Trying To Cheat Fate.
By: Xiao-chan
Author's Note:
Hey-o everyone! How are you all doing so far? Do you like my fiction? I really.. really hope so, because so far, this is coming out as my best fiction.. Maybe.. just maybe I'll change the names and some of the plot and submit it to a book company? I doubt it. Heehee. Nothing really big today, but it might confuse you on why meiling does what she does.. I'll explain at the after note, all right? No flames!
NO FLAMES.. I don't own CCS.
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Chapter Four: Silver.
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Slowly the pitch black room began to fill back up with the usual shine of morning. Meiling had tossed onto her side, away from Syaoran and the window, pulling the comforter over her head. A gently moan escaped her lips as she felt herself again being dropped back into her horrible reality.
Letting her eyes flutter open slowly, she turned and looked for Syaoran's figure. There was none. She blinked and layed back on her back, closing her eyes and sighing deeply in displeasure. She only hoped that last night she hadn't hurt his feelings as to the point where he didn't even want to be around her.
"Morning, Mei," his voice had gone back to the comforting and loving voice she had known to love for years, she let her body relax for a second, sighing in relief. "Sleep well?" Techincally, Meiling never slept well after finding out her latest change in fate, but she didn't want to worry him more. Her head slowly nodded with the comforter. Syaoran's laugh rang in her ears. "Good. Now, Mrs. Li I have a question to ask you," she nodded again. "Would you like to go to breakfeast this morning?" Her nodding paused. Breakfeast? Somewhere outside the house? Tempting..
"Sure, Syaoran. Love to!" Those two sentences seemed how she wanted them to sound; cheerful, happy, like she was when she was younger. Maybe she was happy right now, maybe just a tad bit because Syaoran wasn't worrying and she wasn't pushing him away from her.
"All right, come and get me when your ready," His footsteps faded, and gently meiling pulled the covers from her head, and stood up.
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His eyes seem to brighten slightly in a mixture of happiness and suprise. Meiling actually looked a bit normal, she didn't seem one bit depressed. Maybe, just maybe, she was slowly coming back to her normal life, away from the depression of her latest note of pregnancy.
The red no sleeved shirt held a rectangle like opening around her neck. The darkened blue jean skirt started after the red shirt and ended about five to seven inches from her knees. A pair of black sandles, showing her toes had been placed upon her feet. Her raven black tresses, which usually were held in place by her eleven year old style of two buns placed on top of her head, tied in ribbon, had been let down, the strands of silkened hair falling a few inches above her waist. She looked so.. so.. good, so beautiful it seemed almost impossible to put it into words.
"M-meiling, you look.." his voice trailed off, trying to find a word to describe her. "So, Mei, you look so.. beautiful," Meiling smiled slightly and walked over to him, placing her arms around him in a tight embrace. She seemed so normal in so little time, yet he couldn't help but embrace back, happily.
She could feel a rush of heat go to her face. She was blushing. Meiling let her arms slowly loosen from around him and wrap around his arm. "Syaoran, can we walk to the place?" The whole fact of Meiling going to normal caused Syaoran to be a bit suspicious, but he nodded slightly, forcing a slight smile to his face. It was a good thing that the place was close, in walking distance.
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"I'm going to go to the bathroom before we leave, all right, Syaoran?" Meiling stood up, pushing her chair slightly into the table. Syaoran nodded, while Meiling made her way down to the bathroom. She found herself slightly shaking, and once making it into the bathroom, she was glad to find that no one else was in there.
Her hand slowly wrapped around the handle which turned the water on in the sink, and pulled slightly, letting warm water fall down in to her other hand. She closed her eyes and splashed it in her face, then looking at herself in the mirror. She blinked and repeated, then finally drying her face, and taking one more glance at herself. Perfectly normal.
She sighed deeply in displeasure and walked out of the room. She was beginning to feel a bit sick. By the time she reached the table where Syaoran and herself had eaten breakfeast, the table had been cleaned and Syaoran had paid for it, and he was waiting for her. Smiling a fake smile, she wrapped her arm around his they left.
Finally, the moment she had been dreading had finally got to it's destination. "Uh, Meiling?" His voice eas shaky. She looked up to him and blinked. "Are.. you feeling okay?" His eyes suddenly shot down to her stomach. She blinked again and looked down, skipping her stomach, to her feet.
"Yes, I'm fine," No accually she wasn't okay, she was feeling sick. She didn't want to lie to him, but she didn't want him worrying over her. Anyway, she had something planned today and she wanted to make him happy right now.
"Are you sure?"
"I'm positive, Syaoran."
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Meiling had been sitting in the front room, a book placed infront of her eyes. She seemed to have been placed in another dream world that exsisted when she was awake, not when she was sleeping. She began to turn the page when the paper slowly cut her finger, giving her a papercut. She looked at her finger, it wasn't bleeded, so she would be all right. Ignoring it, she continued to read.
"I'm going to go out and get something, Meiling," Syaoran said walking to the door. He stopped next to her, and bent down, kissing her gently on her cheek. "Love you," she grinned as he walked off. Once the slam of the door had paused she turned and looked out the window. Syaoran was walking to his car.. Time to do something.
Meiling jumped off of the couch and ran to the kitchen. "Get this over with now, Meiling, while he's gone." She began to rummage, still talking to herself. She felt a small tear run down her cheek, but ignored it. "I love you, Syaoran, but I just can't have this baby," She finally placed her hand over a handle and pulled out a small knife. The silver looked so clean and easy to use...
"I never wanted this baby, so I won't have to have it," she sighed slightly, and looked at the silver of the blade, seeing her reflection. "I never wanted to be a mother, and it's never going to be a concern anymore," she brought the blade to her wrist and began to place gently pressue against it. "But, I love you, Syaoran, and this wasn't your fault.." She pushed harder and finally felt the sharpness of it, and saw a very thin line of blood--
SLAM. "I forgot my--" Syaoran stopped quickly, staring at her. To her displeasure, the knife and her had been facing him, her eyes suddenly turned to his. She pulled the knife away, and held her wrist, which she had just cut.
"I.. I.. I dropped.. it.. and," Syaoran ran over to her, gently grabbing the wrist she had cut, his grip slowly forcing it to release a bit more of blood. He looked at her.
"Meiling..." His voice trailed off, and Meiling could sense the concern in his voice, she looked at her wrist and felt more tears began to fall from her eyes. So close to finishing this off, yet so far. Why did her life have to be so horrible? Why did it all happen to her? Why?
Because she chose to not hesitate. Now all she wanted to do was cheat her fate, and ruin in her life, and kill herself with a silver blade from the kitchen. She wanted suicide, she wanted to get away from her life, but not from Syaoran.. It was impossible.
"Why did you do this, Meiling?" He suddenly felt her body press against his, her crying hysterically finally.
"I'm.. so sorry, Syaoran, I'm sorry, please forgive me, I'm sorry.. Syaoran," he wrapped his arms around her as she cried. "I can't take this, Syaoran, I don't want to have this life. Why did he have to happen to me? Why not no one? Why am I pregnant. Syaoran, I really.. I can't, I'm sorry.."
"It's okay, Meiling," he began to whisper in her eye in a gentle and comforting way. He could see her wrist and the blood on it. If he had brought his keys to the car, she would of.. died some way or the other. Thank god she was alive right now..
But if he was going to help her, he was going to have to tighten his trust for her, and maybe talk to her doctor..
"It's okay, you'll be all right, I promise, Meiling," he placed a gentle kiss on her forehead.
But to tell the truth, he felt like he couldn't trust her anymore, like Meiling was a completely diffrent person, someone he never accually known. He didn't know how to help her.. But he needed to, before she did kill herself over her baby.
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After Note:
A shock? Maybe? So.. I hope it is, and I'm planning some good chapters ahead if you liked these so far. Again, I would enjoy it if you guys used no flames in the reviews and that you would be a kind reviewer and say nice things or something.
Chapter five'll be up sometime?
By: Xiao-chan
Author's Note:
Hey-o everyone! How are you all doing so far? Do you like my fiction? I really.. really hope so, because so far, this is coming out as my best fiction.. Maybe.. just maybe I'll change the names and some of the plot and submit it to a book company? I doubt it. Heehee. Nothing really big today, but it might confuse you on why meiling does what she does.. I'll explain at the after note, all right? No flames!
NO FLAMES.. I don't own CCS.
----------
Chapter Four: Silver.
----------
Slowly the pitch black room began to fill back up with the usual shine of morning. Meiling had tossed onto her side, away from Syaoran and the window, pulling the comforter over her head. A gently moan escaped her lips as she felt herself again being dropped back into her horrible reality.
Letting her eyes flutter open slowly, she turned and looked for Syaoran's figure. There was none. She blinked and layed back on her back, closing her eyes and sighing deeply in displeasure. She only hoped that last night she hadn't hurt his feelings as to the point where he didn't even want to be around her.
"Morning, Mei," his voice had gone back to the comforting and loving voice she had known to love for years, she let her body relax for a second, sighing in relief. "Sleep well?" Techincally, Meiling never slept well after finding out her latest change in fate, but she didn't want to worry him more. Her head slowly nodded with the comforter. Syaoran's laugh rang in her ears. "Good. Now, Mrs. Li I have a question to ask you," she nodded again. "Would you like to go to breakfeast this morning?" Her nodding paused. Breakfeast? Somewhere outside the house? Tempting..
"Sure, Syaoran. Love to!" Those two sentences seemed how she wanted them to sound; cheerful, happy, like she was when she was younger. Maybe she was happy right now, maybe just a tad bit because Syaoran wasn't worrying and she wasn't pushing him away from her.
"All right, come and get me when your ready," His footsteps faded, and gently meiling pulled the covers from her head, and stood up.
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His eyes seem to brighten slightly in a mixture of happiness and suprise. Meiling actually looked a bit normal, she didn't seem one bit depressed. Maybe, just maybe, she was slowly coming back to her normal life, away from the depression of her latest note of pregnancy.
The red no sleeved shirt held a rectangle like opening around her neck. The darkened blue jean skirt started after the red shirt and ended about five to seven inches from her knees. A pair of black sandles, showing her toes had been placed upon her feet. Her raven black tresses, which usually were held in place by her eleven year old style of two buns placed on top of her head, tied in ribbon, had been let down, the strands of silkened hair falling a few inches above her waist. She looked so.. so.. good, so beautiful it seemed almost impossible to put it into words.
"M-meiling, you look.." his voice trailed off, trying to find a word to describe her. "So, Mei, you look so.. beautiful," Meiling smiled slightly and walked over to him, placing her arms around him in a tight embrace. She seemed so normal in so little time, yet he couldn't help but embrace back, happily.
She could feel a rush of heat go to her face. She was blushing. Meiling let her arms slowly loosen from around him and wrap around his arm. "Syaoran, can we walk to the place?" The whole fact of Meiling going to normal caused Syaoran to be a bit suspicious, but he nodded slightly, forcing a slight smile to his face. It was a good thing that the place was close, in walking distance.
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"I'm going to go to the bathroom before we leave, all right, Syaoran?" Meiling stood up, pushing her chair slightly into the table. Syaoran nodded, while Meiling made her way down to the bathroom. She found herself slightly shaking, and once making it into the bathroom, she was glad to find that no one else was in there.
Her hand slowly wrapped around the handle which turned the water on in the sink, and pulled slightly, letting warm water fall down in to her other hand. She closed her eyes and splashed it in her face, then looking at herself in the mirror. She blinked and repeated, then finally drying her face, and taking one more glance at herself. Perfectly normal.
She sighed deeply in displeasure and walked out of the room. She was beginning to feel a bit sick. By the time she reached the table where Syaoran and herself had eaten breakfeast, the table had been cleaned and Syaoran had paid for it, and he was waiting for her. Smiling a fake smile, she wrapped her arm around his they left.
Finally, the moment she had been dreading had finally got to it's destination. "Uh, Meiling?" His voice eas shaky. She looked up to him and blinked. "Are.. you feeling okay?" His eyes suddenly shot down to her stomach. She blinked again and looked down, skipping her stomach, to her feet.
"Yes, I'm fine," No accually she wasn't okay, she was feeling sick. She didn't want to lie to him, but she didn't want him worrying over her. Anyway, she had something planned today and she wanted to make him happy right now.
"Are you sure?"
"I'm positive, Syaoran."
----------
Meiling had been sitting in the front room, a book placed infront of her eyes. She seemed to have been placed in another dream world that exsisted when she was awake, not when she was sleeping. She began to turn the page when the paper slowly cut her finger, giving her a papercut. She looked at her finger, it wasn't bleeded, so she would be all right. Ignoring it, she continued to read.
"I'm going to go out and get something, Meiling," Syaoran said walking to the door. He stopped next to her, and bent down, kissing her gently on her cheek. "Love you," she grinned as he walked off. Once the slam of the door had paused she turned and looked out the window. Syaoran was walking to his car.. Time to do something.
Meiling jumped off of the couch and ran to the kitchen. "Get this over with now, Meiling, while he's gone." She began to rummage, still talking to herself. She felt a small tear run down her cheek, but ignored it. "I love you, Syaoran, but I just can't have this baby," She finally placed her hand over a handle and pulled out a small knife. The silver looked so clean and easy to use...
"I never wanted this baby, so I won't have to have it," she sighed slightly, and looked at the silver of the blade, seeing her reflection. "I never wanted to be a mother, and it's never going to be a concern anymore," she brought the blade to her wrist and began to place gently pressue against it. "But, I love you, Syaoran, and this wasn't your fault.." She pushed harder and finally felt the sharpness of it, and saw a very thin line of blood--
SLAM. "I forgot my--" Syaoran stopped quickly, staring at her. To her displeasure, the knife and her had been facing him, her eyes suddenly turned to his. She pulled the knife away, and held her wrist, which she had just cut.
"I.. I.. I dropped.. it.. and," Syaoran ran over to her, gently grabbing the wrist she had cut, his grip slowly forcing it to release a bit more of blood. He looked at her.
"Meiling..." His voice trailed off, and Meiling could sense the concern in his voice, she looked at her wrist and felt more tears began to fall from her eyes. So close to finishing this off, yet so far. Why did her life have to be so horrible? Why did it all happen to her? Why?
Because she chose to not hesitate. Now all she wanted to do was cheat her fate, and ruin in her life, and kill herself with a silver blade from the kitchen. She wanted suicide, she wanted to get away from her life, but not from Syaoran.. It was impossible.
"Why did you do this, Meiling?" He suddenly felt her body press against his, her crying hysterically finally.
"I'm.. so sorry, Syaoran, I'm sorry, please forgive me, I'm sorry.. Syaoran," he wrapped his arms around her as she cried. "I can't take this, Syaoran, I don't want to have this life. Why did he have to happen to me? Why not no one? Why am I pregnant. Syaoran, I really.. I can't, I'm sorry.."
"It's okay, Meiling," he began to whisper in her eye in a gentle and comforting way. He could see her wrist and the blood on it. If he had brought his keys to the car, she would of.. died some way or the other. Thank god she was alive right now..
But if he was going to help her, he was going to have to tighten his trust for her, and maybe talk to her doctor..
"It's okay, you'll be all right, I promise, Meiling," he placed a gentle kiss on her forehead.
But to tell the truth, he felt like he couldn't trust her anymore, like Meiling was a completely diffrent person, someone he never accually known. He didn't know how to help her.. But he needed to, before she did kill herself over her baby.
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After Note:
A shock? Maybe? So.. I hope it is, and I'm planning some good chapters ahead if you liked these so far. Again, I would enjoy it if you guys used no flames in the reviews and that you would be a kind reviewer and say nice things or something.
Chapter five'll be up sometime?