Disclaimer: The Marauders, etc. belong to J.K. Mr. Foo-foo is all mine. Yayness.

Later that night on The-Day–Which-Began-Normal –But-Then–Went-Horribly-Wrong, the sun had set, the birds were asleep, and the students of Hogwarts were once again snogging their little teenage hearts out. Everyone was happy, from the lowest house-elf (Pookie, the toilet cleaner's assistant's assistant) to the Headmaster, Albus Dumbledore. Then again, Dumbledore went through life on a perpetual sugar high, so this wasn't very surprising. I mean siriusly, no… seriously, he was so happy he made Barney look downright depressed. But I digress. Anyway, everyone in the wwwhhooolllee castle was happy, except for one little seveth-year Gryffie. Guess who. Sirius Black, formerly called Padfoot but now known as 'Oompa-loompa' was one unhappy little camper.

He was currently located on the floor in his dormitory, complaining loudly to his friends about his newfound style. His friends were seated around him, trying very hard to keep their faces straight and not laugh.

"James, I now officially hate Lily Marie Evans." He said darkly, pouting like a five-year-old with a broken toy. "If you marry her, I will never, ever speak to you again, even if you're the last Marauder on Earth."

"Never ever?!!" James gasped, "Why Sirius, you have broken my heart. My life has ended. I have nothing left to live for!" Grabbing a leopard skin pillow, he put it over his face and began to cry fake tears. The pressure was just too much for Remus and Peter to handle. They cracked up, and fell backwards onto the tie-dye rug, laughing like, well, maniac Marauders.

Sirius stood up and stormed over to his bed. Wrenching open it's velvet curtains he jumped in and burrowed underneath his large smiley-face comforter (don't even ask).

"I am never speaking to any of you guys again." He sniffled. Grabbing Mr. Foo-foo, his hippogriff doll, he began to mumble into its ears.

"I swear Mr. Foo-foo, you're my only true friend nowadays…"

***

"Severus Snape is the cutest, most popular guy in the whole wizarding world!!!!" Sirius' handy-dandy alarm clock screeched. Sirius yelled in terror, before realizing his alarm clock was lying. "Geez, did you hafta scare me like that?" He grumbled. The alarm clock merely shrugged its teeny plastic shoulders and proceeded to go back to sleep.

"Damn, bloody, piece o' crap. It gets to sleep in while I go to class." He grumbled as he stumbled out of bed into the boy's shower. Sirius grumbled a lot in the morning.

Arriving back in his dorm room after a five-second shower (honestly, it was only five seconds, I counted) he pulled on his robes, which were still red-and-white striped and peered at his still slumbering roommates. An evil smile grew on his face as he pondered the countless ways to wake them up.

Grabbing his pillow he began to beat his roomies senseless and then ran for his life as all three chased him down the stairs.

***

"Lily, your boyfriend and his friends are complete and total idiots." Hannah March said to Lily. Lily merely nodded sadly in agreement and then turned to watch Sirius 'Oompa-loompa' Black be chased in circles by his three pajama-clad friends.

Gryffindors throughout the Common Room cheered as Sirius leapt random objects in his path. He grinned cheekily and turned around to thank his 'admiring fans' … and tripped over Mr. Foo-foo. (Sirius has major balance problems, doesn't he?)

"Mr. Foo-foo! Please don't die! You're my only friend in the whooole world!" He wailed, hugging poor, 'injured' Mr. Foo-foo to his chest.

"Hey Oomp-Loompa," Someone catcalled, " it's a frigging stuffed animal!"

Sirius gasped and promptly placed his hands over Mr. Foo-foo's ears. "Mr. Foo-foo can't hear you!" He cried in a singsong voice. The other Gryffindors stared avidly at Sirius for a full minute before turning away.

"Prongs, he just gets worse every day." Remus muttered to James. "Yeah," James replied, "must be all those doggie biscuits he used to eat. I think they went to his head." Beside them, Peter nodded his head fervently.

All three Marauders stared at their demented best friend before trudging back to their dorm to beautify themselves. Yes, beautify.

***

The Marauders swaggered into the Great Hall, their best I'm-A-Marauder-And-You're-Not-So-Ha! expressions on their faces. Their smug grins faded as they realized a startling fact. For the first time in their whole Hogwarts stay, the Hall was completely silent. From the Hufflepuff table someone coughed nervously.

"Yes! Revenge is sweet! Mwahahaha!" Severus 'Nancy' Snape yelled from the Slytherin table. All around the Hall people burst into helium-hyena laughing.

The four Marauders bowed their heads and scurried to their table. Sitting down, they promptly pulled plates in front of them and began to hurriedly stuff their faces. All around them fellow Gryffies were crying in mirth. A few were slumped over on the table, faces blue from lack of oxygen.

At the Staff Table the professors appeared to be suffering from convulsions, they were giggling so hard. Dumbledore was sitting on the floor, busily eating lemon drops between bouts of laughter. Hagrid was banging his fist on the table, sending bits of eggs into the faces of everyone within a twenty-foot radius. Random other professors were hiccuping from their laughing fits, looking a bit plastered. In fact, the only professor not laughing was Professor McGonagall. She appeared to have passed out from the exertion of trying not to laugh.

Quite suddenly Dumbledore came out from underneath the Staff Table, wiping his eyes with his beard. Picking up his goblet of spiked pumpkin juice, he shouted, "To Sirius Black, the best damn Oompa-loompa to ever grace the halls of Hogwarts!" Around the hall students picked up their glasses and toasted Sirius.

Sirius jumped onto the Gryffindor Table and proceeded to break-dance in joy. In between head spins, he could be heard saying, "I'm the best damn Oompa-loompa at Hogwarts! Beat that, Nancy!"

A.N. Man that was screwed up. Anyways, this chapter had a bit more plot than the previous ones. Yayness. Review and I shall send you a break-dancing Sirius as a thank you gift. (I wish.) And yes, I know everybody's OOC but it's humor. That's the point of it.

Adios!