My Thanksgiving

Chapter 5: Winding Road

A/N: You guys, it's been a wonderful ride hasn't it? This is the final chapter, and I am sad to see it end. Thank you, everyone, for all of your support. Ann- you've been a good friend and constant soundboard for ideas. I would remain an idealess and unmotivated writer if not for your efforts. Angie- You rock as both a beta, and as a friend and g/c shipper. I hope this meets you're level concerning grammar seeing as I don't have the time to get this to you… Marita- what can I say? You read all my stuff, and you don't even ship for g/c. You will always remain my first, and one of my best CSI net buds. GraveshiftCSI Group- I don't think I would still be writing if it weren't for you guys… ideas just seem to pop in my head whenever we chat, or e-mail. Thank you for all the inspiration and the new found friendships.

~ ~ ~

And I don't mind saying that I still love it all

I wallowed in the springtime

Now I welcome in the fall

For every moment of joy

Every hour of fear

For Every winding road that brought me here

For every breathe, for every day of living,

This is my Thanksgiving.

~ ~ ~

A peaceful silence had settled between the two of them as they rode down the streets of Vegas, the nightlife settling into a peaceful slumber. For the first time all day she didn't notice the trembling in her hands, now finally starting to subside.  Catherine, to tired and shaken up to drive, sat in the passenger seat of Grissom's Tahoe, her head against the glass window fighting to keep her eyes open.

            "Grissom?"

            "Yea?" he replied, keeping his eyes on the road ahead of him.

            "I need to tell them." She breathed in deeply, knowing she needed release herself from her burden.

            "When you're ready, you will."

She let him brush an errant hair out of her face as they slowed down, stopping at the red light. His touch felt so gentle on her forehead.

"I don't think I ever will be ready."

"I know you Cath, you will be."

"For a man who hasn't seen me in four and a half months you sure have a lot of confidence in me."

"I should have been there."

Wearily she shifted her body in to a position that was facing him. "Yes, but you're here now."

"Now you're willing to forgive?" For a fleeting moment he thought he saw the sparkle returning in her eyes.

"I don't think you'd understand…"

"You're right, I don't. Not that I think that's a bad thing, your complexity is what makes you, you. But I do think I deserve a chance, enlighten me Catherine Willows, what's in that head of yours?"

"You."

"Me?"

"Yes you…. and well, everything."

Inwardly she reminded herself that she needed to take a breath. Settling down for a moment, before continuing she thought about what she was going to say to him. One misstep and they would be back where they started.

 It hadn't been easy to stay in control lately; every moment of her life sent her spinning, careening into depths of darkness she never knew about.  But Grissom's arms had stopped that. The very moment he had thrown his arms around her she felt as if the tension was going away, as if her problems seemed non-existent. How was she supposed to stay mad a man like that? "I forgive you. Do you know why?"

"Honestly Catherine, no I don't. If I were in your position right now, I don't think I could forgive me," he admitted as they pulled into her driveway.

"Life is fleeting Gil. I know that now. You made me realize that, this whole experience made me realize that. All it took was one embrace, and I knew there was no way I would ever be able to stay angry with you. Gil Grissom, we've been blind for much to long."

"Yea."

"I love you, Gil Grissom. And I want to experience that love while I still can."

"Don't talk like that."

"So you're allowed to say it but I'm not, is that it?" Once again anger rose in her, for only a moment, as she registered what he was saying.

"No, no, no. That's not what I meant." Using his shirt, he cleaned off his glasses and placed them on the bridge of his nose. "Catherine, don't talk to me like you're on borrowed time. I…I love you too, and we'll have plenty of time to explore that love…" His hands clutched hers, and he spoke with seriousness only he could ever convey.

"I can't…I can't keep on fighting…not like this. It's just too hard. I can't be strong like this any longer. I've spent my entire life struggling, for myself, for Eddie, for a decent job, for Lindsey. It doesn't ever seem to end Gil."

"You don't need to fight."

"What?"

"Catherine… don't fight. Let me fight for you. Let me struggle…. You said yourself life is fleeting. If it's all right with you, I want to spend mine supporting you."

"Gil….I…I can't—"

Suddenly his lips met hers. Caught off guard slightly, she jumped in her seat before shutting her eyes and enveloping herself in the sweet taste of his mouth. Wrapping his arms around her, she found that his hands were once again entwined in her hair, stroking it as his tongue explored her mouth. Every moment seemed surreal, unrealistic, and she found herself letting the tears flow once again. Salty, wet, tears of joy.

Cupping his hands around her face, he held his lips to hers for just a moment before letting them break apart. Using his thumb, he gently wiped a stray tear from her face.

"Shh…I want to. Please."

His breath was hot and sweet on her face. This. This moment, felt so unbelievably right to her. "Thank you," she whispered, relaxing into his arms. "Thank you so much."

"Your welcome," and he kissed her softly on the forehead. "Cath…do you know what day it is?"

"Wednesday…Oh geez!" she shot up and out of his arms. How could she have possibly forgotten? "Tomorrow…oh lord. Thanksgiving. I nearly forgot."

"You have the night off. Don't worry."

"Do you?"

"Do I what?" he asked, bewildered.

"Have the night off. Do you have the night off? I know you don't usually have any plans; Lindsey would really like to see you… She missed you, almost as much as I have. I mean, if you don't already have plans, we'd love to have you over. I'd love to have you over."

"One condition."

~He's giving me ultimatums~, she thought.

"What condition would that be?"

"That you make some of that famous Catherine Willow Monterey ranch bread. That's my condition…I'll only go for the bread."

Her eyes sparkling; smile playing across her face; she let out a faint laugh.  Studying Grissom's face, he too seemed to have let go of a burden. Somehow, the lines of stress that marred his face faded. A lopsided grin, one that she hadn't seen in months, answered the smile that she had flashed him previously.

"I do make a mean bread…come over whenever you like. And be prepared, Lindsey really has missed you."

"Ok, it's a deal…Cath, seriously, are you sure your alright?"

"No…but it's a start," she sighed, pushing the door open.

"Life. Everyone wandering down their own winding road, searching for themselves." Ambiguously he answered walking around the car and leading her to the doorway. "Always searching."

"Except now I'm not searching alone… Or maybe, just maybe, I've found myself, in you. "

~ Just maybe~, she thought, lingering at the door while Grissom departed back down the driveway. Only entering the house after she saw the Tahoe roar to life, and speed off in the darkness.

~ ~ ~

For everyone who helped me start

And for everything that broke my heart

For every breath, for every day of living,

This is my Thanksgiving

~ ~ ~

*The End*

Be on the lookout for a sequel… I have a few ideas rolling around in my head for a short Christmas story…Nothing  definite, but I thought that I would let you know anyway.

~Allison~