Harvest of the Soulless

By Poe

Chapter Nine:

Angels and Swine

Entertain us with courage,

Of stories we could never tell,

Train us to love and give,

And never be complete.

We are trapped, you see,

Between the angels and swine,

Complacent, irreverent,

And ultimately, so afraid.

How well it is,

That we are all together,

Trusting nothing,

But still so in love.

            So this was it.

            I saw him, playing in the memories of my head, not as a liar, but as Vegeta. Handsome, looming over me, holding me in a tight grip, and kissing me endlessly. I was in love with him, but was I just a pawn? He wasn't gentle, but there was something about him that was hauntingly fragile. How could that beautiful, frail man, crush me like this?

            I swallowed hard as I thought of what he had done. He had lied to me to get me in bed with him? How typical of a man! How could I have fallen for such a petty trick? I was torn between hating myself and hating him, and confused as to who I was betrayed by. Perhaps it was really me who betrayed myself, my naiveté was so clear to me now.

            Wasn't lying to get what he wanted dishonorable? It was, but I could recall moments where he had been pushed to a point where he could ignore his pride and do what he wanted. There were certain things he would never do, but others, he could always make up an excuse to justify his own actions. But for a man whose pride meant so much to him, certainly ignoring his pride would be an act of desperation.

            Did he want me that much?

            Of course not, I thought, it was just instinct. I was too angry to even consider the  possibility that he had done it because he liked me. I was angry at him for many things, I suppose, not just that. He had pushed me to betray Trunks, someone who seemed to love me more deeply than he could ever, and he pushed me to betray myself. I shouldn't have woken up by his side with that nagging guilt and fettering shame, and I shouldn't have woken up by his side at all. I was supposed to marry Trunks, have a white wedding, and lots of children, and do all of this without the influence of any Saiyan genetics or instincts, or whatever you want to call it. Trunks was what I should deserve and have and if I didn't, something was wrong.

            Right?

            I looked at Trunks and his condition made me cringe. If I loved a man who did that to someone who loved me and whom Vegeta himself had probably loved, I was sick. More so than Vegeta, in some aspects. But that really wasn't the issue now, this whole instinct mess was. I had to talk to Trunks, he would help me with what to do.

            "Trunks?" I questioned, in a more docile tone than the ones I had used before. He didn't say anything, but just looked at me, expectantly.

            "I think I should talk to him."

            I waited for him to respond, but he didn't.

            "You know, straighten things out. Not that we'll actually talk, I'll probably be yelling at him the whole time, that creep-"

            "Pan," he interrupted, "Promise me something."

            "Promise?"

            "I need you to promise me something for your own good."

            "What is it then?"

            "I want you to stay away from Vegeta. His power is… like nothing I've ever seen before. I don't know if this is a side effect of the gene being activated, but it's dangerous. This isn't about you sleeping with him, I just want you to stay away from him. Please, I can forgive you, just promise me." His tone was harsh but sincere.

            "Trunks, I need to talk to him! I'm sorry I can't promise you this, but I also can't just run away from him."

            "Look at what he did to me! Do you really want to be put in that kind of risk?"

            "I'll be fine, he's never hurt me before. He just probably did that to toughen you up, or something. I know he's an asshole, but he won't forget about his honor and kill someone weaker than him. He didn't kill you, did he?"

            "I'm his son, Pan! Think about this! I've known him all my life, obviously, and he's never done anything like this before. I was worried that he was going to attack my mother, and I think that it's only luck that he hasn't-"

            "Not luck, honor. It would be cowardly of him to kill me, you know that. Besides, I don't know why you are making such a big deal out of this."

"Because I care!" he exclaimed, resent pouring out of his words, "I care about you, I have for so long. My love isn't about some gene, I actually like you, damn it! And you keep making me regret it, but you can't stop me from caring."

I was taken a bit aback, but I ignored these feelings. He meant nothing. "Oh, so you love me?" I asked, skeptically.

"Yes, of course!" he responded, as though it were the most obvious thing in the world.

 "Then how come you're telling me this at the same time that Vegeta's going crazy and powerful beyond control? Didn't you say the gene runs in royal blood?"

"What are you implying?"

"What do you think?"

A frustrated pause. "Do you think that I only like you because of the legacy gene?"

"Of course, if makes sense. I mean, if Vegeta likes me because of it, why not you?"

"But, I've liked you before that! Long before that!"

I raised a brow. "Back when I was the lovable Pan that was like a little sister to you? Our age difference might be big, but that's just crossing the line."

"No, not when you were a kid, I've liked you since…" His voice trailed suspiciously off.           

"Since when?"

            "Since…. Well, what does it matter, anyway? I only have a small desire to have children with you, but that's only because I'm getting older. You know, older people like to settle down and have a family, what's so wrong with that?

My jaw fell open. "You do only like me because I'm Saiyan! That stupid gene, messing with me all this time! I can't believe this!"

"No, no, Pan, that's not the reason!" He reached out with a bruised and damaged arm to comfort me but I slapped it away, knowing that hitting him would not really hurt him, even in his state. "But Pan, I'm serious, if my gene was activated, then why aren't I experiencing a surge in power?"

"Didn't you say that the power surge could be anywhere from small to high?" I retorted, forcing back a hint of tears.

"Yes," he grumbled.

"Now you're trying to trick me? It really is the gene! Damn it, am I that unattractive that I can't just have the one guy I want… No, you know what? I'm not going to put up with this. I'm leaving you and Vegeta and I'm moving on with my life."

"Pan, you're being irrational!"

"Of course not! It's what I should've done in the first place!"

"No! Think this over, this is too sudden."

"Sudden? You don't know the half of sudden! I was woken up in the middle of the night to find out that my father was having an affair with Bra, but when really it was Bulma. Then Vegeta tells me that my father secretly like Bra because of some stupid Saiyan instinct, which says I should like Vegeta, and my father can only like Bra. Now I discover that it's not true at all, that only Bra likes my father and Vegeta likes me, and the reason I like Vegeta is still a complete mystery. Also, Vegeta's gone insane, and insanely powerful, and he wants to kill his own son, who I've been dating, and who really doesn't like me at all, but has just tried to deceive me into believing otherwise. Not to mention, all of this has happened within a two-day period. Now, tell me," I said, taking a deep breath, "what's sudden?"

He blinked a few times. "I see your point."

I responded with a glare.

"Pan, I just don't want you to leave me, that's all. I don't care if the reason I love you is because I have to, I still love you. Is that really a crime?"

"Of course, you… swine! You lied to me so you could have the chance to impregnate me! That's a crime to me." I sat down in frustration.

"Your exaggerating, Pan!" he said, still standing.

"Why can't you just leave me alone? I'm so sick of you people ruining my life, it was bad enough as it was."

"Damn it, I love you! I really do!"

"Then go away and stay there." I crossed my arms and looked the other way. I knew it was childish, but I meant what I said. Trunks sighed and sat down, with a bit of care a difficulty, in front of me.

"You don't get it, do you?"

"Huh?"

"There's something you're not understanding."

"Oh? What's that?"

Trunks sighed and ran a bruised hand through his hair. Distantly, I remembered how his hair was softer than mine. "I've told you more than I should."

"Well, obviously for you."

"No, I don't mean it like that. What I mean is that my father probably suspects that I've told you something, and now that I have, he can find out and be very angry at the both of us."

"Why would he be angry at me?"

Trunks shrugged. "For being so involved."

I rolled my eyes. "He should be happy I'm involved at all."

"Well, the reason I'm telling you this is that… I feel like I can't leave you or he might hurt you."

"Don't go protective on me," I snapped, "I can take care of myself."

"Pan, he nearly killed me. Who knows what's going on in his mind."

"Didn't we just talk about this?"

"I guess," he sighed.

"So it's settled, then."

"It is?"

"Yes. You can leave now, and you probably should. I mean, you came here in what looked like the verge of death."

"You care?"

My eyes widened. "I'm not heartless."

"Yeah, but that kind of surprised me. I didn't think you would mind if I just died on the spot."

"You know, it's a bit suspicious that you could come all the way over here, strike up a conversation with me, and not pass out or die or something."

"I didn't lose that badly," he said, stubbornly.

"I think your power's higher than you think it is. But why are we talking about this? I'm mad at you and your father, so you both should die for all I care!"

He laughed. "You sure change subjects at strange times."

I glared. "What is it with everyone treating me like a kid and not taking me seriously? I have every reason to be mad at you, and I can change the subject any time I want."

"Pan, I forgive you! That's saying a lot. Please stop being angry with me!"

"You don't love me! Stop lying!" I stood up.

Trunks paused for a second as though he noticed something. I raised an eyebrow. He suddenly jumped up, and his expression turned angry. "You don't have to believe me, but it's true. And since you like things always your way, you should be happy. Vegeta's on his way, probably to kill us both."

"What?" I exclaimed.

"I just felt his ki, he's on his way."

"Is this a joke?"

"He'll be here soon, you'll be able to detect it."

"What the hell are you talking about? Why would he be coming now?"

"To kill us both, I said already. He's going to kill me for telling and you for knowing."

"He won't kill us, no way."

"I know him, Pan, he's going to at least hurt one of us."

"I'm so angry at him! He's going to get it once he gets here, he really is!"

"You won't have time to complain, he'll probably final flash you to your grave and there's nothing I can do about it."

"Trunks, I think you're the one exaggerating." I stopped and cringed as I felt his ki signature. So Trunks was right. "Oh damn it, he really is coming."

Trunks threw up his hands in frustration. "Now we wait. And it shouldn't be long."

"You act like your giving up. You never give up," I pointed out.

His eyebrows rose. "I'm not. And I'm not giving you away either. I just know when it's a battle with no hope."

"Is he really that powerful?" I scoffed.

"You'll see for yourself."

I doubted him, thanks to my stubborn courage. I didn't think a mere gene, a chemical messenger, could create a monstrosity that could threaten both of our lives. Instead, I just stood there with Trunks, an awkward silence settling over us that neither of us cared to break. 

Vegeta neared, and both of us remained calm on the exterior. A visit from the Saiyan prince was nothing new to the both of us, we simply had to treat it thusly. Nothing special, nothing phenomenal, just another moment with the most annoying Saiyan around.

I sighed and looked at Trunks, still covered in injuries and faring quite well. How was it that he managed to do that? Was it really the gene? With Vegeta on his way, I couldn't help but wonder.

"Pan?" Trunks ventured, his eyes meeting mine sternly.

"What?"

"Stay away from him. He can kill us all."

With the way he was acting, I could've mistaken him for a man who seriously loved me. He said this with such passion it was almost as though he meant it. Trunks said he had forgiven me, but I wondered if he really had. With the stern tone of his voice, it made me think he loved me enough to be deeply hurt by what I did to him. It seemed like he hadn't come to terms with this yet, that he cared so much for me that he was only on the way to forgiving me.

I sighed. There were other questions, but for now, I could only wait.

"Will he, Trunks?" I said, so jaded, feeling Vegeta's ki nearing so close he could descend any moment, "Will he?"

Trunks sighed. "I wish I knew."

Trunks might've been older than me, but he missed something that came clearly to me. My question was rhetorical, but his was sincere. He just didn't understand, and thought so ignorantly he did.

But I knew, I knew quite well.

I only wished Trunks could agree with me.