Chapter 2
Michael was four weeks past his third birthday when he made me think about Cameron & my old life! Dad & Kellie came every year & stayed for a month, two weeks before his birthday & two weeks after. He adored his Grandpa & 'Gum' (he'd called Kellie 'Gum' since he knew how to talk....we don't know why but it just stuck!!) & they were at their happiest when they could come & spend time in Australia with their Grandchildren! They had been gone almost two weeks when Michael & I were having dinner over at Rhett's place one evening. "Mummy?" he asked, between mouthfulls of food! "Yes honey?" "Grandpa & Gum......do they live in Cameroon?" I laughed at his mistake! "Cameron sweetie! Now c'mon, eat up!" "Jake says that's where the Hardy Boys live!" I stopped eating, a forkful of food halfway to my mouth & stared at him in amazement! Rhett gave me a sideways glance & thankfully he quickly changed the subject! "Cameron's a big place Mike! Now, who's for ice cream?" Michael & Becky (Rhett's daughter) both cheered & the subject of the Hardy Boys seemed to be forgotten! It had completely taken me by surprise as I never let him watch the wrestling on TV! Jake was his little friend from kindergarten & obviously his parents weren't so strict with their three year old! Later that night we decided to stay over so I could have some wine & not have to worry about getting home! As I tucked Michael into bed the curiosity got the better of me! "Michael.....who are the Hardy Boys?" I asked, stroking his hair as he lay curled up under the covers. "Wrestlers!" he said enthusiastically, "Jake says they're the best!!" "Have you ever seen this wrestling honey?" "Oh sometimes.....at Jake's, his brother has a tape! Jeff has blue hair Mummy! He looks funny!!" He giggled & my heart almost stopped! Here he was talking about Jeff, talking about his own father, like some sort of little fan!! I put a hand to my mouth & looked up at the celing. "Mummy....can I grow blue hair when I'm big?" He looked up at me & I had to smile, had to hide the fact that I felt sick to my stomach & had to hide how totally terrified I was! So, I put on a big 'mommy' grin & distracted him by tickling his tummy! Jenny came in to read him & Becky a bed time story so I said my 'goodnights' and left....well more like escaped!! I went through the kitchen, pouring the biggest glass of wine, & out to join Rhett on the porch. "Blast from the past!" he said, grinning at me as I sat down. I just nodded & gulped some wine! "You looked a little erm...startled when he mentioned them in there!" "Did I? Oh well like you said, it's just not a name I've heard in a while......just took me by surprise, that's all!" "How come you never kept in touch with them, well especially Jeff? Man you two were insep..." "Leave it Rhett!" I snapped, taking another large mouthful from my wine glass!! "Ok! Ok! Just saying.......it seems a little strange, that's all!" "Nothing strange about it Rhett! We grew up, grew apart, it happens!" Later that night as I lay in bed my mind raced! I thought about Jeff a lot of the time but somehow I'd always avoided asking myself the one vital question...'how was I ever going to explain any of this to Michael?' He'd never once asked why he didn't have a Daddy like the other kids, but I guess he was getting older & the questions were bound to start! First thing I had to do was keep him away from this Jake kid! I needed time to think about this & Michael seeing Jeff on TV again wasn't going to help! The more I thought about it, the more I came to realise that there was no easy way around this situation & it was only going to get worse the longer I left it! But still I couldn't bring myself to pick up the phone after all this time & hear his voice....even the thought of it scared the living hell out of me!! I had no idea where I was going to go from there!
Michael was four weeks past his third birthday when he made me think about Cameron & my old life! Dad & Kellie came every year & stayed for a month, two weeks before his birthday & two weeks after. He adored his Grandpa & 'Gum' (he'd called Kellie 'Gum' since he knew how to talk....we don't know why but it just stuck!!) & they were at their happiest when they could come & spend time in Australia with their Grandchildren! They had been gone almost two weeks when Michael & I were having dinner over at Rhett's place one evening. "Mummy?" he asked, between mouthfulls of food! "Yes honey?" "Grandpa & Gum......do they live in Cameroon?" I laughed at his mistake! "Cameron sweetie! Now c'mon, eat up!" "Jake says that's where the Hardy Boys live!" I stopped eating, a forkful of food halfway to my mouth & stared at him in amazement! Rhett gave me a sideways glance & thankfully he quickly changed the subject! "Cameron's a big place Mike! Now, who's for ice cream?" Michael & Becky (Rhett's daughter) both cheered & the subject of the Hardy Boys seemed to be forgotten! It had completely taken me by surprise as I never let him watch the wrestling on TV! Jake was his little friend from kindergarten & obviously his parents weren't so strict with their three year old! Later that night we decided to stay over so I could have some wine & not have to worry about getting home! As I tucked Michael into bed the curiosity got the better of me! "Michael.....who are the Hardy Boys?" I asked, stroking his hair as he lay curled up under the covers. "Wrestlers!" he said enthusiastically, "Jake says they're the best!!" "Have you ever seen this wrestling honey?" "Oh sometimes.....at Jake's, his brother has a tape! Jeff has blue hair Mummy! He looks funny!!" He giggled & my heart almost stopped! Here he was talking about Jeff, talking about his own father, like some sort of little fan!! I put a hand to my mouth & looked up at the celing. "Mummy....can I grow blue hair when I'm big?" He looked up at me & I had to smile, had to hide the fact that I felt sick to my stomach & had to hide how totally terrified I was! So, I put on a big 'mommy' grin & distracted him by tickling his tummy! Jenny came in to read him & Becky a bed time story so I said my 'goodnights' and left....well more like escaped!! I went through the kitchen, pouring the biggest glass of wine, & out to join Rhett on the porch. "Blast from the past!" he said, grinning at me as I sat down. I just nodded & gulped some wine! "You looked a little erm...startled when he mentioned them in there!" "Did I? Oh well like you said, it's just not a name I've heard in a while......just took me by surprise, that's all!" "How come you never kept in touch with them, well especially Jeff? Man you two were insep..." "Leave it Rhett!" I snapped, taking another large mouthful from my wine glass!! "Ok! Ok! Just saying.......it seems a little strange, that's all!" "Nothing strange about it Rhett! We grew up, grew apart, it happens!" Later that night as I lay in bed my mind raced! I thought about Jeff a lot of the time but somehow I'd always avoided asking myself the one vital question...'how was I ever going to explain any of this to Michael?' He'd never once asked why he didn't have a Daddy like the other kids, but I guess he was getting older & the questions were bound to start! First thing I had to do was keep him away from this Jake kid! I needed time to think about this & Michael seeing Jeff on TV again wasn't going to help! The more I thought about it, the more I came to realise that there was no easy way around this situation & it was only going to get worse the longer I left it! But still I couldn't bring myself to pick up the phone after all this time & hear his voice....even the thought of it scared the living hell out of me!! I had no idea where I was going to go from there!