A Relaxing Vacation…
Gone Wrong!
Fanfic by AmphitriteAuthoress Notes: [frown] Since two people thought het was hentai, I thought I'd make it clear. It's just short for heterosexual. As in Seto/Serenity instead of Seto/Joey or Serenity/Téa. Guy/girl instead of guy/guy or girl/girl. OKAY? Sorry, it just got me pissed off people thought I was a hentai freak…no offense, hentai freaks. -__- I can be a R-fiction (on ff.net, NC-17 elsewhere) freak, but not pictures…~_~ Okay, I'm done. Just…keep in mind what I just said, okay?
[sigh] I only got two suggestions…I guess every story has to start somewhere, but still! So you know what, I'm going to open up the voting/submit box for another week. More info at the bottom.
Warnings: Just to let you new people (the ones who haven't read Conversations), I have an unhealthy obsession with one Malik Ishtar, k? And it's still short because I need more ideas…
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Yami and Isis are chatting about Egypt in a room that looks something like a family room. Serenity is sipping a bottle of soda (more like chugging it down) and watching Y. Malik and Bakura bragging about how good their Millennium Items are. Yugi is just…sitting there, flipping through a Duel Monsters magazine. Malik is quivering from a dark corner. Lei walks in with Ryou behind her and scans the room.
Lei: [grins triumphantly as she sees Malik]
Malik: [whimpers]
Lei: [bounces onto a couch] [perkily] I just saw the new episodes!! Ryou did too, but I don't think he was too happy about it…
All: [look at Ryou]
Ryou: [fumes] They completely cut me out! It was only Bakura pretending to be me…AGAIN!! T_T What happened to me??
Bakura: [hears his name] Huh?
Ryou: [pouts angrily] [sits down on the couch]
Lei: [blinks] Anyway… [whiny] I still don't know where to take you guys!
Malik: [mumbles] Anywhere away from you is fine.
Lei: [glomps Malik]
Malik: NOT AGAIN, NOT AGAIN, NOT AGAIN!!
Y. Malik: [thoughtfully] You know, I'm beginning to think that Lee-lee's obsession with my aibou is very…unhealthy.
Bakura: [sarcastically] When did you figure that out?
Lei: [hugs Malik tighter] Don't call me Lee-lee.
Yugi: [grins from the couch and goes running around and bumping into walls yelling: Lee-lee!]
Silence.
Yugi: [sits back down calmly and picks up his magazine as if nothing ever happened]
All: [blink slowly]
Yami and Isis: [go back to rambling about Egypt]
Others: [blink again] [shake their heads]
Ryou: …I think he stole sugar from Lei's secret stash again…
Others: Oh, that explains it. [nod]
Lei: Huh? Yugi found my sugar stash? NOOOOOOOOOOOOO…the world is doomed! And so am I! I spent so much on it!
Serenity: [points at sign in bright neon letters: Here is the Not-So-Secret Sugar Stash]
Lei: [contemplates this] Oh. So where to? [drags Malik back to the couch]
Bakura: [frown] Didn't Bob make an announcement for you?
Lei: [sigh] Yeah, but I only got two suggestions. T_T
Y. Malik: Haha!
Lei: [raises an eyebrow] [sighs again] You guys aren't helping.
Malik: [grouchily from being glomped] We're not supposed to help. We're muses. We're supposed to inspire.
Lei: [frowns] But this is writing, so you're supposed to inspire me about what to write!
Ryou: [sighs] She's right. I think.
Lei: I'm always right. When have I been wrong?
Bakura: Well…there was that time when you made Faye (A/n: One of my OC muses) act girly and told her that it would make me like her. And then—
Lei: [blushes] [quickly] Uh, let's put the past behind us, shall we?
Yugi: [mutters to self] Bad mental image, bad mental image…
Ryou: [right eye twitches]
Lei: What's the bad mental image, Faye acting girly, or Faye liking Bakura?
Yugi: …both.
Faye: [storms in] I am so pissed off!! The stupid police stole my knives! All of them. Well, except that silver one with the bronze handle, but that was only because—[starts rambling about how the cops took her weapons]
All: [used to her] [ignore her]
Faye: Listen to me!! [throws knives at all of them]
All: [duck]
Lei: [slowly] Hey, I thought you said that the policemen took all your knives?
Faye: [crossly] So I lied. Sue me.
Seto: [walks in] Okay.
A bunch of lawyers come in.
Random Lawyer 1: Mr. Seto Kaiba against Ms. Faye Harper.
Faye: [hisses] Miss!
Random Lawyer 1: [blinks] Miss Faye Harper.
Bakura: Didn't Lei have the same reaction when I called her "Ms."?
Lei: [looking lost] Huh?
Bakura: Never mind.
Random Lawyer 1: [repeats] Mr. Seto Kaiba against Ms. Faye Harper! Who will win?
Random Lawyer 2: You know, this isn't a wrestling match or anything.
Random Lawyer 3: Like, oh my gosh! Did you, like, see that absolutely, like, fantabulous, like, match yesterday?
Random Lawyer 1: I know! It was totally, like, awesome!
The Random Lawyers start rambling about the wrestling match they saw yesterday.
All muses+Lei: -__-;;
Lei: Uh…Seto?
Seto: What?
Lei: Don't bring any strangers to my house next time, please.
Seto: …okay.
Lei: [frowns and uses her awesome author powers to banish the Random Lawyers from her house] [grins] [grin falters] I STILL DON'T KNOW WHERE TO TAKE YOU GUYS!!
Serenity: [grabs another bottle of soda] …Why are you taking us somewhere anyway?
Silence. Thirty two minutes and seventeen seconds later…
Lei: Umm…good question.
All: [sweatdrop]
Lei: Anyway, I need help, reviewers! And if you already submitted answers, thank you so much! If not, do so NOW!!! [laughs evilly]
All: [silent]
Y. Malik: I don't get it. What's so funny?
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End notes: I'm sorry that I haven't actually started yet, but I need more ideas. Here's the poll box:
o The Bahamas
o France
o Or submit your own idea!
Bakura: What makes you think they're going to do that?
Me: Do you doubt my persuasion skill?
Bakura: …yes.
Me: ~_~ At least you have good reason to…well, I just want to say thanks for reviewing, Shiro Amayagi and Rosz of the Angel! And as for you [points to reader] REVIEW!! Oh yeah, the voting stops next Saturday (November 23, 2002), okay?