Chapter 4
A few weeks went by & still I had done nothing! It tore me apart every time Michael & his friends played with those damn figures! Pieces of moulded plastic.....yet to weird to comprehend! The image flashed into my mind over & over that this should be real, Michael had the right to know his Dad! What I had never even considdered until then was what about Jeff? Didn't he have the right to know he had a son for Christ's sake? Didn't he have the right to decide for himself whether or not he wanted to be a part of Michael's life? I wasn't giving him a choice, I was being selfish to everyone! What about Gilbert? He was a grandfather & he never even knew it! Matt was an uncle....they deserved better than this! A tear rolled down my cheek as I lay in bed with these thoughts bombarding my brain like bullets! I hadn't cried over Jeff, not since the day Michael was born & I had made a promise to myself never to cry over him again! Somehow I had managed to harden myself to my emotions, punch them down whenever they threatened to rear up! How the hell can three pieces of plastic destroy all the defenses I'd speant so much time building up around me?! It was almost laughable - a twenty dollar toy that was threatning to upheave my entire life!! "Jesus!" I said out loud in the darkness, "What is this? The return of Chucky!!?" I let out a laugh but then the tears threatened to come again. I blinked them away, clutching tightly to the sheet on my bed & biting my lip! It was going to take more than a damn toy to crack me...I was sure of it!! ******* I was still lying there wide awake & staring up at the moon through the open curtains of my bedroom window, when the phone rang. I sat up in bed, jolted from my thoughts & quickly glanced at the clock, it was 4am. I grabbed the phone in a daze, worrying more about it waking Michael than who would be calling me at that time in the morning!! It turned out to be Greg. Dad was sick, in hospital, he'd had a heart attack! My mind went into overdrive, thinking of the million things that neded to be done! When I'd hung up on Greg I called Rhett, close to panick, not knowing what to do first! ******* The next few hours were like a whirlwind & before I knew it, Rhett, Michael & myself were on a plane to America! Jenny had offered to keep Michael there with her & Becky but I couldn't leave him! All I kept thinking was if Dad dies I would always regret not taking him to see his Grandpa one last time! The fact that I was going back to Cameron didn't really hit me until we were pulling up in a taxi outside the old house where I grew up! I stepped out onto the driveway & my stomach lurched. I never in my wildest dreams expected to be standing outside this house again! Greg came out to help us with the bags but as soon as he saw Michael he swept him up into his arms & carried him inside instead....we carried our own bags!! When I stepped through the door & into the kitchen I got a chill down my spine! I looked around in disbelief to see nothing had changed at all! Maybe a coat of paint here & there, but everything else remained frozen, in a time warp! I was shaken from my thoughts by Pat holding me tightly. When I realised it was him I threw my arms around him & held him, the tears streaming down my face! It had been five months since I'd last seen him, his tennis is demanding & takes him all over the world.....it felt so good to be in his arms again! When we went to the hospital I did leave Michael behind. He'd had such a long day he'd fallen asleep on the couch so Greg's fiance, Louise, stayed behind to look after him. Kellie looked like she had aged 10 years in just a few weeks & it scared me to see her like that! When we went in to see Dad he was wired to machines, but concious & he looked for the first time to me like an old man! It made me realise his mortality.......I always thought my Dad would be around forever! Doesn't most of us think that way? 'My dad, the superhero?' At that moment the realisation that he wasn't indestructable hit me like a brick! On the bright side he had a smile for us all as we kissed him in turn & he did talk for a little while but quickly got tired. While we were there, test result upon test result came flooding in...none of them made much sense but the doctor explained what we all needed to hear! This time Dad's super powers had saved the day! He would be ok, as long as took it easy & ate healthier! I don't think I've ever been so relieved, so thankful to God for anything in my life! We all assured him we would still be there, at 'home' when he got out of hospital & that we'd visit every day until then! We were on our way out to the parking lot when I saw Gilbert comming the other way along the corridor! My first instinct was to run, get out of there & I frantically looked left & right for a place to hide before I got a hold on my panick! As soon as he saw me his face brightened & he threw his arms around me....I had to admit it was good to see him again, even if I was terrified & hadn't a clue what I was meant to say to him! It was basically small-talk & he was really happy to hear about Dad's improvement! Just before he went in to see his best friend he squeezed my hands. "Can I come & see you......and little Michael maybe....tomorrow perhaps?" his eyes twinkled with excitement! "Oh....er....yes! Yes I'd like that Gilbert!" He kissed me on the cheek & we went our seperate ways, for now anyway!
A few weeks went by & still I had done nothing! It tore me apart every time Michael & his friends played with those damn figures! Pieces of moulded plastic.....yet to weird to comprehend! The image flashed into my mind over & over that this should be real, Michael had the right to know his Dad! What I had never even considdered until then was what about Jeff? Didn't he have the right to know he had a son for Christ's sake? Didn't he have the right to decide for himself whether or not he wanted to be a part of Michael's life? I wasn't giving him a choice, I was being selfish to everyone! What about Gilbert? He was a grandfather & he never even knew it! Matt was an uncle....they deserved better than this! A tear rolled down my cheek as I lay in bed with these thoughts bombarding my brain like bullets! I hadn't cried over Jeff, not since the day Michael was born & I had made a promise to myself never to cry over him again! Somehow I had managed to harden myself to my emotions, punch them down whenever they threatened to rear up! How the hell can three pieces of plastic destroy all the defenses I'd speant so much time building up around me?! It was almost laughable - a twenty dollar toy that was threatning to upheave my entire life!! "Jesus!" I said out loud in the darkness, "What is this? The return of Chucky!!?" I let out a laugh but then the tears threatened to come again. I blinked them away, clutching tightly to the sheet on my bed & biting my lip! It was going to take more than a damn toy to crack me...I was sure of it!! ******* I was still lying there wide awake & staring up at the moon through the open curtains of my bedroom window, when the phone rang. I sat up in bed, jolted from my thoughts & quickly glanced at the clock, it was 4am. I grabbed the phone in a daze, worrying more about it waking Michael than who would be calling me at that time in the morning!! It turned out to be Greg. Dad was sick, in hospital, he'd had a heart attack! My mind went into overdrive, thinking of the million things that neded to be done! When I'd hung up on Greg I called Rhett, close to panick, not knowing what to do first! ******* The next few hours were like a whirlwind & before I knew it, Rhett, Michael & myself were on a plane to America! Jenny had offered to keep Michael there with her & Becky but I couldn't leave him! All I kept thinking was if Dad dies I would always regret not taking him to see his Grandpa one last time! The fact that I was going back to Cameron didn't really hit me until we were pulling up in a taxi outside the old house where I grew up! I stepped out onto the driveway & my stomach lurched. I never in my wildest dreams expected to be standing outside this house again! Greg came out to help us with the bags but as soon as he saw Michael he swept him up into his arms & carried him inside instead....we carried our own bags!! When I stepped through the door & into the kitchen I got a chill down my spine! I looked around in disbelief to see nothing had changed at all! Maybe a coat of paint here & there, but everything else remained frozen, in a time warp! I was shaken from my thoughts by Pat holding me tightly. When I realised it was him I threw my arms around him & held him, the tears streaming down my face! It had been five months since I'd last seen him, his tennis is demanding & takes him all over the world.....it felt so good to be in his arms again! When we went to the hospital I did leave Michael behind. He'd had such a long day he'd fallen asleep on the couch so Greg's fiance, Louise, stayed behind to look after him. Kellie looked like she had aged 10 years in just a few weeks & it scared me to see her like that! When we went in to see Dad he was wired to machines, but concious & he looked for the first time to me like an old man! It made me realise his mortality.......I always thought my Dad would be around forever! Doesn't most of us think that way? 'My dad, the superhero?' At that moment the realisation that he wasn't indestructable hit me like a brick! On the bright side he had a smile for us all as we kissed him in turn & he did talk for a little while but quickly got tired. While we were there, test result upon test result came flooding in...none of them made much sense but the doctor explained what we all needed to hear! This time Dad's super powers had saved the day! He would be ok, as long as took it easy & ate healthier! I don't think I've ever been so relieved, so thankful to God for anything in my life! We all assured him we would still be there, at 'home' when he got out of hospital & that we'd visit every day until then! We were on our way out to the parking lot when I saw Gilbert comming the other way along the corridor! My first instinct was to run, get out of there & I frantically looked left & right for a place to hide before I got a hold on my panick! As soon as he saw me his face brightened & he threw his arms around me....I had to admit it was good to see him again, even if I was terrified & hadn't a clue what I was meant to say to him! It was basically small-talk & he was really happy to hear about Dad's improvement! Just before he went in to see his best friend he squeezed my hands. "Can I come & see you......and little Michael maybe....tomorrow perhaps?" his eyes twinkled with excitement! "Oh....er....yes! Yes I'd like that Gilbert!" He kissed me on the cheek & we went our seperate ways, for now anyway!