Behind closed doors
II
White walls and Vampire spirits
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * Written by Kiit Marlowe. Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. If they did d'you think I'd be writing fanfiction? Nah, I'd be doing a Mimi and shopping..... (Yup, this is my standard disclaimer now. I really can't be bothered to think of another one.) I don't really know how this one'll turn out. I'm kinda depressed as the guy I've had a massive crush on for over two years has finally got himself a girlfriend. Needless to say, she isn't me. Grrrrrrrrrr. If I had courage I might have asked him out. But then again, he "values my friendship and opinions". Arrogant, patronising, jackass. But I do feel like a bit of fluffy sap. So you never know what'll happen.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Yamato's room is cool. There's no two ways about it. Mattress on the floor, Bass guitar on it's stand, scattered books, pile of clothes, a mirror and nothing much else. It's almost as though he expects to be moving on at any moment. I didn't know he'd taken on the whole nomadic thing. But then, I wake up after three hours every night to take my watch. An ingrained habit, not lessened by the six years that have passed. It's the walls that make it cool though. White, plain white. And over every square inch of it in Yamato's scrawling handwriting are quotes from films or famous people, lyrics and little sketches. Amazingly detailed. Like the flawless crest of friendship painted onto the black carpet with tipex. I guess the boy gets bored sometimes.
The door is the only part that seems out of place. Out of place in the room, not out of place in Yamato. He's a complete contradiction. It's a mass of photos. Wallpapered in photos. Artistically arranged, I'll give him that, but still, it's a very teen girl kinda thing to do. I think Hikari took most of them. Memories every one. Smiling, happy friends. There's even the one I hate of myself. She won a prize for it in some contest; she sent it in accidentally and I refused to let her give out copies. It was taken straight after our cat died. It's a stupid photo. I look like such a three year old in it. I can't think where he got it, but it wasn't something I liked being displayed. I looked....well vulnerable. I don't like people seeing it after the event.
Yamato himself was lounging back on the mattress as I stared at the photo, English notes spread across his thighs. It's amazing how skinny he is still. Not in a bad way. Like a willow branch, all...well.....tree-like I guess. I had to chuckle at that. Even when I talk to myself I can't do description. The sapphire eyes watched me in wry amusement.
"Cracking up are we Taichi?" I ignored the comment. He observed me from his position, feline and unblinking. Then he smiled. I tell you, the guy was asking for it.
I pounced and mussed up the perfect golden hair. Perfect, not in a slushy sense, but in that not a strand was out of place. Well, it had been perfect until I got to it.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
I could kill him. I really could. It takes me ages to get my hair looking just right and the damn boy can ruin it in seconds. Still, least he wasn't punching me at this second.
"Going a bit femme, aren't we Yama-chan?" I glared. Okay, it was getting longer, but I liked it. And I couldn't really argue, not with my black nails inviting comment. On the positive side, I hadn't put on any kohl today. Should've done. Makes my eyes look bigger. Oh brother. I'm turning into Mimi.
I was about to struggle when I saw the pointlessness of the situation. Okay, so we're both seventeen, but he's well, just a tad buffer than I am. Natural physic. He's more built than I am. And he's a little bit stronger than I am now. Though I'm not going to admit that. I think it's down to the fact that he's a hotshot soccer player and I play sports.....hmm, never springs to mind. Oh, if I had the adrenaline pulsing through my veins, boy would he feel it. However, stopping him at this point would've been fighting a losing battle.
I gave up and let him finish with the hair. I think he must've felt a little guilty because he toned down from rough and purely messing up the style to a gentler teasing of my hair. Relaxing really. I like my hair being fussed. Okay, so I'm a completely vain individual. I don't care any more.
I flicked on the CD player and returned to the matter at hand. Stupid debate. I adore Anne Rice, but we have such complete bakas in the class. I started to outline our argument.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
I leant up against the head rest and twisted Yamato's tawny hair round my fingers. He was reading out points in a drowsy voice. I swear, the way to soften him is through his yellow mane. He's this big cat sometimes. You could almost hear him purr. I suppose it's weird; best friends and all, but sometimes he gets so damn uptight that its the only way to calm him right down. Bit like a massage. The colour of sand. Soft and silky, every bit as fine as it looks. Nice to run through your fingers. I shifted him a little so that I could see the notes.
"So, we have to argue what exactly?" I asked. He tilted his head back to look up at me. Indigo locked onto my own brown eyes.
"'That Armand is a willing participant and that it is not purely Marius leading him astray.' 'Bout as clear as mud."
"So we just blag it, right?" He considered it for a second, wrinkling up his nose in deep thought. It's really hard not to laugh sometimes.
"Nah, we have all these notes Tai. We just have to argue it. It'll be easy. Are you laughing at me?" He looked a little pissed.
"No, I was just thinking that'd we should be experts at arguing with the practice we get." He smiled his smile. No other way to describe it. You could trace that smile with your fingertips and still know it belonged to him. The smile that was becoming more frequent but no less special. I wish I could draw. I'd draw his smile. Takeru can draw. They're both artistic. Hikari says that it's a complete turn on. Keru has been drawing Yamato for his GCSE art project. Combining him with Angemon. Its a weird combo actually. Hikari and Takeru are dating officially now. Can't walk in the kitchen without seeing them sticking their tongues down each other's throats.
"Uh, that actually kinda hurts..." I realised I was tugging on strands. Hard. Must've been subconciously taking out my annoyance with them getting more action than me on him.
"Sorry Yama-chan." I doubled the attention on the hair, stroking it gently from root to tip. Yamato's eyes flickered shut.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
God, I was in absolute heaven. I could have laid there all day having my hair caressed. I felt my eyes closing and my whole body yielding to the soft touch.
I snuggled closer...Oh shit. It was Taichi for crying out loud. Dammit, he was the one stroking you. Your best friend. I sat bolt upright, stunned out of my happy little bubble. I'd gotten far too immersed in the physical feeling of it.
Dammit, dammit, dammit.
You complete baka, I cursed myself. I shouldn't give in to physical contact. Never had it as a kid. Shouldn't need it. I don't want it, not since last time. Not since Jun jumped me. She didn't touch my hair. Didn't touch much up from the waist actually. Bet she plays soccer in her spare time; hobby away from full time vulturing.
"Yama...?" I'm an idiot. What does he think of you now? Bloody cat, that's what I am. Stupid, stupid, stupid. You don't 'snuggle' into your male friends.
Taichi sat up, chocolate eyes troubled and full of worry. "Hey, calm down. You've gone all tense again." I tried to interupt. "I know, I know, you just panicked cause you were letting go a little. Cool it man." He slipped an arm round my waist. I felt myself being drawn back into a hug. I knew I was crying, and I knew he knew why. I had been in rumours all around school after Jun. Hadn't confirmed or denied anything. Hadn't wanted to think about it actually. Not that she actually did anything of importance; I just felt dirty.
I could feel the hands stroking my hair again, as if this was the only way he could ever pacify me. And the fingertips stroking down my cheekbones, wiping away the tears. I stopped shaking, stopped being as weak as a kitten and was disentangling myself from him when I realised his lips had just touched my hair.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
I could kill Jun. I may well do it sometime. It had made him introspective again. Quietened him somehow. Put the walls back up in his eyes. I couldn't believe that my strong friend, the guy who I could fight with knowing he'd match fire with fire could be this affected by.. well, I never knew exactly what happened. He fell into my arms and I could comfort him. Huh, me being of comfort. Holding a golden weeping angel in my arms and knowing that I'm actually helping for once. Not ruining his life, or giving him a black eye, but repaying his friendship. He recovered himself and was moving away. I kissed the back of his head as he did so. My mother had always done that to me when I'd been upset.
Bad move. I knew as soon as I'd done it. Wide, blue, bambi eyes stared at me in shock. I couldn't break contact. I guess I must've looked just as shocked as he was, because it was then that the lightbulb clicked on above my head.
I wanted him.
I wanted to kiss him. I wanted to kiss those perfect lips, to run my tongue along that perfect smile, to linger over those sharp cheekbones and to drown myself in his wonderous eyes.
I wanted to kiss him, so I did.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
OhmiGod
OhmiGod.
OhmiGod.
OhmiGod.
Taichi Kamiya is kissing me. Don't get me wrong, he's my best friend and all, but I'm dreaming. Taichi is kissing me. Soft and tentitive at first, but then with more ardour and energy.
OhmiGod.
OhmiGod.
OhmiGod.
OhmiGod.
He tasted exactly how I would have imagined he would. His tongue was just as demanding as I could ever suppose. Hand in exactly the right postion to cup the back of my head, the other arm still tightly snaked around my waist. I could feel tingling blots of electricity jangling up my spine where we touched. God, he kissed well. I didn't ever want to have to stop.
OhmiGod.
OhmiGod.
OhmiGod.
OhmiGod.
We ended up lying on my bed, stretched out so that every possible point was in contact. He was on top; I don't think he'd have it any other way. I gazed up at him.
Complete heaven.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
He didn't expect it, that's for certain. But, judging by the response from his mouth and his eagerness to entwine his arms around my neck, I didn't think he had many objections. When we finally paused for air, the complete trust plastered across his face almost made me wish we were over eighteen.
"Tai!" Okay, so I'm as transparent as glass. He gazed at me in this gorgeously cute way that made me want to kiss him all over again. So I did. But just quickly. Without bothering to hide the satisfied look skittering across his features he remarked, "So."
"So. I guess this changes things a little, huh?"
"Huh. I guess."
"Is this the moment where I 'officially' ask you out? Or is that too J17 ish?"
He considered. "Whatever." Was the only reply, and he tightened his hold on me. "What are you going to tell your parents?"
"I hadn't thought about that. Break it to them gently, I guess."
A contented silence fell. Yamato peppered kisses on my face in that complete grace he has. My feline angel. Strange image huh?
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
My Dad chose that point to walk in. And walk straight back out again. He's cool with my 'orientation'. He should be. He is Bi. Teeks and Hikari spent a little longer gawking at their elder brothers wrapped up in a deep clinch before Dad hustled them off.
Taichi kissed me again, deep and tenderly. "Feel like getting to this debate thing then?" He slid off of me and helped me to my feet.
"Not really." He chuckled and ruffled my hair. "Oh, Damn! I'm never going to be able to restyle it in time for school!"
"Who were you trying to impress?" He asks, laughter in his eyes.
"You, baka. I guess it'll be alright. It's seen enough excitement for one day." And it played a vital part in getting me and my Taichi together. I snagged an eyeliner off the floor and handed it to Tai.
"Uh uh. I don't do kohl. None of your weird kinks Yama." He winced as I elbowed him in the gut. "Not that it doesn't look gorgeous on you..."
"Flattery will get you everywhere. No, write on the wall." He smiled at me and wrote in neat letters above my bed the highly original legend: 'Taichi's Yamato'. Then he added 'Armand was entirely willing.' That was better.
"One final kiss before school then, Armand?" He asked. I think he just called me an angel. I don't know whether to be annoyed or pleased, but he's not really giving me much time to think. And I'm not complaining.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * Yay! Happy, happy, sap! I feel better now! Feedback or flames (They both amuse me) to Kiit_Marlowe@Yahoo.com, and keep me writing through this difficult period in my life. (All donations greatly accepted).
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * Written by Kiit Marlowe. Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. If they did d'you think I'd be writing fanfiction? Nah, I'd be doing a Mimi and shopping..... (Yup, this is my standard disclaimer now. I really can't be bothered to think of another one.) I don't really know how this one'll turn out. I'm kinda depressed as the guy I've had a massive crush on for over two years has finally got himself a girlfriend. Needless to say, she isn't me. Grrrrrrrrrr. If I had courage I might have asked him out. But then again, he "values my friendship and opinions". Arrogant, patronising, jackass. But I do feel like a bit of fluffy sap. So you never know what'll happen.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Yamato's room is cool. There's no two ways about it. Mattress on the floor, Bass guitar on it's stand, scattered books, pile of clothes, a mirror and nothing much else. It's almost as though he expects to be moving on at any moment. I didn't know he'd taken on the whole nomadic thing. But then, I wake up after three hours every night to take my watch. An ingrained habit, not lessened by the six years that have passed. It's the walls that make it cool though. White, plain white. And over every square inch of it in Yamato's scrawling handwriting are quotes from films or famous people, lyrics and little sketches. Amazingly detailed. Like the flawless crest of friendship painted onto the black carpet with tipex. I guess the boy gets bored sometimes.
The door is the only part that seems out of place. Out of place in the room, not out of place in Yamato. He's a complete contradiction. It's a mass of photos. Wallpapered in photos. Artistically arranged, I'll give him that, but still, it's a very teen girl kinda thing to do. I think Hikari took most of them. Memories every one. Smiling, happy friends. There's even the one I hate of myself. She won a prize for it in some contest; she sent it in accidentally and I refused to let her give out copies. It was taken straight after our cat died. It's a stupid photo. I look like such a three year old in it. I can't think where he got it, but it wasn't something I liked being displayed. I looked....well vulnerable. I don't like people seeing it after the event.
Yamato himself was lounging back on the mattress as I stared at the photo, English notes spread across his thighs. It's amazing how skinny he is still. Not in a bad way. Like a willow branch, all...well.....tree-like I guess. I had to chuckle at that. Even when I talk to myself I can't do description. The sapphire eyes watched me in wry amusement.
"Cracking up are we Taichi?" I ignored the comment. He observed me from his position, feline and unblinking. Then he smiled. I tell you, the guy was asking for it.
I pounced and mussed up the perfect golden hair. Perfect, not in a slushy sense, but in that not a strand was out of place. Well, it had been perfect until I got to it.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
I could kill him. I really could. It takes me ages to get my hair looking just right and the damn boy can ruin it in seconds. Still, least he wasn't punching me at this second.
"Going a bit femme, aren't we Yama-chan?" I glared. Okay, it was getting longer, but I liked it. And I couldn't really argue, not with my black nails inviting comment. On the positive side, I hadn't put on any kohl today. Should've done. Makes my eyes look bigger. Oh brother. I'm turning into Mimi.
I was about to struggle when I saw the pointlessness of the situation. Okay, so we're both seventeen, but he's well, just a tad buffer than I am. Natural physic. He's more built than I am. And he's a little bit stronger than I am now. Though I'm not going to admit that. I think it's down to the fact that he's a hotshot soccer player and I play sports.....hmm, never springs to mind. Oh, if I had the adrenaline pulsing through my veins, boy would he feel it. However, stopping him at this point would've been fighting a losing battle.
I gave up and let him finish with the hair. I think he must've felt a little guilty because he toned down from rough and purely messing up the style to a gentler teasing of my hair. Relaxing really. I like my hair being fussed. Okay, so I'm a completely vain individual. I don't care any more.
I flicked on the CD player and returned to the matter at hand. Stupid debate. I adore Anne Rice, but we have such complete bakas in the class. I started to outline our argument.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
I leant up against the head rest and twisted Yamato's tawny hair round my fingers. He was reading out points in a drowsy voice. I swear, the way to soften him is through his yellow mane. He's this big cat sometimes. You could almost hear him purr. I suppose it's weird; best friends and all, but sometimes he gets so damn uptight that its the only way to calm him right down. Bit like a massage. The colour of sand. Soft and silky, every bit as fine as it looks. Nice to run through your fingers. I shifted him a little so that I could see the notes.
"So, we have to argue what exactly?" I asked. He tilted his head back to look up at me. Indigo locked onto my own brown eyes.
"'That Armand is a willing participant and that it is not purely Marius leading him astray.' 'Bout as clear as mud."
"So we just blag it, right?" He considered it for a second, wrinkling up his nose in deep thought. It's really hard not to laugh sometimes.
"Nah, we have all these notes Tai. We just have to argue it. It'll be easy. Are you laughing at me?" He looked a little pissed.
"No, I was just thinking that'd we should be experts at arguing with the practice we get." He smiled his smile. No other way to describe it. You could trace that smile with your fingertips and still know it belonged to him. The smile that was becoming more frequent but no less special. I wish I could draw. I'd draw his smile. Takeru can draw. They're both artistic. Hikari says that it's a complete turn on. Keru has been drawing Yamato for his GCSE art project. Combining him with Angemon. Its a weird combo actually. Hikari and Takeru are dating officially now. Can't walk in the kitchen without seeing them sticking their tongues down each other's throats.
"Uh, that actually kinda hurts..." I realised I was tugging on strands. Hard. Must've been subconciously taking out my annoyance with them getting more action than me on him.
"Sorry Yama-chan." I doubled the attention on the hair, stroking it gently from root to tip. Yamato's eyes flickered shut.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
God, I was in absolute heaven. I could have laid there all day having my hair caressed. I felt my eyes closing and my whole body yielding to the soft touch.
I snuggled closer...Oh shit. It was Taichi for crying out loud. Dammit, he was the one stroking you. Your best friend. I sat bolt upright, stunned out of my happy little bubble. I'd gotten far too immersed in the physical feeling of it.
Dammit, dammit, dammit.
You complete baka, I cursed myself. I shouldn't give in to physical contact. Never had it as a kid. Shouldn't need it. I don't want it, not since last time. Not since Jun jumped me. She didn't touch my hair. Didn't touch much up from the waist actually. Bet she plays soccer in her spare time; hobby away from full time vulturing.
"Yama...?" I'm an idiot. What does he think of you now? Bloody cat, that's what I am. Stupid, stupid, stupid. You don't 'snuggle' into your male friends.
Taichi sat up, chocolate eyes troubled and full of worry. "Hey, calm down. You've gone all tense again." I tried to interupt. "I know, I know, you just panicked cause you were letting go a little. Cool it man." He slipped an arm round my waist. I felt myself being drawn back into a hug. I knew I was crying, and I knew he knew why. I had been in rumours all around school after Jun. Hadn't confirmed or denied anything. Hadn't wanted to think about it actually. Not that she actually did anything of importance; I just felt dirty.
I could feel the hands stroking my hair again, as if this was the only way he could ever pacify me. And the fingertips stroking down my cheekbones, wiping away the tears. I stopped shaking, stopped being as weak as a kitten and was disentangling myself from him when I realised his lips had just touched my hair.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
I could kill Jun. I may well do it sometime. It had made him introspective again. Quietened him somehow. Put the walls back up in his eyes. I couldn't believe that my strong friend, the guy who I could fight with knowing he'd match fire with fire could be this affected by.. well, I never knew exactly what happened. He fell into my arms and I could comfort him. Huh, me being of comfort. Holding a golden weeping angel in my arms and knowing that I'm actually helping for once. Not ruining his life, or giving him a black eye, but repaying his friendship. He recovered himself and was moving away. I kissed the back of his head as he did so. My mother had always done that to me when I'd been upset.
Bad move. I knew as soon as I'd done it. Wide, blue, bambi eyes stared at me in shock. I couldn't break contact. I guess I must've looked just as shocked as he was, because it was then that the lightbulb clicked on above my head.
I wanted him.
I wanted to kiss him. I wanted to kiss those perfect lips, to run my tongue along that perfect smile, to linger over those sharp cheekbones and to drown myself in his wonderous eyes.
I wanted to kiss him, so I did.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
OhmiGod
OhmiGod.
OhmiGod.
OhmiGod.
Taichi Kamiya is kissing me. Don't get me wrong, he's my best friend and all, but I'm dreaming. Taichi is kissing me. Soft and tentitive at first, but then with more ardour and energy.
OhmiGod.
OhmiGod.
OhmiGod.
OhmiGod.
He tasted exactly how I would have imagined he would. His tongue was just as demanding as I could ever suppose. Hand in exactly the right postion to cup the back of my head, the other arm still tightly snaked around my waist. I could feel tingling blots of electricity jangling up my spine where we touched. God, he kissed well. I didn't ever want to have to stop.
OhmiGod.
OhmiGod.
OhmiGod.
OhmiGod.
We ended up lying on my bed, stretched out so that every possible point was in contact. He was on top; I don't think he'd have it any other way. I gazed up at him.
Complete heaven.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
He didn't expect it, that's for certain. But, judging by the response from his mouth and his eagerness to entwine his arms around my neck, I didn't think he had many objections. When we finally paused for air, the complete trust plastered across his face almost made me wish we were over eighteen.
"Tai!" Okay, so I'm as transparent as glass. He gazed at me in this gorgeously cute way that made me want to kiss him all over again. So I did. But just quickly. Without bothering to hide the satisfied look skittering across his features he remarked, "So."
"So. I guess this changes things a little, huh?"
"Huh. I guess."
"Is this the moment where I 'officially' ask you out? Or is that too J17 ish?"
He considered. "Whatever." Was the only reply, and he tightened his hold on me. "What are you going to tell your parents?"
"I hadn't thought about that. Break it to them gently, I guess."
A contented silence fell. Yamato peppered kisses on my face in that complete grace he has. My feline angel. Strange image huh?
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
My Dad chose that point to walk in. And walk straight back out again. He's cool with my 'orientation'. He should be. He is Bi. Teeks and Hikari spent a little longer gawking at their elder brothers wrapped up in a deep clinch before Dad hustled them off.
Taichi kissed me again, deep and tenderly. "Feel like getting to this debate thing then?" He slid off of me and helped me to my feet.
"Not really." He chuckled and ruffled my hair. "Oh, Damn! I'm never going to be able to restyle it in time for school!"
"Who were you trying to impress?" He asks, laughter in his eyes.
"You, baka. I guess it'll be alright. It's seen enough excitement for one day." And it played a vital part in getting me and my Taichi together. I snagged an eyeliner off the floor and handed it to Tai.
"Uh uh. I don't do kohl. None of your weird kinks Yama." He winced as I elbowed him in the gut. "Not that it doesn't look gorgeous on you..."
"Flattery will get you everywhere. No, write on the wall." He smiled at me and wrote in neat letters above my bed the highly original legend: 'Taichi's Yamato'. Then he added 'Armand was entirely willing.' That was better.
"One final kiss before school then, Armand?" He asked. I think he just called me an angel. I don't know whether to be annoyed or pleased, but he's not really giving me much time to think. And I'm not complaining.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * Yay! Happy, happy, sap! I feel better now! Feedback or flames (They both amuse me) to Kiit_Marlowe@Yahoo.com, and keep me writing through this difficult period in my life. (All donations greatly accepted).