If Only...

~*~Chapter Three: Why me?~*~

Tom walked around for the next couple of weeks in a daze. He didn't care he was failing, he didn't care that he was snapping at anybody who even looked at him. All he could think of was how him and Fiona were going to marry, the life they could of had...

Tom saw Fiona run up to him. She had a huge smile on her face and he couldn't help but feel unconditional love for her. As he waited for her to reach him he noticed his hand holding his wand towards her. He tried to put it back down but it would not obey. Then he heard himself say "Avada Kevedra". He tried and tried to will himself to obey, but saw an amazing flash of green light emanate from his wand and hit Fiona full blast. She fell over in the blast and Tom, finally able to do something, ran up to her and practically fell down to her. He lay his head on her chest and began to sob. He screamed for someone to help but found himself all alone. His dream started to fade away and tried to keep hold on Fiona, maybe she would come back to reality with him. But it was no use.

Tom awoke in a cold sweat. He went to the bathroom and looked in the mirror, seeing tear lines on his face. This had been how he had been waking up since she died. And it was the same dream every time.

He wasn't stupid. He realised he blamed himself for her death, and the dreams were just confirming that. If he hadn't tried to stop that thief, it would never try to kill him, and Fiona would never try to save him. It was all his fault. He might as well of done it himself, like in the dream.

He was in transfiguration with Professor Dumbledore when the headmaster came to the door.

"May I borrow Mr.Riddle for a moment, professor?"

"Yes of course." Dumbledore replied uncertainly.

Tom started walking down the hallways towards the headmaster's office. Not a word was spoken between them. Tom had little idea what he was going to say, he just knew it was about Fiona. They reached his office and he motioned Tom to sit in the chair parallel to his.

"Now Tom, I know Ms. Athelstane's death has been very hard on you. It's been hard on all of us. And I'm quite aware your having many sleepless nights over it. Now, I'm willing to offer you some sleeping potion which will relieve you of your nightmares. But Tom, you are started to slip grade-wise. You used to be a grade A student, a excellent prefect, but now you're pulling C's at best and you're disregarding your prefect duties. If you do not catch up soon, I'm afraid you might not get that head boy position."

"Oh professor, I know I am slipping, but I can't help it. I can't get my mind off her sir."

"I understand what you are going through. And I am considering excusing you from exams at the end of the year."

"Sir, I think that is extremely unfair to the rest of the school. I will take exams."

"Alright Tom, I must say, you are showing quite a lot of courage. You are excused."

Tom left the office with the bottle of sleeping potion he was given. He roamed the halls thinking about how he might lose head boy position, how he is pulling C's at best, he couldn't understand how his life went from perfect to awful in a mere couple of weeks.

Later that evening, before Tom was going to sleep, he remembered the sleeping potion. He gulped it down hoping to get the day over with as soon as possible. He felt his eyes getting heavy and drifted into dreamless sleep.

Tom was standing in the middle of Hogwarts grounds. It was a beautiful day, the grass and sky colours were even more radiant than real life. He looked around. There were no people. Except for one. He saw them walking towards them, not at a run, more like a walk. This person had the most grace he'd ever seen, and you couldn't help but stare when you watched them walk. As she (he could tell from the body features) walked closer, he realised who it was.

"Fiona?"

"Hello Tom."

"I don't understand, I took sleep potion, this is supposed to be a dreamless sleep."

"This isn't a dream."

"What do you mean?"

"Tom, I know how you are blaming yourself. It wasn't your fault. I know you love me, and I love you. I saved your life because I love you so much. You didn't cause that wizard to perform that spell on me. It was my time, Tom. Please don't blame yourself."

While she talked, though very much concentrated on her words, Tom couldn't help but notice how beautiful she looked. Her hair was shining almost with a heavenly glow, and it hung on either side of her chest, as well as her back. She was wearing a white dress that tightened around the body, but the part below the waist was long and billowing. Her sleeves were tight around the upper part of her harm, and became wider to the point of her wrists.

"Wait, Fiona, are you an-"

"An angel, yes." She smiled and it reached every feature of her face.

"I should of known. You've always been my angel, but know you've actually became one, in the flesh."

"Tom, I cannot stay. But I just wanted you to know, I'm always watching you. I love you, Tom."

"I love you too Fiona, my angel."

After tom finished what he said, Fiona cupped his face in her hands. Her hands were warm, and spread happiness throughout his body. He slowly leaned in to kiss her. She did not hesitate, and now he was positively ecstatic with joy. Her lips were even warmer than her hands, and she tasted like sugar. He broke the kiss off, and she smiled again. Then she turned, and Tom noticed something on her back. She had wings. She walked off as he wished he could still be kissing her. When he couldn't see her go any longer, he ran up to her, swiftly turned her around and kissed her again, much more passionately. He again broke away the kiss as he felt himself stir...

Tom awoke with a start. The boys in his dormitory were making quite a loud racket playing Exploding Snap. The joyful mood Tom was in in the dream had left, and anger filled him again. Why did she come? It wasn't fair. He wanted her so badly. He looked around at his dorm mates. He decided to go to the library.

He was in the mood for some dark reading. Being the clever boy he was, he made up an excuse to go to the restricted section. Then he had an idea. He frantically searched through the books for anything concerning Avada Kedevra. Then he found it. 'Dark Curses'. He grabbed the book and walked to a table. He couldn't go to their table. He just couldn't.

For many weeks, Tom delved into the world of dark magic. He quickly became interested. He wanted to try these curses. He would punish the world for taking his Fiona away...

~*~The End~*~