Nov 2002
Disclaimer 1: It all (SW) belong to Lucasfilm, I don't own it.
Disclaimer 2: The song is by Martina McBride and I don't own that either :P I removed one line "It happens to alot of men" because it didn't fit in the context of the story.
Part 9
*And they said there's nothing you can do It's something that he's going through.*
Obi-Wan escorted Padmé back to her suite three weeks later. She'd been spending alot of time with the mature Jedi Knight, speaking to him privately about Anakin and their meetings. They'd spent alot of time flying about Coruscant and simply speaking. Obi-Wan was one of her few friends and she needed him now more than ever.
Anakin had been gone for three weeks, and though that was nothing new, the manner in which he'd left was. He'd gone away angry, believing that she'd betrayed him and the anguish in his eyes still haunted her dreams. She'd hurt him unintentionally and it was eating at her. She hadn't wanted to hurt him. Obi-Wan had become accustom to her long silences and respected her need to think. He was obviously worried about her, and though she appreciated his concern, she didn't feel it was deserved. She'd practically driven Anakin away, or so she felt.
She settled on the sofa, Obi-Wan sitting across from her, and she pulled a remote from her pocket. Hitting a series of buttons, she carefully deactivated every cam in the room. She didn't need, or want, prying eyes as she spoke to Obi-Wan. Her security force didn't like her new toy, but they were slowly beginning to accept her need for privacy. He was silent, waiting for her to speak as she gathered her thoughts.
How could she ask him for advice when she didn't fully understand what was happening with her husband? She took a bracing breath, trying to formulate the proper order for her words as Obi-Wan waited patiently. She lifted her gaze, meeting his eyes and hoped he couldn't read the turmoil in her soul. Not that it would matter. She was going to try and voice it; she just didn't want him to read it first. "I've lost, Obi-Wan."
He arched an eyebrow but didn't say anything as she continued; her words were soft and strained. She wondered if he could tell how much she was hurting inside by her tone of voice. "I haven't heard from him, not a message or a call, in three weeks. He's never been out of touch for so long." She twisted her hands in her lap, dropping her gaze from the compassionate eyes of the Jedi Knight. "When we last spoke he was furious with me. He's never been angry with me before, I thought we could work this out but if he doesn't make the effort, I don't know what I can do."
She took a deep, shaky breath. "I can't give up on him, I just can't. I love him," she looked up, her eyes sparkling with tears she refused to shed in Obi-Wan's presence. "I don't know what to do, Obi-Wan. I don't know how to get through to him. He's changed so much, so fast, its almost like he's a completely different person."
"Don't give up on him, Padmé." Obi-Wan leaned forward and gently grasped her hands, covering them with his. She wondered if he knew how easy it would be for her to follow that advice. She'd never given up on him, not before and not now. She wasn't sure she'd ever be able to.
"I couldn't give up on him, but if he doesn't come back..."
"He will." Obi-Wan's voice held a confident note, almost as if he knew something she didn't. "He loves you, but sometimes when people go through difficult times there's nothing we can do. Support him, be there for him, but don't try to stop him. Anakin will find his own path if he lets the Force guide him and that path will lead back to you."
She closed her eyes, allowing his words to wash over her. Obi-Wan was basically telling her she couldn't do anything but wait. That, more than anything, would be harder than action. She slowly opened her eyes, and nodded. "Thank you," she squeezed his hands and stood, pulling the Jedi into a sudden hug. "It might kill me to wait for him to find his way back to me, but I'll wait."
Obi-Wan returned her hug briefly before turning to leave. She didn't watch him go as she turned and headed for the balcony, leaving the security cameras off. She wanted privacy and she was going to get it. Stepping onto the balcony, she went to the rail and leaned against it, looking out across the vista of buildings and traffic.
"Are you watching me, Anakin?" she whispered softly, her voice breaking. "Do you know how much I love you?" she took a deep, bracing breath. He knew. He'd always known. And he had to come back to her. Without him she wasn't sure if she'd be able to go on. Resolving to give him the time and space he needed, to wait until he came back to her, she turned, and re- entered her suite. If time was what it would take, then that's what she would give him. Nobody would know, save Obi-Wan, exactly how much she was hurting.
Disclaimer 2: The song is by Martina McBride and I don't own that either :P I removed one line "It happens to alot of men" because it didn't fit in the context of the story.
Part 9
*And they said there's nothing you can do It's something that he's going through.*
Obi-Wan escorted Padmé back to her suite three weeks later. She'd been spending alot of time with the mature Jedi Knight, speaking to him privately about Anakin and their meetings. They'd spent alot of time flying about Coruscant and simply speaking. Obi-Wan was one of her few friends and she needed him now more than ever.
Anakin had been gone for three weeks, and though that was nothing new, the manner in which he'd left was. He'd gone away angry, believing that she'd betrayed him and the anguish in his eyes still haunted her dreams. She'd hurt him unintentionally and it was eating at her. She hadn't wanted to hurt him. Obi-Wan had become accustom to her long silences and respected her need to think. He was obviously worried about her, and though she appreciated his concern, she didn't feel it was deserved. She'd practically driven Anakin away, or so she felt.
She settled on the sofa, Obi-Wan sitting across from her, and she pulled a remote from her pocket. Hitting a series of buttons, she carefully deactivated every cam in the room. She didn't need, or want, prying eyes as she spoke to Obi-Wan. Her security force didn't like her new toy, but they were slowly beginning to accept her need for privacy. He was silent, waiting for her to speak as she gathered her thoughts.
How could she ask him for advice when she didn't fully understand what was happening with her husband? She took a bracing breath, trying to formulate the proper order for her words as Obi-Wan waited patiently. She lifted her gaze, meeting his eyes and hoped he couldn't read the turmoil in her soul. Not that it would matter. She was going to try and voice it; she just didn't want him to read it first. "I've lost, Obi-Wan."
He arched an eyebrow but didn't say anything as she continued; her words were soft and strained. She wondered if he could tell how much she was hurting inside by her tone of voice. "I haven't heard from him, not a message or a call, in three weeks. He's never been out of touch for so long." She twisted her hands in her lap, dropping her gaze from the compassionate eyes of the Jedi Knight. "When we last spoke he was furious with me. He's never been angry with me before, I thought we could work this out but if he doesn't make the effort, I don't know what I can do."
She took a deep, shaky breath. "I can't give up on him, I just can't. I love him," she looked up, her eyes sparkling with tears she refused to shed in Obi-Wan's presence. "I don't know what to do, Obi-Wan. I don't know how to get through to him. He's changed so much, so fast, its almost like he's a completely different person."
"Don't give up on him, Padmé." Obi-Wan leaned forward and gently grasped her hands, covering them with his. She wondered if he knew how easy it would be for her to follow that advice. She'd never given up on him, not before and not now. She wasn't sure she'd ever be able to.
"I couldn't give up on him, but if he doesn't come back..."
"He will." Obi-Wan's voice held a confident note, almost as if he knew something she didn't. "He loves you, but sometimes when people go through difficult times there's nothing we can do. Support him, be there for him, but don't try to stop him. Anakin will find his own path if he lets the Force guide him and that path will lead back to you."
She closed her eyes, allowing his words to wash over her. Obi-Wan was basically telling her she couldn't do anything but wait. That, more than anything, would be harder than action. She slowly opened her eyes, and nodded. "Thank you," she squeezed his hands and stood, pulling the Jedi into a sudden hug. "It might kill me to wait for him to find his way back to me, but I'll wait."
Obi-Wan returned her hug briefly before turning to leave. She didn't watch him go as she turned and headed for the balcony, leaving the security cameras off. She wanted privacy and she was going to get it. Stepping onto the balcony, she went to the rail and leaned against it, looking out across the vista of buildings and traffic.
"Are you watching me, Anakin?" she whispered softly, her voice breaking. "Do you know how much I love you?" she took a deep, bracing breath. He knew. He'd always known. And he had to come back to her. Without him she wasn't sure if she'd be able to go on. Resolving to give him the time and space he needed, to wait until he came back to her, she turned, and re- entered her suite. If time was what it would take, then that's what she would give him. Nobody would know, save Obi-Wan, exactly how much she was hurting.