Disclaimer: Paramount's. Not mine. Never was, never will be.
RESTORATION By Kayryn Shadow
"Come in."
The light from the corridor lit the darkened quarters for a moment, before the doors closed again. Knowing who it was, Kathryn didn't even bother to turn around, but kept starting the passing stars.
Seconds stretched into minutes, but neither spoke a word. Finally, she could hear his footsteps as he came a little closer. Kathryn thought that the distance between them felt vast, even though she knew he was only a few feet away.
For the past two hours she'd been pacing her quarters, occasionally stopping to stare at a photograph, a PADD or the stars. The events of the last few days kept tormenting her even though she knew the ordeal was over and life back to normal. Or at least back to the Delta Quadrant version of normal.
Kathryn shivered as she thought of how only one obsessed man in the Alpha Quadrant had been able to danger the safety of her ship and crew. The idea of a Maquis mutiny hadn't even crossed her thoughts in years, so when Chakotay had appeared in front of her, announcing that *he* was now in command, she had nearly laughed. The thought of something like this happening seemed ridiculous. But when Chakotay had shown he really meant what he'd said, her amused disbelief had faded away only to be replaced anger. And finally terror.
In the early days of their journey, Kathryn had often contemplated the idea of Chakotay and the rest of the Maquis trying to seize the ship, and planned for counterattacks, but as the time had passed it had proved to be unnecessary. For the most part the Maquis had settled in nicely and nearly all of them had stopped to think of themselves as Starfleet and Maquis, but as one crew that was only trying to get home. Little by little even the Captain had forgotten the difference for the most part and chose to embrace the unity of the crew.
So when they all stood in her the Ready Room, with Chakotay handing Tuvok the phaser, ordering her oldest friend to kill her, she couldn't think of a time when she would have been more terrified. Later in the brig, when the crew was back to normal, she couldn't even look at Chakotay properly, for the fear of either going for his throat, or falling over him begging him to tell he would never do anything like this again.
And now, he stood less than two feet behind her. Myriad of thoughts swarmed in her head; the feeling of betrayal fighting with understanding, anger waging a war with forgiveness and pain of his actions against her struggling with the pleading in his voice. "Kathryn...."
Taking her time she slowly turned to face him.
"I'm sorry."
She gazed into his eyes, scrutinized everything she saw in them. Guilt over his actions, plead for forgiveness and fear of being rejected.
Then lowering her eyes, Kathryn reached out and took his hand, holding it her own. She studied it in the same way she'd studied his eyes. Looking back up at him again, she gave his hand a gentle squeeze.
"I know."
The end
RESTORATION By Kayryn Shadow
"Come in."
The light from the corridor lit the darkened quarters for a moment, before the doors closed again. Knowing who it was, Kathryn didn't even bother to turn around, but kept starting the passing stars.
Seconds stretched into minutes, but neither spoke a word. Finally, she could hear his footsteps as he came a little closer. Kathryn thought that the distance between them felt vast, even though she knew he was only a few feet away.
For the past two hours she'd been pacing her quarters, occasionally stopping to stare at a photograph, a PADD or the stars. The events of the last few days kept tormenting her even though she knew the ordeal was over and life back to normal. Or at least back to the Delta Quadrant version of normal.
Kathryn shivered as she thought of how only one obsessed man in the Alpha Quadrant had been able to danger the safety of her ship and crew. The idea of a Maquis mutiny hadn't even crossed her thoughts in years, so when Chakotay had appeared in front of her, announcing that *he* was now in command, she had nearly laughed. The thought of something like this happening seemed ridiculous. But when Chakotay had shown he really meant what he'd said, her amused disbelief had faded away only to be replaced anger. And finally terror.
In the early days of their journey, Kathryn had often contemplated the idea of Chakotay and the rest of the Maquis trying to seize the ship, and planned for counterattacks, but as the time had passed it had proved to be unnecessary. For the most part the Maquis had settled in nicely and nearly all of them had stopped to think of themselves as Starfleet and Maquis, but as one crew that was only trying to get home. Little by little even the Captain had forgotten the difference for the most part and chose to embrace the unity of the crew.
So when they all stood in her the Ready Room, with Chakotay handing Tuvok the phaser, ordering her oldest friend to kill her, she couldn't think of a time when she would have been more terrified. Later in the brig, when the crew was back to normal, she couldn't even look at Chakotay properly, for the fear of either going for his throat, or falling over him begging him to tell he would never do anything like this again.
And now, he stood less than two feet behind her. Myriad of thoughts swarmed in her head; the feeling of betrayal fighting with understanding, anger waging a war with forgiveness and pain of his actions against her struggling with the pleading in his voice. "Kathryn...."
Taking her time she slowly turned to face him.
"I'm sorry."
She gazed into his eyes, scrutinized everything she saw in them. Guilt over his actions, plead for forgiveness and fear of being rejected.
Then lowering her eyes, Kathryn reached out and took his hand, holding it her own. She studied it in the same way she'd studied his eyes. Looking back up at him again, she gave his hand a gentle squeeze.
"I know."
The end