We (the greatest of Spork ladies) own nothing
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Strider dragged the two babbling hobbits to the secret council.
The secret council consisted of a man named Boromir, Gimli the dwarf, Legolas the Elf, Gandalf, Elrond, and Strider. Some other random people were there, but no one cares nor likes them. Once everyone was seated and the hobbits were as close to quiet as they were gonna get, Elrond began.
"The reason you have been brought here is because the fate of Middle Earth hangs in the balance. The One Spork has been found."
Everyone started murmering at once, then Elrond raised his hand for quiet.
"What will be done with the One Spork? The least of Sporks?" He asked.
"I say we eat the beaver!" Frodo yelled. Everyone stared at him. Gandalf cleared his throat.
"As you can see, the spork has an unwholesome effect on its bearer. I say it must be destroyed in the fires of Mount Doom. Before the Dark Lord get his hands on it. Which is bad." He said, watching Frodo and Bilbo in the corner of his eye.
Elrond nodded in agreement. " I think we should--" He was cut off by Frodo.
"Quit watching me, you squirrel pervert!" He screamed while pointing at Gimli. Everyone stopped and looked at them.
"I wasn't watching him," Gimli grunted.
"When you hear yourself talk, does it make sense to YOU?" Bilbo said, sticking up for Frodo. Gimli grabbed his axe when Elrond raised his hand once again to calm things.
Elrond sighed. "As I said, I think we should--" Once again he was cut off.
"Whose leg do I have to hump to get a decent martini around here?" Bilbo said outloud.
"SHUT UP!" Everyone yelled at the same time. Elrond stood silent for a moment to make sure that he wasn't going to be interrupted anymore.
"I think we should send a fellowship to destroy the spork. Any volunteers?" he asked. Everyone suddenly looked uncomfortable and wouldn't make eye contact with him. He sighed.
"Legolas, Gimli, Frodo, Strider; also known as Aragorn, Islidur's heir, whatever it is you feel like being called, Boromir, Gandalf, and the other three hobbits shall go. The Fellowship of the Spork."
Those being forced to go, groaned in annoyance.
"And one more thing..." Elrond began.
"Oh, I just remembered. You're boring. And my legs work." Frodo announced, as he walked out of the room, thus ending the council of Elrond.
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Strider dragged the two babbling hobbits to the secret council.
The secret council consisted of a man named Boromir, Gimli the dwarf, Legolas the Elf, Gandalf, Elrond, and Strider. Some other random people were there, but no one cares nor likes them. Once everyone was seated and the hobbits were as close to quiet as they were gonna get, Elrond began.
"The reason you have been brought here is because the fate of Middle Earth hangs in the balance. The One Spork has been found."
Everyone started murmering at once, then Elrond raised his hand for quiet.
"What will be done with the One Spork? The least of Sporks?" He asked.
"I say we eat the beaver!" Frodo yelled. Everyone stared at him. Gandalf cleared his throat.
"As you can see, the spork has an unwholesome effect on its bearer. I say it must be destroyed in the fires of Mount Doom. Before the Dark Lord get his hands on it. Which is bad." He said, watching Frodo and Bilbo in the corner of his eye.
Elrond nodded in agreement. " I think we should--" He was cut off by Frodo.
"Quit watching me, you squirrel pervert!" He screamed while pointing at Gimli. Everyone stopped and looked at them.
"I wasn't watching him," Gimli grunted.
"When you hear yourself talk, does it make sense to YOU?" Bilbo said, sticking up for Frodo. Gimli grabbed his axe when Elrond raised his hand once again to calm things.
Elrond sighed. "As I said, I think we should--" Once again he was cut off.
"Whose leg do I have to hump to get a decent martini around here?" Bilbo said outloud.
"SHUT UP!" Everyone yelled at the same time. Elrond stood silent for a moment to make sure that he wasn't going to be interrupted anymore.
"I think we should send a fellowship to destroy the spork. Any volunteers?" he asked. Everyone suddenly looked uncomfortable and wouldn't make eye contact with him. He sighed.
"Legolas, Gimli, Frodo, Strider; also known as Aragorn, Islidur's heir, whatever it is you feel like being called, Boromir, Gandalf, and the other three hobbits shall go. The Fellowship of the Spork."
Those being forced to go, groaned in annoyance.
"And one more thing..." Elrond began.
"Oh, I just remembered. You're boring. And my legs work." Frodo announced, as he walked out of the room, thus ending the council of Elrond.