Nine Orange Airplanes
by yumeneko
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Disclaimer once more... Minekura-sama owns everything.
Author's notes: He he... try to figure out whose POV am I writing in!
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Chapter 1: There is warmth...
I watched Hakkai as he healed my wounds again. We ran into another band of annoying demons and eventually, I got hurt in the battle... Hakkai was looking kind. There was something about him that I couldn't explain, this familiar kindness... No one but Komyo Sanzo has given me such kindness... But look at him... He was like some sort of healing angel. After holding my wounded arm and covering me with the sheets, he sat there watching me. His hand was overlapping mine and he looked at our hands as if there was something precious there.
All I wanted to know was... Was I that precious one?
Either way, Hakkai closed his eyes as he murmured a poem. It was only now that I've heard him speak in verse. It was lovely. His murmurs were of peace and sunshine and not of this journey we were on. It was sweet. The sound of the poem. But then, as he ended it, he smiled and kissed my forehead just like what Komyo did when I was a child...
Yes... When I was a child... He was the only one who truly cared. He dare not call me names or such. He treated me like a son. But to Hakkai...
I guess I was more than that...
Maybe that small kiss was meant to be something more...
Something more...
Maybe I may not be as cold and aloof as everyone says I am...
After all...
All I ever needed was someone to care...
All I ever needed was some warmth to melt this ice...
All I wanted to know was that I was needed in this world not as a monk...
But a person. As me. As who I am. Not as who I seem to be.
--
I close the door silently behind me and stare at the orange paper plane in my hands. It has been a long time since I had ever created something this gentle... Something so fragile...
Yes... Sanzo was like that to me... As fragile as ice that shatters when it hits the rocky ground.
That poem... all I ever wanted to have was all in that. A peaceful life... Just to be with Sanzo... He needs me. Although I do sense that Goku needs him, too. I do admit, if I wasn't there, everything would be over. If I let Sanzo down, everything goes down with him. This is a vicious cycle of love... The way that I need Gojyo, the way that Sanzo needs me, the way Goku needs Sanzo. I just need someone to care for...
And that is you, Sanzo.
I wished I could have laid my lips on yours. But I was afraid...
Afraid there was someone out there who had taken your heart first. But I don't mind. Since I know... and I'll never forget...
--
There is warmth...
Even in the coldest of people...
There is warmth...
And I needed more of that warmth. I needed Hakkai so badly. I could have simply cried out his name and bring him here to hold me tight and treat me as a person. I just needed him so damn badly... But for now, all I have is this orange paper in my hands.
Komyo... onegai... tell me what to do... tell me what to say... For there is someone here so like you...