The moment I stepped outside Faith's door that night, I knew things were
different.
Different as in good different. So much had happened over the past
months...I'd shut
down inside, blocking out the world. I'd shut out a lot of people who I
now knew cared
about what happened to me...Faith and Sully being just two. Most
importantly, I'd
shut out my ma. I'd hurt her and I knew it. They say, whoever 'they' are,
that a mother's
love in unconditional. I was about to find out.
I drove to ma's bar where I found her sitting out front, almost as if she were expecting me. The bar was quiet, except for a few party-goers in the back. I ignored them taking a seat next to ma.
She immediately got up, went behind the bar, grabbed a glass and a bottle of beer, setting them on the counter in front of me. We sat in there for what seemed like forever; a couple beers and the silence being the only things we had in common.
"I'm sorry ma," I finally said, not looking her in the eye.
She forgave me for the lack of eye contact. I guess its true that mothers just know things.
"Are you alright?" she finally asked.
I replied with a simple 'yeah'. After a minute to think, I figured I owed her more of an explanation than that.
"I talked to Faith tonight," I explained as she turned, placing her hand on mine. "I think we're going to be okay." I don't know what it was but for some reason just the idea that I'd talked to Faith seemed to make her feel better. Must be some kind of a mother connection.
"You worried me Maurice," she added unexpectedly. "I was watching the TV when those buildings came down. I thought I'd lost you."
"I'm fine ma, really," I tried to reassure her.
"Now, but what about then?" she countered. "You should have called me."
If I'd learned anything as a result of these past months, I knew it was pointless to argue, especially when it's with someone I care about.
"You're right ma," I agreed with her. "I'm sorry."
Maybe that was all she needed to hear from me or maybe she was just surprised that I didn't argue with her. Either way, I knew that just like me and Faith, ma and I were going to be okay.
I sat there awhile longer, talking with ma. The conversation took a surprising turn at one point. I realized that there was one more person I needed to talk to that night. Maybe more for ma than for myself. Then again, maybe for the both of us.
I drove to ma's bar where I found her sitting out front, almost as if she were expecting me. The bar was quiet, except for a few party-goers in the back. I ignored them taking a seat next to ma.
She immediately got up, went behind the bar, grabbed a glass and a bottle of beer, setting them on the counter in front of me. We sat in there for what seemed like forever; a couple beers and the silence being the only things we had in common.
"I'm sorry ma," I finally said, not looking her in the eye.
She forgave me for the lack of eye contact. I guess its true that mothers just know things.
"Are you alright?" she finally asked.
I replied with a simple 'yeah'. After a minute to think, I figured I owed her more of an explanation than that.
"I talked to Faith tonight," I explained as she turned, placing her hand on mine. "I think we're going to be okay." I don't know what it was but for some reason just the idea that I'd talked to Faith seemed to make her feel better. Must be some kind of a mother connection.
"You worried me Maurice," she added unexpectedly. "I was watching the TV when those buildings came down. I thought I'd lost you."
"I'm fine ma, really," I tried to reassure her.
"Now, but what about then?" she countered. "You should have called me."
If I'd learned anything as a result of these past months, I knew it was pointless to argue, especially when it's with someone I care about.
"You're right ma," I agreed with her. "I'm sorry."
Maybe that was all she needed to hear from me or maybe she was just surprised that I didn't argue with her. Either way, I knew that just like me and Faith, ma and I were going to be okay.
I sat there awhile longer, talking with ma. The conversation took a surprising turn at one point. I realized that there was one more person I needed to talk to that night. Maybe more for ma than for myself. Then again, maybe for the both of us.