Obligatory disclaimers: I do not own Tenchi Muyo or any of the characters contained there in. I do not own Batman or any of the characters contained there in. The characters are the intellectual property of their respective creators. No profits are being made from this fanfic and it's sole intention is bring (possible) enjoyment to those who read it.
Look both ways before crossing the street. Don't accept either candy or rides from strangers. And your mileage may vary.
Thank you and please enjoy the story.
Tenchi meets The Joker
by Weirdbard
Chapter 6. Training and ambush. What an afternoon.
Ayeka carefully smoothed out her kimono style gown and sat herself down on the grassy courtyard of the temple. Looking around, she noted that Ryoko was no where in sight.
"I guess Ryoko's nap was more important to her than watching Lord Tenchi's sword practice." She said with some slight glee.
She made a mental note to someway draw Tenchi's attention to the fact that Ryoko had not shown up to watch him.
"Now sister, you know Ryoko would not miss seeing Tenchi practice unless something delayed her." Sasami mildly scolded her.
Mihoshi nodded her head. "I hope something hasn't happened to her."
"We couldn't be that lucky." Ayeka muttered under her breath.
Sensing the sudden disappearance of the sun's warmth on her back Ayeka glanced back and saw a frowning Ryoko had teleported directly behind her and was blocking the sun's rays from reaching her.
Ryoko ignored Ayeka and glanced over to where Mihoshi and Harley were sitting.
"I'm fine. Just stopped to pick us up some refreshments." She said raising the one hand that was clutching the Saki bottle and some of the cups. The shifting of the contents of her hands almost caused her to drop the pitcher of lemonade on Ayeka's head but she managed to stop it. She spared herself a brief mental thought of regret that it hadn't but with some effort she managed to push that thought to the back of her mind.
Sasami glancing over when Ryoko spoke only saw the Saki bottle. "Saki? I don't like Saki." She said with a slight pout.
"Don't worry Sasami I brought you some lemonade." Ryoko called out and then realizing that the longer she tried to balance the contents in her hands the more likely she would be to pull a `Mihoshi' and dump them, Ryoko phased out to reappear sitting cross legged between Sasami and Harley and carefully sat the bottle and the pitcher on the ground.
"Saki? What is Saki?" Harley never having heard of the drink turned and asked Mihoshi. Harley couldn't help herself. She just kept thinking of Mihoshi and Sasami as friends, even though she now knew that Mihoshi was a cop and thus a potential enemy.
"Saki is a drink from this area on this planet. Although variations of it can be found almost everywhere in the galaxy." Mihoshi explained. "It is made from rice. It has a kind of strong flavor but I think you will like it."
"Maybe like Sasami, I should just stick with lemonade." Harley cautiously said.
"Damn! I was hoping that the Saki would loosen her up so we could find out some things about her and that creep the Joker." Ryoko thought to herself. "I know what I'll try! It always works with prissy princess!"
"Of course. I can understand Harley. I mean if you don't think you are up to trying a adult's drink, perhaps lemonade is the best choice for you." Ryoko said with more than a hint of challenge in her voice.
"Hey! I'm an adult and I have probably drunk as much as you have." Harley said, then glancing at Ryoko she amended. "Well maybe not as much as you have but I have drank my share!"
While Ryoko tried to decide if she had been complimented or insulted, Mihoshi reached out and picking up two of the Saki cups poured her and Harley a drink.
Mihoshi without hesitation sipped the drink straight down. Harley smelled the clear liquid and cautiously took a sip. And immediately started coughing.
"Wow! That has a kick to it." She sputtered and then being acutely aware that Ryoko was watching her with a smirk, she drank the rest of her cup down. Ryoko immediately refilled it for her.
Ayeka with a humph, reached across her sister Sasami and picked up a cup and held it out for Ryoko to fill it. Ryoko paused for a moment and then shrugging filled it for her. After making sure that Harley's cup was full again she then poured herself a cup and finally filled the only glass she had brought with lemonade and handed it to Sasami.
"Thank you Ryoko." Sasami politely said. "That was very thoughtful of you to bring us something to drink. Wasn't it sister?"
Ayeka eyed Ryoko suspiciously. "Yes, yes it was very thoughtful of you Ryoko." To herself Ayeka thought. "A little too thoughtful. I wonder what she is scheming now?"
As the girls sipped their drinks and commented on how warm a day it was, Tenchi and his grandfather came out of the temple office carrying two wooden practice swords. Stopping several yards away from where the women were sitting, Yosho and Tenchi bowed to each other and the went into some basic sword movements to warm up before going into sparing.
Even though it had been Yosho's plan to have the girls come out to watch Tenchi spar so he could try to get through to the young woman Harley, he was worried that Tenchi would become distracted by them and thus do badly in today's practice. He noted with a little pride that Tenchi was concentrating on his form completely.
"He will make a superb swordsman someday." Yosho thought to himself.
"I just know that grandfather had the girls come up today so I would be distracted and he could humiliate me in front of them. Well, I'm not going to fall for it today! No matter what he throws at me I am not going to allow myself to be distracted!!" Tenchi thought to himself as he prepared for his grandfather to spring some surprise attack.
Yosho finishing his warm up moves, flowed to a stop and waited for Tenchi with his sword held casually pointing to the ground. He noted that when Tenchi finished his warm up maneuvers that he ended in a alert defensive stance.
"Excellent! The boy has finally learned not to drop his guard." Yosho suddenly realized that Tenchi was striving and concentrating harder than usual because he didn't want to be humiliated in front of the ladies. "Normally I don't believe in putting on a show for others but if this helps Tenchi to concentrate harder maybe I should have the women watch our practice sessions more often."
In the span of a few seconds Yosho went from relaxed old man casually holding a wooden sword to a relentless opponent slashing and hacking at Tenchi's defenses. Tenchi managed to block all the attacks and even launch a few of his own when he could spot a opening.
Ryoko divided her attention from watching her Tenchi fighting to making sure that Harley's Saki cup was always kept full. Ryoko frowned as she noticed that Harley was rapturously watching every graceful move Tenchi made.
"So, how long have you known this Joker person?" Ryoko asked her.
"Huh?" Harley answered distractedly. "Me and Mr. J? Oh I guess we've been together for about six or seven years now. Sometimes it seems like a lot longer."
Harley then gave a slight gasp and covered her eyes with her hand. She had been positive that the old man was going to smash in Tenchi's head with a mighty overhand slash but at the last second the boy had smoothly blocked the blow with his sword and made a slashing attack of his own towards the old man's stomach. Yosho easily blocked it and the two combatants were again moving back and forth in their fight.
Harley could not explain it. Every time she watched Tenchi she felt a strange attraction to the boy. She had feelings she could not explain. It was almost as if.....
"Can I ask you girls something?" Harley began hesitantly.
Mihoshi immediately nodded her head and Sasami smiled at her. "Sure ask away." Sasami said brightly. Ryoko and Ayeka looked a little more cautious but nodded their heads too.
"Well it's like this..." Harley started and then stopped. "I mean... Oh heck! Do you girls feel anything odd when you are around Tenchi?" Harley finally blurted out in frustration. Harley half expected Ryoko or Ayeka to attack her for her question but to her surprise Ayeka instead of flying into rage only smiled sadly.
"Oh not another one." Ayeka said and looked at Ryoko.
Ryoko gave her own sad smile and nodded her head in agreement with Ayeka. "Don't tell Tenchi but we have come up with a term for what you are feeling. We call it the `Tenchi effect.'" She said to Harley
"Tenchi effect?" Harley said and looked at each of the other women in turn.
"It's like no matter how much you screwed up in the past. Or how much pressure you were under to succeed...." Mihoshi began.
"Or what horrible things you might have done..." Ryoko continued.
"Or what duties or responsibilities you had..." Ayeka added
"They all fade away when you are around Tenchi and all you feel is safe and protected." Sasami finished for all of them.
"Is that what I am feeling?" Harley thought to herself. "Safe? Protected? Like everything in my past I could just up and leave it behind and be happy here? Be happy like the rest of these women and wait around and hope that someday Tenchi picks me to be with?" Harley shook her head and without noticing sipped the Saki that Ryoko had refilled her cup with. "No. My life is with Mr. J! To be by his side! That is until he kills me for a laugh." Harley sadly argued to herself. Glancing back up at the sparring going on between Tenchi and his grandfather she noticed that it had moved very close to where they were sitting.
"Tenchi!" Yosho yelled at him. "You are going to have to do better! I almost nailed you with that last attack."
"Well jeeze! You have never used that attack before. How am I suppose to know how to defend against it if it is the first time I have seen it?!" Tenchi yelled back.
"Oh? I see. You think you can ask your opponent in a real fight to please not use any moves you haven't seen before?!" Yosho yelled back.
"Well what do I do if I am being attacked by someone using moves I have never seen?" Tenchi replied.
"Ah! Finally an intelligent question. You should be cautious and if need be run away." Yosho explained.
"What?!" Tenchi yelled. "Isn't that cowardice?"
"Tenchi, Tenchi. It is truly a brave and noble dead man who never runs when face with a fight he does not know how to win. However, it is a wise and living man who knows when the fight should be fought and when it should be postponed. Remember this well Tenchi. If you can choose the battlefield for a fight, always do it. If you can't choose the battlefield then choose the time. If you can do neither then at least know your opponent and his weaknesses. If you can do none of these things then you must ask yourself, should I really fight at this time?" Yosho pulled back for a moment and Tenchi allowed himself a moment to rest, but still in a alert defensive position.
"You must always ask yourself if something is working. If it is not then it is time to change your tactics or move on if you can." Yosho said as if to Tenchi but he was looking at Harley the whole time.
Harley not sure if Yosho was talking to her or Tenchi thought about his words. "Perhaps it is time to think about whether I want to stay with Mr. J. from now on or to make a change?" She thought to herself as she sipped the Saki.
In the sky above the carrot fields, a black swirling cloud suddenly appeared nine feet above the ground. The clouds swirled faster and faster till they became a solid black disk floating in the air. With only the slightest of noises a figure dressed in black armor fell from the disk to land in a ready crouch in the fields. Batman from his defensive crouch quickly scanned the area he had fallen into.
When Robin had made the last connections to the Joker's machine and had activated it, Batman had had only a few moments to prepare himself before the black disk had fallen on him. Having no idea what kind of world he would find himself thrust into, Batman was still slightly shocked to find such a tranquil and normal looking scene as someone's farm.
Glancing up he watched as the black disk with a loud crack suddenly faded away. He had made arrangements with Robin that he would turn off the device to conserve power and turn it back on in exactly three hours.
Batman quickly activated a count down timer on his wrist's gauntlet computer.
"Three hours to locate, capture and return to this spot with Joker and Harley so Robin can bring us back." Batman thought to himself.
As Batman examined his surroundings in an effort to try to logically figure out where Joker might have wandered off to, Batman made a mental note to see about also finding a ladder so they could reach the floating disk when it reappeared.
Examing the ground Batman quickly located two sets of footprints that only could have come from the large shoes and the pointed slippers of Joker and Harley. They seemed to follow footprints made by simple sandals and headed off in a direction. Batman started to follow the trail when he quickly and without warning heard the unmistakable sounds of combat coming from another direction. Glancing in the two directions, Batman quickly decided to follow the sounds of battle first.
Washu deep in her lab, looked up as she heard a warning noise from some equipment she had set up. Rapidly tapping keys on her keyboard she examined the results being displayed on the screen in front of her.
"Another portal has been opened nearby!" She muttered out loud to Joker hanging limply in her medical scanner. Washu peered at the readouts for a moment. "And from these readings, it matches your home dimension." She said turning to stare up at the still closed eyed Joker. "Friends of yours I wonder?"
"I doubt it." Joker said and then opened his eyes to stare back at Washu.
"What?! You should still be knocked out! That voltage was enough to knock a man out for hours!" Washu replied in shock and took a few steps away from where he was hanging.
The Joker laughed for a moment. "Sorry Doc. Little things like electro shock therapy loses it's effectiveness after a while. I have almost gotten to the point back in Arkham where I enjoy it."
The Joker then made a sudden convulsive motion with his right arm dropping one of his `special' Joker cards into his hand. Throwing it upwards with a flick of his wrist, the card sliced through the tentacle holding his arm with ease. With several more rapid wrist movements Joker severed all the tentacles holding him and made a mad dash for the lab door was gone.
Washu the greatest scientific genius in the universe looked at the severed tentacles and the lab door which the Joker had just made his escape and said the first profound thing to enter her mind.
"Oh shit!" She said.
Looking up at the ceiling she yelled. "Get down here right now!"
A long metal tentacle with a glassy like eye dropped down to her level and `looked' at her.
"Why didn't you stop him?!" She asked the eye, which was the optical scanner for the artificial intelligence computers that guarded her lab. A series of high pitched squeals and squeaks were heard. Washu hung her head and then shook it. "Okay, okay! So I did say to only restrain or stop him if he tried to attack me and I never said stop him if he tried to leave!"
The eye made a motion as if nodding and then slowly pulled back into the ceiling of the lab.
"Artificial intelligence my ass!" Washu muttered to herself. "I really need to work on them some more. Even Mihoshi would have been smart enough to know to stop him from escaping from my lab."
Batman from his vantage point in a tree near the temple grounds watched the fight between a young man and a much older man. After watching for a few moments Batman decided rightfully so that he was witnessing not a real fight but a training session. Continuing to scan the grounds with his binoculars Batman spied some young women watching the training. He noted the odd appearance and clothing of some of the women and had almost continued past them but then returned to examine them more closely. It took him several moments before he consciously realized what his subconscious had spotted. The young blond wearing nothing but pigtails and a man's shirt was Harley Quinn out of her costume.
Yosho was happy with how Tenchi's training had been going this afternoon. Tenchi had applied himself really hard to the lessons and Yosho could see a thoughtful look on the young woman Harley as well. "Not too bad. Managed to `kill two birds with one stone.'" Yosho congratulated himself. Sensing something he immediately stopped his attack that he had been pressing on Tenchi and stepped several steps backwards quickly.
Tenchi not knowing what was going on but still grateful for the breather, assumed a defensive stance and waited for his grandfather to renew the attack again.
"Training is over with for today Tenchi. Take the women back to the house." Yosho announced.
Tenchi was confused. While the training had been slightly more vigorous than usual, it was also a lot shorter than normal. "Are you sure grandfather? I am not really tired. We could do some more..."
"Tenchi do not argue! Escort the women back to the house. I will be there shortly!" Yosho said and reaching out took the wooden sword from Tenchi's grasp and turning calmly walked back towards the temple office.
Batman watching Harley as she sat and chatted with the other women became aware that the sounds of combat had disappeared. Turning the binoculars towards where the two men had been, he watched as the younger one headed over to the women, while the older one made slow progress towards the temple structure. Concentrating on the younger man for a moment Batman made sure that Harley was going with the group as they started to climb down the stairs. Swinging his binoculars back to where the old man had been Batman blinked. He was gone! At the rate he had been traveling he should have still been only half way towards the temple structure but now he was gone and Batman could not find him anywhere.
With a shrug Batman decided to climb down from the tree he had been hidden in and make his way to the stairway leading down from the temple and apprehend Harley there. He then could find out where the Joker was from her and plan his capture of him.
Batman quickly and quietly slithered down from his perch in the tree and turning around found himself face to face with the older man he had just seen with his binoculars.
"You know if you wanted to watch the training you could have just joined us at the temple. I'm sure we could have found you somewhere more comfortable to view it than sitting up in a tree." Yosho calmly said.
Ryoko walking beside Harley on the stairway suddenly gasped and put her hand to her head.
"Ryoko what is it?" Tenchi asked her worriedly.
"Nothing Tenchi. Just got a little dizzy there for a moment." Ryoko said to him. Inside her mind she questioned Washu. "What did you say again?"
"You heard me correctly the first time Little Ryoko. Joker escaped from my lab and is running loose somewhere on the Musaki grounds. Be extremely careful Ryoko! There is no telling what he will do now! Oh! And there is something else too. Before he escaped my equipment detected another portal opening from his dimension. There maybe some of his friends out there too now. Get everyone back to the house as quickly as you can." Washu told her daughter.
"What are you doing?" Ryoko asked.
"I'm using the readings I took from Joker to program my external scanners. It will be faster and more safer than us wandering around searching for him."
"Come on Tenchi! Let's get back to the house." Ryoko said to him.
Tenchi frowned as he noticed the sudden rush Ryoko seemed to be in. "What's the hurry?" He asked her.
"What? No hurry I just thought that everyone would like to get out of this afternoon heat and get inside where it's cooler." Ryoko said not too convincingly.
"My. You are being very thoughtful today." Ayeka said suspiciously.
Ryoko trying to keep an eye on the surrounding forest without Tenchi or Harley noticing replied distractedly. "Well that's just the kind of girl I am. Real thoughtful."
Tenchi not buying any of it stepped back to the step she was standing on and placed his hand on her forehead. "Are you okay Ryoko?" He asked worriedly. "You don't seem quite like yourself today. You are acting almost as if you were expecting someone to leap out and attack us all at any moment."
Ryoko her eyes widening slightly turned to look at Tenchi and gave a fake sounding laugh. "What? Don't be silly. Who would be out to attack us?" She asked while keeping one eye on a frowning Harley.
As Tenchi continued to stare worriedly at Ryoko, she suddenly heard a slight whistling noise coming from the surrounding forest. Reacting with her super human reflexes she snapped out her hand in front of Tenchi's face and caught one of Joker's razor sharp cards as it hurtled towards Tenchi's head.
Tenchi in shock stared at the card that was mere inches away from his face. As he looked on, he noticed a thin trickle of Ryoko's blood as it dripped out of her hand. She had managed to catch the card but not without injury.
"What the heck is going on?!" Tenchi finally shouted.
"We have to get everyone to safety Tenchi!" Ryoko said.
There came several more slight whooshing sounds as Joker threw more cards at them but these other cards met with Ayeka's forcefield. She had whipped the shield up as soon as she saw the card in Ryoko's hand.
Out of the corner of his eye Tenchi could see that Mihoshi had her galaxy patrol blaster out and was scanning the forest. A part of Tenchi's mind idly wondered where Mihoshi kept her blaster. He had not noticed her carrying it earlier.
"Did you see where he was at Mihoshi?" Ryoko asked the space cop.
"No. That green hair of his blends in with the forest too well." Mihoshi replied without taking her eyes off the surrounding forest.
"Green hair?!" Tenchi shouted in frustration. "You mean it's Mr. Joker attacking us? Why?"
Ryoko ignoring Tenchi for a moment looked at Mihoshi. "How did you know it was Joker?"
Mihoshi gave a unlady like snort. "Please Ryoko. I'm a Galaxy Patrol Officer. I sensed there was something criminal like about the Joker at first glance." Mihoshi shrugged. "I just figured that Washu could handle him."
"Washu! Has he done something to her?!" Tenchi asked grabbing Ryoko by her arm.
"No Tenchi. She is fine. He just managed to escape from her lab." Ryoko told him.
"Okay. Now will someone please tell me what is going on!" Tenchi shouted again.
Ryoko turned to stare at Harley. "Yes. Why don't you tell us what is going on?"
Harley could not face them and dropped her head to stare at the ground. In a quiet monotone voice she said. "Joker is an escaped mental patient from Arkham Institute for the Criminally Insane. He is a homicidal psychopath that lives to laugh at other people's pain."
Tenchi his eyes wide with shock. "And you let me take him to my house? My friends and my family?!" Tenchi's eyes widened even more as the realization hit him. "You were a patient of that institute too, weren't you?"
Harley still could not bring herself to look any of them in the eyes. She nodded her head and then replied. "Not at first. At first I was the doctor assigned to help him." She paused for a long moment. "Somewhere down the line things kind of got messed up." She finished lamely.
Tenchi opened his mouth to say something but was interrupted as Mihoshi started firing at something moving through the forest just at the edge of the stairway. Ayeka's force field would stop anything coming from the outside but allowed Mihoshi's blasts to pass through it.
Joker's high pitched laughter let everyone know she had missed however.
"He's heading towards the Shrine." Mihoshi stated.
"Grandfather! I have to go and warn him!" Tenchi said and started to head towards the edge of Ayeka's forcefield.
"No Tenchi! You can't! Joker has a gas he uses! It kills people by making them laugh themselves to death!" Harley said looking up in panic.
"Listen to her Tenchi! He tried to use it on me. The only reason it didn't affect me is that I am not from this planet. But you being half human it might kill you!" Ryoko pleaded with him as she grabbed him by the arm.
"Ryoko I want you to take everyone home. Get them inside and watch over them. I am going to warn grandfather and then I am going to stop this Joker!" Tenchi told her.
Reaching into his pocket he pulled out sword Tenchi.
"Didn't you hear Quinn and me? That gas of his might kill you. Let me go! We already know that it won't kill me, it only makes it hard for me to breathe for a while." Ryoko close to panic gripped his arms.
"Yes Lord Tenchi, let Ryoko or myself go. It only makes sense." Ayeka added her voice to Ryoko's.
"I am the police officer here. If anyone should go after Joker it should be me!" Mihoshi added.
Tenchi placed his hands on either side of Ryoko's face and gently carressed her cheek and then with a quick glance at everyone said. "This is my home and this is my family that Joker is threatening. I will deal with him. Now please Ryoko. Take everyone home and watch over them for me." Tenchi said to her.
Glancing at the others he added. "Ayeka you need to look after Sasami. And Mihoshi? I am relying on you to keep an eye on Harley Quinn for me."
Tenchi squared his shoulders and walked to the edge of Ayeka's forcefield.
"I won't let you out Tenchi. I will not have you risking your life like this when one of us is a better choice to go!" Ayeka told him.
Tenchi looked over at Sasami and only said. "Look after your sister." And then taking sword Tenchi he touched the edge of the forcefield with it and the forcefield neatly opened a circle in it letting him out.
"Damn that master key!" Ayeka forgetting her regale status for a moment shouted.
Look both ways before crossing the street. Don't accept either candy or rides from strangers. And your mileage may vary.
Thank you and please enjoy the story.
Tenchi meets The Joker
by Weirdbard
Chapter 6. Training and ambush. What an afternoon.
Ayeka carefully smoothed out her kimono style gown and sat herself down on the grassy courtyard of the temple. Looking around, she noted that Ryoko was no where in sight.
"I guess Ryoko's nap was more important to her than watching Lord Tenchi's sword practice." She said with some slight glee.
She made a mental note to someway draw Tenchi's attention to the fact that Ryoko had not shown up to watch him.
"Now sister, you know Ryoko would not miss seeing Tenchi practice unless something delayed her." Sasami mildly scolded her.
Mihoshi nodded her head. "I hope something hasn't happened to her."
"We couldn't be that lucky." Ayeka muttered under her breath.
Sensing the sudden disappearance of the sun's warmth on her back Ayeka glanced back and saw a frowning Ryoko had teleported directly behind her and was blocking the sun's rays from reaching her.
Ryoko ignored Ayeka and glanced over to where Mihoshi and Harley were sitting.
"I'm fine. Just stopped to pick us up some refreshments." She said raising the one hand that was clutching the Saki bottle and some of the cups. The shifting of the contents of her hands almost caused her to drop the pitcher of lemonade on Ayeka's head but she managed to stop it. She spared herself a brief mental thought of regret that it hadn't but with some effort she managed to push that thought to the back of her mind.
Sasami glancing over when Ryoko spoke only saw the Saki bottle. "Saki? I don't like Saki." She said with a slight pout.
"Don't worry Sasami I brought you some lemonade." Ryoko called out and then realizing that the longer she tried to balance the contents in her hands the more likely she would be to pull a `Mihoshi' and dump them, Ryoko phased out to reappear sitting cross legged between Sasami and Harley and carefully sat the bottle and the pitcher on the ground.
"Saki? What is Saki?" Harley never having heard of the drink turned and asked Mihoshi. Harley couldn't help herself. She just kept thinking of Mihoshi and Sasami as friends, even though she now knew that Mihoshi was a cop and thus a potential enemy.
"Saki is a drink from this area on this planet. Although variations of it can be found almost everywhere in the galaxy." Mihoshi explained. "It is made from rice. It has a kind of strong flavor but I think you will like it."
"Maybe like Sasami, I should just stick with lemonade." Harley cautiously said.
"Damn! I was hoping that the Saki would loosen her up so we could find out some things about her and that creep the Joker." Ryoko thought to herself. "I know what I'll try! It always works with prissy princess!"
"Of course. I can understand Harley. I mean if you don't think you are up to trying a adult's drink, perhaps lemonade is the best choice for you." Ryoko said with more than a hint of challenge in her voice.
"Hey! I'm an adult and I have probably drunk as much as you have." Harley said, then glancing at Ryoko she amended. "Well maybe not as much as you have but I have drank my share!"
While Ryoko tried to decide if she had been complimented or insulted, Mihoshi reached out and picking up two of the Saki cups poured her and Harley a drink.
Mihoshi without hesitation sipped the drink straight down. Harley smelled the clear liquid and cautiously took a sip. And immediately started coughing.
"Wow! That has a kick to it." She sputtered and then being acutely aware that Ryoko was watching her with a smirk, she drank the rest of her cup down. Ryoko immediately refilled it for her.
Ayeka with a humph, reached across her sister Sasami and picked up a cup and held it out for Ryoko to fill it. Ryoko paused for a moment and then shrugging filled it for her. After making sure that Harley's cup was full again she then poured herself a cup and finally filled the only glass she had brought with lemonade and handed it to Sasami.
"Thank you Ryoko." Sasami politely said. "That was very thoughtful of you to bring us something to drink. Wasn't it sister?"
Ayeka eyed Ryoko suspiciously. "Yes, yes it was very thoughtful of you Ryoko." To herself Ayeka thought. "A little too thoughtful. I wonder what she is scheming now?"
As the girls sipped their drinks and commented on how warm a day it was, Tenchi and his grandfather came out of the temple office carrying two wooden practice swords. Stopping several yards away from where the women were sitting, Yosho and Tenchi bowed to each other and the went into some basic sword movements to warm up before going into sparing.
Even though it had been Yosho's plan to have the girls come out to watch Tenchi spar so he could try to get through to the young woman Harley, he was worried that Tenchi would become distracted by them and thus do badly in today's practice. He noted with a little pride that Tenchi was concentrating on his form completely.
"He will make a superb swordsman someday." Yosho thought to himself.
"I just know that grandfather had the girls come up today so I would be distracted and he could humiliate me in front of them. Well, I'm not going to fall for it today! No matter what he throws at me I am not going to allow myself to be distracted!!" Tenchi thought to himself as he prepared for his grandfather to spring some surprise attack.
Yosho finishing his warm up moves, flowed to a stop and waited for Tenchi with his sword held casually pointing to the ground. He noted that when Tenchi finished his warm up maneuvers that he ended in a alert defensive stance.
"Excellent! The boy has finally learned not to drop his guard." Yosho suddenly realized that Tenchi was striving and concentrating harder than usual because he didn't want to be humiliated in front of the ladies. "Normally I don't believe in putting on a show for others but if this helps Tenchi to concentrate harder maybe I should have the women watch our practice sessions more often."
In the span of a few seconds Yosho went from relaxed old man casually holding a wooden sword to a relentless opponent slashing and hacking at Tenchi's defenses. Tenchi managed to block all the attacks and even launch a few of his own when he could spot a opening.
Ryoko divided her attention from watching her Tenchi fighting to making sure that Harley's Saki cup was always kept full. Ryoko frowned as she noticed that Harley was rapturously watching every graceful move Tenchi made.
"So, how long have you known this Joker person?" Ryoko asked her.
"Huh?" Harley answered distractedly. "Me and Mr. J? Oh I guess we've been together for about six or seven years now. Sometimes it seems like a lot longer."
Harley then gave a slight gasp and covered her eyes with her hand. She had been positive that the old man was going to smash in Tenchi's head with a mighty overhand slash but at the last second the boy had smoothly blocked the blow with his sword and made a slashing attack of his own towards the old man's stomach. Yosho easily blocked it and the two combatants were again moving back and forth in their fight.
Harley could not explain it. Every time she watched Tenchi she felt a strange attraction to the boy. She had feelings she could not explain. It was almost as if.....
"Can I ask you girls something?" Harley began hesitantly.
Mihoshi immediately nodded her head and Sasami smiled at her. "Sure ask away." Sasami said brightly. Ryoko and Ayeka looked a little more cautious but nodded their heads too.
"Well it's like this..." Harley started and then stopped. "I mean... Oh heck! Do you girls feel anything odd when you are around Tenchi?" Harley finally blurted out in frustration. Harley half expected Ryoko or Ayeka to attack her for her question but to her surprise Ayeka instead of flying into rage only smiled sadly.
"Oh not another one." Ayeka said and looked at Ryoko.
Ryoko gave her own sad smile and nodded her head in agreement with Ayeka. "Don't tell Tenchi but we have come up with a term for what you are feeling. We call it the `Tenchi effect.'" She said to Harley
"Tenchi effect?" Harley said and looked at each of the other women in turn.
"It's like no matter how much you screwed up in the past. Or how much pressure you were under to succeed...." Mihoshi began.
"Or what horrible things you might have done..." Ryoko continued.
"Or what duties or responsibilities you had..." Ayeka added
"They all fade away when you are around Tenchi and all you feel is safe and protected." Sasami finished for all of them.
"Is that what I am feeling?" Harley thought to herself. "Safe? Protected? Like everything in my past I could just up and leave it behind and be happy here? Be happy like the rest of these women and wait around and hope that someday Tenchi picks me to be with?" Harley shook her head and without noticing sipped the Saki that Ryoko had refilled her cup with. "No. My life is with Mr. J! To be by his side! That is until he kills me for a laugh." Harley sadly argued to herself. Glancing back up at the sparring going on between Tenchi and his grandfather she noticed that it had moved very close to where they were sitting.
"Tenchi!" Yosho yelled at him. "You are going to have to do better! I almost nailed you with that last attack."
"Well jeeze! You have never used that attack before. How am I suppose to know how to defend against it if it is the first time I have seen it?!" Tenchi yelled back.
"Oh? I see. You think you can ask your opponent in a real fight to please not use any moves you haven't seen before?!" Yosho yelled back.
"Well what do I do if I am being attacked by someone using moves I have never seen?" Tenchi replied.
"Ah! Finally an intelligent question. You should be cautious and if need be run away." Yosho explained.
"What?!" Tenchi yelled. "Isn't that cowardice?"
"Tenchi, Tenchi. It is truly a brave and noble dead man who never runs when face with a fight he does not know how to win. However, it is a wise and living man who knows when the fight should be fought and when it should be postponed. Remember this well Tenchi. If you can choose the battlefield for a fight, always do it. If you can't choose the battlefield then choose the time. If you can do neither then at least know your opponent and his weaknesses. If you can do none of these things then you must ask yourself, should I really fight at this time?" Yosho pulled back for a moment and Tenchi allowed himself a moment to rest, but still in a alert defensive position.
"You must always ask yourself if something is working. If it is not then it is time to change your tactics or move on if you can." Yosho said as if to Tenchi but he was looking at Harley the whole time.
Harley not sure if Yosho was talking to her or Tenchi thought about his words. "Perhaps it is time to think about whether I want to stay with Mr. J. from now on or to make a change?" She thought to herself as she sipped the Saki.
In the sky above the carrot fields, a black swirling cloud suddenly appeared nine feet above the ground. The clouds swirled faster and faster till they became a solid black disk floating in the air. With only the slightest of noises a figure dressed in black armor fell from the disk to land in a ready crouch in the fields. Batman from his defensive crouch quickly scanned the area he had fallen into.
When Robin had made the last connections to the Joker's machine and had activated it, Batman had had only a few moments to prepare himself before the black disk had fallen on him. Having no idea what kind of world he would find himself thrust into, Batman was still slightly shocked to find such a tranquil and normal looking scene as someone's farm.
Glancing up he watched as the black disk with a loud crack suddenly faded away. He had made arrangements with Robin that he would turn off the device to conserve power and turn it back on in exactly three hours.
Batman quickly activated a count down timer on his wrist's gauntlet computer.
"Three hours to locate, capture and return to this spot with Joker and Harley so Robin can bring us back." Batman thought to himself.
As Batman examined his surroundings in an effort to try to logically figure out where Joker might have wandered off to, Batman made a mental note to see about also finding a ladder so they could reach the floating disk when it reappeared.
Examing the ground Batman quickly located two sets of footprints that only could have come from the large shoes and the pointed slippers of Joker and Harley. They seemed to follow footprints made by simple sandals and headed off in a direction. Batman started to follow the trail when he quickly and without warning heard the unmistakable sounds of combat coming from another direction. Glancing in the two directions, Batman quickly decided to follow the sounds of battle first.
Washu deep in her lab, looked up as she heard a warning noise from some equipment she had set up. Rapidly tapping keys on her keyboard she examined the results being displayed on the screen in front of her.
"Another portal has been opened nearby!" She muttered out loud to Joker hanging limply in her medical scanner. Washu peered at the readouts for a moment. "And from these readings, it matches your home dimension." She said turning to stare up at the still closed eyed Joker. "Friends of yours I wonder?"
"I doubt it." Joker said and then opened his eyes to stare back at Washu.
"What?! You should still be knocked out! That voltage was enough to knock a man out for hours!" Washu replied in shock and took a few steps away from where he was hanging.
The Joker laughed for a moment. "Sorry Doc. Little things like electro shock therapy loses it's effectiveness after a while. I have almost gotten to the point back in Arkham where I enjoy it."
The Joker then made a sudden convulsive motion with his right arm dropping one of his `special' Joker cards into his hand. Throwing it upwards with a flick of his wrist, the card sliced through the tentacle holding his arm with ease. With several more rapid wrist movements Joker severed all the tentacles holding him and made a mad dash for the lab door was gone.
Washu the greatest scientific genius in the universe looked at the severed tentacles and the lab door which the Joker had just made his escape and said the first profound thing to enter her mind.
"Oh shit!" She said.
Looking up at the ceiling she yelled. "Get down here right now!"
A long metal tentacle with a glassy like eye dropped down to her level and `looked' at her.
"Why didn't you stop him?!" She asked the eye, which was the optical scanner for the artificial intelligence computers that guarded her lab. A series of high pitched squeals and squeaks were heard. Washu hung her head and then shook it. "Okay, okay! So I did say to only restrain or stop him if he tried to attack me and I never said stop him if he tried to leave!"
The eye made a motion as if nodding and then slowly pulled back into the ceiling of the lab.
"Artificial intelligence my ass!" Washu muttered to herself. "I really need to work on them some more. Even Mihoshi would have been smart enough to know to stop him from escaping from my lab."
Batman from his vantage point in a tree near the temple grounds watched the fight between a young man and a much older man. After watching for a few moments Batman decided rightfully so that he was witnessing not a real fight but a training session. Continuing to scan the grounds with his binoculars Batman spied some young women watching the training. He noted the odd appearance and clothing of some of the women and had almost continued past them but then returned to examine them more closely. It took him several moments before he consciously realized what his subconscious had spotted. The young blond wearing nothing but pigtails and a man's shirt was Harley Quinn out of her costume.
Yosho was happy with how Tenchi's training had been going this afternoon. Tenchi had applied himself really hard to the lessons and Yosho could see a thoughtful look on the young woman Harley as well. "Not too bad. Managed to `kill two birds with one stone.'" Yosho congratulated himself. Sensing something he immediately stopped his attack that he had been pressing on Tenchi and stepped several steps backwards quickly.
Tenchi not knowing what was going on but still grateful for the breather, assumed a defensive stance and waited for his grandfather to renew the attack again.
"Training is over with for today Tenchi. Take the women back to the house." Yosho announced.
Tenchi was confused. While the training had been slightly more vigorous than usual, it was also a lot shorter than normal. "Are you sure grandfather? I am not really tired. We could do some more..."
"Tenchi do not argue! Escort the women back to the house. I will be there shortly!" Yosho said and reaching out took the wooden sword from Tenchi's grasp and turning calmly walked back towards the temple office.
Batman watching Harley as she sat and chatted with the other women became aware that the sounds of combat had disappeared. Turning the binoculars towards where the two men had been, he watched as the younger one headed over to the women, while the older one made slow progress towards the temple structure. Concentrating on the younger man for a moment Batman made sure that Harley was going with the group as they started to climb down the stairs. Swinging his binoculars back to where the old man had been Batman blinked. He was gone! At the rate he had been traveling he should have still been only half way towards the temple structure but now he was gone and Batman could not find him anywhere.
With a shrug Batman decided to climb down from the tree he had been hidden in and make his way to the stairway leading down from the temple and apprehend Harley there. He then could find out where the Joker was from her and plan his capture of him.
Batman quickly and quietly slithered down from his perch in the tree and turning around found himself face to face with the older man he had just seen with his binoculars.
"You know if you wanted to watch the training you could have just joined us at the temple. I'm sure we could have found you somewhere more comfortable to view it than sitting up in a tree." Yosho calmly said.
Ryoko walking beside Harley on the stairway suddenly gasped and put her hand to her head.
"Ryoko what is it?" Tenchi asked her worriedly.
"Nothing Tenchi. Just got a little dizzy there for a moment." Ryoko said to him. Inside her mind she questioned Washu. "What did you say again?"
"You heard me correctly the first time Little Ryoko. Joker escaped from my lab and is running loose somewhere on the Musaki grounds. Be extremely careful Ryoko! There is no telling what he will do now! Oh! And there is something else too. Before he escaped my equipment detected another portal opening from his dimension. There maybe some of his friends out there too now. Get everyone back to the house as quickly as you can." Washu told her daughter.
"What are you doing?" Ryoko asked.
"I'm using the readings I took from Joker to program my external scanners. It will be faster and more safer than us wandering around searching for him."
"Come on Tenchi! Let's get back to the house." Ryoko said to him.
Tenchi frowned as he noticed the sudden rush Ryoko seemed to be in. "What's the hurry?" He asked her.
"What? No hurry I just thought that everyone would like to get out of this afternoon heat and get inside where it's cooler." Ryoko said not too convincingly.
"My. You are being very thoughtful today." Ayeka said suspiciously.
Ryoko trying to keep an eye on the surrounding forest without Tenchi or Harley noticing replied distractedly. "Well that's just the kind of girl I am. Real thoughtful."
Tenchi not buying any of it stepped back to the step she was standing on and placed his hand on her forehead. "Are you okay Ryoko?" He asked worriedly. "You don't seem quite like yourself today. You are acting almost as if you were expecting someone to leap out and attack us all at any moment."
Ryoko her eyes widening slightly turned to look at Tenchi and gave a fake sounding laugh. "What? Don't be silly. Who would be out to attack us?" She asked while keeping one eye on a frowning Harley.
As Tenchi continued to stare worriedly at Ryoko, she suddenly heard a slight whistling noise coming from the surrounding forest. Reacting with her super human reflexes she snapped out her hand in front of Tenchi's face and caught one of Joker's razor sharp cards as it hurtled towards Tenchi's head.
Tenchi in shock stared at the card that was mere inches away from his face. As he looked on, he noticed a thin trickle of Ryoko's blood as it dripped out of her hand. She had managed to catch the card but not without injury.
"What the heck is going on?!" Tenchi finally shouted.
"We have to get everyone to safety Tenchi!" Ryoko said.
There came several more slight whooshing sounds as Joker threw more cards at them but these other cards met with Ayeka's forcefield. She had whipped the shield up as soon as she saw the card in Ryoko's hand.
Out of the corner of his eye Tenchi could see that Mihoshi had her galaxy patrol blaster out and was scanning the forest. A part of Tenchi's mind idly wondered where Mihoshi kept her blaster. He had not noticed her carrying it earlier.
"Did you see where he was at Mihoshi?" Ryoko asked the space cop.
"No. That green hair of his blends in with the forest too well." Mihoshi replied without taking her eyes off the surrounding forest.
"Green hair?!" Tenchi shouted in frustration. "You mean it's Mr. Joker attacking us? Why?"
Ryoko ignoring Tenchi for a moment looked at Mihoshi. "How did you know it was Joker?"
Mihoshi gave a unlady like snort. "Please Ryoko. I'm a Galaxy Patrol Officer. I sensed there was something criminal like about the Joker at first glance." Mihoshi shrugged. "I just figured that Washu could handle him."
"Washu! Has he done something to her?!" Tenchi asked grabbing Ryoko by her arm.
"No Tenchi. She is fine. He just managed to escape from her lab." Ryoko told him.
"Okay. Now will someone please tell me what is going on!" Tenchi shouted again.
Ryoko turned to stare at Harley. "Yes. Why don't you tell us what is going on?"
Harley could not face them and dropped her head to stare at the ground. In a quiet monotone voice she said. "Joker is an escaped mental patient from Arkham Institute for the Criminally Insane. He is a homicidal psychopath that lives to laugh at other people's pain."
Tenchi his eyes wide with shock. "And you let me take him to my house? My friends and my family?!" Tenchi's eyes widened even more as the realization hit him. "You were a patient of that institute too, weren't you?"
Harley still could not bring herself to look any of them in the eyes. She nodded her head and then replied. "Not at first. At first I was the doctor assigned to help him." She paused for a long moment. "Somewhere down the line things kind of got messed up." She finished lamely.
Tenchi opened his mouth to say something but was interrupted as Mihoshi started firing at something moving through the forest just at the edge of the stairway. Ayeka's force field would stop anything coming from the outside but allowed Mihoshi's blasts to pass through it.
Joker's high pitched laughter let everyone know she had missed however.
"He's heading towards the Shrine." Mihoshi stated.
"Grandfather! I have to go and warn him!" Tenchi said and started to head towards the edge of Ayeka's forcefield.
"No Tenchi! You can't! Joker has a gas he uses! It kills people by making them laugh themselves to death!" Harley said looking up in panic.
"Listen to her Tenchi! He tried to use it on me. The only reason it didn't affect me is that I am not from this planet. But you being half human it might kill you!" Ryoko pleaded with him as she grabbed him by the arm.
"Ryoko I want you to take everyone home. Get them inside and watch over them. I am going to warn grandfather and then I am going to stop this Joker!" Tenchi told her.
Reaching into his pocket he pulled out sword Tenchi.
"Didn't you hear Quinn and me? That gas of his might kill you. Let me go! We already know that it won't kill me, it only makes it hard for me to breathe for a while." Ryoko close to panic gripped his arms.
"Yes Lord Tenchi, let Ryoko or myself go. It only makes sense." Ayeka added her voice to Ryoko's.
"I am the police officer here. If anyone should go after Joker it should be me!" Mihoshi added.
Tenchi placed his hands on either side of Ryoko's face and gently carressed her cheek and then with a quick glance at everyone said. "This is my home and this is my family that Joker is threatening. I will deal with him. Now please Ryoko. Take everyone home and watch over them for me." Tenchi said to her.
Glancing at the others he added. "Ayeka you need to look after Sasami. And Mihoshi? I am relying on you to keep an eye on Harley Quinn for me."
Tenchi squared his shoulders and walked to the edge of Ayeka's forcefield.
"I won't let you out Tenchi. I will not have you risking your life like this when one of us is a better choice to go!" Ayeka told him.
Tenchi looked over at Sasami and only said. "Look after your sister." And then taking sword Tenchi he touched the edge of the forcefield with it and the forcefield neatly opened a circle in it letting him out.
"Damn that master key!" Ayeka forgetting her regale status for a moment shouted.