The camera pans over the new cast and Drew takes a sip of his coffee

Muchos thanks to Akisis for letting me use you in my fic ( geez I know a lotta fanfic authors don't I?)

And to Momo Claus: LIFEHOUSE WILL BE APPEARING IN THE NINTH CHAPTER!!!

Thank you.

The camera pans over the new cast and Drew takes a sip of his coffee.

"And we're back to Whose Line is it Anyway where everything's made up and the points don't matter. As you can see we have a new panel." The audience claps and they wave.

"And last time I saw Ryan, Colin and Chip they were sneaking out the conveniently dark wings…" A few whistles and hoots erupt form the audience.

"That tells you something about where we get these guys. Anyway, onto our next game which is Super-Heroes! This is for all four of you…" the guys get up Greg stands center while the others stand in the wings.

"Okay if you've never seen this game, Greg will be a wacky super-hero who has to save the world from some crisis. Each of the guys will come in and the person before them has to screw them up by giving them some insane super-hero identity. What's a name for this particular super-hero?" Drew turns to the audience.

"Super Server Man!"

"Tofu Tyrant!"

"The Review Dog!"

"Deado Rachel!" Drew considers these.

"I think we'll go with The Review Dog because it's kinda strange. And what problem is there in the world?"

"Spamming!" Someone shouts. (thanx SuperHurricane)

"Okay, Review Dog! There's Spamming all over the net! What are you going to do?!" Greg starts sniffing around.

"Are you reviewing twice? Ehhehee! ACESS DENIED!" (!@%!^@ review dog…..). He growls and paces towards the left. His nose crinkles in revulsion.

"What's that? If I didn't know better I'd say that's the foul stench of spamming! And it seems to abound! Looks like I'll have to call upon my super hero friends." He leans back.

"AROOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" he lets loose a howl. Suddenly, Toomin bounds in.

"I got here as quick as I could!"

"Oh thank God! It's the Anti-Ghost Writer kid!" Toomin stands up straight.

"That's right!" He mimics pulling a hood down over his face. He pulls out an imaginary gun and cocks it.

"Now, off to KAA's house!" he hunches over and begins to sneak around the set. He comes back the other way around with an imaginary device out.

"Beep, beep, beep….." he chirps. He comes over the audience and starts looking.

"Beep, beepbeepbeepbeep!" He settles on a women with shoulder-length dark hair.

"AHA! An impostor! You think you're the real deal don't you? Well you're not fooling me!" He cocks his gun and shoots her. Then goes about searching for more KAA look alikes.

"I rushed right over as soon as I heard!" Brad runs in. Toomin looks up from his massacre.

"Well whadaya know! It's Slash Fic Guy!" an eruption of laughter. Brad starts to look goofy.

"Oh yes! You two would be great together!" He yanks Toomin and Greg together.

"Yeah…." He then goes into the audience and searches. He pulls Taylor and Tobias out.

"Oh! That look so unbelievably far out….." but then he shakes his head. He goes looking into the audience and finds Senna. Dragging her along she pulls out Edriss.

"Ah, two evil, devious minds. It's a love hate, you'll-all-be-dead-at- any-rate kinda thing! Not to mention lesbian!" he laughs and then dismisses them. He goes on and pulls out Jade. She then searches around as the chocobo screeches. He then selects a Hork-Bajir.

"Hmmmm….not really that wrong. Well there must be somebody….a couple that would be so appallingly abominable and gay…." Brad taps his chin and scans the audience. He then spots Drew.

"Oh! Oh! OH! IDEA!" He yanks Ax over who stumbles in his human form. He sets him right by Drew and rejoices.

"Oh! The gayness! The utter awkwardness ! It's so beauty and the beast!" Toomin comes up and aims the gun at Brad.

"KAA would never make people be gay! Tobias would never date Taylor, Senna isn't even from the right series and Ax isn't that stupid or drunk enough to date Drew Carey YOU STINKIN' GHOST WRITERS!!!" He riddles Brad with bullets. Wayne leaps onto the scene.

"Did I get here in time?" he asks.

"Oh look! It's Sir Server Breaks a Lot!" Brad says in a strained voice. Wayne begins twisting his steps and beeping haphazardly. He does a jerky robot-like dance. He then flips and tumbles again. He scuttles over to Greg, his face contorting and his head rolling.

"You n-n-need to! TO! Stop doing it. Follow goddman policy rules for once! If you're gonna upload a damn fic do it in w-w-w-one category! You're the source of the problem! And if the others keep doing it, just sm-m-m-mash the server at fanfiction.net." he then hops on one foot and cartwheels out. Brad staggers in.

"Uh, I have stuff to write….." he then looks back into the audience.

"You know, maybe Harry Potter with Visser Three huh? Eh?" he then collapses off stage. Toomin flies in and crouches low.

"I sense someone at KAA's computer." His eyes shift rapidly and he jumps off-stage. Greg stands center with his hands on his hips.

"Well, it looks like another crisis averted! AROOOOOOOO!" he howls.

BZZZZZZZZZ! Greg and the others go back to their seats. He takes a long sip from his glass.

"Okay a billion points to Greg for wrecking his voice. And a point to each person who had to envision Brad's gay fantasies." Brad laughs and covers his head.

"Not any worse than what you do on your own show." He laughs. The audience takes that with a few laughs and an 'oooooooo'.

"At least I have a show. Come back to me when there's a Brad Sherwood Show." The audience members laugh and clap. Drew shakes his head vigorously a lifts up another card.

"Okay and your next game is…."

Meanwhile Backstage…

"Why do you want to help us?" Ryan asks.

"Are you powerful?" Colin asks as well. The fanfic author takes a seat and motions them to do the same.

"This might be shocking." She turns to Ryan. " To you especially." Ryan frowns.

"Let me introduce myself. I am Akisis. I know Lenalaye and she isn't just doing this for fun alone. She has a serious purpose." Akisis pauses and lets the words sink in.

"You see in fanficdom, when one has written a certain number of fics and gained a certain amount of notability, they achieve the power and rank of Great One."

"Great One?" Colin echoes.

"Yes. It happens around fifty or so, and this will be her crowning fic. She will be unstoppable at your level." Ryan bows his head and Chip sighs.

"So she's about to become so powerful, she can use us whenever we want?" Chip asks.

"Yes, and more will want her to. You need to cap her now or you will never lead normal lives again…" she drifts.

"What do we do?" Ryan asks.

"Is there anything we can do?" Colin says. Akisis stays quiet for a moment and then begins again.

"A fanfic author can only be overcome by an equal. Someone with the same amount of fics and ability. Another Great One I suppose."

"So we get another Great One and convince him to rival her." Colin reasons.

"It's not that simple. Some of them she's acquaintances with. They're also powerful, I have no such authority. Most don't and most don't care to. But it doesn't matter because I've already found one." They all breath a sigh of relief except Ryan who's waiting for where he comes in.

"Who?" he asks. Akisis inhales and sighs deeply.

"Ryan…." She leaves them in mystery. They all turn to him, bewildered.

"You're a fanfic author and you never told us?!" Colin yells.

"I….I…" Ryan stammers.

"Ryan is part fanfic writer, yes. He was never meant to know though…" she reclaims their attention.

"Are you going to tell a long story about Ryan's parents and how one of them gave up fanfic to be human and how he has to take up where they left off and save the day?" Chip asks.

"Yeah I guess. Maybe only a paragraph or two. Your mother, Ryan was a fanfic author. Her name was Trillian, after the character in the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy stories."

"Awesome books." Chip nods.

"Anyway, she was very well respected and wrote some seventy-five fics. She eventually grew out of it, I guess. Then she met your father and well, ya know. But she never erased her account. You might be able to access it, and with it the same power she had. Which is more than enough to take Lenalaye down." Ryan tries to grip what she's saying.

"You lie, if I were a fanfic author then all the weird stuff I write at home would come true!"

"Not so Ryan. Remember last time when you were able to sense Lenalaye? You alone were able to overcome her meddling and discover her hideout. The reason the stuff you write in your free time has no effect on the world is because your power lies dormant. It will awaken once you log in. It all depends on you…." Ryan nods very slowly and considers this.

"You're our only hope man…." Chip says.

"Think about it Ryan! Revenge on that little punk!" Colin also encourages. Ryan sits in thought and after a while he replies,

"What do I have to do?" Akisis smiles.

Onstage…..

"…… 'Theme Restaurant' and this is for all four of you…" The audience cheers and Greg, Wayne, Brad and Toomin get up.

" Wayne and Greg will be two high powered executives out to lunch in a restaurant with a theme. The theme is a Yeerk Pool. Toomin and Brad will be the waiters. When you're ready begin." Wayne and Greg sit in the chairs facing a checker topped table.

"All right my boss says the least I can give it to you for is twelve hundred." Wayne starts out.

"You drive a hard bargain there Wayne, but I might ask that you slip in a few bonds in as well." Greg says.

"Met-Life?"

"Or of the same quality."

"Sounds good Greg. We'll close the deal after lunch. Say, where are those waiters anyway?"

"Garcin?" Greg calls.

"AHHH, AHHH, AHHH!" Brad is dragged by Toomin kicking and screaming. Toomin yanks out a pitcher and pours them drinks.

"NOOOOOOO!" Brad yells as Toomin pulls him away, clinging desperately to the table cloth. Greg blinks.

"Uh….yeah….anyway, about those bonds…" he starts.

"Yeaaaaaaaaaaahhhhaaaaa!" Brad tears by flailing his hands. Toomin runs after him and bashes him over the head with a tray. He then sets it down on the table.

"Escargo?" Wayne picks up a hors d'oeuvre. Toomin walks by.

" What! Are you doing here?" he says with a patient anger.

"Uh, we're having lunch…" Wayne says confused.

"Lunch?! When the bandits are attacking?! What is your name and number?" he persecutes further.

" I'm not giving you my number!" Wayne says disgusted.

"You insolent subordinate!" Toomin hits him over the head and Wayne falls.

"AND YOU!" he turns to Greg.

"I-I—I- just want a f-f-frappacino!" he shields himself from Toomin.

"BAH! You yuppie humans! Voluntary controllers…hmph!" he storms off. Brad swaggers in with a stiff lip.

"Frappacino." He says in a guttural voice and sets an imaginary cup down.

"Uh…thank you…" Greg says a little unnerved.

"Milk?" he asks.

"No, thank you."

"Sugar?" Brad asks.

"Two lumps please." Brad beats him over the head twice (drum beat).

"Gwafawawaaaa!" he laughs and walks off.

"Your order!" Toomin comes to their table and salutes.

"Um…yeah…." Wayne picks up a menu.

"I think I'll have the chicken cour-don bleu." Wayne says.

"We're invading America! Not France!" Toomin throws up his hands in frustration.

"I'll have a spaghetti platter." Greg says.

"We're not invading Italy either!" Toomin rolls his eyes.

"Fine! A hamburger, well done." Wayne orders.

"I'll have a philly cheese steak." Greg sighs. Toomin takes these down. Then Brad creeps in.

"Grrrrrrrr…" Toomin looks up.

"AH! BANDIT!" He pulls out a dracon weapon and Brad tackles him.

" BZZZZ!" Toomin gets up from the tussle.

"Your hamburger." He places in front of Wayne. Wayne lifts the bun up and stares. Brad comes in again this time swinging his arms like a gorilla.

"AH!" Toomin gets beaten up. Brad swings by.

"Your philly cheese steak." He sets in front of Greg.

"It's blue!" he exclaims. Toomin slithers in.

"Sssssssrrrrrssssssssss!" He snatches both meals and then goes after Wayne.

"AHHH!" Wayne rolls off the set after being 'eaten' by Toomin who then goes away. Greg is left dumbfounded. He is breathing hard and Brad walks in.

"Are you all right?" he puts a hand on his shoulder.

"Ah…yeah…it's just that I haven't fed today." Greg says and pats his stomach.

"Well we'll get you to the pool right away!" Brad begins to hoist him away.

"No! Wait! I didn't mean that!" he drags Greg and pretends to thrust him underwater.

BZZZZZZZZZZZ! The audience claps madly and whistles as the four go back to their seats.

Backstage….

"Follow me." They follow Akisis to a computer lab, very small. She motions Ryan to sit at the computer chair.

"So what?" he asks helpless.

"First, click on the Internet and sign yourself on." Ryan does so.

"Okay, what's second?"

"Type fanfiction.net. When you get there, click on login." Ryan and the others wait for the page to load. His hand shaking on the mouse, he clicks on login and another screen appears.

"Wait a minute! He doesn't have her password! He can't get in!" Colin exclaims. Akisis presses her lips into a line.

"I was hoping you could help me there Ryan. Was there any word in particular that your mother said to you? Something significant?" Ryan taps his fingers and ponders a little. A blush spreads over his face.

"I, think I know…" he turns even redder and laughs some more.

"Eh what is it?" Chip asks with a hint of amusement.

"That's none of your business." Ryan snaps and hunches his shoulders as he types it in. The others try to bend over and see what he writes.

"It's pooky!" Chip says and giggles.

"No! It's poopy or something like that." Colin says.

"Just shut up!" Ryan yells as the page loads. They all hold their breaths.

"Yes!" Akisis cheers. Ryan gapes in wonder at all the fics his mother did. Reading her profile, finding out all the things she liked back then. He smiles.

"So, now he has the power?" Chip asks.

"Yeah, I think so. Try it out Ryan." Ryan opens up Microsoft Word and types something down. He gets up to look out the window. Suddenly, Drew's hair becomes an afro.

"Heheheeee!" They all snicker and giggle. Drew frowns and pats his hair. An eruption of giggles from the audience is heard slightly muffled. Ryan gets a sneaky look on his face and begins to type more.

"Hold up there!" she closes the computer.

"But I was just getting into it!" Ryan complains.

"Time is of the essence. You still have a few things to do to claim all the power." Akisis explains.

"Like what?" he asks. Akisis goes to the window and points.

"See that girl over there? With the wolf and two demons? Do you know what those are?" They look out the window.

" Figments of my imagination?" Colin says.

"That there is an example of a muse." Says Akisis.

"A muse?" Colin asks.

"Yes, they're sorta like daemons. Have any of you here read the His Dark Materials trilogy?"

"Uhhhh…." They trail off and look at each other. Akisis sighs.

"Well, a writer always finds him or herself a muse. Muses help concentrate their power and talent. They give ideas and aid in situations like writer's block. They are very closely connected. The more fics done, the closer they are. A writer's best friend in sum."

"So I need to find a muse? How in the---"

"YAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!! HELP ME!!" A meercat zooms by. He darts around then jumps up on the desk. He grips the collar on Ryan's shirt.

"Dude man you gotta help me! Just hide me I swear I'll pay ya back!" the meercat says. Odrin looks around the corner, his wand held high.

"Ooooooo Chriiiiiiiitooooopherrrrrr……" Odrin taunts.

"AH!" the meercat disappears inside Ryan's shirt.

"Get down!" Akisis instructs. They all do as Odrin creeps by. He taps his shoe with his wand impatiently and zips off.

"Phew! Thanks man." The meercat climbs out of Ryan's shirt.

"Yipes!" Akisis yanks him up by his tail.

"Here we are!" she presents the meercat to Ryan.

"That's a talking rat!" Colin points out.

"Meercat you dumbass!" the meercat swings his fists in midair.

"You see Ryan, this creature has been touched by muse magic. I think it just might work." The meercat struggles and squirms, yelling curses.

"What's your name?" Akisis brings the meercat up to her face.

"Christopher. I was human. Than that son-of-a-bitch fairy turned me into a meercat! Now will you let me go?!" he says.

"I'll turn you back into a human but first you have to do something for me." Akisis proposes. Christopher dangles by his tail.

"Like what?" Akisis places Christopher on Ryan's shoulder.

"Be this guy's muse." Ryan and Christopher stare at each other for a while.

"Dude you need to get better shoes. We're not in the twenties anymore. I mean c'mon!" Christopher comments.

"This looks like a happy relationship." Colin says dryly.

"I think they'll get along juuuuuuuust fiiiine." Akisis smiles.

Onstage….

"Um…we'll return as soon as I find a barber. Don't go away…." Drew narrows his eyes and pats his abnormal afro. Laura Hall begins tapping the keys and the camera pans over the four guys who are laughing and red in the face.

*************************************************************

Wowie! Lenalaye had better watch out for Ryan. Where is she anyway? Why has she barely appeared in her very own fic? Will Toomin ever get a break? How will Christopher and Ryan get along? All this and more when we return to Whose Line is it Anyway?: The Invasion Continues….

Give ME GAME PREFs!

PS: I am too lazy to check and see if there actually is a Trillain on fanfiction.net, just know that if there really is one, the one in this story was not based on them in any way and was made up by me as some meager tribute to the late great Douglas Adams. ( I haven't even read all the books. He died after I finished ' The Restaurant at the End of the Universe'.) *sniffle* oh well.