow paint. The windows open to make all the paint fumes leave the apartment.
They turned on the radio and got to work. They were on the third wall, when a song came on, that obviously effected Kay.
~*~*~*~*~*~
I I'm only pretty sure that I can't take anymore
Before you take a swing
I wonder
What are we fighting for?
When I say outsold
I want to get out of this
I wonder as there anything
I'm going to miss /I
~*~*~*~*~*~
Kay pretended that she didn't hear the song, and kept painting the wall
She used to play the song all the time, and it had been one of her favorites. But now it just seemed to tell all what was wrong between her and Miguel, except that she Idid/I care.
~*~*~*~*~*~
II wonder how it's going to be
When you don't know me
How's it going to be
When you're sure I'm not there
How's it going to be
When there's no one there to talk to
Between you and me
Cause I don't care
How's it going to be
How's it going to be /I
~*~*~*~*~*~
Luis noticed the guarded look on Kay's face, and silently watched her as he painted, keeping a close eye on his new roommate. He really didn't understand how people could believe she was so strong, when it was so obvious she needed people so much if anyone actually took the time to look.
~*~*~*~*~*~
IWhere we used to laugh
There's a shouting match
Sharp as a thumbnail scratch
A silence I can't ignore
Like the hammock by the
Doorway we spent time in swings empty
Don't see lightning like last fall
When it was always about to hit me /I
~*~*~*~*~*~
He was truly seeing Kay for what she really was for the first time in his life, a deeply hurting, confused, frail girl, who needed to be loved, more then anybody had ever noticed.
Luis had never wanted to kick his brother's ass more then he did right at that moment.
~*~*~*~*~*~
I I wonder how's it going to be
When it goes down
How's it going to be
When you're not around
How's it going to be
When you found out there was nothing
Between you and me /I
~*~*~*~*~*~
Kay kept pretending the song wasn't getting to her, she had to stay strong. People had to believe that she was as tough as the outward appearance she gave off.
She couldn't allow herself to be weak, that's what people prey on. Your weaknesses, and if they couldn't see them, they couldn't hurt her anymore.
~*~*~*~*~*~
ICause I don't care
How's it going to be
And how's it going to be
When you don't know me anymore
And how's it going to be /I
~*~*~*~*~*~
But Kay finally crumbled, she couldn't hold it in anymore. Her knees gave out, and she sunk to the floor, tears running down her face as she mourned.
Luis rushed to her held her, and let her cry on someone's shoulder for once.
~*~*~*~*~*~
IWant to get myself back in again
The soft dive of oblivion
I want to taste the salt of your skin
The soft dive of oblivion oblivion
How's it going to be
When you don't know me anymore
How's it going to be
How's it going to be
How's it going to be /I
~*~*~*~*~*~
She cried for the things that she'd lost, her home, her family. She cried for the ache in her heart that Miguel had caused. Kay cried for the loneliness, and the pain it caused in her soul when she saw Miguel with Charity, or all those times she'd heard him tell Charity 'I love you'. She cried for the girl that she used to be, who had slowly and agonizingly, died in the past year. She cried for many things.
Luis could practically feel the pain radiating off her. He held her close in his strong arms, hoping she would take hold of some of his strength or at least know that he was here for her, rocking her back and forth.
Slowly, her sobs abated, but they both still sat there; Kay taking solace in Luis caring, and Luis still desperately wanting to help her, but guiltily enjoying the feeling of her in his arms
Luis prayed the crying had helped wash the pain from her heart, and wasn't a sign that she was even more unhappy. He listened to her breathing grow deep and even as he still rocked, and felt her body relax.
He knew she'd fallen asleep, so he carried her back into his room, laid her on to his bed, then covered her. He watched her sleep for awhile, then went and finished painting the room. He set up a few fans, one focussed on each wall, the closed the windows until they were only opened a crack and put on the window safety, so they'd be open, but no one could climb the fire escape and enter the second floor apartment.
At long last, he settled himself for another long night on the couch.
~*~
b** Still in bed at Sam's new house on the beach **/b
"But you said that . . ."
"I know what I said Sam," Ivy burst out, then sighed resignedly, "I was scared. Scared of Julian, scared of Alistair. Scared of losing the only things I had left after losing everything that was important to me. But I'm finally out of their clutches. And since then I've been trying to figure out a way to tell you, that not only do we have a son. But that you're going to be a Grandfather too."
"Could you repeat that?" Sam requested dumfounded.
Ivy smiled, "Theresa's three months pregnant. Apparently, they had a lot of fun on that honeymoon, and they left so quickly, they forgot Theresa's birth-control . . . . Are you angry with me?" she questioned fearfully.
"Are you kidding?! Hell no! I just found out the woman I love and I had a son together! And he's going to become a father!" He hugged her tightly, reassuring her.
Ivy sighed the biggest sigh of relief in her life, "I was frightened you would hate me."
"I wasted too many years being mad at you, and hating you. I will never, ever, make that mistake again." He vowed.
Sam kissed her to seal his promise and made love to her again.
b** A bit later **/b
"How did you get Julian to divorce you?" Sam questioned Ivy suddenly, as they lay there.
"It was simple actually, blackmail. I just used a picture of him in bed with some whore, and had the girl, changed into a guy, by brilliant son John, who is a photographer and knows his way around a computer. I knew Julian would never tell anyone, because the Crane's don't need anymore scandal after Ethan left Gwen at the alter and ran off with, as Rebecca Hotchkiss would say, the housekeeper's trollop daughter." Ivy told him honestly, laughing.
"What will they do when they find out about Ethan?"
"Nothing, just try to keep it quiet. They can't because Ethan's wife is a pregnant fashion designer who just hit it big, his real father is a police chief. And no matter what 'pull' they have with the mayor, as an ex-governor's daughter, I have more." Ivy told him smugly.
"Does anyone else know that Ethan's my son?"
"Only Pilar, and she has all the proof in an attaché case at her house. I couldn't leave it where Julian might find it. It has documents that prove you are the father." Ivy told him, yawning.
Eventually, Ivy feel asleep, exhausted from the emotional, and physical events of the previous day. While Sam stayed up a bit longer, thinking of what Ivy had told him, absentmindedly playing with her hair.
b** Around midnight **/b
Sam reluctantly slipped his arm out from Ivy and got dressed. He had to get home, no matter how much he wanted to stay. He quickly dressed, and wrote a note to Ivy, apologizing for leaving while she was asleep. And telling that, he loved her.
He left the note on the nightstand, then closed and locked the door behind him, and reluctantly drove home to his 'loving' wife.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Please, I want replies, I know it sounds pathetic, but I live for feedback, good or bad! I need to know what you think so I know where to go with this.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~