Legolas giggled. "Wow. I didn't know he could get that loud. I mean, even the time he caught me sneaking pictures of Arwe- I mean, some girl- he didn't yell so much."

"What's he doing?" Merry asked as they watched Aragorn run out of the room. "Pip, go see what Strider is doing."

Pippin slipped out of the ceiling and came back within five minutes. "He's yelling that he's going to go get his sword and kill Mister Legolas."

Legolas turned pale. "Oh great. Now I've got this deranged ranger- king-whatever after me."

"You could have just said Boromir and you wouldn't be in this mess," Merry said sagely.

"I guess I'll go hide or something... either that or get my knife."

At that moment they heard another shriek pierce the valley. "I can't find my sword!" Aragorn was yelling.

"Hey Pip," Merry said, "do you suppose that broken sword we found belonged to Strider?"

"You have Aragorn's sword?" Legolas asked urgently.

"No... we put it... um... Pip, when did we put the sword?"

"The one we were playing pirates with?"

"Yeah."

"I dunno. I thought you had it."

"No. I gave it to you."

"Oh."

Legolas looked at the hobbits very seriously. "You two lost Aragorn's sword?"

"Um..." "Ah..."

"Wonderful. So apparently you two don't know that Aragorn has a very special, intimate relationship with his sword. And he goes to check on it quite often. I can't believe he doesn't know yet."

Merry and Pippin looked at each other. "You mean, intimate like with Arwen?" Pippin asked. Merry slapped him.

Legolas had a strange, pained look on his face as he replied. "No... not an intimate relationship like with Arwen. That's a physical intimate relationship. I was talking about a mental relationship."

"You mean he thinks like a sword?"

"Pip?"

"Yes Merry?"

"Shuttup."

"Yes Merry."

Legolas left the two of them in the ceiling above Aragorn's room and went to go look around. What he found both amused and horrified him...

Aragorn was running around looking for his sword as a crowd of onlooking Elves watched curiously. Fortunately for him, the man did not see Legolas, nor could he find his sword. Legolas breathed a sigh of relief and turned to go hide until the situation had quite calmed down.

"Hey, Aragorn!" a voice called from behind him. Legolas looked around and down, to see Gimli next to him yelling. "Legolas is right here!" he said.

Legolas made a sort of strangled-gasping sound and tried to muffle the dwarf, but it was too late. The dwarf threw up his axe, and the approaching Ranger caught it nicely.

There was obviously only one thing to do. Legolas shrieked and ran off, with Aragorn at his heels. In the distance, he could hear Gimli shouting, "That's for sending a pair of riding hobbits after me!"

~~ ~~~ ~~ ~~~ ~~ ~~~ ~~

Legolas followed a zigzagging path, trying to shake off Aragorn. It was no use. Finally, the elf made one last desperate leap and landed in the branches of an old oak tree that was right above a waterfall.

Aragorn got to the base of the tree and wildly started hacking at it with the axe, while Legolas hung on for dear life. Suddenly, the man threw down the axe and started weeping wildly.

"What's he doing?" a voice asked from above Legolas. The Elf looked up to see Merry and Pippin in the branches above him.

"How in the world did you two get up here?"

"We hobbits have our ways," Pippin said. "Now, I'll ask again. What's he doing?"

"I think he needs a shrink," Merry commented.

"Yeah, sure," Legolas said. "If we get out of this alive, I'll take him to see Elrond or something."

The branches above him rustled. Merry and Pippin were coming down. "We're going to try to talk to him," Pippin said.

"No!" Legolas exclaimed. He was genuinely fond of the silly little hobbits. "You'll get killed." He grabbed hold of their arms.

"Let go," Merry said. "We know what we're doing. Sam gets like this sometimes."

From below, they could hear the strains of a voice.

"I'll kill myself!"

"No I won't."

"But Arwen doesn't love me anymore!"

"I don't care."

"I do!"

"Oh fine. Go at it then."

"Give me the axe."

"Oh no!" Legolas said. "If he keeps on it like this, Gondor will have Boromir as a king!"

"Then let us down," Pippin said. He knocked Legolas off the branch and continued down.

Now, ordinarily, Legolas would have no problem in getting back on. At the moment, however, he was confronted by a suicidal king, two bothersome hobbits, and a whole lot of guilt. Therefore, he didn't catch hold of the next branch.

He fell, landing nicely on Aragorn and knocking the axe out of the man's grasp. And knocking the two of them off the base of the tree and into the waterfall.

Merry and Pippin watched as the two disappeared behind a cloud of water. "Oh Pip," Merry said, "now look what you've done."