Okay. Please don't take this seriously. I thought I'd add it to here just
in case someone was very bored and felt like reading it. It was written for
the website run by my friends and me. I'm a big, Big Brother fan and I
wondered what it would be like if the Fellowship were in the house. So I've
written it! It's not meant to be offensive in any way. This BB is set in
the UK Big Brother-Series 3 house.
All characters are owned by J.R.R Tolkien.
Day 1 - 10:00am
"Day 1 in the Big Brother house and the contestants have yet to arrive. Their identities have been kept secret from the press but now the day has come. Gandalf is the first to arrive."
The door opened and Gandalf walked in carrying his silver case. He walked down the stairs looking in wonder at was to be his home for maybe the next 10 weeks. Placing his case at the bottom of the stairs, Gandalf began to walk around, inspecting everything, clearly pleased about what he saw.
"The next contestant to arrive is Saruman."
Saruman entered with a look of glee on his face and made his way hurriedly down the stairs. His face fell as he reached the bottom and saw Gandalf standing there looking equally downcast.
"Gandalf." Said Saruman curtly.
"Saruman." Said Gandalf, almost as if spitting the name.
"What are you doing here?" Asked Saruman.
"I'm a contestant you fool." Replied Gandalf sarcastically.
"Oh." Said Saruman, and he sniffed turning up his nose. "I see they're letting anyone in."
"I shall not sink to your level of bitching Saruman, however much you goad me."
Saruman turned his back on Gandalf and walked away. Gandalf turned away.
"Well they let you in you nance." He muttered under his breath.
Saruman glanced back suspiciously at Gandalf but he was already heading towards the kitchen. Saruman walked to a door and pushed it open, finding himself in the first bedroom.
"I call this room!" He yelled.
"We have to share Saruman." Replied Gandalf.
"Share?! Saruman the White does not share!" Exclaimed Saruman.
"Fair enough." Called back Gandalf. "I am sure the chickens wouldn't mind moving."
Just as Saruman was about to reply there was a commotion from the top of the stairs and a group of hobbits and cases practically fell through the door. Frodo, Sam, Merry and Pippin ran down the stairs with squeals of excitement.
"This is fantastic!" Yelled Pippin.
The hobbits proceeded to run rather insanely about the house. First stop was the kitchen. Cupboard doors were pulled open frantically and the contents called out to each other. Then Merry spotted the garden. He ran for the door and slid then open. The other hobbit followed shortly. Sprinting across the garden he reached the vegetable patch.
"Carrots!" He yelled. "They have carrots!"
"5 minutes later, Aragorn, Boromir, Gimli and Legolas enter the house."
Boromir strode in first, a slight swagger in his step. Aragorn entered followed by Gimli. Legolas was the last to enter. As the door closed he let out a yell. All turned to see Legolas bent back, his hair trapped in the door.
"My hair! My hair!" He cried. "It's stuck! My beautiful hair!"
Gimli sighed and strode back up the stairs. Taking a fistful of Legolas' hair, he pulled it free of the door resulting in a scream. Gimli grunted and stomped down the stairs with Legolas following behind trying to retain some dignity.
"The final two to arrive in the house are Sauron and Arwen. The housemates have all collected together in the living area."
The housemates stood up as the door opened and there was the sound of a scuffle outside. At once both Sauron and Arwen squeezed through the door. Each giving each other angry looks (well Sauron more like growled as you could not see his face underneath the metal helmet) and jostled their way down the stairs. The housemates greeted them with warm smiles, shaking hands. The hobbits we rather reluctant to shake hands with Sauron, they couldn't reach in first place, but being polite they say their hellos. They all then proceeded to take a quick tour around the house together with shouts of glee at the things they found.
"Now all housemates have arrived they decide to chose rooms and start unpacking. The four hobbits, Gandalf and Arwen have taken Bedroom 1 while Sauron, Legolas, Gimli, Boromir, Aragorn and Saruman have taken Bedroom 2"
Saruman sat at the end of his bed with his arms folded, pouting. However many times he had tried to persuade the other housemates that the other room might be better for them they did not buy it and had chosen their beds. Now in all bedrooms each housemate were unpacking their suitcases.
"What are they?" Asked Aragorn, pointing at something he noticed in Boromir's case.
Boromir glanced down and his eyes widened in panic. He grabbed hold of the silk boxers shorts with hearts printed on and stuffed them in his drawer. He looked at Aragorn laughed nervously and went back to packing.
Gimli looked through his bag frantically as if he had lost something. Smiling he pulled out a blue cuddly teddy bear and placed it on the pillow. Gently tucking him in under the covers. Legolas had already started to arrange his cosmetics carefully on the spaces provided.
In the 1st bedroom the hobbits were also unpacking. Gandalf, who had only to pull out another grey robe and a couple of books and other necessities, was now sitting smoking a pipe. The hobbits were still unpacking. They watched in surprise as Sam pulled out a couple if kitchen utensils.
"What do you need those for?" Asked Frodo.
"Well I don't leave anywhere with out my pans." Replied Sam.
"And the gardening sheers?" Asked Merry.
Sam uttered something under his breath and they carried on packing.
Arwen was now collecting all her clothes, which had been packed into the suitcase so tight that when she opened it there had been an explosion of dresses and lingerie. She had turned to find one of her bras had landed on Gandalf's head and he stood with a comical expression of bemusement upon his face. With an embarrassed mumble of apology, she whipped it off his head and continued collecting her scattered belongings.
All characters are owned by J.R.R Tolkien.
Day 1 - 10:00am
"Day 1 in the Big Brother house and the contestants have yet to arrive. Their identities have been kept secret from the press but now the day has come. Gandalf is the first to arrive."
The door opened and Gandalf walked in carrying his silver case. He walked down the stairs looking in wonder at was to be his home for maybe the next 10 weeks. Placing his case at the bottom of the stairs, Gandalf began to walk around, inspecting everything, clearly pleased about what he saw.
"The next contestant to arrive is Saruman."
Saruman entered with a look of glee on his face and made his way hurriedly down the stairs. His face fell as he reached the bottom and saw Gandalf standing there looking equally downcast.
"Gandalf." Said Saruman curtly.
"Saruman." Said Gandalf, almost as if spitting the name.
"What are you doing here?" Asked Saruman.
"I'm a contestant you fool." Replied Gandalf sarcastically.
"Oh." Said Saruman, and he sniffed turning up his nose. "I see they're letting anyone in."
"I shall not sink to your level of bitching Saruman, however much you goad me."
Saruman turned his back on Gandalf and walked away. Gandalf turned away.
"Well they let you in you nance." He muttered under his breath.
Saruman glanced back suspiciously at Gandalf but he was already heading towards the kitchen. Saruman walked to a door and pushed it open, finding himself in the first bedroom.
"I call this room!" He yelled.
"We have to share Saruman." Replied Gandalf.
"Share?! Saruman the White does not share!" Exclaimed Saruman.
"Fair enough." Called back Gandalf. "I am sure the chickens wouldn't mind moving."
Just as Saruman was about to reply there was a commotion from the top of the stairs and a group of hobbits and cases practically fell through the door. Frodo, Sam, Merry and Pippin ran down the stairs with squeals of excitement.
"This is fantastic!" Yelled Pippin.
The hobbits proceeded to run rather insanely about the house. First stop was the kitchen. Cupboard doors were pulled open frantically and the contents called out to each other. Then Merry spotted the garden. He ran for the door and slid then open. The other hobbit followed shortly. Sprinting across the garden he reached the vegetable patch.
"Carrots!" He yelled. "They have carrots!"
"5 minutes later, Aragorn, Boromir, Gimli and Legolas enter the house."
Boromir strode in first, a slight swagger in his step. Aragorn entered followed by Gimli. Legolas was the last to enter. As the door closed he let out a yell. All turned to see Legolas bent back, his hair trapped in the door.
"My hair! My hair!" He cried. "It's stuck! My beautiful hair!"
Gimli sighed and strode back up the stairs. Taking a fistful of Legolas' hair, he pulled it free of the door resulting in a scream. Gimli grunted and stomped down the stairs with Legolas following behind trying to retain some dignity.
"The final two to arrive in the house are Sauron and Arwen. The housemates have all collected together in the living area."
The housemates stood up as the door opened and there was the sound of a scuffle outside. At once both Sauron and Arwen squeezed through the door. Each giving each other angry looks (well Sauron more like growled as you could not see his face underneath the metal helmet) and jostled their way down the stairs. The housemates greeted them with warm smiles, shaking hands. The hobbits we rather reluctant to shake hands with Sauron, they couldn't reach in first place, but being polite they say their hellos. They all then proceeded to take a quick tour around the house together with shouts of glee at the things they found.
"Now all housemates have arrived they decide to chose rooms and start unpacking. The four hobbits, Gandalf and Arwen have taken Bedroom 1 while Sauron, Legolas, Gimli, Boromir, Aragorn and Saruman have taken Bedroom 2"
Saruman sat at the end of his bed with his arms folded, pouting. However many times he had tried to persuade the other housemates that the other room might be better for them they did not buy it and had chosen their beds. Now in all bedrooms each housemate were unpacking their suitcases.
"What are they?" Asked Aragorn, pointing at something he noticed in Boromir's case.
Boromir glanced down and his eyes widened in panic. He grabbed hold of the silk boxers shorts with hearts printed on and stuffed them in his drawer. He looked at Aragorn laughed nervously and went back to packing.
Gimli looked through his bag frantically as if he had lost something. Smiling he pulled out a blue cuddly teddy bear and placed it on the pillow. Gently tucking him in under the covers. Legolas had already started to arrange his cosmetics carefully on the spaces provided.
In the 1st bedroom the hobbits were also unpacking. Gandalf, who had only to pull out another grey robe and a couple of books and other necessities, was now sitting smoking a pipe. The hobbits were still unpacking. They watched in surprise as Sam pulled out a couple if kitchen utensils.
"What do you need those for?" Asked Frodo.
"Well I don't leave anywhere with out my pans." Replied Sam.
"And the gardening sheers?" Asked Merry.
Sam uttered something under his breath and they carried on packing.
Arwen was now collecting all her clothes, which had been packed into the suitcase so tight that when she opened it there had been an explosion of dresses and lingerie. She had turned to find one of her bras had landed on Gandalf's head and he stood with a comical expression of bemusement upon his face. With an embarrassed mumble of apology, she whipped it off his head and continued collecting her scattered belongings.