PEOPLE'S COURT
Main Characters:
-Kevin Kelly (If you don't know his role by now, finda cliff and jump, but read my disclaimer first)
-The Rock (see above comment)
-Kane (Fluffah and current tag team champion)
-Veronica (Rabbit/President of the Dead Rat Society…you'll find out later)
-Matt Hardy (only other member of the DRS)
-Dani (Bubba's wife, and owner of many harems)
-Bubba (see above)
-Author (nothing special, I just wanted my name on the list)
-Smokey (a mo0o boo be ha ho0o)
-Hurricane (Hurri-tag team champion)
-Emily (Plaintiff)
-X-Pac (oops, I mean Syxx-Pac ::snicker snicker:: um, he's the Defendant)
-Christian (MY hero)
-Kevin Nash, Scott Hall, Raven (racers)
-RVD (not allowed to touch Smokey)
Disclaimer: Sorry kiddies, this one is gonna be a short one. Um, its not a WWE person vs. A WWE person. I had to get this story out of the way so I don't get killed. Vince owns all. I promise a real chapter soon. Wait, no I don't. I'm currently writing a slasher that has contained all thought. So, no real idea on when a real chapter will be up. Author is not responsible for moronic activity (i.e. jumping off cliffs) and/or causing of insanity. Prepare for randomity.
Kevin: Dammit! I thought we
got rid of you Sean!
Syxx-Pac: I go by Syxx-Pac now.
Kevin: (sarcastically) Oh how original!
Syxx-Pac: Shut up! Can I get this over with?
Emily: Make this divorce final or die.
Rock: Did I miss anything? (Emily gives Rock the Rock Bottom.)
Emily: Doooooooo itttttt!
Rock: Pain…do what the crazy lady says hermie!
Kevin: Ok, under the grounds that no one should be tortured by Sean Waltman aka Syxx-Pac aka X-Pac aka a worthless piece of monkeyshit, you two are OFFICIALLY divorced.
Jason Mewes: OFFICIALLY! (go watch the animated version of clerks you assclowns)
Author: Sweeeeeeeeet! (runs away with Jason Mewes)
Jason: Help…me…
Veronica: I must find who freed Jeff hardy!! Author, come back! You made me give Jericho to the Pyper lady. Now, I want to collect and get Jeff Hardy!!
Author: Shit, I promised that didn't I?
Veronica: Yes, you did.
Author: Damn my promises. (gets hit by a golf-cart) Ouch! (the golf-cart stops)
Scott: Sorry about that Leah.
Author: It's ok. But, only because your Scott Hall. Now, get me away from the crazy rat.
Dani: (with Bubba, pointing at Veronica) You look like a dead rat!
Veronica: You're mean.
Matt: You are very mean.
Bubba: You look like a dead rat too!
Matt: Mean
Veronica: Evil.
Rock: this case is over already? (Kane comes in, beats the shit out of Rock, steals his wallet)
Kane: Finally! We got paid for that stupid prank.
Hurricane: Good job tag team buddy Kane!
Author: (slightly out of the court room) Wait! Scott Hall, drive me back. (drives back, picks up the hurricane) goooooooo heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeelllllllll!!!!!!!! Go heel! Go heel dammit!
Hurricane: I can't.
Author: You and Christian create a evil superhero league. (gets choke slammed by Kane, twitches)
Scott: That sucks. (Smokey, my only friend, runs over to help me.)
Smokey: ah sie so0o ba bo0oo0o?
Hurricane: Don't worry Smokey, she'll be ok!
Kane: What the hell is that?
Veronica: Is it a dead rat?
Matt: It can join our society!
Hurricane: It's Citizen Leah also known as Citizen Author's pray-fish. It's part dragon, part prairie dog. I babysat it, so I'm fluent in its language.
Smokey: wahy lolojhuum a sei ei godoodd?
Hurricane: Well, Citizen Smokey, your owner suggested that I go evil. And Kane, (points to Kane) my tag team buddy didn't like the idea.
Smokey: (runs up to Kane) wlaodgagha ko0loolol as ssiiiiee??????
Kane: ……
Hurricane: He wants to know if Leah will be ok.
Kane: ……
Hurricane: Just say yes, he doesn't believe me.
Kane: ……
Hurricane: Kane! Now is NO time to go Silent.
Kane: She'll be fine. You are a cute little creature. (Kane picks up Smokey. Smokey bites him, he drops Smokey and screams) It bit me!!
Hurricane: What did you expect? (Smokey runs up to the Hurricane and gives him a hug)
Rob: IS that Smokey?!?! (Smokey runs towards Rob. Author magically wakes up)
Author: Oh no you don't Rob. Get the HELL away from Smokey.
Rob: Ah, it is! I missed you little buddy.
Author: Smokey, get over here now!
Smokey: Aho0oo0o Rob.
Author: NO!
Rob: Ah, come on, let me give it a hug.
Author: I still remember what happened last time you watched Smokey.
Rob: I'm sorry I broke tradition and whatever but I love this lil' guy.
Author: Stay away. (Gets hit by a Shopping cart)
Veronica: That's for even thinking of making the person who freed Jeff be HHH.
Author: Bitch. Now, I will get revenge. You see little kiddie, I will make Jeff suffer the worst thing possible. Jeff is HHH's sex slave. Ha!
Veronica: Nooooooo! (Jeff comes out and Swanton Bombs Veronica, she twitches) twitch.
Author: Who's laughing now? (Jeff Hardy tries to clothesline the Author but Kane and Smokey save her) Thanks Kane. (she kicks Jeff hardy who is twitching next to Veronica)
HHH: I'm here to pick up my prize?
Author: You get the dead rat and the drug addict. (Raven comes in)
Raven: Actually, you said the person who freed Jeff Hardy gets both Jeff and the dead rat—err I mean Veronica. (You hear constant bitching progressing louder in the background)
Author: Fine, you can HHH too.
HHH: What??
Raven: I don't want him!
Author: Well, dispose of him somehow will ya? He's ruining my inspiration. (Emily hits Leah over the head with a Stop Sign. Smokey lights Emily on fire.) Now, now, Emily play nice. Smokey, that goes for you too. Dammit Rob! I see you creeping towards Smokey, GET OUT! (Rob gets carried out) Emily if you promise to play nice I'll abduct Edge for you or something. (Rosy and Jamal enter)
Jamal: We came to pick up a prize?
Smokey: ROSEEEEEEEEEEEEEYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!
Rosy: How does that creature know my name??
Author: Actually, I don't have a prize for you. I just wanted you to be my friends.
Rosy: Can I play with the creature?
Author: Smokey? Yea, he loves you because your name rhymes with his. (Rosy picks up Smokey and the Island Boys start to leave) Oh, one rule. Smokey is not allowed to go NEAR Rob Van Dam. Take the Hurricane with you (whispers) turn him heel (back to normal voice) he can translate everything Smokey says. (All of them leave, the Author gets hit by yet another golf cart) DAMMIT!
Scott: Sorry about that. I was racing Ke---
Author: Don't finish that name.
Scott: Ok. (Author gets hit by Kevin Nash who is in an electric wheelchair.)
Author: You know, I get you into my story, I be nice to you guys and all of you just beat me up!
Scott: It was an accident!! (Veronica and Jeff steal Scott's Golf Cart while Raven gets in the shopping cart. They all line up in the court room)
Author: oh no.
Scott: My Golf-cart!
Veronica: Wanna Race Big Sexy?
Kevin Nash: You're on! (they race out of the court room)
Scott: Wait! I wanna race tooooooooooo!! (a motorized Barbie car falls next to him) Funny! (he climbs in and races after them) hahahha I'm gonna winnnnnnnn!! (Undertaker randomly appears, with his Motorcycle and joins the race too.)
Author: I need some ice.
Bubba: I'm mad at you.
Dani: I'm sorry.
Bubba: You put me on the injured list, you didn't watch me in my big title match-up, you didn't come to visit me in the hospital, and you still own your harems.
Dani: I'm sorry Bubba. I truly am. I love youuuuuu! Bubbaaaaaa!!!!!!! (Bubba walks away pissed off)
Author: Dude, I'm so not writing another divorce chapter. (Dani gets out a table)
Dani: Bubba! This is your job! (Bubba comes back)
Bubba: BUBBA! GET THE TABLES!
Dani: Time to eat wood! (Author gets thrown threw a table)
Author: Twitch. (Christian enters)
Christian: That so totally reeks the bowels of suckitude.
Author: Help..me… (Christian helps the Author up and then carries her out of the court room.)
Christian: Where's the Superhero?
Author: Watching Smokey.
Christian: SMOKEYS BACK?!?!? Dude, I'm gonna find Smokey. (Drops the Author)
Author: Did I mention that Smokey is with Rosy and Jamal. (Christian picks the author back up)
Christian: Sorry about that.
Author: I'll let you play with Smokey all day tomorrow.
Christian: Cool. (Author and Christian leave, going back to God knows where. Emily gets "married" to edge, but we'll work that out next chapter)
The end
Who won the Race? What's going to happen with Bubba and Dani?
Why is Matt a dead rat?
Why did Raven free Druggie Hardy?
Why is Smokey not allowed to go NEAR RVD?
Why are Jamal and Rosy so damn cool?
Why hasn't anyone killed Bischoff and HHH yet?
Why won't the hurricane go heel?
WHY DID CHRISTIAN SAVE THE AUTHOR?!?!
Alright, that's all. Sorry it's so bad, but I have a lot of things to do and I just wanted to rush a chapter. Smokey is ok, RVD didn't meet up with him. (thank god!) I'm a huge Rosy and Jamal mark if you haven't noticed. Muwhahhahahaz. Sorry if you hate Rosy and Jamal, but I love them. The next chapter will be better (hopefully). You had to love the trend of me getting my ass kicked, I think I owe to you guys for putting up such a stupid chapter. Plus, I feel like I got hit by a train so I might as well show that in my stories right?!?
Well, I'm out of here, please Review. Hope you guys liked it
-Leah, her counter-part Bob the Stop Sign, and Smokey.