REMEMBER: none of these characters are mine; they belong to the fantastic JK Rowling.
NOTE: there is no exact time frame in this. If I want characters in this story, they will be there, even if Oliver Wood and Percy Should not be at Hogwarts at the same time as Dennis Creevey, they are. That is the beauty of writing fanfics. You can bend EVERYTHING! So, don't wrack your brains about it. J
!@#$%^&*!@#$%^&*!@#$%^&*!@#$%^&*!@#$%^&*!@#$%^&*&*!@#$%^&*!
Some Strange Goings on, If I Do Say So Myself. (and I do)
It was a beautiful morning outside Great Hall of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, but inside, you would need a chainsaw to cut the tension.
The Gryffindors were at each other's throats the girls' tempers were already running high, (you know how if you spend enough time together all the That Time of the Months kinda meld together…well…) and when on of the boys pulled that "you women get so emotional" crap and that was it. The Ravenclaws and the Hufflepuffs were all holding each other back to keep from killing each other. Even the Professors at the staff table were squabbling like first years. It was complete bedlam. The Slytherins were only ones who were not fighting. In fact, they were peacefully eating their eggs. A little too peacefully, actually…
We join our our Friends Harry, Ron, Hermione and Company at the very loud Gryffindor table:
"HEY!" Yells George Weasley "I RESENT BEING REFFERED TO AS 'AND COMPANY' I HAVE A NAME! I HAVE AN IDENTITY!!!"
Would you please leave me out of this? I am just doing my job, if you think it must be done, you may name every single damned Gryffindor at this table, Go ahead, I've got nothing but time.
George mumbles under his breath and then hurls his his fork (with Extreme Malice) at his Brother Percy. ANYWAY, if Mr. Weasley is quite finished…
Ron and Hermione are having a furious, if not pointless argument over which one of them had woken up first, ("Ron, I think I would Remember coming down to the common room before you did. It was nearly empty and You Weren't In It!" "Hermione, stop being Mental, I was up and gone before you even came down." "That's what YOU think." "That's what I know!") alright, that's enough of that. Oliver Wood was just about to clock Fred Weasley on the head with his goblet, and the Creevey Brothers were beating the crap out of each other with their cameras. And our Dear Harry Potter is violently stabbing his sausage with his fork. What did that poor pork product ever do to you?
"You try having you're entire bloody life Narrated! It gets old, alright.?!?!"
Touchy. Where Were We? Ah yes. Poor sausage. Well, Gryffindors, as much, er, fun as we are having here, we need to move on to the more interesting occurance of Perfectly Peaceful Slytherins.
"Oh, fine!" Says Parvati Patil as Alicia Spinnet spoons porridge into her hair, "just leave, because WE'RE not important! WE are not relevant! HELL! WE'RE NOT EVEN HUMAN!"
No, I don't think that's true, if you must know, you are all just bringing me down, ok? I was in a lovely mood and you all just jumped down my throat as soon as I got here to do exactly what I am supposed to do. No thanks. See ya around.
Meanwhile, Draco Malfoy is complimenting Vincent Crabbe on his shirt and Pansy Parkinson is asking Someone to "Please Pass the Pumpkin juice." And I, in spite of myself, am rather scared. You never can tell with this lot.
"Oh!, Please don't be frightened! Why ever would you be?" Simpers Gregory Goyle as I am slowly backing away. I need to find a new job. Well, now. Let us go and see whats up at the Staff Table, Shall we?
Professors McGonagall and Snape are having some kind of Vicious staring match.
"Well thank you Miss Obvious!" says Snape, rather rudely, I might add, and my official title is Narrator, if you Don't Mind!
"Ha ha! I beat you!" Screams McGonagall, jumping up on the High Table, "IN YOUR FACE SNAPE! RIGHT IN IT!!!! HELL YES! OH BLOODY HELL YES!!!!" Snape is now pushing Mcgonagall right off the table!
"TAKE THAT, You old Hag!" Snape says, jumping up and down on his chair. And now Dumbledore takes a handful of hash browns and hurls it at Snape and McGonnagall.
I'm sorry, did I say it was Bedlam Before? Well, now it's the #$*%ing Apocalypse! I am SO GONE!
!@#$%^&*!@#$%^&*!@#$%^&*!@#$%^&*!@#$%^&*!@#$%^&*!@#$%^&*!@#$%^&*!@#$%^&*!@#$%^
What The Hell? Has the world turned upside down? Find out….Whenever I get around to writing it! stay tuned, kids!