Nat: Once again you are all a bunch of lovely people. I think I'm gonna do this fic to death, hopefully 2 more parts after this. But there we go.
Um yes, this is part 3. Once again in Kai's POV (anyone detect a pattern?)
Yami Nat: Oh yeah, and none of these characters belong to Nat or me.
Nat: Too right, hey you're back! (my yami wasn't speaking to me for months)
Y.N: Yup back with a bang, and this story had better match to my expectations so get typing….
Nat: I'm right on it!
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Tyson said all that
I heard every word
But I don't want him to know
Just yet that
I am here.
He's holding my hand
He's sitting so close
Lifting the chill
That I possess.
The first thing I notice is how cold it is. I felt that before I opened my eyes. I took a while, I wasn't sure how I'd react to whatever situation I was in. But I can't be dead, everything is too real. Somebody is holding my hand, their fingers are cold, just like my surroundings. Russia, I must still be here. Hell would never be this cold and if I am dead, then that is where I would be.
I have caused so much trouble, for everybody. Especially the one that I love so much.
I'm lying down on a mattress that is hard. There is no sound but somebody is with me, the one who was talking to me, telling me they are sorry and that they love me. And want me back. Actually want me back.
But I know that it is you who are with me Tyson. Nobody else would care this much, or say such words.
I run my thumb down one of your fingers just to let you know that I am here. A tender movement, so alien to me but natural now.
"Kai?" Your voice is strained, tense. Unlike you, this has altered the both of us. Hopefully for the better.
I flicker open one eye a little. And get a look at you from through my eyelashes. It is a dark room but I can see you quite well, since you are so close. I wasn't anywhere, while I was asleep. Just sort of oblivious. It was like I only passed out a minute ago but it couldn't have been, I'm not outside in your arms any longer.
"T-Tyson." I can't believe my voice is shaking, it is either so very cold or just the way I feel. Probably a combination of both.
"You're okay. I can't believe it."
"You said you wanted me to be back, you should believe it."
You throw your leg up onto the bed so you can sit closer. "Oh Kai," you say so softly. "I was so worried, terrified actually."
You're shaking and it isn't surprising, even your hand on mine seems below normal temperature.
"Tyson, you're freezing."
"I'm f-fine," you shiver looking down at me. "It i-isn't important."
But you know, you are all that is important to me now. If you don't know then I'll show you. I'll show you for as long as we are together and hopefully that time will not be too short.
Now we will
Forget everything
Just for a while
My past is gone
I will make
The effort to change
As long as you
Stay.
Stay with me
And never leave.
"Come here Tyson."
"What do you mean," you ask, not shivering so much now you are thinking over what I mean.
"I mean," I feel myself going a little red and suppress a laugh. I never blush, not emotionless Kai. I really have changed. "It's warmer under this sheet, although I might sue this hospital for negligence. This is no way to treat a patient who…"
I tail off merely because you are now beside me. So close.
Tentatively I stroke my good arm round your back and pull you against me. You really are cold.
"How long were you sat there?"
You move to look at your watch. "Four hours."
"Four hours in the freezing cold, just waiting." I say wistfully, wishing I hadn't put you through any of this.
"Hoping," you added and wrap your arms around me, snuggling up under my chin trying to get warmer. I stroke your back idly and stare up at the hint of the ceiling visible through the semi darkness.
"I didn't mean it Tyson, any of it. I promise."
You whisper against my chest. "I know now Kai. I'll never drive you to this again."
I hope you are
Listening to
What I have to say.
I hope you can forgive me.
"What did you think?"
"What do you mean?" You reply in a murmur.
"When you saw me after what happened, what I did?"
"I was terrified Kai. I thought I might lose you. I kind of wondered what made you do it. But I already felt terrible about what I had said. You know I don't hate you, in fact nothing could be further from the truth."
"I know now. You have to understand I didn't want to hurt you, I thought that you didn't care. I thought it would be my own way out, I didn't mean to hurt you Tyson. I'd never do that."
"But you always did. All the time, everything you said. That was why I said I hated you, in a strange sort of way I did."
"I never knew you cared. It is strange how love made us bitter. It needn't have done."
"No," you sigh snuggling up closer to me.
I rest my bad arm on your waist and you look down, stroking my bandage and clasping your hand round mine.
"Does it hurt?"
"Not anymore," I lie but you make the pain less noticeable.
You sit up a little on your elbow and look down at me with your deep misty blue eyes. I notice, not for the first time, how your hair falls into your eyes. I reach up with my good arm and stroke it away but it falls back quite as fast.
You're smiling at me, warmly the silver through the window highlighting little areas of your face.
I suddenly have a thought and slip my arm round to the ponytail at the back of your head. I loop my fingers into the band and take it off gently. As the band falls down my wrist, your slate coloured hair falls out over your shoulders. I can't resist but stroke down it and you lean into my touch like a friendly cat.
You move down up to me and slip one arm round my waist, pulling me closer. It hurts a little, I find myself wincing involuntarily. I have hardly moved for two days and my arm dragged a little where it lay on your side.
"Kai," you whisper to me from where your lips are on my cheek. "I don't want to hurt you."
"It's OK," I reply. "It's not too bad. I'll be fine."
You push my arm back softly on my side with your fingers still wrapped round mine. In the process you move tighter against me. I keep my good arm round your back, still stroking your long hair. Our foreheads are against each other, and your lips are only an inch from meeting mine.
"Tyson I promise you. Never again will I be so stupid, never. I know that you feel for me and I'd never have done it if only I…"
"Shh," you interrupt. "I know you said already and I believe you."
"You are so beautiful Tyson."
"Me!" You blush a little, I can see it. "I'm not beautiful. I'm just Tyson, I'm…"
"Beautiful." I tell you again for I know I am right.
"I'm nothing compared to you."
Now it's my turn to blush.
You laugh a little and smile. I move up despite the ache of my body and lay you back against the Russian excuse for a pillow.
You are warming me
With such intensity
Not just my body
But my soul
My all is you
You are my everything.
That moment when I kissed you I forgot everything except what it felt like to have your lips on mine, softly. I think it was the moment that summed up everything I had ever hoped for, and I felt at last as if you had forgiven me. I knew that I would have to make a few changes to the way I acted but that would come with time. It would mean going against everything I had believed. But your lips taught me new beliefs, a new scripture.
We stayed together for a few hours, you fell asleep in my arms. I did not wake you until I heard footsteps in that dark corridor outside.
And so you headed back.
I was allowed out of hospital that next morning, with orders to 'take it easy.' And so that was what I planned. But there was more, I wouldn't push the team too hard, I'd leave that to Kenny.
I convalesced for a short time, and you were my comfort whilst I battled with my soul.
As for the road now…. Neither of us know. We'll take it step by step. Roads never end.
But I'll never leave you again
I promise you
I will never again
Be so cold.