Fu's Shoes
By Al Kristopher
Oh I went down to the store
To buy me self some shoes
I walked all over the mall
And sang myself the blues
No shoes were here for me now,
No shoes for me lil' feet
No shoes not there or here now,
A salesman I shall beat.
Oh wait here is a pair!
A pair for me to wear
To wear a pear and to pare a ware
I'll pay any ware to wear the pair, I dare!
I walk-ed down the block
With my shoesies on me feet
I looked so cool and calm now
Gosh-golly, don't I look neat?
My shoes are so-so awesome,
And really really snug
They fit just like a rubber,
Just like a rubber glove.
I love my widdle shoesies,
The left one and the right,
They look so cool just walking,
Just walking in the light!
Step up one and two, these shoes, of whose,
I had the most excellent privilege to choose!
To choose these shoes of whose,
Are mine,
To kick a moose! These shoes I choose.
(The moose being Raijin)
My shoe, beautiful shoe, belonging to Fu,
Upon her feet, my feet, do they meet, and beat
The moose, my shoes I choose, to beat the moose loose!
Left foot stand, stand firm upon the side, not walk--
Let the other, your brother, your right, kick the blight,
That moose, that ignoramus, that punching-bag for feet!
Let ye, O precious shoe of Fu, kick that moose til' he's blue!
Kick! I do so enjoy! To stand and buck like a mule,
Whack-pow, and smile, and scowl, and use the shoe of Fu
My shoe, my beautiful shoe, upon the foot of Fu!
So true!!!
But alas, inside, inside the carpet,
Must I remove you, shoe of Fu,
And place you underneath
My bed.
Sleep, shoe, sleep well,
And tomorrow we shall kick, and walk,
And crush, and dance, and prance.
Let my feet make love to you tomorrow,
O mighty shu of Foo.
Precious shoe, looking black as obsidian,
I can't think of a word that rhymes with obsidian,
I place my lips upon your sole, no tongue!
And kiss you, most daint'ly, my wonderful shoe!
Kiss-kiss, I love you, my darling shue,
Love you true do I, do I love you tru, my shoo
From the rubber on your sole to the lace that ties yoo
And shoe, and lace, and rubber so delicate,
Allow your soul to embrace me, let me walk
(And kick)
And let you, O shu, be as a kicker to the moo
And let you let me travel, across dangers, my shoe!
Let you let me give chase to my love, and hold him
(But please excuse Foo if yu, oh shew, are placed underneath,
When my love and I lay rest in bed! Ha ha!)
But shoe, O shoo of Foo, I love yu!
Love you troo, do, I shuu!
And I shall kill any who soils your beauty, my shoe,
O precious shew of Fu.
I LOVE MY SHOES!!!!!
The End