Shortly after 9:30 on Sunday morning, Sydney rolled onto her back and stared up at the ceiling of Vaughn's room. She could hear him next to her, breathing softly as he slept. She could imagine the peaceful expression on his face, but she couldn't bring herself to look at him. So she kept her eyes fixed to the ceiling, as if somehow, it would give her the strength she needed to get through this morning.
She scolded herself for feeling this way, told herself that she knew it was coming, and that she should just suck it up. But she couldn't. In a a couple of hours, she was going to have to say goodbye to Vaughn. Of course, she would see him again soon, maybe even tomorrow after Sloane gave her a new mission. But it wouldn't be the same. She wouldn't get to touch him or kiss him or feel the warmth of his breath on her neck. Instead, things would be strictly professional. She and Vaughn were going to have to play this by the book until . . . until when exactly? That was the question that was gnawing at her in the pit of her stomach. She had assured both Vaughn and herself that she could endure the wait, but now the thought of being with him but not being able to *be* with him was causing her actual physical pain. Her stomach was tied up in knots, and she was starting to feel sick to her stomach.
This is ridiculous, she thought as she blinked back tears. She could be stronger than this. She *had* to be, not so much for herself, but for Vaughn. She knew that if he knew she was feeling this way, he would blame himself for getting carried away with her this weekend. After all, he was the handler here, the one who was supposed to be responsible and put the agency before all else. But he hadn't; he had put *her* before all else. She loved him so much for that, and didn't want him to regret it. So for his sake, at least, she had to pretend that her heart wasn't breaking at the idea of leaving him today.
She remained deep in thought until she felt Vaughn stir next to her. Despite her mood, she smiled at the fact that she had woken up before him for a second day in a row. She wondered if it would be that way in the future, her waking up first and getting dressed and making coffee before he even dragged himself out of bed. She could almost picture it, until reality smacked her in the face and she remembered that there wouldn't be any mornings like that any time soon-- if ever. She groaned softly. She couldn't allow herself to think that way. She'd have to tell her inner pessimist to shut up. She needed something to fight for, and there was nothing she wanted more than to wake up next to Vaughn every morning.
Vaughn glanced back over his right shoulder to see if Sydney was awake yet. He saw her laying on her back, looking up at the ceiling with a deep frown of concentration on her face. He didn't have to guess what she was thinking about, especially when he heard her frustrated sigh. He rolled onto his back and placed his head next to hers on her pillow.
"Hey," he said softly.
"Hi."
They laid silently for a while, both staring up at the ceiling lost in their own thoughts until Vaughn broke the silence.
"Do you have a lot of stuff to pack?"
"No, I've been living out of my suitcase. I always do, for some reason. I guess it's because my missions are so short that I never really have time to unpack. So now I never do, not even when I'm on vacation. You?"
"I always unpack. I think I got that from my dad. He was such an orderly guy. I don't remember going on that many vacations with him, but when we did, he would always immediately unpack everything and put his suitcase in the closet. It used to drive my mom crazy. She always wanted to just throw the bags in the room so we could go out and do something fun."
Sydney smiled. "I want to meet your mom someday."
"She would love you, Syd. You two are a lot alike. She'd love how smart and feisty you are, how resilient you are. But mostly, I think she would just love you because I do."
"Really? So she's liked all your girlfriends? Just because you did?" she asked teasingly.
"Noooo," he said with a chuckle. "She definitely has not liked all my girlfriends. But I know that she would love you because if she took one look at my face and saw how happy you make me, she'd know -- "
"Know what?" Sydney asked when he hesitated.
"She would know that I'd finally found the woman I was meant to be with," he said quietly. "My mom's kind of anxious for me to settle down," he admitted sheepishly.
"Really?" Sydney laughed.
"Yeah. She wants grandchildren running around her house, climbing on furniture and breaking things. She's always telling me that by the time I meet someone and have kids, she'll be too old to pick them up," he laughed. "She's wicked with the guilt trips, but she would be a great grandmother."
"She sounds like it." Sydney could almost imagine sitting with Vaughn and his mother while adorable dark haired, green eyed children played at their feet. That beautiful fantasy was quickly replaced with harsh thoughts of reality, however.
"Vaughn, your mom would freak out when she learned the truth about me, that my mother killed you father. She would probably hate me."
"Syd, what makes you think that? I know the truth and I don't hate you. She would never blame you for what your mother did, especially if she knew how crazy I was about you."
"Vaughn, come on! The only reason *you* don't hate me is because we were friends before you found out. But your mom doesn't know me at all. I wouldn't blame her if she did hate me."
"Sydney, my mom would never hate you. Trust me," he said firmly.
Sydney sighed. She prayed he was right. She knew that Vaughn's mother was the most important person in his life, and she would want to have a good relationship with her. Suddenly she laughed.
"What's so funny?"
"Me. I'm already terrified that your mom won't like me, even though there's no guarantee that I'll ever even meet her. I'm getting way ahead of myself."
She sighed deeply. "Our lives are profoundly screwed up."
"Tell me about it," he said with a short laugh. "But at least they're not boring, right? That's got to count for something."
"Yeah, I guess."
They fell back into a comfortable silence until Sydney spoke again. "I miss you already, Vaughn."
"What?" he asked, with a confused smile.
"In a couple of hours, we're going to say goodbye and go back home. And when we see each other again, it's not going to be the same. I just already know how much I'm going to miss this, laying in bed with you talking about everything and nothing."
He reached for her hand and laced his fingers through hers. "Things would be a lot easier if you had caught another elevator, wouldn't they?"
"Yeah, but then I wouldn't have spent this incredible weekend with you. I wouldn't know that you love me, and you wouldn't know that you're the best thing in my life." She sighed. "Leaving this place is going to be the hardest thing I've ever done in my life, but I don't regret anything that happened between us, Vaughn. Knowing that you love me but that we can't be together is a million times better than not knowing *how* you feel about me."
"You're a liar," he said with a soft laugh.
She couldn't help but laugh with him. "You know me too well. Yes, I'm trying to psyche myself up," she admitted.
"Is it working?"
"Not really," she sighed. "It's hard to miss what you've never had, you know? So if we hadn't had this weekend together, maybe I could have just gone on living my life, wanting you and hoping that you wanted me too. I suppose that, in some ways, that would have been easier. But at the same time, the last two days were honestly the best two days of my life. I wouldn't give those back for anything."
"Neither would I," he said, bringing their intertwined hands to his lips and kissing the back of her hand. "Still, it's going to kill me to see you and not be able to touch you. I don't even want to think about how hard it's going to be when we're in the ops center together. I don't think I'm not a good enough actor to hide the way I feel about you."
"Couldn't we find a way to --"
"No," Vaughn said firmly.
Sydney smiled, "You don't even know what I was going to say."
"Yes I do. You were going to ask if we could find a way to meet each other in secret. I wish we could, Syd. I would go to the sleaziest motel in town if it meant that we could be together, but we can't. I will not take any chances with your life, Sydney. I just won't. I can't," he said, his voice husky with emotion.
"Are you speaking as my handler now or my -- I don't even know what to call you," she shook her head ruefully.
"I'm speaking as the man who loves you and wants to spend his life with you. I can't do that if SD-6 has you killed. Things are dangerous enough without us sneaking around L.A. trying to spend time with each other," he said with a heavy sigh. "Syd, my only job right now is to keep you safe. I'm going to do that, no matter how much self-sacrifice it requires. You have to let me do that."
Sydney knew he was right, and that he meant it when he said that he would do anything to keep her safe. No one had ever been so protective of her, she thought. She suddenly bolted upright and looked down at Vaughn, surprising him with her sudden movement.
"Vaughn," she said, an uneasy tone in her voice, "You have to promise me something."
"What?" he asked, as he sat up to look at her. The urgent tone in her voice was starting to scare him.
"You have to promise me that, no matter what happens, no matter how hard it is for us to keep our relationship professional . . ." her voice broke, "you have to promise me that you won't let anyone replace you as my handler."
"Sydney, what makes you think I would ever let that happen?"
"I don't know," she said, taking his hands in hers and looking down into her lap. "You might decide that it's too hard to be around me and hide your feelings. Or, knowing you, you might think that your feelings are a liability and decide that I would be better off being handled by someone who doesn't have an emotional attachment to me. I don't know, I just know that you can't leave me alone in this. I can't do this without you, Vaughn. I *need* you, I need you fighting with me."
"Syd," he said firmly, moving his hand into her hair and gently tilting her head until she looked at him. He could see the tears glistening in the corner of her eyes. "Sydney, I'm not going anywhere, don't worry. I would *never* let anyone replace me as your handler, because I don't trust anyone else to protect you, not even your father. Hey," he said, his voice softer and lower, "we're in this together, until it's over. I promise."
Sydney let out a sigh of relief, and leaned forward to kiss him softly on the lips. "Thank god." Knowing that they were in this together was the only thing giving her the strength to keep fighting. As long as she could be sure of that, she would fight with everything she had in her.
Vaughn grinned at her, and she instinctively reached out to touch his dimples. "You were really scared weren't you?" he asked teasingly. The only time he had ever seen her look that scared was when they had been separated by that door in Taipei.
"Yeah, I admit it. I was scared. But now I know that I don't have to be, so I'm fine."
"Good." He glanced behind her and groaned softly. "Syd, it's after ten. We have to check out of here by noon."
Sydney turned around and silently cursed the clock. Time was definitely not her friend right now, as Vaughn climbed out of the bed.
"I still have to pack and take a shower," he said, yawning and stretching at the same time.
"Okay, you go ahead. I'm going to go back to my room, and I'll meet you back here in a little while."
"Okay," he said, bending back down to quickly kiss her. "Hurry back."
"You won't even have a chance to miss me."
A mischievous grin spread across Sydney's face as she watched him turn and walk into the bathroom. She waited until she heard the shower running for a few minutes, and then slipped out of the bed. She quietly walked into the bathroom, and opened the glass door to the shower, slipping in behind him. She pressed her body against his and wrapped her arms around his waist. "I was going to leave, but it occurred to me that you might need someone to wash your back," she whispered seductively in his ear.
He turned around with an amused grin on his face and gently pushed her until her back was pressed against the wall of the shower. "You are incorrigible, Sydney Bristow. Do you know that?"
She simply smiled as his lips found her neck. If time was of the essence, she was definitely going to make the most of it.
*****
Sydney folded the last of Vaughn's shirts and placed it in his suitcase as he checked the drawers to make sure he hadn't forgotten anything. "Has anyone ever told you that you pack like a girl, Vaughn? You have so many clothes here," she said with a laugh.
"I do *not* pack like a girl," he said indignantly. "First of all, I was a here for a whole week. Secondly, I had to pack ski clothes, and regular clothes, and --"
"Vaughn, it's okay," Sydney cut him off as she sat down on the bed. "I was just messing with you."
"Your favorite pastime," he said with a laugh, as he walked over and zipped his suitcase. They were interrupted by a knock at the door. "That's probably the bellman," he said.
Vaughn opened the door and watched as the bellman collected his bags and Sydney's bags, which were near the door. "Do you mind going ahead with those and leaving them in the lobby?" he asked. "We'll be down in a few minutes."
"No problem, sir," the bellman replied as Vaughn tipped him. "Thanks."
Vaughn closed the door behind him, and walked over to Sydney, with his hands in his pockets. She tried to memorize the way he looked. Jeans, navy turtleneck, navy and red sleeveless fleece. She knew it would be a while before she saw him this way again. She probably wouldn't see him in anything other than suits for the foreseeable future. She reached out and gently tugged at the bottom of his fleece. "You're so hot," she said with a smile.
He laughed as he grabbed one of her arms and pulled her up until she was standing. "Not as hot as you are," he said, resting his forehead against hers. He took a deep breath. "Syd, I don't know how to say goodbye to you."
"Then don't," she murmured. "Besides, we're not really saying goodbye. Sloane will probably give me a new mission as soon as I get back to work, so we might see each other as early as tomorrow."
"I know, it just won't be the same."
"No," she agreed. "Things go back to being real tomorrow."
"Hey," he said, pulling his head back so he could look at her. "*This* was real. Everything that we did here this weekend, all the time that we spent together, that was real. It's the *only* real thing we've done since we met each other."
"You're right," she nodded. "This was real. It *is* real," she corrected herself. She gently caressed his face. "I love you, Vaughn. *Michael*," she said with a chuckle.
"Hey, that's the first time you've ever called me Michael."
"Yeah, don't get used to it. It doesn't exactly roll off my tongue."
He laughed. "I know. It sounds weird to hear you say it, actually. Besides, I like it when you call me by my last name, especially when you whisper it in my ear the way you did last night. That was really sexy."
She pushed him playfully. "Stop, before you make me blush. Hey, look at the time," she exclaimed, trying to change the subject. "We have to go."
"Okay," he said, pulling her back into him, "but not before I tell you that I love you. Thanks for the best weekend of my life."
"The pleasure was all mine, Vaughn. All mine." She pulled his head down to hers and kissed him like she had never kissed anyone in her entire life. His arms wrapped tighter around her, leaving no space between them at all. Their kiss became more urgent, more desperate, as if they were trying to make up for for all the kisses they would be denied in the future. When they could no longer breathe, they finally broke the kiss and simply held each other as time melted away.
*****
Sydney and Vaughn stood next to each other outside the hotel as he waited for his rental car to be brought around and she waited for a taxi. They had both agreed that they couldn't take the risk of riding to the airport together. Starting now, things had to go back to the way they had been, even though they knew that everything between them had changed. When, Vaughn's car was brought around, he turned to her and gave her a long, meaningful look, his eyes saying all the things that his mouth couldn't. After what seemed like forever, he softly touched her hand and said, "See you back in L.A. Have a safe trip back."
"You too," she said, smiling, but trying to fight the lump in her throat. She watched as he got in the car. Right before he left, he mouthed, "I love you." She smiled and nodded. As she watched him drive away, she whispered, "I love you, too, Vaughn. More than you know."
A few minutes later, as she rode to the airport, she looked out the window of the taxi and appreciated the scenery one last time. She smiled as memories of the weekend flooded her mind. She knew she would never forget skiing with Vaughn, or their sleigh ride, or making love to him. She would hold onto those memories until the time came when they could begin making new memories together. That that day would come eventually. She wouldn't rest until it did.
Sydney's thoughts then turned to Sloane. She wondered how he had spent his weekend. He would *never* know how she had spent her weekend. He would never know how this weekend had changed her life. He would never know that his ultimate downfall could be traced back to this weekend.
Arvin Sloane had made many mistakes in his life, but, of all of them, the biggest wasn't betraying the CIA. It wasn't getting involved in the Alliance. It wasn't even killing Emily and Danny. No, the biggest mistake Sloane had ever made was giving her three days and two nights alone with Michael Vaughn. That was all it took to refocus and redouble her energy towards destroying SD-6. Sloane would never know that Sydney's long weekend was the beginning of his end.
Fin.
She scolded herself for feeling this way, told herself that she knew it was coming, and that she should just suck it up. But she couldn't. In a a couple of hours, she was going to have to say goodbye to Vaughn. Of course, she would see him again soon, maybe even tomorrow after Sloane gave her a new mission. But it wouldn't be the same. She wouldn't get to touch him or kiss him or feel the warmth of his breath on her neck. Instead, things would be strictly professional. She and Vaughn were going to have to play this by the book until . . . until when exactly? That was the question that was gnawing at her in the pit of her stomach. She had assured both Vaughn and herself that she could endure the wait, but now the thought of being with him but not being able to *be* with him was causing her actual physical pain. Her stomach was tied up in knots, and she was starting to feel sick to her stomach.
This is ridiculous, she thought as she blinked back tears. She could be stronger than this. She *had* to be, not so much for herself, but for Vaughn. She knew that if he knew she was feeling this way, he would blame himself for getting carried away with her this weekend. After all, he was the handler here, the one who was supposed to be responsible and put the agency before all else. But he hadn't; he had put *her* before all else. She loved him so much for that, and didn't want him to regret it. So for his sake, at least, she had to pretend that her heart wasn't breaking at the idea of leaving him today.
She remained deep in thought until she felt Vaughn stir next to her. Despite her mood, she smiled at the fact that she had woken up before him for a second day in a row. She wondered if it would be that way in the future, her waking up first and getting dressed and making coffee before he even dragged himself out of bed. She could almost picture it, until reality smacked her in the face and she remembered that there wouldn't be any mornings like that any time soon-- if ever. She groaned softly. She couldn't allow herself to think that way. She'd have to tell her inner pessimist to shut up. She needed something to fight for, and there was nothing she wanted more than to wake up next to Vaughn every morning.
Vaughn glanced back over his right shoulder to see if Sydney was awake yet. He saw her laying on her back, looking up at the ceiling with a deep frown of concentration on her face. He didn't have to guess what she was thinking about, especially when he heard her frustrated sigh. He rolled onto his back and placed his head next to hers on her pillow.
"Hey," he said softly.
"Hi."
They laid silently for a while, both staring up at the ceiling lost in their own thoughts until Vaughn broke the silence.
"Do you have a lot of stuff to pack?"
"No, I've been living out of my suitcase. I always do, for some reason. I guess it's because my missions are so short that I never really have time to unpack. So now I never do, not even when I'm on vacation. You?"
"I always unpack. I think I got that from my dad. He was such an orderly guy. I don't remember going on that many vacations with him, but when we did, he would always immediately unpack everything and put his suitcase in the closet. It used to drive my mom crazy. She always wanted to just throw the bags in the room so we could go out and do something fun."
Sydney smiled. "I want to meet your mom someday."
"She would love you, Syd. You two are a lot alike. She'd love how smart and feisty you are, how resilient you are. But mostly, I think she would just love you because I do."
"Really? So she's liked all your girlfriends? Just because you did?" she asked teasingly.
"Noooo," he said with a chuckle. "She definitely has not liked all my girlfriends. But I know that she would love you because if she took one look at my face and saw how happy you make me, she'd know -- "
"Know what?" Sydney asked when he hesitated.
"She would know that I'd finally found the woman I was meant to be with," he said quietly. "My mom's kind of anxious for me to settle down," he admitted sheepishly.
"Really?" Sydney laughed.
"Yeah. She wants grandchildren running around her house, climbing on furniture and breaking things. She's always telling me that by the time I meet someone and have kids, she'll be too old to pick them up," he laughed. "She's wicked with the guilt trips, but she would be a great grandmother."
"She sounds like it." Sydney could almost imagine sitting with Vaughn and his mother while adorable dark haired, green eyed children played at their feet. That beautiful fantasy was quickly replaced with harsh thoughts of reality, however.
"Vaughn, your mom would freak out when she learned the truth about me, that my mother killed you father. She would probably hate me."
"Syd, what makes you think that? I know the truth and I don't hate you. She would never blame you for what your mother did, especially if she knew how crazy I was about you."
"Vaughn, come on! The only reason *you* don't hate me is because we were friends before you found out. But your mom doesn't know me at all. I wouldn't blame her if she did hate me."
"Sydney, my mom would never hate you. Trust me," he said firmly.
Sydney sighed. She prayed he was right. She knew that Vaughn's mother was the most important person in his life, and she would want to have a good relationship with her. Suddenly she laughed.
"What's so funny?"
"Me. I'm already terrified that your mom won't like me, even though there's no guarantee that I'll ever even meet her. I'm getting way ahead of myself."
She sighed deeply. "Our lives are profoundly screwed up."
"Tell me about it," he said with a short laugh. "But at least they're not boring, right? That's got to count for something."
"Yeah, I guess."
They fell back into a comfortable silence until Sydney spoke again. "I miss you already, Vaughn."
"What?" he asked, with a confused smile.
"In a couple of hours, we're going to say goodbye and go back home. And when we see each other again, it's not going to be the same. I just already know how much I'm going to miss this, laying in bed with you talking about everything and nothing."
He reached for her hand and laced his fingers through hers. "Things would be a lot easier if you had caught another elevator, wouldn't they?"
"Yeah, but then I wouldn't have spent this incredible weekend with you. I wouldn't know that you love me, and you wouldn't know that you're the best thing in my life." She sighed. "Leaving this place is going to be the hardest thing I've ever done in my life, but I don't regret anything that happened between us, Vaughn. Knowing that you love me but that we can't be together is a million times better than not knowing *how* you feel about me."
"You're a liar," he said with a soft laugh.
She couldn't help but laugh with him. "You know me too well. Yes, I'm trying to psyche myself up," she admitted.
"Is it working?"
"Not really," she sighed. "It's hard to miss what you've never had, you know? So if we hadn't had this weekend together, maybe I could have just gone on living my life, wanting you and hoping that you wanted me too. I suppose that, in some ways, that would have been easier. But at the same time, the last two days were honestly the best two days of my life. I wouldn't give those back for anything."
"Neither would I," he said, bringing their intertwined hands to his lips and kissing the back of her hand. "Still, it's going to kill me to see you and not be able to touch you. I don't even want to think about how hard it's going to be when we're in the ops center together. I don't think I'm not a good enough actor to hide the way I feel about you."
"Couldn't we find a way to --"
"No," Vaughn said firmly.
Sydney smiled, "You don't even know what I was going to say."
"Yes I do. You were going to ask if we could find a way to meet each other in secret. I wish we could, Syd. I would go to the sleaziest motel in town if it meant that we could be together, but we can't. I will not take any chances with your life, Sydney. I just won't. I can't," he said, his voice husky with emotion.
"Are you speaking as my handler now or my -- I don't even know what to call you," she shook her head ruefully.
"I'm speaking as the man who loves you and wants to spend his life with you. I can't do that if SD-6 has you killed. Things are dangerous enough without us sneaking around L.A. trying to spend time with each other," he said with a heavy sigh. "Syd, my only job right now is to keep you safe. I'm going to do that, no matter how much self-sacrifice it requires. You have to let me do that."
Sydney knew he was right, and that he meant it when he said that he would do anything to keep her safe. No one had ever been so protective of her, she thought. She suddenly bolted upright and looked down at Vaughn, surprising him with her sudden movement.
"Vaughn," she said, an uneasy tone in her voice, "You have to promise me something."
"What?" he asked, as he sat up to look at her. The urgent tone in her voice was starting to scare him.
"You have to promise me that, no matter what happens, no matter how hard it is for us to keep our relationship professional . . ." her voice broke, "you have to promise me that you won't let anyone replace you as my handler."
"Sydney, what makes you think I would ever let that happen?"
"I don't know," she said, taking his hands in hers and looking down into her lap. "You might decide that it's too hard to be around me and hide your feelings. Or, knowing you, you might think that your feelings are a liability and decide that I would be better off being handled by someone who doesn't have an emotional attachment to me. I don't know, I just know that you can't leave me alone in this. I can't do this without you, Vaughn. I *need* you, I need you fighting with me."
"Syd," he said firmly, moving his hand into her hair and gently tilting her head until she looked at him. He could see the tears glistening in the corner of her eyes. "Sydney, I'm not going anywhere, don't worry. I would *never* let anyone replace me as your handler, because I don't trust anyone else to protect you, not even your father. Hey," he said, his voice softer and lower, "we're in this together, until it's over. I promise."
Sydney let out a sigh of relief, and leaned forward to kiss him softly on the lips. "Thank god." Knowing that they were in this together was the only thing giving her the strength to keep fighting. As long as she could be sure of that, she would fight with everything she had in her.
Vaughn grinned at her, and she instinctively reached out to touch his dimples. "You were really scared weren't you?" he asked teasingly. The only time he had ever seen her look that scared was when they had been separated by that door in Taipei.
"Yeah, I admit it. I was scared. But now I know that I don't have to be, so I'm fine."
"Good." He glanced behind her and groaned softly. "Syd, it's after ten. We have to check out of here by noon."
Sydney turned around and silently cursed the clock. Time was definitely not her friend right now, as Vaughn climbed out of the bed.
"I still have to pack and take a shower," he said, yawning and stretching at the same time.
"Okay, you go ahead. I'm going to go back to my room, and I'll meet you back here in a little while."
"Okay," he said, bending back down to quickly kiss her. "Hurry back."
"You won't even have a chance to miss me."
A mischievous grin spread across Sydney's face as she watched him turn and walk into the bathroom. She waited until she heard the shower running for a few minutes, and then slipped out of the bed. She quietly walked into the bathroom, and opened the glass door to the shower, slipping in behind him. She pressed her body against his and wrapped her arms around his waist. "I was going to leave, but it occurred to me that you might need someone to wash your back," she whispered seductively in his ear.
He turned around with an amused grin on his face and gently pushed her until her back was pressed against the wall of the shower. "You are incorrigible, Sydney Bristow. Do you know that?"
She simply smiled as his lips found her neck. If time was of the essence, she was definitely going to make the most of it.
*****
Sydney folded the last of Vaughn's shirts and placed it in his suitcase as he checked the drawers to make sure he hadn't forgotten anything. "Has anyone ever told you that you pack like a girl, Vaughn? You have so many clothes here," she said with a laugh.
"I do *not* pack like a girl," he said indignantly. "First of all, I was a here for a whole week. Secondly, I had to pack ski clothes, and regular clothes, and --"
"Vaughn, it's okay," Sydney cut him off as she sat down on the bed. "I was just messing with you."
"Your favorite pastime," he said with a laugh, as he walked over and zipped his suitcase. They were interrupted by a knock at the door. "That's probably the bellman," he said.
Vaughn opened the door and watched as the bellman collected his bags and Sydney's bags, which were near the door. "Do you mind going ahead with those and leaving them in the lobby?" he asked. "We'll be down in a few minutes."
"No problem, sir," the bellman replied as Vaughn tipped him. "Thanks."
Vaughn closed the door behind him, and walked over to Sydney, with his hands in his pockets. She tried to memorize the way he looked. Jeans, navy turtleneck, navy and red sleeveless fleece. She knew it would be a while before she saw him this way again. She probably wouldn't see him in anything other than suits for the foreseeable future. She reached out and gently tugged at the bottom of his fleece. "You're so hot," she said with a smile.
He laughed as he grabbed one of her arms and pulled her up until she was standing. "Not as hot as you are," he said, resting his forehead against hers. He took a deep breath. "Syd, I don't know how to say goodbye to you."
"Then don't," she murmured. "Besides, we're not really saying goodbye. Sloane will probably give me a new mission as soon as I get back to work, so we might see each other as early as tomorrow."
"I know, it just won't be the same."
"No," she agreed. "Things go back to being real tomorrow."
"Hey," he said, pulling his head back so he could look at her. "*This* was real. Everything that we did here this weekend, all the time that we spent together, that was real. It's the *only* real thing we've done since we met each other."
"You're right," she nodded. "This was real. It *is* real," she corrected herself. She gently caressed his face. "I love you, Vaughn. *Michael*," she said with a chuckle.
"Hey, that's the first time you've ever called me Michael."
"Yeah, don't get used to it. It doesn't exactly roll off my tongue."
He laughed. "I know. It sounds weird to hear you say it, actually. Besides, I like it when you call me by my last name, especially when you whisper it in my ear the way you did last night. That was really sexy."
She pushed him playfully. "Stop, before you make me blush. Hey, look at the time," she exclaimed, trying to change the subject. "We have to go."
"Okay," he said, pulling her back into him, "but not before I tell you that I love you. Thanks for the best weekend of my life."
"The pleasure was all mine, Vaughn. All mine." She pulled his head down to hers and kissed him like she had never kissed anyone in her entire life. His arms wrapped tighter around her, leaving no space between them at all. Their kiss became more urgent, more desperate, as if they were trying to make up for for all the kisses they would be denied in the future. When they could no longer breathe, they finally broke the kiss and simply held each other as time melted away.
*****
Sydney and Vaughn stood next to each other outside the hotel as he waited for his rental car to be brought around and she waited for a taxi. They had both agreed that they couldn't take the risk of riding to the airport together. Starting now, things had to go back to the way they had been, even though they knew that everything between them had changed. When, Vaughn's car was brought around, he turned to her and gave her a long, meaningful look, his eyes saying all the things that his mouth couldn't. After what seemed like forever, he softly touched her hand and said, "See you back in L.A. Have a safe trip back."
"You too," she said, smiling, but trying to fight the lump in her throat. She watched as he got in the car. Right before he left, he mouthed, "I love you." She smiled and nodded. As she watched him drive away, she whispered, "I love you, too, Vaughn. More than you know."
A few minutes later, as she rode to the airport, she looked out the window of the taxi and appreciated the scenery one last time. She smiled as memories of the weekend flooded her mind. She knew she would never forget skiing with Vaughn, or their sleigh ride, or making love to him. She would hold onto those memories until the time came when they could begin making new memories together. That that day would come eventually. She wouldn't rest until it did.
Sydney's thoughts then turned to Sloane. She wondered how he had spent his weekend. He would *never* know how she had spent her weekend. He would never know how this weekend had changed her life. He would never know that his ultimate downfall could be traced back to this weekend.
Arvin Sloane had made many mistakes in his life, but, of all of them, the biggest wasn't betraying the CIA. It wasn't getting involved in the Alliance. It wasn't even killing Emily and Danny. No, the biggest mistake Sloane had ever made was giving her three days and two nights alone with Michael Vaughn. That was all it took to refocus and redouble her energy towards destroying SD-6. Sloane would never know that Sydney's long weekend was the beginning of his end.
Fin.