A little tribute to the Season 6 episode "Coming Home", to the tune of "Ballad of John and Yoko", with apologies to the Beatles.
You can find the original lyrics here: http://www.stevesbeatles.com/songs/the_ballad_of_john_and_yoko.asp
COMING HOME: The ballad of Xena and Ares
Standing in the forest beside him
Trying not to look at his hands
The panic attack said
You've got to go back
You know you have a one-in-a-billion chance
'Cause I know it ain't easy
I know how hard it would be
He may be a mortal
But he is still bad for me
Finally managed to mutter a greeting
Feeling all the cuts on his face
Maybe I oughta say
Hey, you can make it okay
But no, I didn't even give us a chance
'Cause I know it ain't easy
I know how hard it would be
Even now as a mortal
Oh, he always gets to me
Walked alone down from the Amazons hillside
Tossed and turned in bed for a week
Gabrielle frowned and asked,
Sure it was for the best?
I said c'mon now, would you give it a rest
'Cause you know it ain't easy
You know how hard it would be
He may be a mortal
But he is still bad for me
Saving people, fighting for the Greater Good
Far too many wrongs to remedy
Last night a kid said
The gods that are dead,
Xena, did they have human souls? Yes
No more lightning flashes to watch for
Somewhere, he's a mortal like me
Gabrielle sighed and said
He's still in your head
You know that's how it always will be
'Course I know it ain't easy
I know how hard it would be
But no matter what happens
You know you'll always have me
Caught the rumour that he's in Athens
Gabby smiled and gave me my pack
Said, I bought you a dress
Here, I wish you successs
I expect to see the both of you back
'Cause I know it ain't easy
But nothing worthwhile can be
It's time to get going
Or you will never be free.
16 August 2002
You can find the original lyrics here: http://www.stevesbeatles.com/songs/the_ballad_of_john_and_yoko.asp
COMING HOME: The ballad of Xena and Ares
Standing in the forest beside him
Trying not to look at his hands
The panic attack said
You've got to go back
You know you have a one-in-a-billion chance
'Cause I know it ain't easy
I know how hard it would be
He may be a mortal
But he is still bad for me
Finally managed to mutter a greeting
Feeling all the cuts on his face
Maybe I oughta say
Hey, you can make it okay
But no, I didn't even give us a chance
'Cause I know it ain't easy
I know how hard it would be
Even now as a mortal
Oh, he always gets to me
Walked alone down from the Amazons hillside
Tossed and turned in bed for a week
Gabrielle frowned and asked,
Sure it was for the best?
I said c'mon now, would you give it a rest
'Cause you know it ain't easy
You know how hard it would be
He may be a mortal
But he is still bad for me
Saving people, fighting for the Greater Good
Far too many wrongs to remedy
Last night a kid said
The gods that are dead,
Xena, did they have human souls? Yes
No more lightning flashes to watch for
Somewhere, he's a mortal like me
Gabrielle sighed and said
He's still in your head
You know that's how it always will be
'Course I know it ain't easy
I know how hard it would be
But no matter what happens
You know you'll always have me
Caught the rumour that he's in Athens
Gabby smiled and gave me my pack
Said, I bought you a dress
Here, I wish you successs
I expect to see the both of you back
'Cause I know it ain't easy
But nothing worthwhile can be
It's time to get going
Or you will never be free.
16 August 2002