Chapter Two-Evil
This is an e-mail I sent to my friend one time when I liked the guy mentioned in it. Two things- One I no longer like the guy and two, I was hyper. Oh speaking of hyper I am right now cause I'm gonna be a big sis in two weeks! I just found out today!
I am starting to think Fred is crazy... (goes off muttering to self something about "My precious...") But cool pictureses-pictures. I likes them (hee hee hee) preciouis pictures... MINE!!! MINE!! MINE!!!
-Arwen ( is a bit detained right now)
In the background you hear a scuffling of feet then a wicked cackle
HA! HA! HA! MY PRECIOUS!!! MY PRECIOUSSSSSSSSSSS...............
(falls into the Cracks of Doom)
Frodo: Let's split!
Sam: Yes, sir! You betcha!
(Frodo gets distracted and falls into the Cracks of Doom. You hear a trailing "Ooooooppppppsssss!!!!!!AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!" Sam realizes what happened)
Sam: (throwing himself into the Cracks of Doom) I'm comin' Mr. FrodoOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!
(Enter Aragorn, Gandalf, Legolas, Gimli, Merry, Pippin and a zombie Boromir)
Aragorn: No! They were supposed to live! I must rescue them!(throws himself into the Cracks of Doom. Legolas is about to say something but Arwen runs onto the scene screaming bloody murder at Aragorn and jumps into the Cracks. Pretty soon everyone from the fellowship is throwing themselves into the Cracks of Doom and the Cracks, overstuffed, explodes sending Middle Earth into the second darkness the fellowship was trying to prevent from coming.)
Where is Gollum in all this? you may ask.
My Precioussssss........... gollum......... I is ruler of Middle Earth now....... ha ha ha ha........
(Anyway Gollum traipses around near the edge of the Cracks and pretty soon, traipses right off the edge like all the other blundering idiots of Middle Earth.)
I just wanted to get that out because I figured I gotta hate on LotR sometime and why not get it out NOW?
-Valerie( I can't be Arwen right now- she's in the Cracks) (Speaking of which I believe I have finally cracked- see you at school tomorrow...)
Here is another e-mail sent to the same friend. Note: This was before I stopped liking the guy. Another note: I luv LotR so much my friends call me Arwen and I call my friends Galadriel, Goldberry, Tinuviel, Eowyn, etc.
Galadriel-
I am probably boring you immensely but my dad got the movie for me today. He bought it last night right in front of me and I didn't know it(so much for elf wisdom- its a cheap scam) Im just kidding but I just wanted to tell someone besides my dad that it's my precious... Hehehe... I is never letting precious go again....
-Gollum
(You hear a struggle and then)
No Gollum! Down bad hobbit-like-thing-corrupted-by-the-ring! It's my movie. ARAGORN! (Fred comes running in, Anduril drawn. He attacks Gollum)
Down Gollum! Down or I shall hew your head from your neck like an orc!
(Gollum retreats and jumps off a cliff)
Oh thank you Aragorn!
No problem Arwen.
(They kiss)
(How sick are my twisted little fantasies? But as Bilbo Baggins says "The Road goes ever ever on, down from the door where it began, now far ahead the Road has gond and I must follow if I can...")
-Arwen
Anyway Review Review Review! And there will be even more evil in the next chapter if I get enough reviews by Jan 1!
-stridersgurlarwen
This is an e-mail I sent to my friend one time when I liked the guy mentioned in it. Two things- One I no longer like the guy and two, I was hyper. Oh speaking of hyper I am right now cause I'm gonna be a big sis in two weeks! I just found out today!
I am starting to think Fred is crazy... (goes off muttering to self something about "My precious...") But cool pictureses-pictures. I likes them (hee hee hee) preciouis pictures... MINE!!! MINE!! MINE!!!
-Arwen ( is a bit detained right now)
In the background you hear a scuffling of feet then a wicked cackle
HA! HA! HA! MY PRECIOUS!!! MY PRECIOUSSSSSSSSSSS...............
(falls into the Cracks of Doom)
Frodo: Let's split!
Sam: Yes, sir! You betcha!
(Frodo gets distracted and falls into the Cracks of Doom. You hear a trailing "Ooooooppppppsssss!!!!!!AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!" Sam realizes what happened)
Sam: (throwing himself into the Cracks of Doom) I'm comin' Mr. FrodoOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!
(Enter Aragorn, Gandalf, Legolas, Gimli, Merry, Pippin and a zombie Boromir)
Aragorn: No! They were supposed to live! I must rescue them!(throws himself into the Cracks of Doom. Legolas is about to say something but Arwen runs onto the scene screaming bloody murder at Aragorn and jumps into the Cracks. Pretty soon everyone from the fellowship is throwing themselves into the Cracks of Doom and the Cracks, overstuffed, explodes sending Middle Earth into the second darkness the fellowship was trying to prevent from coming.)
Where is Gollum in all this? you may ask.
My Precioussssss........... gollum......... I is ruler of Middle Earth now....... ha ha ha ha........
(Anyway Gollum traipses around near the edge of the Cracks and pretty soon, traipses right off the edge like all the other blundering idiots of Middle Earth.)
I just wanted to get that out because I figured I gotta hate on LotR sometime and why not get it out NOW?
-Valerie( I can't be Arwen right now- she's in the Cracks) (Speaking of which I believe I have finally cracked- see you at school tomorrow...)
Here is another e-mail sent to the same friend. Note: This was before I stopped liking the guy. Another note: I luv LotR so much my friends call me Arwen and I call my friends Galadriel, Goldberry, Tinuviel, Eowyn, etc.
Galadriel-
I am probably boring you immensely but my dad got the movie for me today. He bought it last night right in front of me and I didn't know it(so much for elf wisdom- its a cheap scam) Im just kidding but I just wanted to tell someone besides my dad that it's my precious... Hehehe... I is never letting precious go again....
-Gollum
(You hear a struggle and then)
No Gollum! Down bad hobbit-like-thing-corrupted-by-the-ring! It's my movie. ARAGORN! (Fred comes running in, Anduril drawn. He attacks Gollum)
Down Gollum! Down or I shall hew your head from your neck like an orc!
(Gollum retreats and jumps off a cliff)
Oh thank you Aragorn!
No problem Arwen.
(They kiss)
(How sick are my twisted little fantasies? But as Bilbo Baggins says "The Road goes ever ever on, down from the door where it began, now far ahead the Road has gond and I must follow if I can...")
-Arwen
Anyway Review Review Review! And there will be even more evil in the next chapter if I get enough reviews by Jan 1!
-stridersgurlarwen