A/N: I'm back with Insanity degree at 200. On with the story...will Harry and the gang make it to the Portkey in 30 seconds? What is the thing that can change Voldemort's life forever? Find out in this chapter.

Disclaimer: HARRY POTTER, characters, names and related indicia are trademarks of Warner Bros. Harry Potter Publishing Rights belongs to J.K. Rowling.

Chapter 6

The Affairs of the Sun Lotion

"HURRY!!!!!"

They all zoomed to the end of the Underground and found the Leaky Cauldron. They did not need to rotate the doorknob. In this situation, they dashed towards the door and smashed it with their fantastic speed. They raced to the wall and like an F1 car, Harry tapped the wand on the usual brick 3 times.

"NOW!!!"

They rushed to the dustbin. "TEN SECONDS!!!"

The crowd gave way as the gang ran towards the dustbin. Or should I say, LEAPT at the dustbin.

9...8...7...6...5...4

Suddenly, a waiter hit the leaping people and they tripped and fell onto the floor. They were still 90 feet away from the dustbin! As the gang jumped out they dashed towards it like an airplane zooming along the runway about to take off.

3...2...

20 feet away.

...1...

They leapt at 15 feet.

...0.75...

At 9.25 feet they start to fall.

...0.5...

4.89 feet, they hit the ground and tumbled to the dustbin.

...0.25...

(A/N: Am I torturing you?)

Clutched the dustbin.

...0!

BOOM!

Then, they disappeared. The crowd just stared at the corner where the dustbin used to be.

At the Space Asylum...

Lord Voldemort walked back and forth across the huge cage. It had been a day, since he made "friends" with the astronauts in space. Now, he is a prisoner.

He looked outside the window and saw a bunch of children far away during recess.

They seem to be having more fun, he thought. He began to think of the times he had before he took up drinking caffeine-high coffee.

About the times when he was the meanest guy on Earth. About the times when he was ready to do some murder. About the times when he murdered two of the best wizards in Hogwarts. About the downfall he had while trying to kill one baby.

Then, he got an idea. "I'll surrender! Maybe, I can have more fun in the Good Side!" But it was too late. He will never get out.

An astronaut came in with a glass of lemonade...

...and a strange-looking bottle.

"What is that?" The astronaut looked at Voldemort. "You can speak English?"

"Duh!"

"This is sun lotion."

"Sun lotion?"

The astronaut was surprised at Voldemort's expression. He doesn't know sun lotion?

"Sun Lotion is some gooey white cream you put on your skin to avoid sun burns..."

"Sun Burns?"

"The red spots you have on your skin if you are exposed to sun for too long."

The astronaut was about to walk away when Voldemort asked, "Can I have it?"

"What?"

"The Sun lotion."

"Fine."

Slowly, he gave the yellow bottle to the mad fellow.

At first, Voldemort opened the cap of the bottle. He shook the bottle but nothing came out.

Then, he squeezed the bottle. A squirt of slimy white cream squirted out. He looked at it and sniffed at it. Then he turned his face away with a frown of disgust.

Afterwards, he rubbed it on his arm. Then his eyes widened. He rubbed it again and a smile lined along his mouth. Then he rubbed it faster.

"MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!"

He then rubbed the sun lotion on his other arm and laughed hysterically. He pointed the bottle at his face and squeezed it hard. A huge blast of cream squirted at his face.

"NYAHAHAHAHA!!" laughed Voldemort with joy. He rubbed it everywhere and then he ripped off his clothes...

The guard stood there in shock with his mouth open as Voldie rubbed the sun lotion on his whole body. And then he squeezed the whole bottle and another blast of white cream shot out. Soon enough he was practically having the shower of his life.

Afterwards, he squeezed the bottle but nothing came out. He finished the bottle.

"Can I have another bottle?" questioned Voldemort with his eyes filled with tears.

The guard who was so shocked took out a huge box filled with bottles of sun lotion.

Voldemort grabbed one bottle, opened the lid and blasted a fountain of sun lotion in his mouth.

"YUMMY!!! BURP!!!! "

Voldemort jumped up and down squirting sun lotion everywhere. He then pointed the bottle at the guard's face and smacked the bottom of the bottle and POOF!!! The guard ran away from the cell screaming like crazy with an extremely white face.

After a while, Inn D. Pink came into the scene with the white-faced guard. But it was too late. Voldemort already opened the 37th bottle and started squirting around his white naked body. Sun lotion started oozing through the steel bars.

"EMERGENCY SHUTTERS!!!" yelled Inn. The guard with the white face ran towards a lever and pulled it down. Then glass panels came down from the ceiling and enclosed the whole cell. But at that time the cell was flooded with sun lotion.

"WEEEEEE!!!!!" laughed Voldemort with joy as he swam in the cream. His body was as pale as ever.

Bottles of sun lotion were floating in the gooey pool. Voldemort then opened his 97th bottle and blasted a fountain into the pool. Then he found a metal bar. Voldie picked it up and bashed on the bottle causing a more powerful blast. Then he accidentally screeched the bar on the steel bars of the cell and there was fire. And as you know that sun lotion is flammable...

BOOM!!!! The whole cell was on fire. Voldemort stopped jumping but then broke into a more hysterical laugh as he somersaulted in the fire bobbing up and down in the flaming pool. The flame was so hot that it broke the glass, causing the flaming liquid to flow out.

"ARRRGGHHH!!!!" shouted both Inn and the guard as they ran out of the Cell Group 4. The liquid rapidly chased after them and soon...

BOOM!!!! BOOM!!!!! BOOM!!!! BOOM!!!! BOOM!!! BOOM!!!

Red Scar: CUT!!!! What's wrong with you two! Hit the spark plug once! Not 6 times!

Sound Effects Technician 1: *giggle*

Sound Effects Technician 2: *hit the spark plug* (BOOM!!!!)

Red Scar: You are Fred and George again!!!! Get out you BLABBERING BLUBBERHEADS!!! Have fun in Studio 15 if you like. They are now making the movie "BOMB OF DOOM".

Fred: But the actors are wearing NIKE SHOES!!!

Red Scar: *sigh* Just go you blubberheads. @#$%!!!! GO!!!!

BOOM!!!

The fire could be seen by the boys who were doing recess as Voldemort saw earlier.

"SEND HIM TO CELL W17!!" said Inn to a guard as the fire fighters started erasing the flames.

"You mean the most toughest cell in this building?"

"DUH!!! THIS FEMICADRON IS HIGHLY DANGEROUS! Not to mention extremely insane."

At last, when it was over, the guards dragged a sun lotion-drinking Voldemort all the way to the cell W17.

A/N: The end of Chapter 6. This is what you will see in days to come.

NEXT: The meeting with the International Confederation of Wizards will be held. Will the proposal to rescue Lord Voldemort work. If so, WHO WILL DO THE TASK?