Sorry it's been so long between updates, I've been really busy with moving to Austria for a year to study, so I haven't had a lot of time to write and almost no opportunities to go online. Worse, I'll not be able to watch Big Wolf again until December! Anyway, enough with excuses, here it is finally, enjoy. Reviews are, as always, very appreciated.
After school the next day, Merton found himself flicking hopelessly through a book he had read ten times before, searching in vain for something that could help him figure out what was happening to Tommy. He could find nothing on possession by past and future versions of yourself, either this was the first time it had happened, it had never been written about before or something else was wrong. None of these possibilities helped Tommy however, and he was willing to keep searching until he found something that did.
It was true that they hadn't seen any signs of other Tommys for almost a day, and he was tempted to that that as a good sign and have a rest, after all he had been reading for three straight hours and found nothing, but even if Tommy was better, and he doubted it could be that easy, there was still the small matter of his own impending death to consider. He was torn between hoping Tommy was better and wanting the chance to talk to future Tommy again and ask him what was going to happen. Merton had never been the type of person to be called selfish by anyone, but he really did hope he would get another chance to speak to future Tommy. He consoled himself with the idea that the past and future personalities might be irritating but they didn't actually hurt Tommy. His best friend would probably, hopefully, rather put up with them for a little longer than see Merton die.
Whatever Tommy's opinion on the subject however, it seemed he didn't have a lot of choice. When the door to the lair opened and Merton saw Tommy standing there, he knew immediately that it wasn't his Tommy. It was something in his eyes, he had noticed it the first time he had met future Tommy. A look of disbelief at what was happening, but not in the same way that past Tommy had worn his own look of disbelief, showing horror at his situation and wishing that he could go back to his normal life as quickly as possible. Future Tommy wore a look of wonder, the look of someone who couldn't believe what was happening, yes, but in a good way. Future Tommy had a second chance and Merton could see it in his eyes.
"Merton," he said, stepping inside and shutting the door behind him.
Merton smiled, unable temporarily to believe his own good luck, "I knew you'd come back," he said, "you have to help me, tell me what's going to happen to me. It's been driving me mad knowing something terrible's going to happen and not being able to do anything about it."
Future Tommy's expression changed to a look of sympathy, "I know," he said, "I remember seeing what this was doing to you when I was your Tommy. I didn't want to leave you like that, I didn't ever want to leave you, but I had to see my family. You don't know what it's been like for me, Merton."
That was true, he had no idea what would happen to Tommy or anyone else he knew in the future. It must have been hard enough for him to lose his best friend, but now it looked like something happened to his family, or at least happened to drive a wedge between them. He remained silent, not sure of what he could say, waiting for Tommy to go on.
"Now I need to see you," Tommy told him, "I need to save you,"
"What's going to happen to me?" pleaded Merton
"Nothing, I'm going to do everything I can to save you. I think that's why this happened, so you don't have to die. As long as I keep going backwards in time I always have a chance to save you and this time it's going to work."
"This time? What do you mean?"
"When I was your Tommy, everything that's happening to him now happened to me. A future version of myself told you that you were going to die and tried to save you, but it didn't work. This time it will." Merton nodded, trying to hide his uncertainty. Knowing that an attempt to save him had failed before didn't improve his confidence, but they had to try. Despite any uncertainties he had about the possibility of changing the past, was willing to try anything. "What do we have to do?" he asked.
Tommy sat down before he began and took a deep breath. "I know you don't think this is going to work," he said, "but it will, I know it will. I can change things here, I've already done things slightly differently to last time. We'll be ready for it this time"
"But when is it going to happen, and what is it?"
"Tomorrow night, the Gorath."
Merton gasped. Tomorrow night. He had so little time and so many things he had never had the chance to do. But how could the Gorath do anything to him, Tommy had killed it several days before. That was what had started this whole mess, "That's not possible," he said, " I saw it disintegrate, it couldn't have survived." Could it?
"It didn't survive, it had a mate. She wanted revenge. She's going to come here tomorrow, just before eleven o'clock and take you. In my history I wasn't here, I arrived a few minutes after you'd been taken. It left a trail and I followed it but I was too late, you were dying. I killed it, but it didn't do any good. It had already done what it wanted.
"This time you've got to make sure I'm here to protect you. I've been trying to find out as much as I can about the Gorath for years so I'd be ready to tell you what to do, but all I could find out that I don't think you already know is it's sensitive to bronze. Not as much as silver hurts me, but it'll work better than the weapons I used."
Merton sat open mouthed as he listened to this. Listening to the details of his death was unnerving to say the least, and the idea that a Gorath could think like that was incredible. From what he had read it was basically a solitary, mindless creature that spent its time terrorising innocent people. Of course, it made sense that they would have mates, otherwise there would be no way for them to breed and survive, but the idea that they could understand the concept of revenge gave them a whole new dimension. "But why does it come after me?" he asked, "You were the one that killed it's mate, surely you would be the one it wanted to hurt."
"It did hurt me, more than you can imagine. It decided that since I killed it's mate, it would…" Tommy paused, looking uncomfortable and cleared his throat, "um…it would kill mine."
"That's ridiculous!" gasped Merton jumping out of his chair and knocking his book to the floor as he did, "I mean, it made a mistake. Didn't it?" There was no way anyone could think of he and Tommy as 'mates' not in the way future Tommy seemed to be describing. Well, no one except for past Tommy and a few morons at school, but they didn't count. If Tommy had been telling him all this was going to happen years in the future he might have been able to accept that things were going to happen that he didn't realise yet. Maybe some day in the future, if he survived, he and Tommy might be something more than friends. It wasn't likely, he didn't think about Tommy like that, he liked girls, but he accepted that feelings could change. Especially with everything that had been happening recently he could almost convince himself to believe it, but it would take time. One day wasn't long enough for anything to happen.
"I know what you're thinking," future Tommy told him, "I was thinking exactly the same thing when you explained all this to me. You're going to do that pretty soon by the way, then you'll tell me this: the Gorath knew something we didn't, I think it could smell something on us that gave us away. We weren't even aware of it ourselves then, but the Gorath picked up on it and decided to take revenge on me by killing the person that meant as much to her as her mate."
"If you're saying Tommy and I are secretly in love with each other you're wrong." Merton told him, "To be honest I've been wondering about you, I mean Tommy, my Tommy, for a while now, but I know my own mind."
Tommy shook his head, "No, you don't. You don't even know yourself as well as I did, as your Tommy knows himself now. He's confused, he doesn't know what to think. Part of him is telling him to act on his feelings and the other half is pushing the 'rules' in his face, telling him how much he has to lose if he lets you know, what people might think, what you might think. He doesn't even think you'll feel the same way."
"Well he's right, I don't think about you…I mean Tommy…I mean…You are Tommy…" He broke off into a nervous, high pitched giggle, "What I mean is, I don't like guys, not like that. I'm straight."
"I don't believe you."
Merton glanced up to look future Tommy in the eye but broke eye contact after less than a second, "Why not?" he asked quietly, looking at the floor and fearing the answer to his question.
"Because you made the first move."
Merton shook his head as tears of confusion began to well up in his eyes. Part of him didn't want to believe what he was hearing, but despite what he had been telling himself, it sounded so right that he couldn't bring himself to stop listening. "I can't have done. Tommy's a friend, just a friend." He was talking more to himself than to his friend's future self standing self consciously in front of him
Tommy reached out and put a reassuring hand on the smaller boy's shoulder. Merton flinched in response, "I know how you feel," he said, "I was so confused when you did it, but you helped me figure out a lot of things."
Merton had been fighting the tears that were sitting inside his eyes, blurring his vision, but eventually he couldn't hold them back any longer. A large tear dropped from one of his eyes and ran down his cheek. Tommy reached out and brushed it away with his thumb, gently guiding Merton's face upwards to meet his eyes. "You know it's right," he said, "you can feel it, can't you?"
Merton nodded slowly but not hesitantly and Tommy moved closer, embracing his best friend, his lover. It had been so long, he had missed him so much, more than he had realised. He knew in that moment that he didn't want to live if he couldn't be with Merton, not for one moment without him. Gently, so as not to frighten the boy, he planted a tender kiss on his cheek. He felt Merton's body stiffen in surprise, then relax
Driven by some until now unknown urge, Merton felt his own arms embracing Tommy, feeling the strength in his muscles, running his fingers through his hair, then finally touching his lips to Tommy's. He kissed him, cautiously at first, then harder, exploring every part of his mouth with his tongue, trying desperately to touch every part of Tommy's body, wanting to find out everything he had been missing in all the time he had been lying to himself. The moment could have lasted a few seconds or an eternity, Merton couldn't tell, all he knew was Tommy. Tommy's chest, Tommy's eyes, Tommy's mouth. For that moment the only thing in his world was Tommy, until, to his disappointment Tommy pulled back.
"There'll be time for this later," he said breathlessly, running a finger down Merton's chest, Merton realising as he did that they were both half undressed. He didn't even remember that happening. "I have to go," Tommy told him.
Merton nodded, "But what do we do now?" he asked.
Future Tommy smiled, "I think I've done my part, just remember everything I told you." he said, "I'm leaving now, going back to my time, and when I do, you'll be there waiting for me." He didn't finish the sentence with the 'I hope' that Merton could see in his eyes.
Merton nodded again, "I will be there, I promise." he told him. Tommy bushed a finger against Merton's pale cheek once again, only this time there were no tears to wipe away, the tears were in his own eyes.
Merton quickly re-buttoned his shirt and looked in the mirror, seeing to his relief that his spiked hair still looked as it had done. He didn't want to have to explain to present Tommy what had happened to him, not yet. Future Tommy pulled the T-shirt back on that he had discarded on the floor, and gave Merton one last, longing look.
Then, in an instant Merton knew he was gone, replaced by his younger, present self who wore a look of confusion. "Merton? What's going on? I was at home a second ago."
Merton sighed, not sure what to say first. "It was your future self again, we had a long talk, it was fairly…enlightening."
Tommy, of course, didn't grasp the double meaning in Merton's words. "He told you how to save yourself?" Merton nodded. "That's great! What do we need to do?"
Tommy listened attentively as Merton told him about the Gorath's mate and what was going to happen, missing out future Tommy's explanation of why Merton was the one taken, but Tommy was no idiot, he could tell that he wasn't hearing the whole story, "What are you missing out, Merton?" he asked.
Merton shook his head and answered, "Nothing," a little too quickly.
"Well why does the Gorath want you dead? I'm the one that killed its mate."
"Um…don't know. He never said."
Tommy frowned at his friend but reminded himself that Merton would never not tell him something important, especially if it had something to do with saving his own life. The important thing was that they had a way to save Merton, once that was done Tommy would be able to grill him on all the little details of his conversations with his past and future selves to his heart's content. "So you're absolutely sure you're safe for tonight?" He asked
Merton noted the concern in Tommy's voice. He knew that if he asked him to, his best friend would stay the night with him without hesitation. In fact if he gave any sign of worry Tommy might offer to stay himself. As good as that sounded, Merton wasn't sure how well he would cope with Tommy spending the night. This was the same Tommy that had only minutes before kissed him with more passion that he had ever know in his life. he wanted to be kissed like that again and he didn't want to accidentally frighten Tommy. He would explain that part of his conversation later, when he was ready, though he got the feeling that for the timeline to function properly he would have to tell Tommy before he was due to fight the Gorath in case anything went wrong. Otherwise he might die with Tommy never knowing how he felt and when Tommy got his own chance to travel back in time and try again, he wouldn't know why Merton was the Gorath's target. "I'm absolutely sure." He said definitely.
"I'll stay here tonight if you want, just in case."
Please stop tempting me. Merton shook his head, "No, I'll be fine, really."
"Okay, if you're sure…" Tommy waited, giving Merton the chance to change his mind. The Goth thought he saw disappointment flicker across his friends face but stood his ground. "I'll see you tomorrow then." Tommy turned and left quickly, leaving Merton staring at the closing door. Merton sighed to himself and hoped he had made the right decision. If Tommy had stayed it would have given him the perfect opportunity to talk, and there was always a chance, no matter how small, that future Tommy had mistook the date and the Gorath would take him as he slept. The idea kept him awake well into the night.
Tommy wolfed out and began to run as soon as he was out of sight. He had so much wanted Merton to ask him to stay. He knew nothing would happen, that Merton just didn't feel the same way about him as he was beginning to think he felt, but every opportunity to spend time with Merton was important now because if what his future self had said was true, he might not have many more opportunities.
Ever since the idea had popped uninvited into his mind, the thought of him and Merton had become more and more appealing. Part of him just wanted the feelings to go away or refused to believe that they existed but the rest of him just wanted to see what would happen. The only thing that all of his mind seemed to agree on was that Merton had to be saved. There was no way he would be able to live with himself if anything happened to his best friend. Surely Merton realised that. Tommy wanted to protect him and it hurt that Merton had refused him.