WuFei's True Self
By: ArtemisFowlCM May/June 2000
WuFei: Must love jackals. Must love jackals. Kill Treize. Kill Treize. (He sits Indian Style twiddling his thumbs in a dazed look.) Duo: u oak-ay mann? WuFei: MUST LOVE JACKALS! MUST LOVE JACKALS! KILL TREIZE! KILL TREIZE! Duo: snapp ootta itt mann! WuFei: Shut up Bluo! Shout up Bluo! (Still dazed and twiddling his thumbs.) Duo: oak-ay! i'mm juust goonna wallk awway! (He has little sweat drops forming on his face as he slowly backs up with his hands in front of himself.) WuFei: Dance with Jackals! Dance with Jackals! Duo: eeeeekkkkk! crazzed chinnese boi! WuFei: Shut up Bluo! Shut up Bluo! Duo: Shoot uup! Shoot uup Wuffey! (He imitates WuFei by walking around the room in a dazed look twiddling his thumbs.* or is he just being himself, I'm completely not sure! * He stops and slaps WuFei across the face. WuFei stands up and bites Duo. Duo runs away and brings back Trowa. He wants Trowa to check for rabies.) Trowa: (With a whip, a stool, and a top hat.) Back! Back you Jackal! WuFei: (Growling.) Bark! Bark! (Trowa drops the whip as he runs away with Duo, screaming.) Trowa: At least he doesn't have rabies! Well, yet that is! WuFei: Must get steak! Must get steak! (He runs on all fours to Heero & Relena's BBQ. WuFei crawls up next to Heero who is grilling steak.) WuFei: Grrrr! Bark! Bark! Heero: (Pats WuFei on the head.) Good Jackal. (He tosses a steak to the ground.) WuFei: (Running off pretty proud of himself, stops at the side walk to eat his steak. He finishes it and barks in happiness.) Bark! Bark! Lady on the Street: Ah shut up ya dumb dog! (WuFei bites her.) Aaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh! Rabid dog! Mad dog! Rabid dog! Mad dog! (Locks herself in the phone booth as WuFei paws the door and growls. She phones the dogcatcher. The dogcatcher shows up instantly in his truck.) Dogcatcher: That's no dog ma'am! That there's a class A, free range, Mental Chinese Boy! But, I'll lock him up with the other one anyway! (He throws WuFei in the back of the truck and drops him and the other one off at the Mental Institution. WuFei is given and suited up in a lovely white jacket and thrown into a padded room were they play soft music all day.) WuFei: Bark! Bark! Kill Treize! Kille Treize! Shut up Bluo! Shut up Bluo! Must love Jackals! Must love Jackals! Dance with Jackals! Dance with Jackals! (He sits in the usual position with the usual dazed look.) ~- A Few Minutes Later -~ Duo: whhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! i dunn wannnnnna goo bacck en der agaiin! i on- ly escapped oncce orr twiice! Guard: That's only cuz you ate the bars! But now there's a 5ft plastic window! Besides you got a new friend next door! Duo: wwwhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! waiit! aa niew friiend? (They lock him up in the cell next door to WuFei who still has his fashionable white jacket on. WuFei starts to hurl himself against the wall between himself and Duo. Duo is still screaming 'whhaaa.') WuFei: (Screaming.) AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH! SHUT UP BLUO! SHUT UP BLUO! Duo: wwhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! u shoot ooop wuffey! END Are they any good? They gotta be if your still readin' em! BEWARE! STILL MORE INSANE BIZZARE RANDOMNESS TO COME! MWHA HA HA HA! I dun own these ppl they arent mine they belong 2 someone.dun hurt me ok
WuFei: Must love jackals. Must love jackals. Kill Treize. Kill Treize. (He sits Indian Style twiddling his thumbs in a dazed look.) Duo: u oak-ay mann? WuFei: MUST LOVE JACKALS! MUST LOVE JACKALS! KILL TREIZE! KILL TREIZE! Duo: snapp ootta itt mann! WuFei: Shut up Bluo! Shout up Bluo! (Still dazed and twiddling his thumbs.) Duo: oak-ay! i'mm juust goonna wallk awway! (He has little sweat drops forming on his face as he slowly backs up with his hands in front of himself.) WuFei: Dance with Jackals! Dance with Jackals! Duo: eeeeekkkkk! crazzed chinnese boi! WuFei: Shut up Bluo! Shut up Bluo! Duo: Shoot uup! Shoot uup Wuffey! (He imitates WuFei by walking around the room in a dazed look twiddling his thumbs.* or is he just being himself, I'm completely not sure! * He stops and slaps WuFei across the face. WuFei stands up and bites Duo. Duo runs away and brings back Trowa. He wants Trowa to check for rabies.) Trowa: (With a whip, a stool, and a top hat.) Back! Back you Jackal! WuFei: (Growling.) Bark! Bark! (Trowa drops the whip as he runs away with Duo, screaming.) Trowa: At least he doesn't have rabies! Well, yet that is! WuFei: Must get steak! Must get steak! (He runs on all fours to Heero & Relena's BBQ. WuFei crawls up next to Heero who is grilling steak.) WuFei: Grrrr! Bark! Bark! Heero: (Pats WuFei on the head.) Good Jackal. (He tosses a steak to the ground.) WuFei: (Running off pretty proud of himself, stops at the side walk to eat his steak. He finishes it and barks in happiness.) Bark! Bark! Lady on the Street: Ah shut up ya dumb dog! (WuFei bites her.) Aaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh! Rabid dog! Mad dog! Rabid dog! Mad dog! (Locks herself in the phone booth as WuFei paws the door and growls. She phones the dogcatcher. The dogcatcher shows up instantly in his truck.) Dogcatcher: That's no dog ma'am! That there's a class A, free range, Mental Chinese Boy! But, I'll lock him up with the other one anyway! (He throws WuFei in the back of the truck and drops him and the other one off at the Mental Institution. WuFei is given and suited up in a lovely white jacket and thrown into a padded room were they play soft music all day.) WuFei: Bark! Bark! Kill Treize! Kille Treize! Shut up Bluo! Shut up Bluo! Must love Jackals! Must love Jackals! Dance with Jackals! Dance with Jackals! (He sits in the usual position with the usual dazed look.) ~- A Few Minutes Later -~ Duo: whhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! i dunn wannnnnna goo bacck en der agaiin! i on- ly escapped oncce orr twiice! Guard: That's only cuz you ate the bars! But now there's a 5ft plastic window! Besides you got a new friend next door! Duo: wwwhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! waiit! aa niew friiend? (They lock him up in the cell next door to WuFei who still has his fashionable white jacket on. WuFei starts to hurl himself against the wall between himself and Duo. Duo is still screaming 'whhaaa.') WuFei: (Screaming.) AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH! SHUT UP BLUO! SHUT UP BLUO! Duo: wwhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! u shoot ooop wuffey! END Are they any good? They gotta be if your still readin' em! BEWARE! STILL MORE INSANE BIZZARE RANDOMNESS TO COME! MWHA HA HA HA! I dun own these ppl they arent mine they belong 2 someone.dun hurt me ok