Chapter 4 – The cause of it all.
Me.
Huh? You say?
Me. I'm the cause of it all.
What all? Read on, and you shall find the answer you seek.
"Zell's Angel! What's wrong with you these days? You do not heed me when I call out your name! It is only when I scream at the top of my lungs that you merely throw me a sidelong glance! Is there really so much on your mind that you can't even spare me a second's attention?" Seifer's Angel was clearly exasperated with my attitude towards him. If I do not look at him soon, he'll be shaking me like a gambler shakes his dice at the casino.
"Fine. What is it you desire?" I impatiently turn on my heel and looked at him with an intensive glare.
"ZA, you've been acting really strange lately, and I'm not the only one who noticed it. Heck… anyone who isn't blind will notice it! Look at you! Your appearance is so run-down, your feathers all but dropping off from your wings! The ones that are left have turned grey from grubbiness! What is the thing that's troubling you so? If you don't mind, you can tell me! After all, haven't we been good friends ever since we were little kids? And haven't I always treated you like a younger sister? What kind of brother would I be if you couldn't turn to me for help when you obviously need it? "
"I mind, Seifer's Angel. Even if it's true that we share a good relationship, there are times when I'm entitled to my own secrets. And that time is now. I do not want to tell you what it is that troubles me. There? Are you satisfied?" I replied coldly, turning back to my previous position.
How can I tell you, if even I do not know what's wrong?
He gripped my arm with such a force that I couldn't help gasping at the pain.
"Like it or not, you will tell me. Don't make me force you, Zell's Angel!"
A tad surprised at his violence, then a flash of fury.
"Unhand me, you barbarian! It hurts! Do you not respect my wishes to keep things to myself?"
"Listen to you! You never speak in proper language unless you're truly feeling down! Is it so hard to share your pain or whatever it is? Even if it were just a little, it would still feel much better than cooping it all inside!"
"NO! LEAVE ME BE!!!" I shouted and turned around, shutting out every word he said. I simply enclosed myself in an impenetrable glass bubble.
He looked at me a little while longer, and finally flung his hands in the air. Maybe he was giving up on me. I was infamous for my stubbornness, and he knew it all too well.
It more or less affected his performance and concentration, I guess. Which was the main reason for Seifer falling under Ultimecia's influence. If he had used all of his powers, there was no reason that Seifer's Angel would lose to Ultimecia!
I had heard about the news from Squall's Angel… a stone-faced girl much like her Master himself. She was quivering with rage, a little out of character, when she told me about Seifer's Angel. A part of it was directed at Ultimecia, and a part directed at me. There was no secret which Angel she had a liking for.
"Seifer's Angel was injured so severely… it isn't known if he would survive! And YOU know whose fault it was!" She poked me with the sharp nail of her index finger, causing me to stumble back a little.
Which was why… I said… I was the cause of it all. Go on, you can hate me. It was fortunate that Squall's Angel did not spread around the cause of SA's injury… or I would have been expelled from the Land of Angels long ago. I suppose that she didn't care too much about the price I should have paid for it. But I did.
I hated myself for a long time.