Bakura's Guide To Fighting...Dirty

By: Neko-chan



A/N: Well, minna-san, here it is. Ryou's point of view on how to fight dirty. Question, though! Does Ryou even know _how_ to fight dirty? I mean...it's Ryou, for Kami's sake.

Bakura: *snorts* Aibou disappoints me in so many ways.

*cackles* Oh, this is going to be good.

Ryou: *nods happily* Yes, I know that it is, Neko-chan-san!!

*realizes that Ryou doesn't know that she's being sarcastic and mocking* o.o;; Ummmm...yeah, Ryou. Whatever you say. *shakes her head sadly* I'd hate to do this, but I think I'm going to have to agree with Bakura on this one, Ryou. (And to everyone who wants Bakura to take over the Guide again...just wait, he will...eventually.)





There is one thing about my yami that I just can't understand. He's very violent and he _enjoys_ being violent. I think that besides robbing tombs, Bakura's favorite thing to do is cause trouble. He actually _likes_ fighting. I wouldn't mind this so much, but see, the thing is... Most of the bullies that pick on me are mad because of a fight that Bakura _caused_.

And then Bakura wants to teach me how to fight _dirty_! I just don't get yami sometimes...

I mean, Yuugi's yami doesn't try to teach him how to fight dirty! All Yuugi's yami does is "Mind Crush" his bullies. I wouldn't want my yami to "Mind Crush" my bullies, but trying to teach me how to fight dirty seems a little low, don't you think?

I mean, why fight at all? You could easily run away AND it would take less energy to run away than to fight. So why bother fighting?

Take this scenario: You're cornered by a bully (and no, this is not the same bully in each example) and you want to get away without fighting. If you're short enough, you can dodge between his legs and run for all you're worth. Or, if you're fast enough, you can dodge between the bully's legs and tie his shoelaces together. That way, when you run he won't be able to follow. He'll be stuck in one spot and you'll have the time to safely get away. Ingenious, ne?

If Bakura was here, he'd probably try and come up with some sneaky little plan to kick the bully's butt AND make him look like a fool---all at that same time.

It's either that, or he'd be ranting about why some certain aibous don't call their yamis. (Gee, with Bakura as a yami, I wonder why I don't like calling him from his Ring. Maybe it's because of the fact that he'd try to KILL the bully? Just a guess, though...)

But, to get to the point---why fight at all? Violence only leads to more violence and it becomes a never-ending circle. How can we get along if we're all constantly fighting. We shouldn't be fighting at all!!!***

Peace would be the best thing we could all hope to achieve. Peace should be what we should all strive for. But...how can we all achieve peace if we have...MONSTROSITIES...like yami's "Bakura's Guide To Fighting...Dirty" in our world.

How can people actually READ that Guide and actually _take heart_ from my...my _yami's_ advice?! It's my _yami_, for Kami's sake! I love him like a brother and I know that in his own twisted way he cares for me. But he LOCKED ME IN A CARD!!! How can someone who locks a person in a card actually be considered _sane_?! Seriously. And people are actually _listening_ to his advice?! I just can't understand some people. Why do you want violence when peace should be the solution? And, another thing---



Ryou, that's enough out of you.

Ryou: Nani?! But I was just getting started! *pouts*

And you can _continue_ in the next chapter...or until Bakura gets his Guide back. Whichever comes first. *blinks* And, speaking of Bakura, where is he?

Ryou: Huh?

Bakura: zzzZZzzZzZz... *fell asleep listening to Ryou's peace rant*

*wishes she could join Baku-chan*

Ryou: Nani? No one likes _my_ guide? ;_;

Ummm...let's let the readers decide, Ryou-chan. *sweatdrops*



So. Who thinks that we should let Ryou continue his own little guide for a couple more chapters or should we just duct tape his mouth shut, lock him in a closet, and let Bakura continue the guide? Remember: Your votes matter. ^_~

And I'm still trying to decide which Guide to do. Almost everyone wants to have me do a guide on how to become better than a certain pharaoh no baka. But the cooking guide and the evading the wrath of yami yuugi are tied. You guys aren't going to make me do all three, are you? x.x;;

***LOL. Remind you of someone? Like a certain albino Arabian from Gundam Wing? That also goes by the name of Quatre? *innocent grin*