Main Characters: (will change chapter to chapter)
-Kevin Kelly (Bailiff)
-The Rock (Judge)
-Angle (?)
-X-Pac (The Lost Loser)
-Jeff Hardy (Official Prankster)
-Undertaker (Random Appearance Guy)
Disclaimer: These things are pointless, just like this chapter. I don't own anyone, nor do I own the WWE (if I did, Taker would have won the Triple Threat Match, and the APA would be able to go freely between both shows). I don't own the Peoples Court. The Peoples Court is actually the WORST court TV show. But, Most importantly, read with caution author is NOT responsible for lemming like activity, i.e. Jumping off cliffs or bridges, or/and insanity either permanent or temporary. Now that I've finished with that bullshit, onto the real story.
Summary: Written hours after Vengeance PPV, and if you haven't noticed I'm not a happy camper with most of the results. Nor am I that happy with the Rock at the moment. This is really short; the next chapter will be better with it being Kurt Angle suing X-Pac. I apologize for this chapter
Rating: PG-13, too short for any other rating. Slight language.
PLEASE READ AND REVIEW!!Kevin: (walks into the court room, is holding and looking at a newspaper circling things) Everybody rise, the People's Judge is about to enter the courtroom. (Hears no response, no unseen crowd, looks up) What the hell? Where's X-Pac and Angle? (The Rock enters)
Rock: Kevin Kelly you should be happy those less-than qualified sports entertainers aren't in your presence yet.
Kevin: I'm happy that I don't have to look at either of those dumbasses, but really, I'm pretty much out of work as that good for nothing hermaphrodite Marc Lloyd stole my job.
Rock: Don't you produce Confidential?
Kevin: Yeah, but I like interview all the dumb wrestlers. Plus, I would have gotten paid twice as much working for both shows.
Rock: Announcers always want more money.
Kevin: Look who's talking Mr. I'll-Ditch-My-Job-To-Make-More-Money.
Rock: Yes, but I work for my money. I'm in the ring, damaging my health for the people.
Kevin: Dude, I take all the wrestlers shit all day long, if they fell the need to complain I have to be right there waiting for them, not only that but I have to listen to you guys. You guys are a pain in my ass.
Rock: How are you suggesting we fix this problem?
Kevin: By you shutting the hell up.
Rock: Excuse me?
Kevin: Ah, shut up. Where the hell is Angle and X-Pac? I need to find an extra job. Maybe I'll be a currier. (starts looking through the newspaper relentlessly)
Author: Yoink! ( © soxzZz, The Author steals the Paper) You can't get a new job. Find a way to get rid of Marc Lloyd. Nobody likes him. (disappears)
Rock: That was odd.
Kevin: Apparently the fans like me.
R.U.C.: (Random Unseen Crowd) Kevin Kelly Is God.
Rock: What about the Rock?
R.U.C.: The Rock is trying to be Raven.
Rock: That's not nice. (Random laughter, Rock looks around suspiciously) What the….
R.U.C.: This Author sucks!
Author: Hey! Who let you in my story? Get the Hell Out!
R.U.C.: But, but, Kevin Kelly is God?
Author: OUT!
R.U.C.: Bread is God.
Author: Fine you can stay (gives the R.U.C. some bread) Just stop making fun of me, I get enough crap from the reviewers who apparently want me in jail for some reason. I don't need my Crowd muses trying to kill me too.
R.U.C.: BREADDDDDDDDDDDDD!
Rock: Is this madness over?
Author: ….Yes…..
Rock: Good. Have you found Angle or X-Pac yet?
Kevin: Nope.
Rock: Where's my belt?
Kevin: What belt?
Rock: The one I won tonight. The Undisputed Champion belt.
Kevin: That's in your chambers.
Rock: Well, go get it, I want to rub it in Angles face.
Kevin: I still think Taker should have kept his title. You're leaving in four or five weeks anyway.
Rock: GET ME MY BELT YOU HERMAPHODITE! (Kevin Kelly walks away mumbling bad comments about the Rock, comes back with the belt in one hand and a tape recorder in the other) Why do you have a tape recorder?
Kevin: (hands him the belt) There is your belt. This is me pretending to give a damn. (Presses play on the tape recorder, it is Kevin Kelly saying various things to the Rock but mainly, the words "Yes" "I guess so" are played. Then as the tape continues you can slightly hear "I'll get my revenge")
Rock: That's not nice Kevin Kelly! (Kevin Kelly flips him off and walks out of the room) Hey! You have to be in here for when Angle and X-Pac arrive. (Silence) Hello? The Rock doesn't like this. (X-Pac walks in)
X-Pac: Sorry I'm late, I got lost on the way down the hall.
Rock: This is the only door down this hall.
X-Pac: I thought Big Show was playing a joke on me.
Rock: You're an idiot. Bailiff! One of the people on trial or whatever has arrived.
Kevin: Kiss my assssss Rocky!
Rock: Where's Angle?
X-Pac: Last time I saw him he was crying over losing his milk.
Rock: You mean (holds up the title) this?
X-Pac: No, I mean milk. Somebody keeps stealing his milk. (Jeff Hardy comes running in)
Jeff: What the hell is this place?
Rock: The People's Court.
Jeff: Hey Rock you hate Angle right?
Rock: I can't be biased against the court people.
Jeff: What?
Kevin: (walks out) He can't be biased against the litigants.
Jeff: Oh. Can you?
Kevin: Hell yeah! Why?
Jeff: Good. I'll be right back. (Leaves the room, everyone just stares in confusion, Jeff is wheeling in a lot of milk bottles) Help me hide these, the bitch has been on my tail for a week or two now.
Kevin: That shit smells horrible. Have you been putting it in a refrigerator?
Jeff: I knew I forgot something.
Rock: Get that shit out of the People's courtroom!
Kevin: No, leave it I have an idea. (walks over and puts it next to the Plaintiffs podium) Angle will walk in, see it, and drink it. Hardy, help me move all of the expired ones to the top. (Everyone looks at Kevin kind of worried) Oh come on! This guy always gave me shit! Not only that, but wouldn't you LOVE to see him wallow around sick? (They all think, then nod in agreement.) X-Pac, go stand by the door and tell us when Angle's coming. (X-Pac walks to the door, Jeff and Kevin starting re-arranging the milk.)
Rock: Remind me not to get on your bad side.
Kevin: Oh you are BEYOND the point of return.
Rock: Shit.
Kevin: Don't worry I won't be that mean to you. (Laughs demonically)
Rock: I think I'm scared of him.
Jeff: Hey, Kevin, I haven't done anything mean to you right?
Kevin: Nope.
Jeff: Good.
X-Pac: Someone's coming. (Moves out of the way of the door, walks to his podium, Taker walks in)
Rock: How you could you NOT tell the difference between Angle and Taker? Angle's bald, Takers not. (Kevin and Jeff go back to re-arranging the milk)
Taker: What the hell are Hardy and Kevin doing?
Jeff: (looks at Kevin) We should get revenge on Taker.
Kevin: I'm not that stupid. Angle wouldn't suspect me, and the Rock really deserves it.
Jeff: Point taken.
Rock: Why are you in the People's Court?
Taker: I want my belt back.
Rock: No. Bailiff, show this man out of my court please. (Kevin looks at Taker)
Kevin: (Laughs) You're on your own Rocky.
Rock: Damn. (Taker walks up steals the belt, starts to walk back, but then grabs some milk)
Kevin: Undertaker (looks scared as Taker might actually drink it.) That is expired.
Taker: Trying to poison Kurt?
Kevin: Pretty much.
Taker: More power to ya. (Throws the milk at the Rock) If you two ever need any help, you can come to me…I might need you to pull pranks or something without me actually getting involved. (Leaves)
Kevin: (Kevin looks at Jeff) We should take him up on that some day.
Jeff: He reminds me of the mafia.
Kevin: Yea, me too. (Turns to Rock) Damn Rock, you smell like shit.
Rock: He took my belt.
Kevin: You should have never won it anyway.
X-Pac: Shit! Kurt's coming! I'm not lying this time! (He runs up to his podium, Jeff and Kevin walk to the Bailiffs corner place, seconds later, Angle walks in)
Angle: Sorry I'm late. Somebody stole my milk!
Rock: We heard.
Angle: (Screams) MILKKKKK!! (starts guzzling down the milk)
Rock: Let's get started, shall we?
Angle: Wait! Let me drink some milk!
Rock: Fine! Kevin Kelly, get me a phone. I have to call somebody about Taker coming into the People's Court and stealing my belt!
Kevin: No.
Rock: Why not?
Kevin: Too much work.
Rock: It's your job.
Kevin: Can I quit?
Rock: Nope.
Kevin: Get it yourself.
Angle: Taker stole your belt? When did this happen? Why wasn't I given a chance in the match?
Kevin: It wasn't a match. Taker just walked in and stole it.
Angle: (disgusted) You let him get away with that Rock?
Kevin: He didn't move an inch.
Angle: I knew you wouldn't be able to defend that title!
Kevin: Dude, he didn't lose it in a match. He'll get it back soon enough.
Angle: He doesn't deserve it---ugh, I don't feel well. (drops to the floor, rolls around in my pain) I want my mommmmmmmmmieee!!
Rock: I guess we will have to post pone this damned thing.
X-Pac: Sweeeeeeeeet. (he leaves)
Rock: Hardy, Kevin, my chambers please.
Jeff: Do you mean that in a gay way?
Rock: Nope.
Jeff: You sure?
Rock: (thinks) Um……..yes. (They all go to chambers) Shut the door. (Kevin Kelly shuts the door, the Rock hands them each a $50) That's for the Angle thing. Amuse me like that during proceedings and you might make more money.
Jeff: (talking to Kevin) Usually I get beat up for pranks. I like getting paid for them. (They both walk out; Taker and Angle walk into the Judges Chambers)
Taker: (hits Rock over the head with the belt) Here's your belt. (Has nasty milk in his hand and throws it at Rock again)
Angle: Hey! That milk is still good!
Taker: No it's not, it expired last month.
Angle: Really?
Taker: Yes. (Picks up a chair throws it at Rock, choke slams Angle) Idiot. (Leaves, Rock and Angle twitch on the ground)
The EndNext: Will Kurt Angle still be sick from the Expired Milk? Will he continue to drink it even though he knows it expired?
Angle: It's still good milk! Really!
Does that thought disturb anyone else? Will Jeff and Kevin team up to reek havoc at the Rock's expense?
Kevin: Oh hell ya! Nothing like taking money from a guy who doesn't stop calling you a hermaphrodite!
Will the Rock stop calling Kevin Kelly a hermaphrodite? Will the mystery of who sucks more X-Pac or Angle FINALLY be solved?
Author: Yes, yes it will. And more people will appear randomly. Sorry this was much longer than I expected it to be. It also didn't come out how I planned. Where's my superhero chauffer? I never found my bobble head store.
Al Snow: Need a ride to a comic book store?
Author: You ARE so not a superhero.
Al Snow: There is only one superhero in the WWE, and he chaffered you last "episode"
Author: So?
Al Snow: I'm bored. I'll take you to find a bobble head store.
Author: Fine, under one condition.
Al Snow: What?
Author: REPLACE MAVEN WITH JOSHHHHHHHHH! (Al Snow screeches and Runs away) Josh was hot.. I hate maven. (disappears to bobble head land)
IT IS REALLY THE END NOW.
Real Chapter to Be up Soon
This Chapter was my revenge against the Rock for winning the title at Vengeance, stupid bitch. I apologize. again.