CHAPTER 3: I'll Be Fine Without These Bones
Since the earth (well, at least my earth) was rotating quite strangely and off-kilter lately, I spent the day following The Surprising Confrontation staring mindlessly at the television in my empty living room and daydreaming about Jacob. Jacob Willoughby was the love of my life, or so I described him when Miranda and Lizzie weren't hovering about, trying to pry into my crushes like they did each other's. I wasn't exactly dating him.. Actually, I wasn't doing much except being his lab partner in Science I. However, he was nearly perfect in every way. Perfect Jacob was tall (good, as I am a midget), charismatic, friendly, hot, almost as smart as I, punctual, and perhaps gay (I hadn't determined whether he was actually straight or just hiding his true sexuality and mad love for me). Perfect Jacob always wore the puka shell bracelet I gave him for his birthday and called me Zephyr (the infamous middle name). In my daydream, Perfect Jacob and I had run away together after an off day as lab partners in the upcoming Science II. To Spain.
'Would be great if could speak Spanish,' I thought. Apparently I had been reading too much Bridget Jones, as I was thinking exactly like she wrote diary entries. 'Suppose am lot like Bridget. Am single and fawning over stupid men.' At least I wasn't smoking and counting calories. Yet. I might start drinking like a fish, though, if drama with Lizzie didn't slow up for at least a little while. I hadn't spoken to her since the night before, but I needed to catch my breath and think about something else, like Perfect Jacob. I was finding, though, that it was hard to concentrate on Spain with Perfect Jacob with the TV on. I felt quite lazy. 'Must be other exciting lands to explore that don't involve hitchhiking.' So I locked the door after me, not changing out of my pajamas of grey cut-off sweatpants and Lucky Charms shirt, and headed into a more populated area.
I was buying a newspaper and ordering a mocha at the Digital Bean when someone called my name.
"Gordo! Heeeey, Gordo!" I turned around to Miranda waving and grinning. I nodded but couldn't wave as it is quite dangerous to wave with large cup full of very hot liquid.
"Hey, Miranda," I replied, sitting at a table for four while she sat across from me. "What are you doing all by your lonesome?"
"I could ask the same of you," she responded.
"It's not exactly abnormal for me to be alone." I raised my eyebrows at her. "Are you Miss Cleo in disguise, knowing I would come at exactly this time?" I mockingly accused her.
Still smiling, she looked at her watch and fiddled with the yellow buttons on her shirt. There was a pause. "I'm meeting my boyfriend here," she said, and smiled even bigger.
'If surprises do not stop coming, am going to explode or turn into giant eggplant,' I thought negatively.
"What are you talking about here? Who? When? I'm so confused!" I cried, keeping my yucky thoughts to myself. I took a calming sip of my mocha. Mmmmmm. Mocha good. Mocha relaxing.
"I. Have. A. Boyfriend!" Miranda squealed, then more or less quickly regained her composure. "We always talked and flirted and stuff but he only asked me out yesterday, after you and Lizzie and I left the mall. And I won't tell you who.. It's a surprise," she explained and grinned widely.
"Why didn't you tell me?!" I said incredulously, my eyes the size of tennis balls. How did she keep this from me? Then it came to me. It MUST be Ethan.
"I just didn't want you to go and say that he's stupid or vapid or something," she responded. I guess she could tell I was a bit hurt at that comment, as she quickly added "No offense or anything! You know how you are.." Another smile.
"Is it Ethan?" I inquired.
"I'm not telling!" she teased. "Relax, he'll be here any minute."
"Did Lizzie know?"
"Nah. My little secret."
I sighed impatiently. This guy better get here soon or..
"Heeey, Zephyr!"
YES! YES YES YES! Oh God. I was wearing my pajamas. Oh God Oh God Oh God.
Perfect Jacob went on. "Chillin' with my girlfriend on this lovely afternoon?"
I blinked. Miranda grinned. I shattered into a trillion pieces. My ribs gave way, deciding not to protect my heart from plummeting to the ground. My Perfect Jacob kissed my best friend hello and stomped the pieces of my body to dust on the floor.
"Hey there, Jacob," I responded, somehow fully able to outwardly function while my remains were blowing across the linoleum. Perfect Jacob sat down at the table while Miranda kept smiling dumbly. He was wearing the bracelet. He called me Zephyr. He would never love me and would always love some girl and I would be the ashes in their fireplace.
I couldn't take it.
"Oh, shit, I didn't lock the front door. I should get home. Miranda, call me sometime," I said, smiling and making a quick getaway.
"Bye, Gordo!" Miranda the Lovebunny cooed. She was so happy.
"Seeya later, Zephyr! We should hit a movie sometime or something, man!" Oh God. I nodded as I quietly swept my remains out the door. The light wind picked up my dust and carried it to lands far and wide. I was dying.
It was nothing I couldn't handle, right?
Since the earth (well, at least my earth) was rotating quite strangely and off-kilter lately, I spent the day following The Surprising Confrontation staring mindlessly at the television in my empty living room and daydreaming about Jacob. Jacob Willoughby was the love of my life, or so I described him when Miranda and Lizzie weren't hovering about, trying to pry into my crushes like they did each other's. I wasn't exactly dating him.. Actually, I wasn't doing much except being his lab partner in Science I. However, he was nearly perfect in every way. Perfect Jacob was tall (good, as I am a midget), charismatic, friendly, hot, almost as smart as I, punctual, and perhaps gay (I hadn't determined whether he was actually straight or just hiding his true sexuality and mad love for me). Perfect Jacob always wore the puka shell bracelet I gave him for his birthday and called me Zephyr (the infamous middle name). In my daydream, Perfect Jacob and I had run away together after an off day as lab partners in the upcoming Science II. To Spain.
'Would be great if could speak Spanish,' I thought. Apparently I had been reading too much Bridget Jones, as I was thinking exactly like she wrote diary entries. 'Suppose am lot like Bridget. Am single and fawning over stupid men.' At least I wasn't smoking and counting calories. Yet. I might start drinking like a fish, though, if drama with Lizzie didn't slow up for at least a little while. I hadn't spoken to her since the night before, but I needed to catch my breath and think about something else, like Perfect Jacob. I was finding, though, that it was hard to concentrate on Spain with Perfect Jacob with the TV on. I felt quite lazy. 'Must be other exciting lands to explore that don't involve hitchhiking.' So I locked the door after me, not changing out of my pajamas of grey cut-off sweatpants and Lucky Charms shirt, and headed into a more populated area.
I was buying a newspaper and ordering a mocha at the Digital Bean when someone called my name.
"Gordo! Heeeey, Gordo!" I turned around to Miranda waving and grinning. I nodded but couldn't wave as it is quite dangerous to wave with large cup full of very hot liquid.
"Hey, Miranda," I replied, sitting at a table for four while she sat across from me. "What are you doing all by your lonesome?"
"I could ask the same of you," she responded.
"It's not exactly abnormal for me to be alone." I raised my eyebrows at her. "Are you Miss Cleo in disguise, knowing I would come at exactly this time?" I mockingly accused her.
Still smiling, she looked at her watch and fiddled with the yellow buttons on her shirt. There was a pause. "I'm meeting my boyfriend here," she said, and smiled even bigger.
'If surprises do not stop coming, am going to explode or turn into giant eggplant,' I thought negatively.
"What are you talking about here? Who? When? I'm so confused!" I cried, keeping my yucky thoughts to myself. I took a calming sip of my mocha. Mmmmmm. Mocha good. Mocha relaxing.
"I. Have. A. Boyfriend!" Miranda squealed, then more or less quickly regained her composure. "We always talked and flirted and stuff but he only asked me out yesterday, after you and Lizzie and I left the mall. And I won't tell you who.. It's a surprise," she explained and grinned widely.
"Why didn't you tell me?!" I said incredulously, my eyes the size of tennis balls. How did she keep this from me? Then it came to me. It MUST be Ethan.
"I just didn't want you to go and say that he's stupid or vapid or something," she responded. I guess she could tell I was a bit hurt at that comment, as she quickly added "No offense or anything! You know how you are.." Another smile.
"Is it Ethan?" I inquired.
"I'm not telling!" she teased. "Relax, he'll be here any minute."
"Did Lizzie know?"
"Nah. My little secret."
I sighed impatiently. This guy better get here soon or..
"Heeey, Zephyr!"
YES! YES YES YES! Oh God. I was wearing my pajamas. Oh God Oh God Oh God.
Perfect Jacob went on. "Chillin' with my girlfriend on this lovely afternoon?"
I blinked. Miranda grinned. I shattered into a trillion pieces. My ribs gave way, deciding not to protect my heart from plummeting to the ground. My Perfect Jacob kissed my best friend hello and stomped the pieces of my body to dust on the floor.
"Hey there, Jacob," I responded, somehow fully able to outwardly function while my remains were blowing across the linoleum. Perfect Jacob sat down at the table while Miranda kept smiling dumbly. He was wearing the bracelet. He called me Zephyr. He would never love me and would always love some girl and I would be the ashes in their fireplace.
I couldn't take it.
"Oh, shit, I didn't lock the front door. I should get home. Miranda, call me sometime," I said, smiling and making a quick getaway.
"Bye, Gordo!" Miranda the Lovebunny cooed. She was so happy.
"Seeya later, Zephyr! We should hit a movie sometime or something, man!" Oh God. I nodded as I quietly swept my remains out the door. The light wind picked up my dust and carried it to lands far and wide. I was dying.
It was nothing I couldn't handle, right?