--"Since we've seen each other, a game goes on.
--Secretly I move, and you respond.
--You're winning, you think it's funny.
--But look up from the board now, look how
--I've brought in furniture to this invisible place,
--So we can live here."
'Excerpt from Poem 1245' -Rumi
||
Morning was setting in the Rocket Town home as the skies streaked crimson-orange, and striking-yellow across the canvas of early blue. I could feel the traveling sea air on my face as I stood by the window of the room. I found the mornings in Rocket Town most enjoyable, for it was only six in the morning, and still the town stood quiet. In Nibelheim, by five, people and kids would be rushing out of their homes to go wherever. Perhaps the townspeople here were more calm and laid back, uncaring to the time of day, or just easy with the freedom to do what they wish.
A fair distance away, within the center of the house, I could hear Shera and Cid talking about breakfast (my ears had picked it up), and I could also hear Yuffie moving about to help Shera cook. They talked in unusually quiet voices, in tones I've never heard them talk in. Maybe they also had a habit of keeping quiet around the mornings in Rocket Town as their neighbors do.
A low grumble turned my eyes to the sleeping figure's back on the bed three feet away. Tifa was still asleep, and for another hour I suspected. She had told me she was very tired the night before, as she buried herself in the blankets and wished me a good night, though not before she had asked me why I sleep standing up.
She had asked me why I wasn't going to use the second bed in the room to sleep in. I answered that I slept standing up; though I don't sleep at all. Curiosity broke in her face and she asked then the reason why I slept standing up. I replied that beds never gave me comfort; though I haven't slept in decent bed for a long time. She continued on with her asking of 'whys', and I simply told her that:
"Beds give me no good dreams."
Which wasn't far from truth. The last 'bed' I slept in was the coffin in the Shinra Mansion, where all I saw while I slept were nightmares. Every disgusting, putrid, murderous things would enter my mind to haunt me and keep me begging to be freed. I accepted it as my sin and never bothered to fight it, only take it and learn the lesson to be learned.
After my answer, Tifa seemed to pause to think as she stared at me with round eyes, before asking me if sleeping beside her would help me.
A rather... intriguing offer, but it was also absurd. It would be like... taking advantage over a an innocent woman. I suppose it wouldn't turn out bad, in fact if it relieved me to be beside her, it would certainly help in sleep. I didn't take the offer, of course, rather stupid of me now that I think of it.
I watched the girl in bed curl up in a fetal position, her blankets slipping off to one side, her hair disheveled and creeping around the white sheets like thin, brown vines. I knew I had grown attached, much to my disappointment, I never meant to. I was only supposed to be doing a friend a favor, but she was more than that, she was a close friend. Never did she doubt anyone in her team, never did she doubt me. And in the midst of hardships, she would visit me in my little corner in the Highwind to strike up a conversation. She would try to make me talk to her about favorite things, or things I liked. A lot of the time, I listened to what her favorite things were, because I never responded to her questions.
But she never gave up trying.
At first I thought she was more than a little annoying, then gradually it came to my mind that she was in fact the only one in this group of people we call a team, who would care to communicate with me. I responded to her the first time when she talked about the loss of the Ancient and her worries for Cloud. She was deeply troubled, and her usually smiling lips were dull and straight. An answer from me brought her bright smile back, and her eyes gleaming with satisfaction, and my words were the simplest words there was. She could have gone to see Barret to hear them, yet she reacted like it was all she needed.
"Cheer up Tifa."
That's all it took.
I often wondered why such short words enthralled her and sparked happiness in her eyes in a time such as that. From then on, it was almost like a habit to visit me before she headed to rest, to talk for a couple of minutes or to ask me questions about myself. Before we departed to fight Sephiroth in the Northern Crater, she came to me one night to discuss her future. She asked what I would do, and told me what she would (that of course, was to stay with Cloud). When she talked about the future, she talked as if it had already been predicted to be fulfilling and great. She was so optimistic like that; never bothering to look at the bad side in her plans. I had picked up this keen sense of determining what people stored in their souls, a gift learned from the years of silence. Tifa, no doubt, stored much courage and determination, as well as faith and beauty. But there was a dark side to her ability to be free-spirited; she was also broken inside.
I never asked her, or brought it up to anyone, but no matter how much Tifa smiles outside, she was never happy to begin with, simply masking her grief with a fake crust of 'happy'. From time to time, she would show grief over the bad things that happened, only adding more to her original grief; it was nothing compared to how sad she was inside.
I didn't see her move to face me with blurry eyes, tired and surprised; her body twisted as she supported herself with an elbow.
"Good morning, Vincent," she said in a soft tone like the town itself.
"Good morning," I answered and left my spot at the window to stand near her bed. I felt a little uncomfortable when she awoke when I was just reminiscing about her. She's still sat on the cushions, rubbing her eyes from the sting of the bright morning sun, before turning back to me.
"Did you have a good sleep?"
"Yes," I lied.
"That's good, I did too," she smiled a little and swung her legs to the side and stood up, yawning exhaustion away. I stood by, watching her in her oversized white T-shirt and long flannel pants as she made her way to the window to stare, "They are so quiet here.."
I agreed with her silently before I moved to speak, "I believe Yuffie and Shera are making breakfast, perhaps you'd like to join them," I didn't want to bore her as I stood still, quiet, and a little confused for I felt a feeling to confess something. Maybe I did, because the thoughts of her and my attraction was still lingering in my mind. I couldn't help but just stare at her, admiring the simple yet beautiful way she would carry herself. She didn't have to dress in a beautiful gown, or alluring silks, to be appreciated in beauty. Even her quiet contentness was attracting, and the way she would absorb nature all its own.
"I think I should join them. Then maybe I'll learn how to cook again," she smiled politely and eyed me with searching eyes, "What's wrong?"--she had caught me staring awkwardly.
"Nothing," I replied a little too quickly (stupid...), "You should get going to the kitchens then, they're starting right now."
It didn't work, my way of trying to hide something (which somehow influenced a little idiocy) didn't pass her at all. She walked over to me, in slow strides and cunning smile; I have never seen the cunning side of this Tifa; it made me nervous.
"Vincent? Are you staring at me?" she asked softly, grinning a stupid grin from ear to ear.
I didn't answer, instead I shifted my brows in a 'whatever' position and moved my eyes to a spot on the wall, trying to concentrate elsewhere.
She let out a smile (as I could see from my peripheral vision), and that's when I felt a pair of hands on the brass of my left hand. Instinctively, I would have pulled away and probably ripped the person who touched my clawed arm, but I knew this was Tifa and I wouldn't do that to her. I let her take my arm and moved my eyes to see what she was up to.
"Come with me?" she asked as she gazed at the stripped metal that covered my robotic arm.
There was something about the way she said it that made me terribly upset inside. Don't get me wrong, I didn't mind any of it at all, but I think chaos was stirring inside me with an irritated thrashing. Emotions like these, I was supposed to be immune to them. Never again to feel, or partake. Yet they have opened up, and became uncontrollable. If it wasn't my still existing 'cool', I would have been panicking and avoiding her by now.
She knew I had been silent too long as she looked back up to me, catching my eyes with her smile, "You'll always come with me, right Vincent? You'll never leave me by myself, or with anyone else right?"
I knew she was dependent of me, but I didn't think to the point where she couldn't easily stray along another when giving enough time. I'm sure she didn't mean those words; who knows, maybe Cloud would catch her attention once more and she would be more willing to ease in the comfort of him. And if she did, I'm sure she wouldn't want me following them around like a parent or a guard.
I felt her pull my arm testily, her face contorted into a worried face dramatically, and she looked very upset and near tears, "You won't leave me..."
Maybe she did see me as a parent, guard, etc., to want me by her side always so desperately. I couldn't think the reason would be the attraction I began to feel about her. It was hard to tell what it was actually, and part of me didn't want to know. I nodded to her, "I won't leave you."
She smiled, reassured and taken, as she pulled me to the door to head to the kitchens silently.
If Tifa wanted me by her side always, as a guard and a friend, I would do as she wished because I want to grant her happiness. And if she wanted me by her side always, for the sake of comfort and.... love,
I could do that too.
A/N: Ooh.. a bit over descriptive? ^.^;; Originally, this was supposed to be longer than this (going to the what happens at breakfast) but I decide to cut it off and use it as the next chapter *tee-hee* I'm so evil. But it builds a sort of suspense, doesn't it? And that's always good! Other than that, thank you-thank you my dear readers and reviewers! School's been a pain in the butt, but chapters have been promised and so I answer to them all for you guys ^__^.
Oh yeah.. did that excerpt confuse you? lol. Brief decipheration: The game is love. She thinks it's funny, because she thinks she is winning his love by all her abilities and advantages. When actually, he is providing the things to make the love connection happen. (He and She is not Tifa and Vincent x.x; it's just that the poem deals with how love works with this one guy, and I just incorporated how Vincent will have to deal with it now lol).
*Also*
The Vincent P.O.V. will move within the next chapters
into 3rd P.O.V. or (not for sure yet) into a Tifa P.O.V.
Disclaimer: Squaresoft's chocobos are so cute...