The Diaries
This particular diary has been written by my friend Phoenix Fyre, who is usually found in the Lord of the Rings section but kindly agreed to write Dooku's diary for me. Thanks to her.
The Diaries of Anakin Skywalker, Obi-wan-Kenobi and Padme Amidala have been made public. Now it is time to read...
The Diary of Count Dooku
Entry One
To do list:
Buy onions
Buy new aftershave
Write letter to Aunty Sue
Take over the universe.
Entry Two:
Have bought onions. And written letter to Aunty Sue. Taking over the universe may be a bit more difficult but it's finding the right scent of aftershave I'm really worried about. I need one that says 'I must be feared' with a slight whiff of sea salt.
Entry Three
Aunty Maggie's birthday.
Entry Four
Bored. Nothing to do. I'm going to have a nap. Inspiration will come. Oh, Uncle Ben says hi.
Entry Five
Captured Prat boy (Obi-wan or whatever he's called) today. Gave him a good kick or two then got bored. On a more interesting note I found the perfect aftershave. Dark and mysterious, but riddled with the sand and lighthouses. Stole it.
Entry Six
Tried to kill Prat boy, his little apprentice and their snooty little Padme but they got away. Chased after them on my flying quadbike and Padsy fell on to the sand. Hope she's dead.
Entry Seven
ANAKIN'S HAND! HIS HAND, HIS HAND, HIS BEAUTIFUL HAND!
Entry Seven (second entry)
Have a plan. I should cut off everyone's head. Or their hands. Tried to slice off Prat boy's manhood but he was surprisingly protective of it. Wonder why. He never uses it. Fnar fnar. Ah well. Oh, and the green man came and did a little bit of fighting.
Aunty Maggie had her baby today. It's a girl. She's called it Lola.
Entry Eight
Run out of aromatic spices.
Entry Nine
Darth Sidious met little baby Lola. He tried to turn her evil but Maggie objected. She's very touchy about it.
Entry Ten
I hear there's a marriage taking place. Maggie says a marriage can either be a prison or a blessing. Maggie must have joined the Prat club.